Hey guys! 18Male finally met with my 18F girlfriend and we had the best 3 days ever! It's worth it guys! Went roller skating and sat by the lake for hours just enjoying each others companies

I don’t normally post here but decided hey why not!! I 21F and my boyfriend 23M finally met after a year of being long distance 🩷. OH! And he got me a promise ring 🥹!!

I've (25f) been at his (26m) place for a few days and I told him "if we played roblox and you died in a game, I would spend robux to rev you" and he said "what about snapchat streak" and I said no. Then he told me that he's spent money on it multiple times!!! I thought the streak was reviving on its own because he sends the streak within a certain time frame, but I guess he's just been spending a dollar every single time?!!? And when I asked him why, he said "I know you would be sad if it died" and oml I am so lucky :') maybe mundane and silly to a lot of people, but I've never had anyone be so kind and understanding to me and I wanted to share how sweet this is.

Realized I had updated on the discord but never provided an update here. My husband and I finally closed the distance for good at the beginning of this month. We were long distance from February 2020 until July 2026 - 6 years and 10 trips!

We met through a mutual online friend while playing Dead by Daylight and quickly grew fond of each other. The pandemic restrictions kept us from meeting until nearly 2 years into our relationship. It's wild to look back and realize everything we went through to be together, and I imagine it'll continue to be a hell of a tale to tell friends, family, maybe children someday.

We married in June 2024 knowing that we'd apply for me to move to Sweden once my husband secured a permanent employment contract and suitable apartment. We were able to apply for my residence permit last December and received our approval in March of this year following my interview at the Swedish Embassy in Washington, DC. It took a few months to sell my house and line up all of the logistics, but I moved here earlier this month with my 3 cats.

I am so looking forward to seeing how our life is now that we can build it together in-person! And I want to thank the folks in the discord server who were always wonderful company, especially when I was going through the heartaches of airport goodbyes. I hope everyone here is able to see the distance end. Happy to answer any questions on the process too! ❤️

Hi everyone! I’m looking for some advice from people who have been in a “short”-distance relationship.
For some context, we’ve been together for 10 months and are really happy together. We live about a two-hour drive apart (I’m in London and he’s near Birmingham), and we both have our own cars, so travelling isn’t too difficult. Reading this sub has made me realise we’re actually pretty lucky compared to a lot of couples, but we still have our own challenges and I’d love to hear how other people have navigated them.

Quick context:
❤️ We’ve been together for 10 months.
🚗 We live about a two-hour drive apart (I’m in London, he’s near Birmingham).
🚙 We both have cars, so travelling is relatively easy.
📅 We usually see each other every other weekend, from Thursday evening to Sunday night.
😊 Overall, we’re really happy together. I’m mostly looking for advice from people who’ve been in a similar “short-distance” relationship and how you navigated things like scheduling, closing the distance, and mismatched sex drives.

Scheduling
How often did you see each other?
At the moment, we usually see each other every other weekend, from Thursday evening until Sunday night.
Part of me would love to see each other more often, but it’s difficult balancing everything else. I have quite a big friendship group, and because most of my friends live about an hour away, weekends are usually when we catch up. I don’t really see them during the week, so I sometimes feel like I’m choosing between spending time with my boyfriend and maintaining my friendships.
Moving in together
I tend to move quite quickly in relationships. My ex and I moved in together after about six months, so I know my sense of timing might not be the most objective!
I’m definitely keen to close the distance eventually, but it’s complicated. I currently rent in London and genuinely love living here, whereas my boyfriend owns his home in a smaller town near Birmingham. Financially, moving into his place would make the most sense because I don’t have a deposit saved (thanks, London rent 😅), but it would also mean leaving a city and lifestyle that I really enjoy.
How did you know it was the right time to close the distance? Did one person end up making the bigger compromise, and how did you decide whose location made the most sense?
Sex
This one is a little more personal, but I’m curious whether anyone else has experienced this.
I’d say my sex drive is higher than my boyfriend’s. We both have ADHD, and I think that contributes to me having a bit of a scarcity mindset around sex. Because I know we won’t see each other again for another two weeks, I find myself wanting sex almost all the time when we’re together because it feels like I need to make the most of the time we have.
We usually have sex two or three times over the four days we’re together, which I know is objectively a healthy amount, but emotionally I still find myself wishing it were more because of the gap between seeing each other.
Has anyone else struggled with that feeling? If so, did it get easier over time?
I’d love to hear how other couples have navigated any of these things. Thanks in advance!

Yoooo guys look at this
My girlfriend from Korea sent a lot of snacks to me and the toy. We met 7 months ago and very soon we gonna spend an amazing time in Seoul cuz I’ll fly to her! I sent the parcel first but it’s still coming to Korea so when it’s finally there, I’ll make a post and show u what exactly I sent to her

I met my partner in person and they’re the sweetest most kindest person i’ve ever met. But i’m so embarrassed to be next to them. I physically am not attracted in the slightest bit them and I feel so bad. We had been online friends for a while and I fell for them because they had always made me laugh but finally seeing them in person is eating me alive. Before anyone ask we had FaceTime before but they were always in a dark room only zoomed into their face. They’re really sweet and I feel incredibly conflicted. I fell for them because they’ve always been so kind towards me but I want to be a little physically attracted towards them. If anyone can give me advice on how I can go about this it’s greatly appreciated.

Small background Im in the us and my boyfriend is in Iraq I have low spectrum autism and I struggle with picking up on certain cues and struggle with being emotional. My boyfriend is going through a difficult time with lots of hard work and he's being stretched so thin by everything around him and i don't know how to help him, it breaks my heart to see him so upset and I wish I could be there for him in the way he needs and deserves. I need advice on how to properly comfort him and how to make him feel listened to. He's studying constantly and I can see it destroying him and Id do anything in the world to aid him in it, our time difference plus his bedtime limits the amount of time we have left to spend anyway (averaging around 1hr - 30 minutes) im sorry if this is formatted wrong or anything

I'm so frustrated right now! We've been counting down our next visit for 3 months already, we finally got to the day of my travel and we could both barely sleep the night before (y'all know how it is). I'm meant to have an 8 hour flight, a short layover, and then another 9 hour flight. I should have been in his arms 5 hours ago. Should have. Instead I'm sitting in a hotel in Abu Dhabi because my first flight arrived late 🙃 I have to stay for a whole 24 hours until the next flight. Without my bag with clean clothes, sigh. AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH.

When I arrived at the hotel last night near midnight the outside temperature was 46 degrees because of the humidity, and now it's 48 🫠🫠 I couldn't get my glasses to unsteam hahaha. I'm hiding in the hotel room until the airline comes to get us (I feel very fortunate that they provided a hotel).

Our visit together is only a week and we already lost a day. I'm so sad. Can I sulk and cry at you all for a moment and say IT'S UNFAIR 😖

Hello guys I need some advice

Me and my girlfriend are long distance and sometimes we have intimate moments late in the evening when we are both in bed. she told me loves to take the lead because she loves pleasuring me with saying dirty stuff and sending explicit images or videos. Today she told me she wants me to take the lead because theres quite some moments where she stops pleasuring herself and doesnt finish after I would finish. What are some things i can do or say to help or talk her through it so can she can actually feel really satisfied?
I hope someone here can take this post serious and can help me with some solutions
thanks in advance <3

Give me your views... Me and my girl have been dating for over a year.. and after 6 months of relationship we had to shift to long distance. Now I haven't met with her after that... Now for over a month I've started feeling that we are getting too distant. Give me your views on what might be the reason behind that...

Let me tell you she's a working woman and says she's too busy with the work mostly.

hi reddit… throwaway because my own ex knows my main

I (33 f) am in a long dist relationship with another woman (28 f) who is room mates with her ex, a man whose age I dont know but he is a probably my age

they were friends before they dated and now still live together while I live a few hours away… my girlfriend and insee each other almost every other weekend wehn i drive there to see her and her ex is always there

I have been trying really hard to get over them being friends because they have their own little language and are constantly joking with each other and I feel like flirting too even when she and i are in calls together… my girlfriend promises they are just friends now and that he is moving out in january but sometimes i just feel uncomfortable with how close they are

can anyone else who has been in this situation help me feel better about them really just being friends? is it possible? can she really have moved on from him but still be his best friend?

she is pan and i am her first actual girlfriend but shes been with girls before… i have only ever dated girls

So my soon to be ex bf, compared me to 5 other girls in our relationship. I have also noticed he is crazy defensive about this one girl Anna. And also he recently admitted to creating a fake made up scenario about having sex with a female friend lyn (I am changing the names for privacy) which was one of the girls he made me feel insecure about. He knew what he was doing and even lied to his therapist and put an act of “misunderstood loyal bf” in front of his friends and family.

There’s multiple things I noticed he failed to do, especially in the last 3 months we were fighting. He was asked to make a compliment book (ye i m really pathetic to beg for compliments) what not. He hasn’t done it. He was asked to send pics, he didn’t. His excuse was he needs to call gregor to talk about how to fix us. Odd, he knows what needs to be done and he is asking a very (I have no nice way to say this) dumb friend who says stuff life “I think you are adopting your perspective. Sometimes we believe what others say and that may not be true” despite their being chat proofs but ok. He has friends who support him and also call out his bad behaviour. And then he has enablers and really messed up people like gregor. So why will he ask him for advice? Well guess what, I just found out he was playing zombie games with him :)) ye there is no way on earth I m taking him back.

Cut to present, after he cried a river to his sister. As if all of these fights aren’t happening cause he can’t stop lying and gaslighting, she decided to send him to a psychiatrist ward for a week. Before going he decided he will take accountability and distance himself from the 2 girls he has been comparing me to. The message he showed me he will send is “I compared you to my gf and so I must block you” , the one he sent was “I compared you to my gf and she is insecure and so I must block you” ……

I have no words left. I have understood he has always been trying to change the narrative of this looking a toxic relationship when in reality this lovely bf of almost 9 months has never even planned a single date or complimented or even given flowers or anything that sort of. While he leached so many cards, gifts, care of sending him to doctor, interview prep. What not. You name it.

But I seriously don’t know how to wrap my head around, how a sane person will add the word “insecure” about his gf to the girls he has been comparing me to.

My boyfriend and I met on a video game last year and have been in a long-distance relationship since. We’ve met up a few times in person and are supposed to see each other next month. He’s currently away on a spontaneous trip visiting family with no set return date. I want him to enjoy himself, but his absence has made me realize how dependent I’ve become on him.
I don’t think my attachment is toxic—in an LDR, relying on daily calls and check-ins is normal, and without them, the distance feels massive. But the real issue is that I have literally no one else.
Before him, I had so many friends. I played games, socialized online, and had a solid group. When we started dating, I voluntarily cut off my male friends to respect the relationship. Shortly after, my boyfriend made it clear he was uncomfortable with my female friends and the social games I played. He openly disliked my friends, so to keep the peace and prioritize him, I cut them off too. Now, he’s my only social outlet.
The problem is, he’s stopped putting in effort. The sweet things he used to do are gone. He doesn't compliment me, doesn't show affection unless we're in person, and gets annoyed if I try to talk through things. Our conversations are dry. He doesn't even keep me updated anymore—I found out he was leaving for his current trip just an hour before his train, and when I ask when he's returning, he just says "idk."
I feel so lonely. I fill my days with tasks, but as soon as I'm home, the void hits me. I never felt this way when I was single because I was surrounded by friends.
I'm at a loss. Do I end things and focus on rebuilding my friendships and my own life, or is this something I should try to fix and hope the spark comes back?

Me and my girlfriend started dating a little over a year ago. We live about 600 km apart, but luckily there are easy train connections, so I get to see her at least once a month.

A few months into our relationship, I made a mistake. I lied about something I never should have lied about. The truth itself wasn’t even bad—it was just something I struggled to talk about. We eventually worked through that.

Not long after, I went into a full burnout from work. It got so bad that I became more and more absent in our relationship. She supported me through everything and never expected much from me until I was doing better.

Once I started recovering, we began arguing about things we both felt were missing in the relationship. Looking back, I realized I had developed a huge communication problem. Instead of actually listening to what she was saying, I was so focused on finding the “right” answer that I wasn’t really present in the conversation. It got to the point where I’d ask her what she had eaten two minutes after she’d already told me. Naturally, she started feeling unheard.

She communicated this to me many times, and I tried to work on it. But instead of focusing on understanding her perspective, I kept focusing on my own feelings and intentions. That only led to more arguments because she continued to feel unheard, unseen, and unloved. Looking back now, I honestly feel like that’s on me.

At one point, she asked me to do something thoughtful for her. I completely messed that up too because I didn’t remember the small details that would have made it meaningful. Again, I was so busy trying to do the “right” thing that I forgot what actually mattered.

Eventually, we stopped talking for a few weeks. I used that time to genuinely work on the things she had been asking from me. When I reached out again, I wrote her a letter. At the time, I was between jobs and didn’t have much money, so I convinced myself that a letter was all I could do. Looking back, I realize that was partly an excuse. I could have found other ways to show her how much she meant to me.

She gave me another chance to show that I had changed. I truly have been working on myself, but she wasn’t willing to call or meet in person until she felt confident she wouldn’t have to “think for two” anymore—meaning she didn’t want to keep carrying the emotional responsibility for both of us or constantly tell me how to be a good partner.

So we started texting. For two or three days, I tried to show more interest by asking follow-up questions because, honestly, I didn’t know how else to show I had changed through text. Unfortunately, that backfired. To her, it felt performative, like I was only acting differently to win her back. I understand why she felt that way. All I really showed was that I was capable of having a basic conversation.

Now she’s given me 24 hours to convince her that this relationship is worth continuing. I know we both still want this to work, but she needs to believe that I can truly be a partner and not someone she has to guide through every step of the relationship.

The problem is, I’m completely lost. I don’t know how to prove that within 24 hours. My first thought was to travel to see her with a thoughtful gift, but she specifically asked me not to do that.

I really love her, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to fix what I’ve broken and continue growing as a person and as a partner.

Does anyone have any advice on how I should approach this situation?

LDR couples with crazy busy schedules and work deadlines: How do you plan creative, low-effort date nights that don't involve cooking or staring at a movie screen?

I’m 17M and my girlfriend is 18F. We’ve been dating long-distance for a couple of months.

I struggle with trust in general, not only with her. Even when someone hasn’t done anything wrong, my mind sometimes creates worst-case scenarios. I’m trying to work on it because I know it affects my relationship.

Sometimes my overthinking gets so strong that I feel like breaking up, not because I don’t love her, but because I feel like leaving would protect me from getting hurt.

My situation also makes it harder. If my relationship or chats became known by the wrong people, I could get into serious trouble. Some of my cousins know about her, and I worry that someone could try to cause problems or use our relationship against me.

Recently, there was an Instagram situation. Where my cousin texted her which she didn’t tell me until i noticed that he was following her. And she also stalked my best friend. She told me she wasn’t allowed to make an account using her own email, so an online long-distance friend created one for her. During an argument, she gave me the password, but I never logged in. The next day she said she couldn’t access the account anymore because that friend changed the password. She said the friend blocked her long ago, so she couldn’t contact her to reset it, and she made a new account.

I don’t know if I should trust her explanation or if my anxiety is making me suspicious of something normal.
Overall, she has been good to me and tries in the relationship. I don’t want to accuse her, but I also don’t know how to stop my mind from creating scenarios.
How do you know the difference between real red flags and trust issues?

How do you learn to trust someone in a long-distance relationship?

How do you stop needing proof that someone won’t hurt you?

Im interested how you all do little gestures for each other?

My boyfriend for example is a landscaper and sends me daily photos of flowers he comes across. I send him my favorite quotes from my current history papers I work on.

Does this sound like enough? I’ve never done long distance before and I really want this to work!

Thank you all for answers ❤️

Hi everyone,

30F here,

​I’m looking for some insights and success stories from people who met their partner online while living far apart and eventually transitioned from long-distance to marriage.

​A bit of context:

I’m preparing to move back abroad in about 3–4 months. I previously lived there for three years, but it was a really isolating experience—I was in a poorly connected city, dealing with a financial crunch, and mostly renting rooms with families to ensure a clean, quiet living space. Coming back home for a break made me realize how much that loneliness affected me.

​I really want this next chapter to be different. I’m considering setting my location on Hinge to my destination city now so I can start connecting with people ahead of time. The idea is to talk, get to know each other over calls for these next few months, and then meet up in person once I arrive to see if there’s genuine real-world chemistry.

​For those who have been through this and made it work long-term:

1)​How long were you talking/dating long-distance before your first in-person meeting?

2)​Looking back, what was the "sweet spot" timeline for meeting in real life without building up idealizations or burning out on video calls?

3)​Any advice or red flags to watch for when using dating apps across different locations before a move?

​Would love to hear your experiences, timelines, and advice.

Thanks in advance!