Do you think about that in the context of your breakup/heartbreak? How you’re the villain in their story?

Always been hearing abt guys as dumper come back but does female as dumper come back?

Would you get back together with a girl you broke up with (because of external circumstances, like moving for example), she didn't want to break up but accepted your decision, and she starts seeing other people months after the break up after she took some time to heal/get over you? If things lined up again (lets say, in the moving case, you either realize you want to try long distance, or you move back to the same area), would you be ok that she was with/dated other people in the interim, especially if quite a few months/years had past? And would you still want her back?

She also stopped reposting stuff on TikTok.

Am I winning the break up!??

We finally broke up after 3 years, and the guilt of what I did is still eating me alive. I never physically cheated on her or had any intention to, but I masturbated to somebody on Instagram that I heard of through a mutual friend. I had never talked to this person before and had no intention to. I have had a bad porn addiction for many years, and saw using this person's Instagram as nothing more than porn. She knew I thought this person was attractive however and was insecure of her. I truly had no intention of wanting to be with person or wanting to leave my ex for her, I just saw it as nothing more than porn or looking at a pornstar's Instagram. This obviously hurt my ex though, even though she stayed with me for another year. We broke up for other unrelated reasons. Even though I never physically cheated or had any intention of cheating, the fact that I hurt her like this still eats me alive. I'm still downing in guilt, and I feel like I don't deserve to get any better. I feel like I don't deserve to have any more relationships and I feel like I need some sort of punishment. Is this something I can recover from?

What’s the best dating apps to waste a man’s time on?

I started posting stories after being inactive on instagram for a very long time.

I've noticed my ex that I broke up with long ago (few years) saw my posts. After few months of him seeing my stories, he muted me.

Why would he mute me instead of unfollowing?
I get him not wanting to see the posts, but dont know why he wouldn't just unfollow me

To be honest it wasn’t really a hurtful thing that happened, but it was more of a misunderstanding after misunderstanding + built up trust issues from past experiences on the guys side. He also seemed pretty adamant that he wasn’t going to change his mind. (Trusted assumptions over me inherently)

Just wondering generally as well.

I M27 broke up with my girl 24F over 6 weeks ago and I’m kind of regretting it. We were a perfect match personality wise and I kind of broke up with her out of no where. We dated 4 months. I broke up because I thought I could do better, ik it’s shallow. But we really meshed and I’m wondering if maybe I should text her back. I did find her attractive and miss her. I’ve never felt this way after a breakup. I think about her everyday. When I go out I don’t even feel like talking to women, I don’t feel like going on dates either. And I cried after breaking up…the very next day. I even drove by her house the next day too cuz I missed her.

After 5 and a half years of dating and countless conversations about our plans for the future I decided to end things. These last two months I noticed a shift from of him putting less effort into our date, less effort in making time for us to hangout and less interested in my life in general. He was having a hard time losing a promotion opportunity at work and I wanted to give him the chance to heal. Recently we got in an argument about him not going to see my parents because he was “busy” to ask to marry me. After the fight he stopped taking to me for about 6 days. Then I reached out he had me waiting another 4 days for him to have time to talk to me. We were able to talk things out a little but for his birthday that weekend he asked me not to come to his family dinner and I was a bit hurt about it. He said we would have breakfast the next morning and ended up “waking up late” and after my rant on how it made me feel he didn’t answer my text until the next day due to family stuff. I told him I didn’t forgive him for that and he proceeded to not text or answer my calls for another 6 days. I got tired of trying to be there for someone who clearly doesn’t want me around. I broke things off through text because he felt too sick to see me in person or answer my calls (his location was at the gym)but it just feels so confusing how could someone say they want a future with you but can so easily just cut you out of their life. I still don’t understand want made him want to stop seeing and talking to me the only answer I got was “I’m going through some personal stuff”. Regardless I don’t think I deserve to have a relationship with a man who doesn’t trust me enough to tell me what “personal stuff” is going on.

I need to see something…

I’ve been so mentally over this relationship with my 27M partner, that I don’t even care to post on here and tell you all what my 7 years of hell has been like. I’m just DONE. I told him today that once our lease is up in 6 months, we’re separating. He can get his own apartment and I’ll get my own. I’m just overwhelmed and want reassurance from someone right now. I’m honestly scared. I’m worried about the financial impact and am I gonna be able to afford to live alone with our daughter. If anyone has ever been in this situation, I just need reassurance that everything is going to be okay and to hear y’all experiences with moving out and living alone. I’m thinking of the worst case scenario right now of being unable to afford an apartment and other expenses. I know that everything will work out for me because it always does, and I feel like this was a very intuitive decision. I just can’t help to think of the worst possible thing that can happen right now. I have very little time, and I don’t want my fears to consume me right now. Any kind words are welcome. Thank you

I broke up with my ex 8 months ago but since then have not been able to go more than a few days without reaching out. I became very sad, mad that he couldn’t control his drinking and that’s why I left and I basically told him that every day since in the hopes he would change. About 3 months in I started trying to come back. I did everything I possibly could to fix it and he was considering reconciling but then went off to a sober living community for 6-12
Months. Still in rehab I have messaged him daily begging for him to take me back.

He said the overwhelming messages have pushed him away further and that for a long time he just wanted space and i couldn’t give him that.
Now he said he just focusing on himself and that the doesn’t feel strong enough for me anymore. That I pushed him away and that he isn’t in a place to even trust himself with one woman…

Is it possible that if I stop reaching out for a long time he will come around? Maybe he never knew what it was like to really lose me. He is an avoidant attachment style and I am anxious so he was never great with me coming on strong I think.

My girlfriend broke up with me. We were together for 14 months. I bought her everything I could, kittens, jewellery, paid her bills, paid for her car, would take her on dates regularly, trips away. Would help around the house with the housework. Just did everything I possibly could to be a great boyfriend. We rarely argued and got on very well I thought.

5 weeks ago she broke up with me, then a week later she was on dating apps so I reached out to see if we could fix the relationship. She said that she no longer finds me attractive, that she doesn't know what she wants, i don't know how to lead in a relationship and that she wants to date other men to see if she is making the right decision.

I since joined Tinder and saw her profile. It says she would consider a relationship but is mostly looking for fun dates and a man that will buy her gifts and provide. Basically everything I done. Seems she is happy dating and we haven't spoken in 4 weeks.

We rarely argued but she did split up with me three times in 6 months. Each occasion it was due to minor arguments.

She was the nicest woman ever. But now she just seems cold and switched off.

Do you think they will regret their decision and reach out or should I just move on?

Tldr:

Please if someone have time give it a read i need serious help with some reassurance or tips or anything

Im sitting here after 40 days of ending 3 years of relationship with my ex gf

And i got so strong but now im tired today again of composing myself she gave me life long trust issues i remember her crying begging me not to leave 10 thousand times during those 3 years she would claim to die if i left her etc etc she showed up differently from every other girl to keep me trauma bonded to her she won my trust that she's a Gem in todays generation I treated her like my princess i lost myself my health my family my everything for her i ruined my studies just to be her perfect partner she was chaotic and she would abandon me for 20 20 days sometimes 3 sometimes 5 sometimes 10 it was so triggering im anxious leaning secure man and it made me terrible i lashed out at her at times i screamed i begged for basic human decency and in return she would turn ice cold not saying i love you back or even listening to me crying she would smirk and lied to me gaslighted me

Butttt whyyyyy am i still gaslight im still thinking i was the problem and when i think no she was the problem then grief and anger hits me why did she do it to me and then same girl who cried 10 thousand times to not leave her or she would die didn't reach out in 40 days living her life as if nothing mattered i wonder if she is even a human being

But im still trauma bonded and i can't stop looking at her profiles even if i block her and she's following random men and i die here thinking of her having sex with somebody else I don't want her but still the thought of her being with someone else I can't let that go it tightens my chest and i feel sharp pains

I desperately want her guilt and sorry and for her to realize that she did something wrong so that i will get my closure

I feel worthless

I feel helpless why do my brain and heart can't agree that people can be cruel to best partners and it's not about me i feel like it's about me and there are so many emotions that I can't understand

I was doing so great but suddenly i hit days like these and i feel helpless talking to anyone doing anything nothing makes me feel okay

Someone give me some hope or anything that one day these things won't matter anymore and how what should i do im praying I'm hitting gym im getting appreciation letters on my new job just in 18 days im their best employee than those who are there for years im young man energetic and i love my job that's why im doing so great but nothing seems to help i journal i do self care and everything

We broke up because of distance two months ago

I’m thinking of asking him if we can make it work until he moves away for good

I think he’s thinking another year together will make the breakup harder but I’m thinking it wouldn’t be a year I’m grateful we got to spend together

Any advice or anyone willing to chat about this please I have been going through it ☹️

It’s been about five months since my ex cheated on me and disrespected me in more ways than I can even fit into one post. I really thought I had forgiven him and moved forward with God, but last night all the anger came rushing back.

I texted him out of frustration, basically wanting him to finally understand how deeply he hurt me. Instead of acknowledging anything or apologizing, he replied, “I miss you too.” That made me even angrier because it felt like he completely ignored my pain and turned my anger into proof that I still wanted him.

Maybe a part of me does miss who I thought he was, but I do not miss the betrayal. I think what I actually miss is the apology and accountability I never received. I want him to understand the damage he caused, but I’m realizing I may never get that from him.

Can you genuinely forgive someone and still feel furious when they refuse to admit what they did? I don’t want him back. I just hate that he gets to act unaffected while I’m still processing everything.

So i have been uncontrollably running back to my ex, begging him to love me, asking for accountability, fix things blah blah blah and i thought I won't talk again day before yesterday but today I went back to him again lol. We were talking about offtopics and suddenly he was replying to me faster and all. It's like he rather be gay than be with me.

Mind you in all these 5 months of turmoil, he never once gave me a clear ending and said " let's break up". He ignored me and I was the one leaving unable to bear his nature but I come back after 2-3-5 days begging again, nagging he doesn't love me enough. In this process I've lost so much dignity and it's in infinity negative maybe lol.

So today, around the end of the convo, he was like " don't be with me, don't love me". I dunno but suddenly felt disgusted, disgusted how the whole interaction felt disrespectful and how he seemed to take me as a thing he couldn't care less. I felt the ick. It feels like I've lost my love for him.

I have always been afraid of getting over him and loosing my love for him. I honestly wanted to love him for life, even after he left me so broken. And it feels like it just happened before, the very thing I was afraid of. I'm starting to feel like why i were even with him. But yeah he was very sweet then.

I wish I didn't talk to him today. I could've saved the love I had for him. I dunno if i should be happy or sad. Well kinda sad cause I really wanted to cherish the connection we had. But now I can't see it anymore. I wish I didn't break no contact, and lived through the pain since the first day. Now I've lost him, my self-respect dignity and my love for him too.

I (27 F) have been with my boyfriend (28 M) for 3 years now. I got a message from a girl that he used to hook up with, that he had been messaging her things of a sexual nature. At the end of the relationship I had not been very happy and was not getting things I needed from him and was having my doubts. While it hurts so bad that he did that, I am thankful it happened because I dont know if I would have had the nerve to end things with him. Some guys had caught my eye while I was in my relationship, but I would never have acted on it. All that being said: I am handling it pretty well. I was sort of clocked out of the relationship already. How soon is too soon to start dating again? Not anytime soon, but I do not think I need 3 months to heal from this. Any additional advice?

It finally happened. My girlfriend of three years broke up with me. About a month ago, she suggested that we break up. I fought her on it and managed to prevent it from happening at the time. Over the next few weeks, we continued to message each other, but she would blow hot and cold. Some days, she’d be willing to talk and share pictures with me like everything was normal, and other days, she would completely ignore me.

Then, 40 minutes ago, she finally said she feels like we shouldn’t continue with the relationship anymore. I just replied, 'OK, and I wish you the best.'

I really love her, I want her more than anything. We spent the last three years doing everything together and no its all come to an end. I want her back and I don't know what to do.

My bf of 10 months broke up with me last night. This happened less than 24hrs of being intimate. He told me he was having a bad day at work. That he wanted to quit his job. I said I support his decision whatever he does. Didn’t hear back, so I texted that evening and asked if he was OK. Thats when he called me on the phone. He told me that he didn’t enjoy our time together when he came over . When we were going for intimacy, I was grabbing the condom as usual and he told me he didn’t want to use one. I fought for a second and then we ended up not using one which we do sometimes. When we were on the phone and he was breaking up, he was acting totally disgusted with the idea of me having a baby. He was demanding to know when my period was. He told me that he doesn’t wanna be with me. I’m disappointed that I’ve been in a relationship with someone who hates me so much. He even told me that the relationship was causing him so much stress that he was going to go off quit his job & do drugs. I told him that I was worried about him. That I was going to contact his family. But I don’t have their information. But he did text me to stop contacting him. I care about him, but at this point, I guess he can make his own decision on if he’s gonna screw himself over or not..

My girlfriend and I have been together for around 3–4 years.
This is difficult to write because I genuinely don’t think she’s a bad person. She’s kind, and I don’t want this post to become about blaming her.
Lately, though, I’ve been wondering if I’ve spent years overlooking my own needs in the name of being understanding.
I honestly can’t remember the last time we had a real heart-to-heart conversation. Most of our communication is just exchanging updates on WhatsApp. I’m almost always the one who calls. She rarely calls me first. Whenever I try to bring up relationship issues, the conversation usually doesn’t go very far, or it gets avoided altogether.
When we meet in person, we laugh, spend time together, and generally have a nice day. But when I think about what a life partner means to me, I feel like something important is missing.
It’s not about gifts, dates, or even shared hobbies.
It’s about emotional connection.
I want to feel like my partner wants to know what’s going on in my head, wants to have difficult conversations, and wants to be there emotionally when life gets hard. Instead, I often feel like I’m carrying that side of the relationship alone.
Something else I’ve realized is that I’ve never really had someone I could lean on emotionally—not growing up, not even now. I honestly can’t remember the last time someone genuinely asked me how I was doing and stayed to hear the answer. Maybe because of that, I expected my relationship to become that safe place.
I also know I’m not perfect. I have my own flaws. I overthink. I can be idealistic. I’ve probably made mistakes too. I’m not writing this because I think I’m the perfect boyfriend.
What I’m struggling with is this:
Am I expecting too much from a long-term relationship?
Is it normal for emotional intimacy to fade after a few years, or have I been ignoring a fundamental incompatibility because I loved the idea of our future together?
I still care about her deeply, which is what makes this so painful. I don’t want to leave someone who’s genuinely a good person. But I also don’t know if it’s fair to either of us to ignore how lonely I’ve been feeling.

Any thoughts? TIA

my ex (M18) broke up with me (F19) 3 days ago over text, we had broken up the day before i found out i was pregnant, but he told me he was going to stay with me and that we were going to be a family, this was 3 weeks ago, on friday he broke up with me and now is acting so mean, he refuses to speak to me, like we weren’t in love on thursday, im really depressed and i want him to come back, i like to think that he is just immature and that he is going to regret his decisions sooner or later

just to clarify, i didnt ask him to say with me when i found out i was pregnant, i even told him that we could be our separate ways, but he offered himself and started talking about moving together

we fought a few days ago and have not been talking since - this might just be the biggest one we've ever had, and i've even had the thought of breaking up. we came back apologizing, and i reassured him that i will never leave him and more sweet talking like so.

however, in my heart i still have that weight, and i feel like i am not the same person before this anymore. this time i actually feel like i want to give up. now i feel very bad because it just looks like i am leading him on now. i am currently spending time with him, and seeing him having fun with me just kills me even more.

i just want to ask if i am actually a messed up asshole if i text him i want to break up on the same day we just fought and gave each other reassurance. i literally can not tolerate this anymore as i know things like this will happen again like any other fights we had before, and who knows if we will ever get better from this.