This is a conversation I had with a representative at Michigan Rehabilitative Services.

I was very on edge, as I am with most social interactions, and it was taking me a long time to figure out what was appropriate to ask/divulge and what wasn't. She gave me an ellipsis and I got defensive. I think I made her upset.

What could I have done differently, and what should I do now?

my boyfriend and i included LOL. so i want to open up a poll !! which do you prefer? cats or dogs?

I'm asking out of curiosity since I'm not an adult yet, but I don't feel like I changed much from when I was younger. I often get really confused when people say I look older than my actual age due to my height and mustache, cuz to me I feel the exact same way as I felt like when I was 10.

Anyway, I was wondering if it gets any better as an adult. You can interpret what I mean however you like since I don't know what you struggled with back then, but I'm also asking about things like the feeling of loneliness and not belonging anywhere.

Did you get better at regulating your emotions, expressing yourself, etc?

Housing worker argued with me today why im not taking medication for autism if its a barrier in my life. I swear this lady is impossible. Telling her its the way my brain is wired and you dont medicate it like that, she told me all her other autistic clients shes dealt with are medicated for autism and ive about had it please tell me Im not going crazy here.

Note: I have to work with her because im in a program and would be homeless otherwise, and ive given up reporting people because of so much retaliation in my past from workers I just don't have the energy for it

I got my routine cards made specifically for me (even the icons are pink because I love pink) and my emotions cards I got to pick images for the ones that didn’t already have an icon so I picked pictures of animals!

For me, going to the movies alone. I found it to be a good excuse to get away from people for a bit, which is something in my opinion all autistics need. Besides, isn't the rule supposed to be you must be quiet? Like, I don't need another person for that, anyway.

i’m on vacation right now with my family and partner and we’ve been going to a lot of really overwhelming places which i don’t really mind so long as i can have some space when i need it. the issue is that i’m not always able to leave a situation immediately (say for instance, eating out at a restaurant) and i’ve been getting really overstimulated really fast and i keep snapping at my partner when he tries to help. when i’m overstimulated i tend to go into verbal shutdown but the issue is that everyone that wants to help will always start by asking a mirage if questions, and usually when i don’t answer they can get upset (not my partner, he understands verbal shutdown, but he does still seem to ask questions, no matter how many times i’ve told him that asking me questions sort of just makes the situation worse for me. though he is getting better) so i usually end up pushing myself to answer the questions anyway. after a while i tend to start snapping at people over very little or simple things and i can’t seem to control it. i always feel so bad afterwards but it’s almost like the more i try and control it when i’m already overstimulated the worse it gets.
i just feel really bad cause i’ve snapped at my partner a lot over this vacation because i’ve essentially enter a permanent state of overstimulation until i get back home and i just feel so awful about it.
does this happen to any of y’all? if so is there anything you can do to help prevent it? or is this just something i’m gonna have to be continually apologizing for? i try and let people know before i get to that point that if i do snap, that it’s not personal, but getting snapped at sucks, and it can be hard not to take it personally. i just don’t know what to do, i feel so bad.

i’ve also thought about getting cards that i can wear in a lanyard that i can point to when im overstimulated but i find that even when i’m using my phone to communicate i can still get a little snippy.

I've met a handful unfortunately. Not saying ableist neurotypical people are any better, but I find it bizarre how the ableist autistic people I met are aware of our struggles and they choose to be that way.

Reason for posting this is because I got wildly misinterpreted by a person like that even though I am always careful with my words as an autistic fem person/woman to be clear, not be misinterpreted and no offend anyone. Said person used the r slur.

I've also had plenty of experiences of ableist autistic people who used the r slur the exact way it is used in a derogatory way and when I calmly explained that that's not how reclamation works, I got jumped for it.

I'm tired how everyone buys into fascism and online spaces have increasingly worsened. I'm 22, so maybe it's also that I haven't experienced the old web, or maybe I became more aware idk.

I don’t know if this is an autism thing or a me thing. In my free time I can stare at a picture or replay a small video for up to 40/50 mins or even longer.
I think the longest I’ve looked at something is like two hours.

It sounds weird but let me explain a bit more. I have some special interests (as one has) and I save a lot of pictures on my phone. I can keep looking at a picture and it keeps giving me dopamine. I also have things in my room that I can stare at for hours.

Also the art I make. I love making digital art and I always spend so long staring at what I made. I also love staring at like small animations or other digital art. Is this a usual thing? Does anyone else do this?

every time i remember i have autism, i always feel upset by it. i’m trying to change this mindset, what are some positives i can think of instead?

Lol, this is why I never hike with people, never doing this shit again.

does anyone else feel like they got the « bad » autism?

I’m not a prodigy at anything. I just have terrible social timing on top of my below-average intellect. My cousin—who also has autism—represents my country in international mathematics olympiads, and got a 1500 on the SAT without even speaking English. It’s fine for him to have no social skills, because his intelligence compensates for it. What do I have? Does anyone else feel like this? Like they’re just disadvantage? Born merely with no purpose.

That's too hard, especially since I'm in an autistic burnout for months...

I go out of my bedroom for 30 minutes, and I'm already overwhelmed.

I can't handle light or people.

I can't do anything. I'm stuck in the dark, waiting for I don't even know what.

This is not a life.

I'm at my parents' house, and I can't work or do outside activities. Cleaning my bedroom is already too much.

It's been months, and my regression is really bad.

I do everything I can to feel better: I rest, take care of myself, and even accept medication. I have a supportive family.

But even with everything going right, my life is hell.

And I will be fucking autistic all my life! That's a hell

I feel like everyone thinks I make excuses and I’m someone who just isn’t trying hard enough to do things correctly and I flip out and melt down when it happens. Tone and outward thinking especially are issues. Am I the asshole? I don’t want to cause problems for others or be so self involved in my own world that I come across as not caring about anything other than myself.

I have a few close friends who will come to me for their problems. I'll sit down and listen to their conversation about what's troubling them to vent. However, I really tend to struggle with it afterward, because it feels like from my perspective, they have dumped their problems on me. As a result, it feels as if I'm living in it, having to figure it out. It's led to arguments and people not wanting to talk to me in the past, because I'll bring it up again what they vented, and then they don't want to talk about it anymore. I just really feel overwhelmed.

33M I’m high functioning or I was at some point, I feel like I’m being “normal” in public, but today I was looking at the wine list at a restaurant and the waitress told me no the drinks are on another page and started paging my menu for me. With that air of you poor disabled man. I tried to make a joke but my sister who was with me just gave me a disgusted look like she hates being seen with me. I was ok but now hours later I hate my life, not being able to mask better, or how I used to. Being treated like a child but feeling like my calm intelligent real brain is trapped inside myself when in social settings. Being straight up ignored by people, like they’re not going to waste their time greeting me, but I’m considered rude? I just understand the life expectancy rumour of 34 more and more. I can’t keep living like this.

This is my very first post of this community, you guys can see it as an introduction or a rant post idk, depends on you.

I'm now a foundation college student, got stress on study (I hate the writing and research skill!!!!!!) but got more stress on making relationship with friends and lecturer (especially the impatience and easily angry one, so scary). Not long ago, the school just settled a girl who bullied me on discord, but now she still making trouble to me on doing the group assignment, she did nothing and I have to carry myself with my other teammates.

On the other subject group assignment, due to the subject is too difficult and I do very little in the report and presentation slides, and I am always suspicious on myself and afraid that I am the "free rider" on their thoughts. Even thought, our final presentation were completed just now.

On the relationship, I have joined a friend group, but as expected, I am somehow hard to make a long conversation with them. Because...... Lack of things that able to discuss with them.

Well that's gone too far from the topic, as a guy who live in domestic violence family (it's normal in Asian family, and I am part of them, too, lol) and can even reached to get a good grade (even thought is not that great) to be a college student. That's what I felt somewhat glad about, because I can do things that normal people can do, somehow.

I am not going to write more, or the paragraph is too long and not everyone wants to read, so yeah

So I recently was diagnosed im 33 high masking , ive always clicked my teeth and looped songs and shook my leg, I also play drums which may have seconded as a hand flapping outlet in some ways. But last night, I was on the cusp of like a rabbit hole of rumination of rejection dysphoria, and spinning out, and worrying about being a freak ( something like this happened 2 years ago and i was insanely depressed for like 6 months) out of nowhere i like got out of my seat and stimmed HARDCORE for like 30 seconds, walking in circles flapping my hands swaying on my toes and i was intensely focused on it. it was like something my body HAD to do, and the only way i can describe it is that it almost felt euphoric. and i swear it was like magic, once it was over I immediately settled down. and those really shitty thoughts dwindled into nothing. It was so strange like i KNEW what i was doing knew it looked weird (luckily i was alone) but i had no control over it and it was it felt SO GOOD (like not in a weird way but like (this feels natural way)) Its so strange though cause ive never done that before and ive never had those really shitty feelings just dissolve like that. it was fucking amazing, all those years of falling into these spirals and all i should have been doing was stimming a bit. It's such a weird shocking unusual thing. I'm still kind of in disbelief how quickly that crash out i KNEW was coming just popped out of existence. Any way thank you for coming to my TED talk

I’m in another sub and I’m getting a jumped on because I’m asking a simple question to not ask the poster about what caused their trauma. If they wanted to share, they would volunteer that. I don’t understand what’s hard about that. The comment I responded to said they didn’t understand how someone from a stable family could have trauma and where did the trauma came from? I just think that question is wildly inappropriate because even without asking gruesome details just asking someone hey how are you? Traumatized is kind of fucked up. Am I wrong? I wasn’t mean about it. All I simply said was that question is not respectful and they do not owe you that information that’s it and yet people are attacking me for it.

Lately, I’ve had so many changes happening in my life; I graduated high school, got a nearly full-ride scholarship for nursing school, and got my first “real” job at a hospital in town.

All that makes this post feel somewhat trivial, but I ate a salad for the first time tonight. Not just smelling it, or taking one bite so I can say I tried it, an actual legitimate serving size of Caesar salad. I’ve struggled with food my entire life, literally since I began eating solid foods, so I feel absolutely amazing right now. I’m also the only autistic person in my immediate family, and while they’re very supportive, there’s times like this where I’m reminded that they don’t really get how big this feels for me. So I thought I’d try sharing this here.

Tell me if you guys have had any success stories of overcoming restrictive eating and sensory avoidance!

(Also, please excuse the half eaten plate of food, I got very excited.)

For starters, I'm a 25 year old autistic man, but has anyone else here had little to no interests or hobbies as a kid, but now have a lot of interests and hobbies as an adult? Because I was one of those people, and it's one of those reasons why I prefer being an adult more than a kid. Granted, I still live with my parents, but it's also hard for me to find any jobs, especially since I'm interested in learning pretty much anything. Plus, I've also been less nervous around a lot of people, which was the biggest help for me to overcome my struggles.

i was so upset and crying lots doing lots of biting and hitting and now i feel icky, what does everyone here do after meltdowns?

My hyperfixations are sometimes on other things but most of the time they are fixed onto my special interest. I will fix onto characters and only think about them for months. The issue is that when hyperfixed onto this character if I come into content about this character, or even just a photo of them it causes me to freak out. I then have to regulate myself over this usually by rocking or throwing my hands about. But usually I just have to stop interacting with photos of said character because it is so almost stressful and overwhelming and I cannot deal with it

I do not want to stop interacting with certain characters because I am obsessing over them. I obviously want to think about them. Does anyone else know what I mean by this? Does anyone have any tips on calming myself down enough to not freak out about them? I cannot regulate myself. I thought making merch about the characters I'm freaking out over and now I just have a physical object to stare at and freak out over. It's very tiring, stressful and freaking me out. I need to be able to be calm enough to just love my media but I'm not good at regulation

People treat me like I am a lot younger than I am. And, I am very smart and got a 1360 on the SAT.. but they sort of treat me like I am a little slow too because I can be ditsy. I have noticed people start off talking to me one way and then after a few conversations switch to a different way, I think it is something in my mannerisms but I don't know how to fix it. I have had one girlfriend before and she was autistic and I think very smart, she was in law school and knew a million facts and 3 languages. But we broke up because she moved to Kansas. Now I think the odds of finding someone else who is autistic, smart and also attracted to another woman are low low low.. because most people if they are not autistic won't date someone who is, maybe because they feel uncomfortable like how you wouldn't date someone with down syndrome b/c of intellectual capabilities (even though I am smart). How do I find others like me? Just hinge?