And I don't necessarily mean, rejecting someone and then regretting it 2 weeks later. I mean, let's say you reject a guy when they're 20 for being immature, and then you come across that person again at 30, and they've got a family, 2 kids, and are a completely serious person. It's like, OK, I rejected you for being immature, but after hitting rock bottom and being homeless, and then starting from the ground up, going to work everyday and then having kids and enduring life's various hardships, you grew up. But you were immature with me at the time, so how was I supposed to bet that you would grow up?

Note: I can't change the title to be "Intact Penises and Sex" or I would, sorry for the poor choice of words.

This post is going to be a bunch of TMI.

My new partner has an intact penis. I tend to get a lot of natural lubrication. We had intercourse for the first time last night and I'm wondering if my experience is normal. I felt hardly any friction at all and it's the first time in my life I felt "loose" (yes I know this isn't a real thing, leave me alone about my own feelings) so to speak. I actually got up halfway through and wiped myself up completely dry with a towel since the condom was drenched in it already. There was still so little of that "filled up" feeling, just gliding in and out with little resistance. We ended up having sex a second time later without a condom - you can judge me, we got caught up in on the moment and both agreed it was stupid even though we are exclusive - and it definitely felt better, but still just very slippery. My guy doesn't have a huge penis, but it's also not small - definitely above the average.

I will say that I also felt very safe and very turned on by this man. He takes his time with foreplay and I definitely was fully ready by the time intercourse began. I've developed feelings for him so it's a little more than just sex to me. We were both nervous and I'm sure a bit of mental anxiety contributed to everything as well.

My question... Is this a normal difference from circumcised penises and if so what strategies could I use to give more friction or help with the feeling of being stretched? We can and have definitely used other means to get me off, but I'm worried about this affecting our relationship and hoping there are some solutions.

I’m the receptionist at my office, and I have a bowl of Andes Mints on my desk. I’ve lost count of how many times women in the office, usually the 40 and up crowd, have told me “those would be so dangerous for me if I were you” or how they’re “going to be bad” by eating one, etc. I know the simple answer is diet culture, but you don’t need to declare some sort of act of contrition for eating a piece of chocolate!

Hello! I (28f) just got married to my long-term partner (26m) back in May. Yesterday, we found out that I was pregnant. Parenthood is something that we are both excited for but we weren't planning on it happening so soon. As soon as I found out, I immediately called the abortion intake line and booked an appointment for August 5th. However, within hours of making this decision, I was feeling incredibly emotional about it. I want to be a mom so bad, but I also know that we aren't in the best situation right now. While we are both financially stable and working in good jobs, we are also trying to save for a house which hasn't been easy due to how expensive houses in our city are. We both come from good families, so having no support is not a concern for us. I think housing is our biggest challenge as we would like to have our own home to raise a child in. I was also considering going back for my master's degree, but I have a lot of student loan debt and I'm unsure whether I want to add even more to that. I feel like I will really regret having an abortion, but I'm also really scared of having a child and feeling like I can't give them a good quality of life. I'm already really attached to the idea that I'm pregnant and it breaks my heart every time I think about how it's only temporary. It's the only thing I can think about right now.

Has anyone else had these same emotions and still went through with an abortion? If so, how did you feel afterwards? Any regrets?

Edit* Thank you to all who responded and provided your view. It was really eye opening and I'm taking some time to refocus on myself and my studies. And probably a job change.

I always see fantastic advice here from many wonderful women, and find myself in need of some honesty and help tonight. I (F26) met my boyfriend (23M) in September last year at work. Yes, I know, it's not clever to date coworkers but we had amazing chemistry off the bat and decided to go for it because we had enough role separation and didn’t work directly together in this fairly small firm. We became officially boyfriend/girlfriend on New Years Eve and exclusive in early November. It was wonderful and magnetic and I loved him. And he loved me.

In February this year, my boyfriend paid for my flight to another city because he was sent there to work for 3 months. He was visiting every two weeks but while we were keeping things very private at work. This is where the incident happened. On the flight, a guy sitting next to me started chatting. I really preferred a quiet flight but didn’t want to be rude so spoke to him a bit. We ended up talking about work/travels/food etc and it was a decent conversation, he seemed nice. I didn’t mention I had a boyfriend, not because I was avoiding it, but the conversation never found its way there. Mistake #1. He then started showing some interest in a romantic sense which threw me off towards the plane landing because why can’t men just have a nice conversation. He starts saying shit like “oh my god, you’re perfect/ideal” and I immediately feel awkward and put off. He then pushes for my number with his phone out as he was going to type it in and call immediately to make sure I didn’t give him a fake. I froze up and stammered “ haha ummm I don’t think so” but wasn’t assertive enough and he pushed and said “I don’t care if you’re going to see a guy or whoever, I want to see you please”. I felt cornered. It wasn’t the first time the boyfriend excuse wasn’t accepted by a man so I did what I’d done in the past when literally frozen. I gave my number (which he immediately called, watching to see me add his contact) fully expecting to delete it later and never see this clown again. Mistake # 2. I get off the plane, and I go to my boyfriend.

I told him about the plane thing in passing that night when I was very sleepy in bed but hadn’t mentioned the number. That guy messages me the next day or so (I had forgotten about him) and I start to respond to reject then forget about it and do something else. I politely reject him and delete/block the number after getting back to my phone. When I got back home after a few days my boyfriend messaged me asking me to tell him the full truth about the plane. He said he felt betrayed and lied to because he saw the guy's name on my phone, I had not said I had a boyfriend, and that I had begun to type a message (he had picked up my phone and was going through it I presume while I was in another room). I explained I felt awkward and just gave it to him with the intention to delete it later. I lied by omission here by not frankly telling him the full truth while I was with him. Mistake # 3. I got a bit defensive and very apologetic all in the same breath because he called me a betrayer and he had run to his sister before speaking to me who called me a cheater for the incident. I really felt he was going to end things. We talked a lot, I apologise more, I try to get him to understand I had zero intent to cheat but lack of being fully honest was wrong, and I should have been super clear I had a boyfriend. I said I would never do it again. I give him space and I tell him to take it, and think about if he really wants the relationship going forward. He decides he does but things started going downhill after this.

We go overseas for a holiday the next month and have an incident where he was extremely drunk and slapped me across the face. When I asked if he treated any of his exes this way he said “no because they didn’t deserve it”. I felt awful, he didn’t look after me when I was sick from the alcohol and I had a panic attack. The biggest in 8 years. The slap didn’t leave a mark, it just shocked me. That hurt my trust in him. Maybe deep down, I felt I did deserve it. I also saw on that trip that he had kept naked/revealing photos of previous women on his phone that he said he forgot to delete and never looked at. I deleted a bunch of them and told him to clear his phone of all other women because it was disrespectful.

After this, the next 4 months, we had constant arguments in the middle of some great moments. He became hyper aware of my phone activity (I showed him everything to try to build trust), of which male coworker I spoke to and for how many minutes, of my online status (i.e. online but didn’t open his message), of exactly where I was at all times when out with girlfriends, double standards came up where he was able to be out late (he’d be mad at me) with friends or speak to female coworkers/go for lunch/play games (restrictions for me). It became draining and I was constantly made out to be in the wrong, I always felt in the wrong too, I was always apologizing, always messing up. I couldn’t recover and smile the next day after a fight and one day he said I was just “mean, and would be a horrible friend and I had a horrid face” when I’d see him and not smile because I was down. I was screwing up constantly for breathing wrong and he’d flat out call me a liar at times, questioning my intent. My brother noticed me crying a lot more - I never used to. I couldn’t focus on my work, and my study began to suffer immensely. I had some female coworkers (by a month ago they all found out at work) tell me I could do better, ask if he was the controlling type, showed surprise I went for him, another guy said my boyfriend could be a little more mature. I wondered if I was missing things in the middle of all the toxicity that had formed.

The last few days he pulled back (we have had a lot of miscommunications) and essentially I thought we were broken up because he unfollowed me on socials, didn’t speak to me/text me for a few days and this was after another argument and another conversation of me telling him I loved him and wanted this to work. He brought up the plane incident and said his trust was broken and he didn’t think it could be rebuilt. Tonight, we finally talk and it all comes back to two moments; the plane incident for him, and the slap for me that shook our trust in each other and made us extremely defensive. We should have ended it then. We didn’t know it would have ended up this way. We said we loved each other and he pulled me in for a hug and said he was sorry and that he loved me, he didn’t hate me and he wished for this to work. He said he wanted me and wanted us but not like this, the ways we'd become. We reached a point where we were not even who we each fell in love with. It was heartbreaking but the clarity was good. I said maybe in another life and asked if it was the end forever. He thought for a moment and said he wasn’t sure. We kissed and hugged again and there was a sense of peace at finally bringing it all out.

So, how badly did I mess this up and was everything that came after my fault completely, or did he treat me poorly as well? I told him, he treated me so badly after. I tried everything to make it up to him, I was as open as I could though sometimes being monitored like that hurt and made me defensive myself after seeing things on his phone he kept from me (double standard). I cooked, I bought him gifts, I tried to shower him with love the best I could and I was getting peanuts in return. How badly did I fuck up? Was there anything else I could have done besides totally mishandling that idiot on the plane? What do you think the severity of my mistake was? Was it cheating? Is there any hope for reconciliation?

I’m sorry this is so long, and if you got this far, thank you. I welcome all of your advice and comments.

I have no one else to tell this to. my boyfriend (16M) and I (17f) have been together for 3 months and we’ve been sexually active for around a month. We’re each others first everything. I’ve never came. Recently I found a toy which I know could make me finish though, and we agreed he’d use it on me for my first time finishing.

He came over but I became really nervous and scared to do it. The original plan was we wouldn’t have sex and we’d just focus on my pleasure, but tbh I purposefully chose to have sex because I thought it would make him forget about the toy and we could move on.

He didn’t forget though and afterwards he told me to go get it, I shook my head and that was when he realised I was nervous. He told me we could go at my pace, and he just held me and kept kissing me and telling me it was okay. After like 10 minutes I got the toy and we laid down for another 20 minutes before I was ready to use it.

The whole time he was telling me to take my time and that we can lay there all day if I want to. When I was ready, it felt really good, I didn’t finish because it was taking too long and I got frustrated but afterwards we had sex again and then he brushed my hair and held me.

I wanted to post this because I don’t have anyone else to talk to about how grateful I am to have met someone like him at such a young age. I know so many people have such horrible experiences and I’m just so grateful for him

hi i’m terrified of putting this out there and to be honest i don’t know that it was assault sometimes i think it was and sometimes i think he was just drunk and being friendly but it’s been 2 years and i can’t stop thinking about it so i just need some perspective since im too scared to tell anyone in real life. this happened when i was 18f. he was 24m. it was thanksgiving night he was my older brothers best friend who i had known since i was 13.he was like an older brother to me but i want to clarify we had never been touchy, never hugged or anything not even shook hands before. we simply did not have that kind of relationship and only really spoke on holidays. everyone had either gone to sleep or gone home and it was just me and him. i was cleaning up the kitchen and he joined in to help. he was definitely drunk, not blackout tho. we got to talking like we normally did nothing weird. i then went to do dishes so i turned away from him so i was facing away from him. then he says to me that my spine looked crooked. mind you i know for a fact it’s not.i laughed it off and went back to doing dishes. he came up to me and without asking started touching my lower back and feeling my spine. i was wearing a cropped tank top and short shorts so it was easy to see my back but i still remember that he pulled up my top a few inches so he could see better. then he crouched down a little to get a better view since he was like 1ft taller than me and grabbed my waist and wasn’t saying anything. i remember trying to turn around to face him and i kept trying to move away and brush it off. but he just kept grabbing my waist and feeling up and down my back. the whole thing was less than a minute but eventually he just took his hands off and i changed the subject. after that the whole mood shifted. i finished cleaning as fast as possible and went to bed. i felt so strange and didn’t even want to tell my bf at the time since it felt like cheating for some reason. and so i never told anyone. he ended up moving away very suddenly a few months after and about a year later we found out he had gone to jail for sexually assaulting a teenage girl. all the thoughts of that night came back to me and i honestly lost sleep thinking that he had thought of me like that. so here i am many months later still trying to figure it all out. i need honest opinions i can’t keep going back and forth on this,thank you and any advice is appreciated.

uhmmn I'm not good at these things. but lately I've been feeling pushed by him to do things. granted they are benefitial things but it feels weird having someone not only give advice but hold me accountable. but i feel its a bit bordering control. i do think he has good intentions but idk.

some things that come to mind that make me question this is:

1. i tell him i dont rlly believe in gender for myself and i prefer myself with androgynous styles. i showed him pics of before we met and dated when i was masc leaning and i also tell him i dont rlly like how i look now. and he says that he likes me as i am now and not to change and tells me to wear the fit i was wearing to this event we have planned next week.

2. he checks my cycle app before we have sex to make sure im not ovulating (i have an iud) and asks me to take occasional pregnancy tests and he'll supply them. when i brought up that it makes me feel weird and i didnt think i needed to, he told me i didnt have to do it, but said itd be smart to and then compared to it to checking car fluids :/ which looking back now i think was dumb

3.a bit weird but, he holds my cup as i drink from it. he says he does it because he thinks it chivalrous. i kinda like it despite the oddness of it but also raises some flags

1. he wants to go with me to start a savings account (which yeah i need to do)

2. he wants me to volunteer at a hospital for career purposes and gave me numbers to call. since i met him he's been really pushing the idea that i should get into healthcare. i really don't want to do it honestly i never had an interest. i want to do something career wise but im the type that has to be interested in something to really excel at it and it sounds overstimulating to me. i went to college for fine arts but dropped out for reasons even though i had a scholarship. ive been considering going back to school and have been thinking abt majoring in it again but he told me thats financial suicide and not to do it and to proceed with healthcare. says that pursuing passions as a career is not a good idea and that i should find something i can tolerate to fund my hobbies n lifestyles.

3. I'm trying to lose weight. i was put on medications to treat BED n i have lost weight. I'm also supposed to be eating healthier but a lot of the times i don't but i still remain in my cal deficit. when food becomes a topic and i tell him what i ate or have he says "are you supposed to be eating that?" which makes me feel weird

well that's all that comes to mind for now. i rlly do think he has good intentions but i don't think some of this is the path for me. are these behaviors considered controlling or is he just holding me accountable??? this is my first relationship and im not the best at looking for these things. i was rlly bothered by the gender stuff n got a haircut in a style i like.

are there other things i should be looking out for? are there any subtle signs i should be looking for? or obvious ones? pls don't judge me

was this okay? am i being overly sensitive and dramatic? when i was 13 i accidentally spilled boiling hot tea on my lap. so i had second degree burns on my upper and inner thighs as well as some on my labia. at maybe the 3rd hospital visit for my burn treatment, a male doctor suddenly came in and looked at and touched very very close to my private part (like touched the areas where my underwear was) and i think asked if it hurt and then just stood there talking with the nurses and left. i was in my underwear and very uncomfortable. i wasn’t expecting it and no one asked if i was okay with having a man look around my intimate area. it felt so unnecessary for him specifically to do it. obviously my female nurses were in the room, but i still felt uneasy. i didn’t want him to inspect my burns, let alone touch my underwear. the next visit, my nurses asked if i preferred a woman and i said yes. but they didn’t ask me the first time. am i just being sensitive and dramatic?

tell me everything i should know and what should i do😭😔. genuinely my first time going on a date and i have no idea what to do. WHAT SHOULD I TALK ABOUT??? HOW CAN I NOT BE AWKWARD?? SHOULD I LET HIM PAY OR SPLIT??

ALSO WHAT SHOULD I WEAR??

CAN I HOLD HANDS??

IM SO CONFUSED AND SCARED AND EXCITED HELP ME OUT

lil tmi ive known this guy for more than a year and now going to meet him before i leave for college.

(also im aware of the current state of this country and collectively support all the students so pls do not come at me lol)

I had been talking to a guy for about 3 months. Things were only difficult because he didn’t know if his circumstances would allow him to date, but things felt like they were changing. When we did hangout, I felt safe and respected. He was kind and funny and I was really attracted to him.

This past weekend I asked about having a more physically intimate relationship as we had never had sex. He got incredibly defensive really quickly and dumped me. I won’t post everything but it was him just saying that my view of him is a “lie” and he even called himself pathetic. He told me in all of the sort of commotion over text that I don’t actually wanna be with him, that he doesn’t have anyone else that he’s thinking about being with because nobody has ever wanted to be with him, and that I’m making this way harder than it needs to be by not just bursting the bubble I have of him in my head.

What the fuck? Where did this come from? He is quiet, reserved and kind and I can’t even imagine him talking of anyone else the way he talks of himself. Obviously, a relationship with someone who views themselves like that isn’t healthy but this has thrown me for a loop.

I’ve been reading a lot of experiences lately and people have said that they experience multiple orgasms in a row. I have never experienced more than one in a 10 minute span of time. I need to take a break and have the feeling build up and then I can experience another orgasm. However, I was always under the impression that the spasms I feel (10-15 in quick succession) are all entirely one orgasm. Or am I incorrect and I am actually orgasming 10-15 times in a row?

If it helps, I have never experienced a penetrative orgasm and can only orgasm from a vibrator or my own fingers stimulating my clitoris.

I can't get over the perfection that is Henry Cavill

Im not gonna waste time going into all the backstory, but I (20sF) found out my lil brother (early 20sM) doesnt think sexism is real against women. We had a massive argument because I said women get r*ped more than men, and he said no they dont, because the statistics are skewed and men dont report... I agreed men underreport r*pe, but he literally told me that "nobody can know either way," and said grooming gangs of women are real (but would not show me even one example...)

He then, not kidding, told me that male suicide rates ARE provable because "when someone dies, its recorded, no matter what" and that proves there is sexism against males, not females...

Guys, wtf do i do??? I thought he was a good person, he was assaulted as a child and even admitted a few years ago that despite that he understands women are at a greater advantage for harm, but now he thinks like this... i dont know what to do. Ive just been avoiding any sex based conversation with him but it disturbs me deeply that he says these things.

He also says other offensive things now, like "making money is easy" and because of that all homeless people are just lazy. Also of course other terrible sexist things. I love him a lot but i feel distraught and lost respect for him. Again wont go into details but i spent a lot of my life trying to protect him

Idk what to do, does anyone else have similar experience or words of wisdom? I feel sick lately.

Hey all! I’ve never posted on here before (28 FTM), but I thought I’d share some anecdotal tips about how I deal with things when I feel a UTI coming on as someone with a vulva and a short urethra.

I’ve been on HRT for about a year now, and the change in my hormones is causing some vaginal dryness/atrophy, which means I, who was already prone to UTIs, will probably need to look out for them even more. I’m pretty sensitive & aware of my body’s signals, so as SOON as I feel a little weird down there (urgency to pee, slight discomfort while urinaring), I start doing these 2 things:

1. Drink as much water as I can. Chug that shit. I drink as much as I can until it goes through me and I can pee a good big pee at least THREE times to flush out my urethra. The more big pisses the better.
2. Take off my underwear and pants and sleep for the night without anything trapping moisture or warmth down there.

And that’s it. Obviously I’m not a doctor or expert of any kind, but pretty much every time I’ve caught the early symptoms of a UTI and done these things, my symptoms disappear by the next morning. I’ve done this before a flight when I felt a UTI coming on (unfortunately I drank so much water and had to hold my pee which was so painful), but after I was able to pee it all out, the symptoms subsided. Last night, I had a sudden feeling that things were off down there, & this morning I feel normal after peeing it out and airing it out.

(edit: I should probably add the disclaimer that this hasn't solved all of my UTIs in the past of course, but I've had enough experience with them to know the signs of when the environment of my nether regions seems like it could go there. This is just my advice for getting things in a better place so the UTI is prevented! Obviously once real symptoms arise, a call to the doctor must happen immediately.)

And apparently women need to get punched in the face to not spray “dAngErOuS cHemIcAls” in someone’s face, because women can only learn through violence! And that’s funny and reasonable to dozens of men!

I really need to mute any of the popular video subreddits. wtf. A woman pulls a bad prank and shes an abusive harpy and people are pulling up the chemical makeup of silly string to prove that what she did was over the line (she sprayed silly string at her husband and had her young son throw a water balloon).

I’ve seen pranks that dudes have pulled on their partners that could get them horribly hurt, and when their partners is angry after they “cant take a joke” “it was funny though!” “Nobody got hurt”

I think pranks are only funny to most people if women are getting scared or otherwise harmed. Women pulling pranks on men is almost always called abusive.

I have been sprayed in the face with silly string; I fucking lived. Maybe men just have more sensitive constitutions and can’t handle such simple things? Idk. I’m pissed off, and nobody deserves to be fucking punched for any god damn reason, and certainly not for playing a harmless if annoying prank on their husband with the help of their kid.

Men will find any fucking reason to justify violence against women.

this is a little bit of a rant post but as a girl it seriously overwhelms me seeing how aggressive beauty standards are nowadays for girls, with the whole “types of beauty” and obsessions with every minuscule part of our bodies. the whole looksmaxxing trend was definitely the downfall because I just find it so sad to see people my age fall into something like this, I sometimes fall for it too

I know that this is nothing new, beauty standards have always existed, especially for girls, but I sometimes can’t help but overanalyze every shadow and mark on my face.

So I just wanted some advice on how you girls deal with such beauty standards! I think it’ll make me learn something

Hi everyone,

I’m posting here because I really need a safe space to vent and get some perspective from women who might have dealt with a similar situation.

Recently, I’ve been feeling really uncomfortable around a male colleague at work. While he hasn't physically touched me, he constantly stares inappropriate places, particularly my chest, while talking to me or working near me. It’s gotten to the point where even a few other colleagues have noticed it happening and brought it up to me.

It makes me feel incredibly self-conscious, tense, and distracted at work. I haven't involved management or HR, but I'm trying to figure out how to manage this day-to-day on my own level.

For those who have faced this kind of passive, boundary-crossing behavior—how did you deal with it? Did you address it directly with the person, use body language cues, or handle it differently? I'd love to hear how you protected your peace and confidence in the office.

Thank you so much for reading and for being such a supportive space. ❤️

Seriously. I feel like I can’t even have a normal conversation with a man on here nowadays. And, god forbid, you do decide to flirt a little… opens the floodgates. Anyone else experience this??

1. Not pregnant. Took a test - negative, on continuous birth control to stop periods, haven't had a period in 10 years.

Ever since last week my gag reflex has gone from kinda sensitive to extreme. I can't even floss my back teeth without vomiting or gargle. Eating triggers it half the time, and I've become significantly more motion sick.

Has anyone else gone through this? Any advice?

Do you often experience dramatic switch up in how people treat you based on how you look?

I've always been unattractive/ugly but I now look ugly. I messed up my eyes from surgeries - they are smaller and look uncanny and don't move normally. I have sleep issues and I look more androgynous/masculine for a woman. I have falio features but because of how my eyes are now this has caused significant disharmony.

Also with how thin my skin is it doesn't really hold my features and I sort of look like I have a facial deformity. I look quite strange and I understand why people react negatively to me.

Within the past few years I constantly get treated with hostility and disrespect. People are so unnecessarily aggressive towards me. I get called ugly regularly.

I cannot change society and how awful people are. I'm learning to develop thicker skin and accept that I have a facial deformity to cope with how I'm treated. Otherwise I can look into getting surgeries.

Courtney Stodden has publicly confronted Seinfeld actor Jason Alexander over a 2012 Funny or Die comedy sketch, questioning how adults allowed a scene where he rubbed a mobile phone across her breasts when she was just 17 years old.

My boyfriend and I are coming up on our one-year anniversary over Labor Day weekend, and we're struggling on how to celebrate. (Both are in our mid-40s, no kids, never married.)

We wanted to go to NYC but the hotels are too expensive that weekend. We're coming from DC - are there any places that may be romantic and affordable in the mid-Atlantic?

On a different weekend, we plan to revisit the places from our first few dates.

I thought about surprising him with a photo book, but he's sentimental and might want to create one together.

What did you do for your first anniversary that you're still glad you did? Or if you've been with your partner for years, what do you wish you'd done that first anniversary - weekend trips, traditions, meaningful activities, little surprises?

Thanks!