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Today, while my husband was at work, I packed everything I could and left. I told him over the phone that I was gone.

At first, he was furious. He called me every name imaginable, said he hated me, blamed me for ending our marriage, and said he'd just go find another woman.

Then everything changed.

He started begging me not to leave.

He said he doesn't want threesomes or happy massages anymore, that he doesn't need any of that, that he wants a fresh start, and that he's sorry for how he's treated me.

He admitted he should have protected me during a traumatic sexual situation that happened in our relationship.

He said he can't imagine life without me and that he has so much to apologize for.

But before those messages, I called him, and during the call he picked up his gun, repeatedly manipulated it, and calmly said it would be so easy to end things.

Earlier, he also told me he wanted to get "batshit drunk" and come to my family's house because he had enough rounds for all of them, including our son.

Now he's crying, apologizing, saying he loves me, and saying he doesn't think life is worth living without us.

I don't know what to believe anymore.

Part of me feels devastated for him. Another part of me is terrified because of what he said about the gun and my family.

Has anyone been through something like this? Is this a genuine turning point, or is it something that happens when someone realizes you're actually leaving?

I'm safe with a friend, and my son is with my family. I'm trying to think clearly, but I'm emotionally exhausted. Any advice would really help.

The whirlwind of everything he said is going around in my head. I feel so bad.

I left because I found out he had messaged another escort, and I had enough.

He also told me today he has no respect for me, I'm a slut, he said I'm weak and I'd never leave and he said if I really think he is a cheater he is gonna go all out and do it.

He also threw something from the fridge as hard as he could towards me while I was sitting on the couch, I dodged it. I was very calm the whole day trying to speak and reason to him, he also blamed me and said it's my fault he contacted the escort.

So I said "I won't be here for you to do it"

As soon as the front door clicked for him to leave for work, I became CRAZY with adrenaline and started packing everything, I called my family, they all came packed everything that belongs to me, I cleaned the entire place took pictures sent it to the landlord of how I left it, and left.

Am I making a mistake?

Without me (31f) and our son. I’m also 30 wks pregnant with our second son. I responded and said that’s hurtful especially since he was already away from us for 3 weeks in June. He responded and said “it’s just wishful thinking..I’m not actually going to do it” and I said how is that any better?? He then proceeded to say that I’m sensitive and I’m always bitching.

He also randomly said this to me. I was in the bedroom and he was downstairs in the basement and comes up and this is the first thing he says when he walked in. He also spends a lot of time alone.. every night he chills in the basement and I’m either in the living room or in the bedroom, so I really dont get it. I just want to pack up a bag and go to my parents house tbh.. Give him he wants bc wth.

So I have a pot roast recipe passed down from my best friend's Nana. It was the best pot roast I ever had and her grandmother loved me so much she'd call me her black grandchild (she was Scottish). So she gave me the recipe. I have cooked pot roast like that ever since. Problem is, my husband thinks it's the best pot roast ever too. There's never leftovers and he eats 80 percent of it. And somehow he's the skinny one to add insult to injury. This man. Smh.

I (33F) recently made a friend group of other moms with kids my sons age (just turned 3). We had been doing Tuesday night dinners at one of their houses every week and its been great. It gets me and my son out of the house, he gets to socialize with other kids his age.

Well the friend that had been hosting is going through some stuff and hasn't been able to host anymore. This ended up with me and one of the other moms really hitting it off and talking a ton. We later found out she adopted my cousins daughter also which is an insane story. Anyway so they have come over a day out of the week for the last few weeks kind of randomly. My husband (40) is super quiet and kind of to himself and he likes to game after work. I was going to have them come over today because its going to be raining the rest of the week and he got all annoyed about it because apparently one of her kids kept asking him a lot of questions and he didn't like it (like about whatever game he was playing).

Now husband has stormed outside to let the dogs out talking about how hes the bad guy now because yeah it kind of upset me how irritated he sounded when I asked him if it was OK they come over and the kids can play outside for a while. Ive now let my friend know today isn't a good day but it just doesnt feel good at all. I dont know what im looking for here, im just sad and frustrated that it feels like I cant comfortably have a friend over without it upsetting him. Sorry if this was a bit of a ramble and thanks for reading if you did 😅

Married five years, together fifteen, three kids, lots of other stuff. We have two cars and BOTH are having issues. We’re working together in a restaurant we bought a year and a half ago, he’s been alone in it most of the time until June when I left my job to help(and to go to grad school)… there’s been a series of other things that have been exceedingly difficult but we are working through stuff better than we ever have, I’ve wanted to make a post about it so many times because it’s been so amazing working with him. And I know it doesn’t work for everyone but it’s amazing for us. And then tonight on my way home, our car started overheating on the side of the highway. He came and rescued me with coolant on his motorcycle. He was incredible chill and loving even through all of it, even though it really sucked. I am just very grateful for him and he might be tired of hearing about it. Don’t fret, I do find other ways to express my gratitude and reciprocate

With marriage comes a lot of responsibilities and usually a good amount of drama. Often people think they were much happier and life was simpler before they got married. I’m curious as to what the everyone’s take is.

Please do not judge on this thread. I can't take it right now.

My husband and I sleep in separate bedrooms for many very valid reasons - sleep preferences, I have extreme difficulty with sleep in general, he goes to work hours before me, I come home from work hours after he is sleeping, the bed is awful for my back and I have many health issues. Hubby even lovingly purchased an adjustable bedframe for me. We will have sleepovers, and we do sleep in the same bed when we are on holiday. I usually end up stiff and hardly able to move halfway through our holiday and weeks after, but that's how my life is.

We had this arrangement since before he proposed. We have been together 10 years, married less than 2. Since we got married i feel constantly judged by my MIL. She was APPALLED that I don't do all of our laundry (we share the task) and that I don't have dinner ready for him everyday...(he loves to cook, and dinner is at work....together). We both work the same job and same amount of hours. 10 to 12 hour days....

Recently we ended up being on similar schedules (still hours apart though), and I guess my MIL figured we must be sleeping in the same bed. My husband was telling a story and said the dreaded "her" bed. Immediately, my MIL LOUDLY and in a very judgy tone said "HERRRR BED?!" - in front of others....

Anyway...what can I say the next time she asks why we are in separate beds? She will 100% bring it up. We don't really like to tell people because...it's not anyone's business. We're going on "Family Vacay" VERY soon. Can someone help with a response? Maybe even a response that questions why she feels like it's her business? If you all couldn't tell, I am not great with my wording. I am so very tired of explaining it when it accidentally gets brought up....

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​I’m sitting in the chair where I rocked both of my babies, typing this out because I don't know what else to do, and I just need a hopeful word or advice from people who get it.

​My husband and I met when I was 41. We were both told by doctors that we’d never have children, but here we are with two incredible miracle kids (3 and 1). I love them with everything I have, but if they weren't here, I’m 100% sure we’d be divorced.

​I’m a stay-at-home mom now, and I’m completely burnt out. My daily life is a loop of nap schedules, feeding schedules, and household duties. My only free time is spent cleaning or showering. By the time my husband gets home from his physically demanding job, I am completely spent.

​I appreciate that he works hard, but he doesn't value what I do. "Thank you" feels like empty words. He doesn't treat me like his wife or a priority—he treats me like a burden. We have sex maybe six times a year, and when he’s home, he’d rather stare at his phone than engage with me. I don't want his help around the house at this point—I want to be valued, seen, and treated like a treasure. I gave up my career, my independence, and my body for this family, and I feel completely invisible.

​To make matters worse, there is serious history here:

​Volatile behavior: Early on, he threatened to hit me, put a hole in the door, and yelled in my face to intimidate me. While he hasn't done that recently and is a good dad to our kids while they're small, I am terrified of how he will act when they get older and start pushing boundaries.

​Infidelity: He had a 3-year emotional affair with a woman. He even brought this "friend" into the birthing suite after our second baby was born. She only realized he was married when she ran a report at the hospital as a tech and saw my name and my baby’s name. The appropriateness only stopped once I personally found out and stepped in.

​We are both Christian. I have prayed, studied, sought advice, and even kicked him out at one point, but nothing leads to lasting change. He doesn't seem to want me or love me, and the thought of laying next to him in bed right now literally makes me sick.

​I feel completely stuck. I love my kids, but I don't know how to navigate this isolation or how to find a path forward to actually being happy. Has anyone been in a similar spot and found a way through?

My wife and I have been married for 22 years, and have known each other since the start of high school. We had a pretty active and normal sex life- few times a week, foreplay/different positions/different locations, etc…. As of the last four years, we are lucky to go at it once a week, sometimes every other week. Lately, I have noticed that we have sex the night before, she is masterbating the following morning when I head off to work.

I can’t tell if my ego is getting the worst of me, or she doesn’t want to admit she isn’t enjoying sex, or at least fully satisfied. I remember her really criticizing a friends relationship when she found out the friends boyfriend would go rub one out after their sexy time, and my wife thought it was completely disgusting and disrespectful. However, I kind of feel this is a similar scenario.

I have asked her point blank recently if she is satisfied sexually with our relationship and she is for the most part but has mentioned that she wants me to take control more. We recently had a night that was some of the best sex we ( at least I thought we) had in a while. I was telling her what to do, and it all seemed like she was into it. However the next morning, she seemed to get her self off on her own after I headed out the door.

Am I tripping over nothing, or is there something I should be concerned with and/or do to address this. All this time it feels like she is just going thru the motions, which makes me uninterested in initiating and I seemingly can’t enjoy sex like I use to.

Thoughts?

We’ve been together since 2017. Married in 2020. Last year after playing tennis one night, I was taunting him about all of the games I beat him in. As I was taunting him, he starting sounding out the word “Nnnnnnnnn….” and before I finished my sentence he said it. “N***ER”. He called me the n word with a hard r. I’m Afro Latina (Zoe Saldana-ish) and he is Asian.

He’s never been racist. In fact, it wasn’t until last year that I noticed he started showing signs of racism. I don’t know why I’m having a delayed response to this… maybe it’s because I’ve been putting patterns together.

In a group chat, some of our friends shared pictures of a neighborhood with Halloween decor and they said it was a beautiful and safe neighborhood. He replied “that’s because there are no (ninja emoji)”. Nobody responded to that and I had a stern talk with him about it.

Years ago (while married) when i talked about what are future kids might look like, I said what If they are pale like you and he said “let’s hope”.

These are things you just don’t forget.

2 weeks ago while watching FIFA I said “wow France definitely looks like France”. And he said “what do you mean babe there’s a black guy in the other team too haha”. And I told him “not everything is about race, I was talking about the uniforms”.

He noticed I was very bothered by that and kind of put his shoulders down in shame once the game was over 2 hours later.

I just have a major ick. I feel like he is regressing. He has exhibited other red flags such as major corn addiction. And hint hint. Everyone is Asian or blonde.

First, thank you to everyone who commented on my original post. I read far more responses than I could reply to, and while some were hard to read, I appreciate everyone who took the time to share their thoughts.

My husband came home so we could finally sit down and talk face to face. He was extremely apologetic from the moment we started talking. He kept saying how sorry he was and that he doesn't want to lose me.

His explanation hasn't really changed. He said he was far too drunk and genuinely believed he was dancing with me. He admitted he rarely drinks hard liquor, said he overdid it that night, and kept repeating that I know him and that this isn't who he is. I told him that was hard for me to believe considering he kissed my cousin and touched her on the dance floor in front of everyone.

He answered every question I asked. He handed me his phone without hesitation and let me look through everything. I didn't find any messages between him and my cousin or anything that suggested there had been an ongoing affair. Since leaving after everything happened, he has also been sharing his location with me, and as far as I can tell he's only been at work or at his parents' house. As far as I know, he has never communicated with my cousin outside of the times we've all been together as a family.

We talked for about an hour. He accepted responsibility, apologized over and over, and said he knows he broke my trust. He said he'll do whatever it takes to rebuild it if I give him the chance.

The problem is that I'm still torn.

Part of me wants to believe him. Part of me wants to believe this was a horrible drunken mistake, forgive him, and try to move forward with our marriage.

The other part of me keeps replaying what I saw at the wedding. I can't get the image out of my head. I worry that if I forgive him too easily, I'll end up looking like a fool if there was more to it than he's admitting.

I still feel incredibly lost. I love my husband, but my trust has been shaken in a way I never imagined. I don't know if I'm being too hopeful or too skeptical.

For those of you who have been through something similar, how did you decide whether it was a one-time mistake that could be worked through, or a sign that the relationship couldn't recover?

I’m a 51F, he’s a 61M. We’ve been married for 13 years, no kids. I’ve been supporting him for half of our marriage, ever since he quit his job to start a business that he didn’t know how to run, and it failed. He put all of his retirement savings into it, too. A couple of years ago, he finally finished his bachelor’s degree (in Communications) after a 40-year hiatus but can’t seem to put it to use. He puts out resumes every so often but it’s hard to start a new career at his age and he’s not willing to take on something menial as long as I can support him. And I make a pretty good salary, but not enough to replace and build the retirement savings that we really should have at our age.

He spends a lot of money, too, and has a moderate drinking problem. Did I mention he has a boat? In case you don’t know, those things are floating money pits. And he told me the other day that he bought a new monitor because the one he had just bought wasn’t working—turned out he didn’t know where the power button was. I suggested he return the new new one and he said he wanted to keep it because the speakers were better.

The monitor itself isn’t a big deal, it’s just one example of the way he spends the money that he doesn’t make. I’m paying his student loans and boat repairs on top of regular living expenses and shopping sprees.

At the same time we’ve reached a sexless stage of our marriage where it feels like we’re roommates, as so many others here have experienced. And part of that’s normal as you get older, but a large part is probably because I see him as less of a partner than a dependent. And I feel guilty about that, like if you love someone, money shouldn’t matter. But I don’t know if I do love him, really. Our personalities and senses of humor are compatible, but like I said, there’s no passion.

More to the point, if I left him I would have to pay alimony, and then I’d be so broke I’d have to live with a roommate anyway, so I might as well stay in my own house. I’m just tired of feeling trapped and resentful. I keep remembering that old line, “a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle” and fantasizing about an alternate life as a spinster.

I do childcare drop off 3 days a week, my wife does once and my mother-in-law comes to our house once a week to watch the baby so no drop off required.

Thursday is the day my wife does drop off and coincidentally she wakes up feeling terrible about once a month on a given Thursday and I need to do the drop off. Never so sick that she can’t go into work but sick enough that she can’t do drop off. She’s never too sick for work, she won’t miss work for anything but drop off is like her Kryptonite.

Two weeks ago she said her throat hurt last Thursday morning and I finally had enough. I said if you’re not so sick that you’re not going to go to work then I’m not doing drop off. I do it every other day and it fucks up my schedule on one of the two days I go into the office (long commute). She got really mad but we got over it.

Now her throat has been hurting her for two weeks straights, genuinely hurting her and I’ve been telling her to go to the doctor for two weeks straight. Now two weeks later it’s Wednesday night at 8PM and she asks me to go in late so that she can run to the doctors office early before work. I know she’s sick but this pattern is so frustrating so I called her on it and said we didn’t need to see her friends Saturday, she could have gone Sunday, she could have gone Monday when I did drop off, she could have gone Tuesday when her Mom was here, she could have gone today when I did drop off. She thinks I’m being an asshole because she’s sick and I’m unsupportive but I’ve been telling her to get checked out for two weeks.

It’s like the most ridiculous thing to be gaslit about but it’s also such a clear pattern of her trying to inconvenience me.

Hi guys. I need some advice. My husband just started a new job. He met a fellow teacher who is 21 years old. She’s married. Inexperienced in the teaching field. My husband has been in education for years. They are on the fourth day of training for all the educators at the school. Today, my husband drove with her in his car to the training location that they had to visit at the other school branch location. They then rode together to the coworker lunch. He asked her if her husband was bothered by him. She said no, she thinks because he’s much older that he doesn’t see him as a threat or an issue.

I feel like this is an inappropriate relationship forming. What would you think, if you were his wife? I’m trying to handle this as best I can.

I have been asking him to help more with yard work. I mentioned to him around 12 that the yard needed done. So he got up and went out to do it shirtless. No sunscreen or anything. He comes back in an hour later pissed off and burnt really bad. I tried to hand him a water and he didn’t want it. I tried to over him a cold shower uninterrupted and he said no. I said why didn’t you wear a shirt? The sun is blistering out there. I also said hey I think we have sunscreen Why didn’t you get some? And he blamed it on me said he didn’t know we had it. I said just ask. He started blaming me and saying it’s my fault for telling him to do it at the hottest part of the day. I explained that I said it needed done I didn’t necessarily mean it had to be in the middle of noon at the hottest point of the day and I sure as hell didn’t mean he had to do it shirtless and without sunscreen. So then I got mad that he blamed me. And then he goes well I’m sure you enjoy your nice air conditioned job I’m sure it’s really hard but I work all night in a hot factory .. him insulting my work and making it seem like it’s not as hard as his really upsets me because he’s never been that kind of guy to compare. he does this a lot when I set boundaries and ask him to pull his weight

TLDR: Husband says my political beliefs reflect poor morals. I feel trapped and don’t know if I’m wrong or being forced to conform.

Summarised narration:
My husband asked me to move out and stay away from him after we had a heated argument about the student protests currently taking place in India. For a long time, I have felt that he has labelled me as someone who does not “empathise” with what he considers the right political cause.

What has always baffled me is the moral certainty with which he approaches political issues. I, on the other hand, tend to reserve judgment initially and prefer to understand both sides before forming an opinion. My belief has always been that during periods of political unrest, very rarely is one side entirely right and the other entirely wrong.

A few days ago, I made a social media post. My husband and my sister-in-law discussed it between themselves and concluded that I was “blind” and incapable of empathising with the issue. Ironically, I was actually supportive of the protest itself. The only aspect I criticised was the violence that some protesters had engaged in.

When my husband came home from work, he sat me down for what felt like an intervention. He told me, “I am worried about your moral integrity.” I was stunned. I may not be a perfect person, but I genuinely make an effort to stay informed by reading news from across the political spectrum before forming my own opinions.

Throughout my life, I have volunteered for animal welfare, worked with children, and supported underprivileged communities. I am also a proud feminist. I have a stable career and contribute equally to our household. I sincerely try to become a better person every day. That is why hearing my own husband question my moral character hurt me so deeply.

The discussion eventually became heated, and I lost my temper as well. At one point, I told him that I did not have to conform to his political beliefs and that, since he had already decided what kind of person I was, I might as well continue voting for the political party he despises.

At that point, he started packing his belongings and said he wanted a divorce.

We dated for a year before getting married, and we got married only last month. Hearing that completely shattered me. I ended up apologising and eventually even agreed with his interpretation of the events unfolding in the country, despite still being uncertain about what I truly believe.

A few days later, I asked him what mattered more to him- our relationship or politics. He replied, “Both.” When I asked him to choose, he said he wanted a partner who empathised with a particular political narrative.

For me, the relationship matters more than politics. I am willing to suppress my own views if it means preserving our marriage. But doing so feels deeply suffocating.

To make matters worse, I also argued with my sister-in-law because I have long felt that both she and my husband speak to me condescendingly and see me as intellectually inferior whenever I disagree with their political opinions.

I genuinely do not know whether I am in the wrong or whether I am simply being judged for not adopting a more uncompromising political stance.

For context, I am from India, where student protests are currently taking place across the country. I was supposed to join one of the protests today because I support the broader movement. However, after everything that has happened, I feel as though I have already been branded a bad person, and part of me wonders whether I should simply stop trying to prove otherwise.

To clarify my own position, I have consistently supported the protests. The only thing I said was that I appreciated the government for making arrests and taking some degree of accountability. I also agree that the Education Minister should resign, although I am not convinced that doing so alone would meaningfully resolve the underlying issues.

More generally, I have no problem acknowledging policies or infrastructure projects that I believe the government has handled well. My husband, however, strongly dislikes any praise of the current government, and this difference in approach has become a recurring source of conflict between us.

In two weeks we are having our third baby since 2023. Three pregnancies and all the weight gain and loss and lifestyle changes plus the financially stress of having one income and the mental stress of being a stay at home mom has all sort of depriorirized our marriage. I had ppd with our second baby and am currently in therapy for that. Anyway, my husband And I have been together for 18 years (12 married) and I'm wondering if we will ever feel like best friends again. We still have great sex but it's brief (30 mins to an hour) then we sleep in our separate rooms. I have had at least one kid in the room with me at night for 3.5 years and he sleeps upstairs in the spare bedroom so that he has full energy for work since he's the sole income. I just miss him. He feels like a stranger or roommate. We were pretty awful to each other during my ppd for about a year and a half. I basically resented him because he wouldn't really apologize or validate my feelings and he grew emotionally distant over time. I just want to feel emotionally connected again and like we are teammates spiritually not just functionally.

I (33F) feel so lonely in my marriage and lately I keep wondering if this is actually how marriage is supposed to feel.
My (32M) husband and I have been together for a long time and we have two kids. I love him and I think that is part of what makes this so hard. If I completely hated him or felt nothing for him I think the answer would be easier. But I still care about him and I still want his attention and I still want affection from him and I still find myself hoping things will get better.
The problem is that most of the time I feel completely alone.
He works a lot and when he gets home he usually wants to drink or play video games or watch something or be left alone. I understand needing time to decompress but it feels like there is never really a point where he actually wants to spend time with me. Sometimes I genuinely feel like if I walk into the room he is in he eventually finds a reason to go to another room. I spend all day taking care of our kids and our house and by the time he comes home I am craving adult conversation and connection but it feels like I am bothering him just by wanting him.
When I try to talk about our marriage or his job or finances or his family or anything that feels important to me it often turns into me being told that I am causing problems or that I have trust issues or that I always want to fight or that I am too emotional. Sometimes I feel like I cannot bring up anything difficult without the entire conversation somehow becoming about what is wrong with me.
I know I am not perfect. I can be anxious. I overthink things. I have definitely been insecure in our relationship and I know there are probably times when I have pushed conversations when he did not want to have them. I am not trying to make myself out to be completely innocent.
But I also feel like I have spent so much time asking myself what I need to change that I barely stop to ask whether the way I am being treated is actually okay.
There has also been drinking and his personality can become much meaner when he drinks. There have been nights where the atmosphere in our house feels tense enough that even our kids notice it. My children have made comments about him being mean to me. One of them has literally told him to stop being mean to Mommy. That is probably one of the things that has affected me the most because I keep thinking about what kind of relationship I am modeling for them.
There has also been physical aggression during an argument. He shoved me into a wall once while he had been drinking hard enough that a picture frame fell. I hate even typing that because I know how it sounds. I also know that if another woman told me her husband did that I would probably immediately tell her that it was serious.
But somehow when it is your own life you find yourself minimizing everything.
I keep thinking about the good things. The times he helps me with something around the house. The moments where we laugh. The history we have. Our kids. The life we built. I remember who we used to be and I keep wondering if that version of us is still in here somewhere. :(
At the same time I am becoming sadder and more resentful. I feel like I am constantly trying to earn love from someone I am already married to. I think about what I can do to make him want me more or appreciate me more or compliment me more or spend time with me or cuddle me or just seem happy to be around me.
And lately I have started wondering whether the real question is not how do I make my husband love me better but why am I working this hard to convince my husband to want a relationship with me.
The thought of leaving terrifies me. We have children and finances are complicated and I still love him. I also worry about regretting it. I worry that I will destroy my family because I was unhappy during a rough period that could have eventually gotten better.
But then I think about staying like this for another five years or ten years and that scares me too.
I do not even know exactly what I am asking. Maybe I just need outside perspectives from people who are not emotionally involved.
Have any of you ever reached a point where you realized you were lonelier in your marriage than you would be being alone?
How did you know whether your marriage was going through a terrible season versus whether the relationship itself had become unhealthy?
I feel completely stuck between loving someone and realizing that loving them might not be enough.
I’m so sad. And I have so much to be grateful for. I’m so stuck and I feel isolated. He told me that he doesn’t want my little sister coming over the HIS house anymore because he found out that I told her he shoved me. And now I feel even more isolated.

I’m super picky about cleanliness, especially when it comes to my feet. I absolutely hate the feeling of dirt or crumbs on them…it’s one of those things that instantly makes me uncomfortable and dirty.
Yesterday I mentioned my feet felt dirty after being out in sandals. I didn’t hint or ask (never have, never will). I just said it in passing. Before I could even move, my husband got up, grabbed a washcloth, and wiped the bottom of my feet.
It was an incredibly intimate moment for me. It’s the quiet, instinctive moments where someone shows you they know you, they accept you, and they want to make your world a little better.

I cried after lol. I have never had a man who is so willing to take care of me in the way he does. I feel so loved. obviously there’s so much more than what happened yesterday. I can write about him for hours. He is an incredible man and husband.

During my 16 year marriage to my husband, he has always been reluctant to check in with me during his business trips. I used to call him and he’d be furious with me. I just assumed when you love someone and miss them that you check in occasionally. Well, according to him that is not the case.

Fast forward to 2022 and I find out about infidelity unrelated to his work travel. He commits to fixing things and works really hard- reading books, therapists, etc. He says he’ll check in during trips and he committed to that for a time.

He’s the type when he’s at home to be in bed before midnight even if I beg him to stay up with me to hang out. But on his business trips he stays out at all hours, drinking a lot which is not how he is at home. He might drink 1 beer every 6 months.

Welp. It’s 2 am where he’s at and he hasn’t contacted me in 5 hours and is out with who knows, doing who knows what. Is this normal? How does this work in your own marriage? I know that if I were on a business trip, I’d miss my family and want to check in.

Let’s say he’s been flirting with a coworker and eventually admits to that coworker that he fell for her. But, he’s not actually looking for an affair or anything. Would you want to know?