This is an ongoing series exploring what would hypothetically and realistically happen if the plot of PHM was inverted such that Rocky and Grace went to Earth via Blip-A. Factoring in human vices and virtues, questions such as ‘How would Rocky be treated?’, ‘What would be Rocky’s equivalent of “Graceland” on Earth?’, and ‘What else is happening on Earth’? are explored in an analysis-heavy and narrative-light format.
Introduction [Link]
(Part 1): Arrival [Link]
(Part 2): Rockyville Current page
(Part 3): Public (TBD)
(Part 4): Legal (TBD)
(Part 5): Diplomatic / Political (TBD)
(Part 6): Military / Strategic (TBD)
(Part 7): Scientific (TBD)
(Part 8): Economic / Corporate (TBD)
(Part 9): NGOs / Humanities (TBD)
(Part 10): World religions react (TBD)
TL;DR:
· Rocky lives in “Rockyville”, located in either Canada or Australia.
· Rockyville is simultaneously an Eridian habitat, biosafety lab, research facility, diplomatic zone, fortress, public reception area, and town.
· He is a prisoner by thermodynamics and physiology, but not of law and politics.
· Ryland Grace is a permanent staff member and is the most important human at Rockyville. He works and lives on site, and sees Rocky daily.
OFFICIAL NAME:
The official name is the Eridian Diplomatic Research and Habitation Complex (EDRHC). Everyone just calls it “Rockyville” except on legal documents.
WHERE ON EARTH DO YOU PUT AN ALIEN???
The location of Rocky’s new home on Earth must satisfy the following criteria:
- Seismic stability (Not Japan)
- Geopolitical stability (Not Afghanistan)
- Educated workforce (Not the DRC)
- Strong rule of law (Not Somalia)
- Climatically predictable (Not Pakistan)
- Relatively free of natural disasters (Not the Philippines)
- Connected to major logistic nodes (Not Antarctica)
- … yet also detached from major population centers (Not Singapore)
- … yet somehow also routinely accessible to papered visitors (Not the Moon)
- Realpolitik constraint: Not inside of Great Powers due to fear of monopolization (Not USA, China, India, Russia)
Two candidates come close, one edges out the other.
Top Candidate – Canadian Shield, Ontario/Quebec, Canada:
Canada is an odd choice for a world that’s freezing, but hear me out…
It’s pre-engineered for cold weather: Canada is already stupidly fucking cold half the year. Consequently, it has spent the last 100+ years engineering itself around this problem: Building codes, infrastructure design, agricultural practices, emotions and psychology. If it’s -35C / -31F in Winnipeg or Saskatoon, the electricity still works, the water still runs, cars can start even without the aid of engine block heaters, and kids walk to school. In Texas, if it's hit by a snowstorm, such as what happened in 2021: National Guard deployed, highway pileups, blackouts, hundreds of deaths.
Are you safer in a place that is about to experience winter for the very first time, or a place that considers -5C / 23F “A decent day in April”?
Strong Diversification + strategic assets. Canada has a highly diversified economy, an unusually robust primary sector (logging, fishing, mining, etc), and its energy production is also diversified (nuclear, hydroelectric, wind, oil/coal/LNG, geothermal). Therefore, it’s highly resilient to supply chain disruptions. Moreover, Canada leads the world in agro-biotech research (the EXACT skillset you need in the PHM universe). Importantly, it also commands 8% of Earth’s uranium reserves.
If Canada invests in modular nuclear reactor construction and uses its highly educated agro-biotech workforce to work around shorter growth seasons caused by cooling, it could plausibly be a net exporter of food, electricity, oil, LNG, and uranium in 2055 (just as they are net exporters of these goods IRL today). It’s not impossible that a desperate United States would annex Canada for these resources, but Canada could also plausibly dodge that outcome with clever politicking via attractive trade deals, lend-lease agreements, or by manipulating the value of its currency to make annexation unattractive.
Accessible, quarantinable, strong logistics: Rockyville would be in an isolated region of Ontario or Quebec. North of Rockyville is 1000 miles of desolate forest, and south of it is a purpose-built highway branching from the Trans Continental Canadian Highway (the “Trans-can” as locals call it). This branch highway is the only way in or out, and can be closed for quarantine, but also links Rockyville to logistics throughout Canada and the United States. (Limited) sea-based logistics is enabled by the Port of Toronto via St. Lawrence River and Lake Ontario. The closet major international airport would be Pearson International in Toronto, with local airports bringing you closer to site. IRL, temperatures average 25C / 77F in summer to -20C / -4F in winter. In movie, Grace said temperatures will drop by “10 to 15 degrees” (Celsius or Fahrenheit?!), so I assume that actual temperatures when Rockyville construction begins may instead average 10C / 50F to -35C / -31F. As taumoeba goes ‘om nom nom’ upon the astrophage around Venus, temperatures will rise.
Canada is a “middle power”, and every major power has okay-ish or better diplomatic and trade relations with Canada. Canada enjoys exceptionally low geopolitical tension to the point of stereotype. Nonetheless, Canada places Rocky squarely within the American sphere of influence, necessitating at least some political concessions from the United States to China et al. Realistic concessions include workforce percentage guarantees (e.g., 25% of Rockyville scientists must be Chinese nationals), guaranteed scientific access and shared data, foreign media access, or funding reprieves (e.g., “The United States must pay for half of the construction”). Transparent attempts to leverage First Contact for unrelated geopolitical goals, e.g., remove American bases from Taiwan, would likely be rebuffed. As Ryland Grace is American and NASA was dis-proportionally responsible for Hail Mary and ongoing space capabilities, the United States does have enormous diplomatic clout in forcing this option forward.
Second Best Candidate – Western Australian Shield, Australia.
In “Outback Country”, you could alternatively situate Rockyville somewhere within Western Australia (Either Northeast of Perth, closer to the desert, of Southeast of Perth closer to Darling Range). It would be similarly serviced via a purpose-built road from its circumnavigating highway, and East of Rockyville would either be unoccupied desert or an unoccupied region of forest/plains. Freemantle Harbor at Perth would provide better sea-based logistics than Port of Toronto. A major international airport is also in Perth.
Australia enjoys many advantages that Canada also enjoys, such as a diversified economy and variable energy production methods. It also possesses one major strategic advantage by owning 23% of the world’s lithium supply. However, lithium for electric vehicle production is valuable IRL but not as valuable during an astrophage crisis.
Normal temperatures vary from 32-40C / 90-104F in summer to 0-8C / 32-46F in winter (Depending on exactly where you put it..), but during construction would be colder.
Australia, like Canada, is an American ally and a ‘middle power’, but China would prefer this option because it places Rockyville within its hemisphere of influence.
Australia is exactly the sort of country that I would worry about regarding “experiencing winter for the first time” as I’m not sure whether their infrastructure is designed to tolerate prolonged below-freezing temperatures. Canada, in contrast, is.
Nonetheless, if my predictions about Canada surviving in 2055 are total BS, then Australia would be your default option.
If the United Nations Cannot Get Their Shit Together…
Antarctica or artificial island (True neutral / international ground), at exorbitant cost, and with none of the advantages offered by either Canada or Australia.
ROCKYVILLE DESIGN:
FIRST LAYER – HABITAT: Rocky needs 220C and 29 ATM ammonia. To my knowledge…
- The biggest pressure vessel ever built are nuclear reactor containment structures, of about 50,000 m^3 (A one-bedroom apartment is ~80 m^3). However, they handle ~3 ATM.
- The hottest pressure vessel every constructed include gas-cooled nuclear reactors and petrochemical reformers, approaching 1000C. Something like a refinery hydrocracker or an ammonia converter can be ~200 m^3 and 500C.
- The most pressurized pressure vessel are waterjet intensifiers, about 9000 ATM.
Keep in mind that in the numbers cited above, to keep costs at minimum, engineers design for intended use, not for maximum theoretical limit. I think we could realistically build a vessel with ~5,000 to 10,000 m3 at Rocky’s atmosphere and pressure.
This is still nowhere near what Grace received in canonical ending. Graceland appears to be a dome of about 500m in diameter (32,500,000 m^3). This is larger than the three largest buildings on Earth combined: The Boeing Everett Factory (13,300,000 m^3) Tesla’s Gigafactory in Texas (9,570,000 m^3), and France’s Airbus A380 factory (5,600,000 m^3). This Eridian engineering is all the more impressive because it’s easier to build vessels that hold high pressure inside it than to hold high pressures outside it (ask Stockton Rush...).
We are not limited to one container. We can go modular, with hatches linking them ("This one is your office, that one is your bedroom..."). We cannot give him a massive beachfront property like Grace received, but we can give him an outdoor swimming pool and a sizeable back yard. The advantage of modularity is that we can add or swap out containers for retrofits and repairs.
Continuously controlled internal atmosphere and temperature. Radiation shielding. Contains (to the best of our ability) Eridian-styled accommodations and accoutrements. Robotics-mediated exchange of items between Earth and habitat via airlock. Artificial magnetic field to simulate Erid. If we can safely build a window, we would. Some sections of his habitat are private. Vibrating strings (“lights”) so Rocky can sense his environment. Everything works on Eridian time, not the human 24h day.
SECOND LAYER – Biosafety
(EARLY): Biosafety Laboratory Level 5 (Exobiology). The last time we had a “First Contact” event was in 1519, and 90% of the people died. We don’t know whether Rocky bacteria can cause a pandemic, or whether Earth bacteria kill Rocky. We would be maximally paranoid: Imagine a combination of ISS environmental controls with BSL-4 containment (“Try not to rip your suit because the entire room is filled with Argon”). To downgrade, we’d need to test for microorganisms or viruses living on and inside Rocky (carapace, gut microbiome). Similarly, we need to perform ongoing tests of Earth’s microbiome for anything that could survive and reproduce within his environment (Check the extremophiles at Yellowstone...).
(MIDDLE): If we observe that there is no direct threat of infection in either direction, additional questions such as biological pollutants would then be explored (e.g., does Rocky harbor bacteria that could cause an algae-like bloom in our freshwater lakes?). Similarly, we’d want to make sure that nothing on Earth is capable of causing the equivalent of a black mold outbreak on his furniture.
(LATE): If both factors are ruled out, then biosafety can be mitigated to or eliminated entirely.
THIRD LAYER – PUBLIC AND MEDIA ACCESS ZONE: If biosafety precautions are in effect, the only persons who can see Rocky directly are papered and trained personnel. For all other visitors, indirect access to Rocky is enabled via video feed and microphones. If biosafety is dropped, the SECOND and THIRD layer can merge.
FOURTH LAYER – R&D ZONE: The DuBois-Shapiro Memorial Laboratory is dedicated to figuring out critical questions such as “How do we not accidentally kill Rocky?”. Broader R&D efforts, such as untangling the mysteries of xenonite, would be decentralized throughout Earth. Equally important questions include: ‘How do we perform first aid and CPR on an Eridian?”
FIFTH LAYER – INTERNATIONAL DIPLOMATIC ZONE: The offices, hotels, and cafeterias where the world’s politicians and diplomats meet. The Ilyukhina-Li-Jie memorial garden and a cenotaph dedicated to Rocky’s 22 deceased crewmates are found here. Expect constant political bickering: “Why did you block my sociologist from seeing Rocky last week?” and “That’s not what we agreed to in Vienna last year…”
SIXTH LAYER – PERMANENT HOUSING FOR CRITICAL STAFF: Grace lives here.
SEVENTH LAYER – FORTRESS: Grace and Rocky represent single node point of failure for Earth-Erid scientific, cultural, diplomatic exchange. Protecting them both is paramount.
Anti-forest fire clearance zones. Badges. Gates. Anti-drone defenses. Restricted airspace. NORAD blanket. Military airport. Ongoing intelligence threat assessments. Anti-social engineering education. Secondary power generation. Tertiary backup. Rocky’s habitat is controlled by analog – you cannot threaten Rocky’s life with ransomware if everything is dials and levers. Other systems that must be digital are air-gapped (not connected to internet).
EIGHTH LAYER – UNRESTRICTED TOWN: Separated by road and keycard shuttlebus, an unrestricted town containing an information center, a tourist venue with plushies for sale, restaurants, housing for lower security clearance shift workers, and the “Leaky Space Blob Pub“. There’s no live feed – he’s not a zoo exhibit. Imagine standing on a hill looking at a facility in the far distance with a national park info placard diagramming it next to you: “Ohh… he’s in that building way over there…”. This is as close as you can get to Rocky without paperwork. Behind you, a road leads to the main Canadian Highway.
IS ROCKY A PRISONER?
Of laws and politics, no. His lawyers will guarantee it (Part 3), and as will be shown, Earth’s political (Part 4) and military/intelligence (Part 5) leaders are overwhelmingly incentivized to not merely allow his freedom of movement, but to actively promote and facilitate it. Rocky is legally free, and practice follows law.
Of thermodynamics and physiology, yes. He still needs an EVA suit to walk outside, and if he wants to travel anywhere, he’s entirely dependent upon humans for support. We cannot send him back to Erid because interstellar trips are eye-wateringly expensive. There is no "Earth scientists are prepared to send Blip-A home" and "Can I think about it, question?" exchange in this scenario, because we cannot afford to offer it. He’s stuck on Earth, at least for now.
IF ROCKY WANTED TO TEACH CHILDREN, WOULD WE LET HIM?
Yes, and in fact, it would be encouraged (Part 3 and 4). However, we would need to downgrade biosafety first – nose-picking children and “the room is filled with argon” don’t mix. We would make it happen, but not immediately.
CAN YOU SEE ROCKY?
Yes. You’ll need to submit an application form and submit to a criminal background check. If biosafety is in effect, you’ll either need to stay in Layer 3 or take a two-day training course. Equally important: Rocky must also want to meet with you. He gets a lot of visitation requests – too many to entertain them all, unfortunately. Alternatively, you can sign up for a guided tour of the facility. By analogy, the White House is among most restricted places on Earth, yet guided public tours and chance encounters with POTUS are still possible.
The easiest solution is to call or email him. You can email Rocky at [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]). He has a team of secretaries to help him sort through everything as well as to keep Rocky away from Nigerian princes and .exe attachments. Simple messages like “You rock, Rocky!” would get a courtesy response, analogous to how IRL the Office of the President sends you a courtesy letter if you invite POTUS to your birthday party. Rocky responds when he can, but emails pile up. His secretaries can help you schedule a Zoom call if he agrees to meet with you, but be aware that it could be scheduled at 3am.
