Throw away account for obv reasons.

First paragraph is a short version, later ones contain additional info.

I'm (24M) in therapy and medically treated since I was 14, then I was diagnosed with depression and alexythymia and got lamotriginium and some other meds for sleeping (no anidepressants which I didn't know). Doctor after the first visit told me he suspects BPD. My delusions about people secretly hating me and plotting against me behind my back partly dissapeared, same with agression (throwing chairs, phones, fighting with my sibling, etc), still had some self harm tendencies.
When I was 18 I got personality tests (the clinical ones done by psyhologists) and here it was written about me having potencial to develop BPD. After going from straight A in school to failing University I knew something was wrong with me. I felt free after moving to a different city, started improvising and scheming going around the system, thanks to that I menaged to stay in Uni. My depression got better but my relations with people got worse, typical alexythimia style. Was 19 when diagnosed with ADHD and took meds, I realised that I had one of the heaviest cases there could be, didn't know I had memory loss, tics, forgetting people exist, etc. Got into student organisations and I was alvays around some drama, I would talk about secrets cause I didn't realise they were secrets. People didn't want to tell me stuff and it fueled my delusions about people secretly hating me and scheming against me.
One time I didn't have meds for around two weeks and oh boy. I realised that without meds I was controlled by something different. I knew that delusional thoughs in my head weren't mine, it was something else's. I think of it as my brain, it's something different and could control my body when I didn't yet have meds. Ironically, that temporal lack of meds was a blessing, I finally knew that something was controlling me and since that I could control it instead. I also know that if I ever couldn't take meds I would just off myself, that is a fact, I don't want to be alive only as a spectator in a body that I can't control. After telling my psychologist she said those were BPD behaviours (tho could be caused by sudden lack of meds, brain chemistry goes brrr).
Few months ago new pshychiatrist (after three sesions) gave me more lamoriginium and my life changed yoooo. No more spirals thinking that people try to harm me and publicly humiliate, no more desperate need for closure, even my friend told me that my behaviour improved (he didn't know about more meds).
The thing is dear reader, I AM STILL NOT DIAGNOSED WITH BPD or any illness that would require lamotriginium. It's exhausting to constantly be told that I'm not ill when I get more and more meds. Now I take 275 mg lamotriginium, 50 mg metylophenidad, 150 m preabalinium and 50 mg trazodoni hydrochloridium. Feel bad for me, that's why I wrote this.

Additional info:

I didn't cry when I was an infant, not even durin birth and as a todler, didn't speak so long that my parents considered to take me to see a doctor but one day I just randomly started speaking with full sentences. My sibling was terrified of me since I was a severe sleepwalker, going into closets and whatnot, now I only sit on bed and talk. I was the smart one, acting very mature but severly bullied in school, I told my mum that I will off myself if she didn't transfer me to a different class when I was 8. As I wrote in the first paragraph I was delusional and starved for atention and help, wanted someone to rescue me from being abused both in school and in home (I was being beaten by my drunkard waste of oxygen "father"). I often had stomachaches that landed me in a hospital with a suspection of a busted appendix, couldn't move from pain and was deemed a faker, later (as in I worked it out in highschool) it turned out that I was clenching my muscles from stress.

I finally could make friends in high school but noticed that in the best school in my area I was getting behind with my studies. When I got accepted into a University my real problems started, from the smart one I became a failing one but it turned out I was pretty good at getting around the system. I still had severe problems with abadonment, couldn't let go, had to be right. I felt like people have been isolating themselfs from me, so I tried to insert myself into their lives which would alvays end as a disaster. Got dianosed with severe ADHD and meds kinda help but I still had delusional spirals that could last weeks. Finally, after geting another incerase of meds I now can mostly control myself, as if I can differenciate my desires and thoughs from my brain's. There are people who rightfully dislike me but I'm happy since that does not bother me anymore. The best for me and them is me finally behaving like a normal person and leaving them tf alone. My brain finally is silent but when it gets out I shove that sucker right back into my mind's corner.

i was 12 he was 13. he was my first kiss, first “i love you”, first all and my first heartbreak. when we broke up i felt so so bad i could feel my heart physically hurt. since then i even date other peoples but sometimes i just miss him SO MUCH, i have dreams where we just hug for a long time and i feel completely full. now i’m 17 and he’s almost 18 and idk if i will ever forget this.

Let’s talk about two people: a husband and a wife. (although reverse is just as true)

The husband loves receiving oral sex, and the wife loves performing oral sex on him. I would categorize it as a connecting and mutually fulfilling experience for both of them. If they both find joy and connection through this act, and both enthusiastically consent to it, I don’t see any issue. To me, it exists as an isolated event where both people experience joy.

Between the same two partners however, the husband does not find it appealing to perform oral sex on his wife. In his experience, that particular sexual act feels deeply unpleasant, and because of that he cannot genuinely consent to it. Even if he goes through with it, he is experiencing unwanted sex. Even if his wife delights in the act in the moment, it is still a disconnecting experience for both of them because the husband is engaging in unwanted sexual activity, while the wife is having sex with a partner who is repulsed by the act. I believe every bare minimum decent person wants their partner to also consent to and genuinely delight in any sexual activity they share together.

Outside of these two things, the husband and wife have plenty of sexual activities that are pleasurable, connecting, and fulfilling for both of them.

However, since the husband does not consent to performing oral sex on his wife, is the wife justified in characterizing him as “lazy” or “selfish” in bed? I don’t think so - not for a single moment.

I’ve seen this attitude a lot. Many people describe their spouse as “selfish in bed,” when a more charitable explanation could simply be that they simply lack genuine curiosity about how their spouse experiences certain sex acts. That lack of understanding can make the other person feel as though their spouse is being lazy, when in reality they may simply not know which activities are capable of being mutually pleasurable together.

Back to the case I proposed. Let’s say the wife feels resentful that her husband cannot consent to performing oral sex on her and is therefore unwilling to do it. Because she experiences the situation as fundamentally “unbalanced,” she takes blowjobs off the table.

I would recognize that she shouldn’t judge herself for feeling resentful. At the same time, those feelings do not make it her husband’s responsibility to solve or prevent by having oral sex he does not want.

However, I would urge her to consider something else. By taking blowjobs off the table, isn’t she also losing an activity that brings connection to both of them? This assumes, of course, that she is fully consenting to and genuinely enjoys giving oral sex.

I would also tell her that it is coercive to call her spouse lazy or selfish in bed when they already share plenty of sexual activities that are mutually pleasurable for both of them. If she labels him as lazy or selfish simply because he said no to one act, she creates conditions where he is more likely to feel guilty for maintaining his boundary. That guilt makes it more likely that, eventually, he will say yes against his own body’s message.

In the short term, that guilt may allow someone to extract sex from an unwilling spouse. In the long term it will create a stubborn sexual aversion and do significant damage to the relationship because it destroys the sense of safety surrounding consent.

She is absolutely allowed to take giving oral sex off the table if she can no longer genuinely consent to it/is a bad experience for her and brings up negative physical/emotional experiences. Full stop.

However, if giving a blowjob is something that is intrinsically rewarding for her, then giving it up purely out of unregulated resentment means she also loses something meaningful, not just her husband.. For someone like her, once she’s able to process those resentful feelings in a healthier way, she could very much arrive at a different conclusion and choose love and connection over anger/frustration that her spouse does not deserve. Whether this means solely focusing on other acts they both enjoy together or bringing back blowjobs because despite the mismatch, it still brings HER joy to perform and is something she’s able to consent to.

In that sense, it is irrelevant that her husband experiences pleasure from receiving oral sex, so long as she is pursuing the act for her own enjoyment.

I met this girl like a month ago, we hit it off instantly had a lot of fun connected emotionally, felt like i could maybe escape the rat race once and for all if everything went well. A week passes she starts getting colder towards me, another week passes, she starts just barely texting me, another week passes, shes decided to ghost me.

No clue what i did wrong, but im incredibly sad about the whole ordeal, it really felt good to feel a little bit of love but i kinda wish i didnt feel it at all.

Every time its like this, i dont even know what i do wrong, maybe im just the only human being in the universe who is by divine decree undeserving of love at all. I've lived a loveless life for 24 consecutive years, not even my own mother likes me, but whatever, i guess this was the last sign i needed from the universe to just confirm that my deathbed will be as empty as it gets.

I’m a 22f and my boyfriend is 26m, we’ve been dating 4 months. Before we dated there was a guy who would send me money (100-200) a week if I sexted him and occasionally sent suggestive or half nude photos.

Well after I got into a relationship I stopped texting him and he kept sending me money without me sending any pics and kept texting me. To keep it going I said “hey” to him back sometimes and when he said “you up?” I said “I’m up” with a winky face just to get him to send something. I’ve done it a total of 3 or 4 times over the past 3 months. I never said anything past just hey or I’m up

I didn’t think that was considered cheating at the time until I posted about it and everyone said it was cheating. Now I feel like shit about myself and I don’t even know what to do. I can’t even eat I feel like I’m gonna throw up. I can’t even get out of bed now and I don’t want to.

I don’t know how to tell him because hes so sweet and I don’t know what to do. I think I will just tell him and then break up because I don’t even see how we’d even be together after this. Like I couldn’t live with myself knowing I did this and he’s still with me I can’t. I don’t even know what to do. Like how can I even forgive myself after doing this

Hey, idk what to say or where to start.

I was super duper depressed in November of 2025. That was my first ever real attempt or almost attempt to end it all. I tried to stabilize two weeks after that. I then started a new job as an HR person in December. From December to almost April I was struggling a lot, with the work load, thinking I won't fit in, feeling like dog shit, feeling extremely bloated and I was fat. Gaining lots of weight, having a major emotional connection to food.

Then mid April came, I traveled for the first time by myself to London (I live in germany). Met a girl I have known online for quite some while and well she was nt the person I thought she was the past 3 years. Seems like she was tying to destiny swap with me. Everything I had told this girl in the past was being said to my face as her own story. Creepy shit. That was also the month where I had started horseback riding. Then I injured my wrist. I ignored the injury and kept doing what I had been doing.

May came and I started wearing a bandage, still unaware on why I had to do that. I don't really remember much of may but it wasn't too pleasing either. I was just focused on losing weight and doing whatever. I lost about 17 kilograms I believe, from walking and doing everything in my power to keep going. June came. I turned 20. Thats when I traveled by myself to another country again, did some shopping and I remember coming back home, doing nothing but sleep for a week straight. I went to my mom crying, telling her that I dont want to live like this and she said that it might have been just travel exhausting. I called it a day and the week after I was in another city for the weekend, then I stayed home, in my home town for a week and left to travel to another country again.

While I was on said vacation my parents told me that I will get engaged, arranged marriage situation. I thought it was a joke and called it a day. I also got a rejection from final round for a job that I wanted since march because I was really looking forward to doing something that wasn't HR or anyhow related to it. HR has been my personal nightmare so far. Flew back home, news were true, I was going to get married to a fat loser. I wasn't allowed to leave town for the weekend to kiss my short term boyfriend goodbye. He left the country, I was at home...cussing and yelling, screaming and sleeping all day long because I didn't want to face reality or my parents. Met said guy and I was having major mental breakdowns almost every single day. My blood would boil when he texted me.

He waned me to cook and clean for him, get rid of my job dress however he wants me to, said he was jealous and had aggression problems, said he doesn't want his wife aka me to smoke and travel alone, etc. It was the worst 3 weeks of my life. He was 28 years old. He called it off because I wasn't obeying him.

Today is the first week where my life is supposed to be back to normal but it doesn't feel that way. my life is a mess. I feel like dog shit and honestly like a total mess. I dont know what to do with myself or how to communicate it with anyone because I will sound like a dramatic person. No one listened to me when I mentioned my concerns about my fiancé and how I think that he is extremely toxic.

I'm 20 years old, and I feel like I've hit rock bottom. Growing up, I was a top student in primary and middle school, and my parents had high expectations for me. But when I reached high school, I started feeling burned out and depressed. My grades dropped, I failed my high school exam twice, and after the second time I completely lost confidence in myself.

My parents encouraged me to enroll in vocational IT training. I actually enjoy IT, and I'm currently doing an apprenticeship at a company. Unfortunately, it's been one of the most toxic environments I've ever experienced, and instead of working in the information systems department, I was placed in the property department. It has left me feeling hopeless and made me decide that life isn't an option anymore, like if nothing I do is good enough than lets not exist to do anything at all.

I've pulled away from my friends and even my family because maybe if they get used to not sering me around they would not miss me.

I would like you to think of this post as a polite way to say goodbye, no i'm not seeking attention, thank you for reading my story.

so frustrating i swear i just want everyone to fuck tf off

I teach art at an afterschool program. It’s a job I got after the pandemic and it wasn’t exactly something I wanted to do I just needed money at the time. I went to a very prestigious art school and I always expected my career to be that of a serious artist, showing in galleries, doing illustration jobs, working on big projects, etc. But as expected it’s been a struggle to get off the ground despite any success or momentum I had. A lot of that is kind of do to my own self sabotage, not understanding how bad my adhd was, and just poor mental health, but I’ve worked on that a lot in the past few years. Teaching in this program I always viewed it as temporary, even now, but after 3 or 4 years there.. I actually have grown to enjoy it a lot. I’ve taught some of the same students for a few years and I’ve seen them grow so much as people and artists and it truly makes me proud. I’m so happy for them and I want to keep encouraging them to become better and never stop making art. I’m sure many of them will become better artists than me and that makes me really happy. My goal has always been to give my students confidence in themselves because that’s something that always held me back a lot. I’ve seen how much they’ve matured over time into better artists and it’s just so cool and amazing to witness

I used to be ashamed to be teaching art to young kids, mainly because I felt like I could be doing so much more with my life, but I’ve really seen how rewarding it can be and that has truly made it a worthwhile endeavor. Though I really don’t want this to be where my career ends I’m just happy to have been positive in these kids lives

It’s really becoming a problem, even when i was in a relationship i only dreamed of fucking with some 40y dude but i’m too scared to do anything. I can’t tell this to my friends bc as a 19y girl they would all just judge ( i told one and got mocked for 30 minutes)

Today was a very bad day for me, even though I'm on vacation.

First, today was the day I learned that I was rejected by the university I wanted to go to. The whole vacation, I was waiting for an answer. First they hit me up with "you are on the waiting list" then they straight up say that they don't have any available place for a class. I was preparing to get into this university for 3 years now.

I was kind of down this whole day, and my family took notice. They constantly asked if I wanted to do something. In the evening, I told them it would be fun to play some board games. Little thing I forgot was that my dad becomes an ass when he's drunk, and my sister is spoiled. He was doing his thing again, being an ass to everyone around him. My dad, me, my sister. And to that my sister took that very personally, and left to our room whining. I begged her to come back to no avail. Now I feel like this was on me to play some games in the first place.

And now I have to share a room with them. Not only that, because this is the last day od the vacation, I have to go on a 6 hour car ride with them first thing tomorrow morning. Bruh.

I guess after writing out everything, I just feel dissapointed.

I'm disappointed that I still lack the ability to get into a mid tier university even after 3 years of training. (Obviously I'm not just disappointed about this, I'm crying to myself in the toilet lol)

I'm disappointed that I thought my sister might have changed.

I'm disappointed that I thought my dad would finally behave himself.

I don't know if I'm overreacting, I don't know if these are just problems that I shouldn't even worry about, but everything that happened today, just made me feel like such a failure to myself. To my family.

Sorry for the bad english, hope you all had a nice day today.

Yesterday I got back home late from a flight that was delayed due to the tornado watch in Newark and went to the bodega on my street for a snack. A kid of around 11-12 who normally works there with his dad took my order at approximately 12 a.m. The issue of child labor at New York immigrant businesses periodically comes up on Reddit about NYC but the fact that it was a school day and so late felt particularly wrong. I can’t stop thinking about it.

Yesterday I almost got rear ended by my own fault not seeing my blind spot, the guy got out the car yelling at me and trying to make me exit my car so he could confront me. no one got hit. He sped up to catch me and stopped in front of me in an attempt to get me to rear end him. He then said he had my license plate and would find me, this is a small city. lve been shook all day and can’t get rid of paranoia anytime I see a black honda civic coupe. To add on that, I can’t get off my mind this girl who’s back in my life who I can’t stop thinking of and her not being much of a texter freaks me out. Even tho in person she has so much emotion and passion for me , I’m scared of her I guess. I don’t really trust her, anytime i’ve given up my heart to her she’s never chosen me, now she has. But it’s because she just got out of an abusive relationship not more than a month ago. I’m just a safe choice? A rebound? I’m overwhelmed. I’m tired mentally, I reverted back to smoking cigarettes.

I have been with my wife for 10 years and married for a couple of those years, our relationship has been rocky from the very beginning. I treated her with respect and kindness from the very beginning, her on the other hand has treated me like shit and has put her hands on me (punches and scratches)

We have kids together and maybe that’s why I haven’t left her, or maybe because I’m comfortable as I grew up seeing my parents fight all the time until they had my younger siblings.

We both have cheated, I cheated emotionally by adding girls and liking their pictures and I’ve gotten nudes from other females. She has cheated emotionally and physically, she’s been talking to guys and sending nudes up until recently. She cheated physically a couple days before our oldest turned 1, for about 6 months. I found out 2 years after it happened while I was looking through her conversations with her best friend who by the way helped her, she would message me and ask if it was okay they hang out and that’s when she would go see the guy.

We’ve broken up many times and yet I’ve stayed, mainly because she’s used the kids to keep me there until I actually did research and now realize there’s nothing she can actually do to prevent me from seeing our kids. We broke up 2 years ago and we stayed because she wants me to help her become a U.S resident (she’s undocumented) and that’s another reason why I want to help so she can provide for our kids when we split. The thing is she’s always saying she’s not sorry about cheating or she jokes about it when we argue and I just want to know if I’m doing the right thing by helping her or if we should just go our separate ways and let her deal with it on her own.

So yeah, a lot of shit is expensive nowadays right? Hobbies are slowly escalating out of reach with things like PC parts and game consoles skyrocketing year after year. Then I take a peek at some subreddits and threads where people are posting AI generated reaction image after AI generated reaction image. Like dude. You morons are the reason why shit's so expensive nowadays. Wish they could AI generate themselves some braincells but I swear people like this prove that NPCs really do exist and live with us.

My parents, late 60’s, are now old. They do not make much sense and don’t listen to me. My sister doesn’t listen to me, my brother doesn’t, and I’ve found myself being blacklisted by my entire family for health issues I’ve faced that they’re twisted into “_ being dramatic”.

My friends have betrayed me, I don’t have any friends right now because my college friends all moved very far away, and I would say hi to them occationally, but after attepting to live with one years ago, I realized this person only used me to help pay for rent and didn’t respect my boundaries. They, along with the other roommates, would trash the place. We had mice, mold, and stuff everywhere, and I left because I figured we would owe a ton of money in damages to the landlord.

My roommates are weird too. I am living in an apartment with central air, and these mf don’t want it on unless it’s 90 degrees outside. And if I want it on, they want to charge me for it. So I’m like: “why do you LIVE HERE if you don’t want to pay for central air?”

My last job I was working in retail for a bit, just as a side gig, and all of the managers micromanaged the heck out of the new employees. So much so that four people left in two weeks. I wanted to prove I could keep my head down and do a good job, but my boss was an idiot, and kept hounding me for the dumbest stuff. I had two things I needed to do at that job: shelve things and help customers. And she would tell me “why aren't you helping customers” when I was shelving. Or “why aren’t you shelving”. She was just crazy. I was a whistle blower for that store after I left and so many people said they felt so validated by my comments because they were there and went through that too.

I live in the city and I also get to deal with drug addicts that are, for some reason, allowed to camp out in the middle of these four ways, and basically die in front of me. I have no idea why there isn’t a system designed to get these people out of harms way and so the average citizen doesn’t need to see a possible dead person with a needle in their hand on the street. It’s completely terrifying to witness.

I also worked a different job a while ago where I worked with a drug addict. I didn’t know she was an addict til later. She would get high in the middle of her shift and one day I thought she was OD-ing, because she took a nap and wouldn’t wake up. Fortunately, she was okay, but what do you DO IN THAT SITUATION?? Do you call the police and they arrest her for illegal drugs or what?

I’ve been through so much stuff over the last several years and it’s exhausting to feel like I can’t get a break from crazy people. All I want is a normal job, a normal place to live, and normal roommates, but apparently that’s too much to ask for.

This is like my first ever post asking for advice so please don’t be to mean. Okay so I F(20) and my boyfriend M (21) have been dating for 9 months. So basically has of recently i’ve had the suspicion of him cheating on me I decided to go through his phone. In his phone I saw all signs pointing to him cheating like photos, deleted messages,etc. When i confronted him about the cheating i assumed it was with a woman which he adamantly denied ,after of denying for days he admitted to me he sent the photos to a gay friend of his. We talked some (more like begging him to tell me the truth) he said that he sent them out of curiosity and that him and this “friend” barely text. When i asked how they met he told me on tinder , when the “friend” set his gender on the app to female and had matched. But my dilemma is that we also met on tinder. So my thought process is had he been cheating on me this whole time with a man or do i believe him in that they barely talk and it was a one time thing?- Please don’t be mean only reason i’m questioning this is because other than this whole scenario he’s a really great boyfriend super giving, caring, and attentive. I wouldn’t have a problem if he was a bi man considering i’m bi myself i just don’t know how to tell if he’s telling the truth or if I’m my boyfriends dl coverup?

So this is coming from a 16 year old myself, and it honestly breaks my heart that the age of consent is 16 in a majority of states. I even found out a lot of countries have it even lower, which is just sad.

Today I was talking to my older cousin who's 23 now, and she told me about how right when she turned 16, she dated a 21-year-old. And what's crazy is everyone around her totally supported it just because it was technically legal. I always thought most places had strict laws where they allowed a 2-3 year max age gap, but turns out a lot of states don't even have that or they allow huge age gaps.

It just feels gross to me that grown adults can legally date someone my age. Like, we're literally still in high school and can't even legally drink yet. Personally, I think the legal age of consent should be 18 at the bare minimum, but I think 20 is much better as I find it wrong that much older adults are allowed to date someone who is barely even a legal adult.

I know that some teenagers want to date, but I think there needs to be laws for close in age gaps (like a 15 and 16 year old, or a 16 and 17 year old). But a 16-year-old is still a minor under the law, so it makes zero sense that the protection basically stops there and opens them up to adults of any age. Anyone who is a full adult getting with a minor should definitely face consequences for it.

Just talk to me and tell me whatever you want rather than fighting over something I don’t know.

So, I’m 20. I’ve never had a job, and this September I’m starting my second year of university. Around 5th grade, I realized that I was ugly. While my friends grew prettier and more confident every year, nothing changed for me.

Around the same time, I developed social anxiety. Back then, I didn't even understand why I was so terrified of going to school, doing sports, asking questions, or answering in class. Fast forward to now, and I can honestly say nothing has changed, except that instead of three friends, I now only have one. And that last friend seems to be living her absolute best life. She’s friends with most of her course, works, and is constantly out having fun, while I’m just rotting at home alone.

Sorry if this is messy, I’m really emotional right now.

Anyway, about this last "friend" of mine. She seems to like talking to me when she has energy left for me, but whenever we hang out or text, she ONLY talks about her other friends, the events they went to together, or their problems, while I just sit there silently like an object. We’ve been friends since 3rd grade, but she knows nothing about me because I stay silent and she never asks questions. For her birthday, I always know what she likes and what to give her, while she gifts me candies—and they're always the ones I don't even like. I know people might say it’s my fault, but for some reason, I just keep quiet. And when I try to gently bring things up, I just get interrupted. I don't want to cut her off simply because I'm terrified of being completely alone. I have no one else (except my family).

Every single day, I convince myself that I’m worthless. My grades aren't great either. I feel like I don’t even know who I am. I never know what I want in stores, for my birthday, or what clothes to buy. And even if I do want something, I stay silent because I'm scared my parents will judge me.

Sometimes I feel so exhausted and overwhelmed that I just don't want to exist anymore, but I don't even have the courage for that. And after those episodes, I feel guilty for thinking that way, telling myself that other people have bigger problems and I shouldn't be complaining.

I feel like a amoeba that does nothing to change, even though I hate everything about myself. Instead of working on myself, I just cry and whine. No matter how much I scold and curse at myself, I still do nothing.

we (26f 23m) broke up almost 3 years ago. I broke things off because he was incredibly controlling and my rose tinted glasses finally came off and I left. We weren't even together for one year. He begged me to stay as friends and eventually if we could have had a break instead of actually breaking up. I declined the break but naively thought we could keep on being friends.

He decided the way to win me back was by contacting my family and telling them I was suicidal (I had attempted years ago, which my family had trauma over, and he knew that)

He told them I was trying to kill myself/hurt myself and to check on me, saying i was acting weird/ having a psychotic break for leaving him. He then started to lie to our mutual friends. Telling them that I had mental issues and that he was the only one I could depend on, and that I went crazy and left him for no reason.

Which then eventually i found out changed to "Actually I left her" out of nowhere. his story seemed to change with every passing day. I know this because he would vent in a public Discord server with thousands of people about me

I've blocked him everywhere at this point because I'm either getting called houndred of times at night or getting spammed with messages.

After months, I check the server out of pure curiosity and see him still talking about me. He had been with multiple women but admitted that he always thought of me when being with his new partners. Only looked at p*rn with women that look like me. Only thought of me when having intercourse.

This honestly mortified me. I felt sick to my stomach and left the server for good. Then I started to get messages from him. Sweet messages about how much I changed his life, how he will always think highly of me and so on and so on.

I blocked him everytime, but he kept on popping up, reaching out despite me never writing back. Last time this happened was last month and I'm terrified of having any kind of social media where he can identify me.

I even found out from a mutual friend that he had a mental breakdown over me changing the name of one of my spotify Playlist because he thought it was about him.

idk, I just needed to get this off my chest.

I know this might sound like I’m overreacting, but I’m genuinely really scared and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this.

A few months ago, when I was 14–15 years old, I was on OmeTV (an alternative to Omegle). A guy I was talking to started asking me to show my chest. I said no at first, but he kept begging and pressuring me. I don’t know why, but eventually I lifted my shirt slightly (only enough that my stomach and the sides of my undergarments were visible) and I did a “dance” for him, if you know what I mean.

I know this sounds stupid, and I feel really embarrassed about it, but I’m honestly terrified.

The guy told me he was also 15 years old and kept encouraging me to continue. After he was done, he turned off his voice filter and revealed that he was actually around 30 YEARS OLD or something close to that.

I’m really scared because I don’t know if he recorded it, saved it, sent it to anyone, or posted it somewhere. I haven’t received any messages or seen anything related to it, but I still can’t stop worrying about the possibility.

Since then, I’ve changed my Instagram and Snapchat usernames and removed people I don’t know. I’m scared that this could somehow affect my future or follow me forever.

I know I made a mistake, but I was only 14–15 years old. I genuinely regret it, and I’m just really scared and don’t know what to do.