r/OCPoetry Mar 09 '22

Welcome to OCP -- PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING

504 Upvotes

TL;DR You need to give feedback on two other poems before you can share your own poem, and then put links to that feedback in your post. If you don't know how to give feedback, read the guide. Reusing feedback links will result in a ban.

Heyo, welcome to OCpoetry. (That’s “original content” if you don’t know). This is a place for sharing and getting feedback on your own poems. We are the sister subreddit of r/Poetry, which is for sharing and discussing published poetry. Our goal is to create a place where anyone can learn to become a better creative writer, kind of like a free online writer's workshop.

This post is an orientation to the subreddit. If you’re new, read this before sharing your work. If you’re less new, then read this anyways, as it has a few changes to how we've done things in the past. If you’ve still got questions after reading this post, please send a modmail. There are some FAQs at the end of this post which will be updated as we go. We also have a huge and very disorganized wiki containing all of our resources, essays on how to write poetry and historic writing prompts, I recommend you check it out.

So, here’s basically how it works:

This subreddit works on a pay-it-forward system. If you want to share a poem, you need to give feedback to two others from this subreddit. This ensures that everyone gets some readers and hears some response, rather than just shouting their verses into the void. If you don’t think you’re up to writing feedback for others just yet, we recommend you check out r/Justpoetry or r/Poems, where there are no requirements for sharing your work.

1. All posts must include two links to recent feedback.

Every post must contain two unique links to your comments where you have provided feedback on this subreddit within the past two weeks. Feedback links cannot be reused for multiple post or reposts of old poems. All posts without feedback links will be removed, without notice by our subreddit robot so make sure they are included in your initial post -- you cannot post with the intent to add them later.

But, how do I get the links to my feedback comments?

That kind of depends on what platform you're on. If you're on desktop or on a third-party mobile app, there should be a 'share' or 'permalink' link underneath every comment on Reddit. Clicking on that should give you a unique URL to your comment. Just copy + paste that into the body of your post.

If you're on the official Reddit app, you'll have to click 'share' on the comment and choose the 'Copy URL' option, paste that into your notes with the body of your poem. Then copy and paste the entire thing into a new post on the Reddit app.

2. At least one of your comments should be on a poem that has received no other comments.

This ensures that everyone has a chance to get a few reads and hopefully some decent feedback. If for whatever reason you can’t find any lonely poems, then comment on the poem that seems to have received the least amount of feedback. The easiest way to do this is to sort posts by new.

3. Feedback must be high-effort.

High-effort means different things to different people. It does not mean “super long” or “expert quality”. But it does mean doing more than the bare minimum.

You don't have to complement, criticize, or try to figure out the "deeper meaning". You should try to notice your own reactions and explain them as best as you can. If you want to explain your interpretation or summary of the piece, you can and this is often helpful to the writer. If the poem made you laugh or cry, feel bored, confused or nostalgic — say so, and then explain why you think it did. A good rule of thumb is that each of your feedback comments should be at least a short paragraph.

We understand that giving other writers feedback on their creative work can feel a bit artificial or uncomfortable, if you’ve never done it before. That’s why we’ve written a feedback guide for beginners. There are more feedback guides linked in the FAQ below. You should also read some of the other feedback comments around the sub to get a feel for what works for others. Poems that link to low-effort feedback, and low-effort comments themselves, will be removed at mod discretion, or if you report it to us. However, we’re less interested in policing you and more interested in helping you grow as readers and writers. We are more likely to ask you follow-up questions, than remove your work entirely. The mods skulk the comments sections and will ask follow-up questions on comments that seem a little thin, and please answer those questions if you get any.

4. Please Be Kind.

Treat each other with kindness and respect. The mods have an incredibly strict definition for each of these concepts. We will proactively remove comments and poems and ban users that make others feel unwelcome or unsafe. Your right to creative expression does not extend to poetry that promotes misogyny, homo/trans/queerphobia, racism, etc. If your poetry’s especially violent or covers sensitive subjects, please label it with the NSFW tag or a content warning in the title. Harsh criticism is allowed -- encouraged, really -- as long as you’re being harsh on the poem, not the person. Remember that the narrator (or the “speaker”) of the poem is not necessarily the author.

5. Audio, video, and image poems are allowed; but the text of the poem must be included in the body of the post.

This is so that people can still enjoy your poem if they're unable to view or listen to your link for whatever reason.

6. You may include a link to your poetry blog at the end of your post.

Or your instagram, or your personal creative project, or your soundcloud, or your Etsy page. As long as it's poetry-adjacent that's cool with us. Just don't get spammy.

Attempting to dodge any of these rules, or abuse directed towards moderators enforcing these rules, will earn you an immediate ban.

FAQs

What do the Poem & Workshop flairs do?

They simply allow you to show your intentions and expectations for the piece you are posting. The Poem flair is for sharing a piece, with the expectation of receiving mostly surface-level feedback and general advice. The Workshop flair is for a piece that you really want to work on, something you want to pick apart and analyse. It signals that you are open to discussing the piece, and that you invite strong critique.

How do I format my poetry on Reddit?

The following is advice for formatting in Markdown. Two spaces at the end of a line gives you a line break.
Type two spaces at the end of a line, then hit enter twice for a stanza break.

Three dashes "___" will give you a line through the post.


Type two spaces to create an empty line,

so you can get lines

that look like this.

 Four spaces before each line will allow you 
to format however you like, this is 'code block' 
       in the Fancy Pants editor. 

one asterisk before and after a piece of text will give you italics, two asterisks for bold.

Can I print one of these poems out/use it on my instagram with my art/put it in my book?

Ask the author. Part of what makes this space a useful workshop space is that everyone feels safe to share their stuff; if people start using poetry without the author's permission, or god forbid, trying to pass off another artist's work as their own, the userbase of this sub will feel less safe to do so. Please, ask the author, and then do what they say.

I'm thinking about trying to get my poem published somewhere. What should I do?

The standard thing is to find a literary journal. There are a zillion literary journals and magazines all over the world. They have different themes, tastes, styles, audiences, readerships, levels of prestige. Some charge fees for submission, some do not, some will pay you if you get accepted, some don't, some will give you feedback, some won't let you know anything for months. So first you'll want to pick a few of your poems, get some feedback from some trusted readers (or from here, of course) and then start looking for a journal that's a good home for your work. Most lit journals have submissions periods where they accept all the work for their next issue, and then sift through everything they get.

You will probably get a lot of rejections. This is normal. It's kind of a numbers game. You can submit the same poem to multiple journals as long as the journal says something like "simultaneous submissions are allowed". If you do get accepted, congrats! Most journals want 'first publication rights' or 'first serial rights' or something similar, so that means you'll have to tell all the other journals you submitted that poem to that you've been published elsewhere. (For that reason we strongly recommend deleting your poem from reddit if you want to submit it to a journal -- technically and legally speaking, writing a post on reddit is still considered publishing your work, and reddit owns all the text on the site.)

Here are some places to get you started looking for journals:

Duotrope and Submittable are two apps that help you search for journals, and help you track what poems you've submitted to which places. Submittable is free, Duotrope is not. They are GREAT.

Poets & Writers has a list of lit journals, small presses, and writing contests. This is a great place to start. They also have a newsletter listing all the presses and journals going into their submissions period.

I'd also check out r/literarycontests, if you fancy yourself as a prize winning poet.

A few poetry podcasts

I thought I might include a few podcasts that helped me learn a little more about the history and craft of poetry, as well as find some good poets to read. All of these are available on Spotify, as well as many other platforms.

The New Yorker Poetry Podcast

A poet reading and discussing a poem from the New Yorker archives, as well as one of their own pieces. A great place to find good poetry and hear some discussion of craft. The earlier episodes are with Paul Muldoon, who is delightful.

The Faber Poetry Podcast

Two poets read and discuss their work, with plenty of talk about craft. As well as lots of poems sent in from authors across the world. They really get shoulder-deep into it, which is always wonderful to hear.

In Our Time

A group of experts are brought together to discuss a subject over forty-five minutes. This isn’t strictly a poetry podcast, but there are hundreds of episodes on poets and poems of the past. I highly recommend the episode on The Green Knight with Simon Armitage.

Homemade projects and useful links to our Wiki

The best of OCP

Collections of work from OCP, selected from the top karma earners of that year.

Year 1-3
Year 4 Year 5
Year 6

We/R/Poetry

A homemade journal created by the users and moderators of OCP.

Volume one
Volume two

Guides on the craft from our Wiki

Created by moderators of OCP through the years.

Poetry Primer
Bad Poetry
The Body Poetic
Poetry Hacks
A Brief History of Rhyme


r/OCPoetry 54m ago

Feedback Please a clock unwound

Upvotes

A clock unwound, undone, uncoiled
someday, sometime, I’ll hear it chime
vast dreams from yesterday, all foiled
somewhere there rings an echoed rhyme
a yoke dragged on through tracts of soil
who tolled the knell, was there more time?

to prise and wrest, to sit bereaved
a dam deluged by lies assumed
bisect and cede, to this I cleaved
enmeshed, ensconced, entrapped, entombed
wrought by such dearth unearthed, deceived
a visage faded, yet exhumed

a house now aged, bricks under vine
the joy, the love, the strained belief
which dulls the glow of this lost shrine
where memories lie on every leaf
the streams won’t flow, the sun won’t shine
all swept away, the grief, the grief

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/4aulfZ5zUt

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/zG13ugZrRT


r/OCPoetry 1h ago

Feedback Please san francisco

Upvotes

the shadow
the future 
the wrinkles 
came a lot faster
wasted 
down
screaming memories
dandelions 
chlorine 
take me back to a place 
when i cared
where i loved you 
until i was numb
stumbling  
the times quicker 
the world is shining 
my heart got stuck in a vase, 
incubated, 
then carried its belongings
across the USA 
just to find my eyes kept shrinking
the presence of the woman i look up too
lost 
performing eternally
blind 
angry 
jealous
the bike flying  
these thoughts 
are an ugly orchestra
stuck from a time before i could speak
but tried desperately to for five years
i should have stayed

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/3KQLj5qQ6f

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/Yy6oE3uZyQ


r/OCPoetry 2h ago

Feedback Please Out of my control

3 Upvotes

I miss the time when your actions didn't feel as unpredictable

as the wind on a stormy day.

I miss when your presence made me feel safe,

and not like I was standing in a thunderstorm,

never knowing when the lightning would strike.

I miss when your calls had meaning,

like the trees give life through the air they create.

But just like nature, you're out of my control.

So I sit inside, like on a snowy day,

overflowing with nostalgia

for the sun that once shone.

__________________________________________________

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/gbwiLSJKsh

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/jI8EyFxWW8


r/OCPoetry 2h ago

Just Sharing Just A Dress

3 Upvotes

A dress is a simple thing.
Yet it is not.

It is cloth,
yet so much more.
It represents.
It clothes.
It warms.
It protects—sometimes.

It shines.
It glitters.
Sometimes not.

It’s long.
It’s short.
Tight, or flowy, or flouncy.

Is it beautiful,
or is it a cage?
A representation of the past?

Can a dress be anything other than a dress?

Is a woman wearing a dress
a step forward
or a step back?

Is it feminine,
or is it bold?
Is it safe,
or taunting?

When a woman wears a dress,
does it mean she is going back to the home?
Or does it mean
she is simply wearing a dress—
a dress that is beautiful,
something she desires?

A dress is cloth,
fabric,
plastic—
and yet not.

For some,
the representation clouds
the mind.

Such a simple thing—
this dress.

Oh, why can’t it be
just a dress—
something beautiful to wear?

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3od71/comment/oz5lnqg/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=2&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3s2i6/comment/oz5ggtn/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=mweb3x&utm_name=mweb3xcss&utm_term=2&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 1h ago

Feedback Please My Lady

Upvotes

Around my lady’s throat,
there lies a silver chain,
on which there hangs a crimson stone,
from which I must refrain,

from leaning over gently,
to take it on my tongue,
wet lips wrapped tight round crystal glass,
Her head is backwards flung.

A soft, delicious suckling,
my servile eyes on Her,
shaking hands caress Her waist,
my eyes, devoted, blur.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/8X6HoCPGPA

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/9uqN2pBBVA


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Feedback Please Inner child shine

3 Upvotes

She awakens to the silence she is allowed to exist

The world is boisterous, clumsy and incomplete

A laughing mountain, her voice like a song 

humming the melodies, words of creation

She opens herself from the chest first

Like a present to the world

Unguarded and vulnerable, heart exposed

Feeling the absolute temperatures of emotion

Shunned by that radiant hope

That turned the inner child sour

Now it seeks the sun

To see to sweeten and shine

Slow healing of the child within

Blessings of light surround it

Still sour but bright like a kumquat

Dip them in manuka honey

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3mbik/comment/oz4keo6/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3le9w/comment/oz4lxz1/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 3h ago

Feedback Please The Fifth

2 Upvotes

An unseen dimension beyond
space and time.
every possible version of
reality
at once
it all exists

always all ways

not a direction
you move through
a field of possibility

All outcomes.
All moments.
All selves.
coexisting 
simultaneously

never directly perceive
A place we can only describe
never directly perceive

simultaneously 
coexisting 
All selves. 
All moments. 
All outcomes.

a field of possibility 
you move through 
not a direction

always all ways

it all exists
at once
reality
every possible version of
space and time.
An unseen dimension beyond 

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3pqcj/comment/oz4wmh8/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3olkj/comment/oz504ce/


r/OCPoetry 7m ago

Just Sharing Tuesday Morning

Upvotes

Confidence.
  ..and self-doubt..

People picked up
on your shallowness far
quicker than you imagined.

  Confidence.
...but there was always
the worry of, "Will I ever
  be good enough?"

    Confidence?
They say just be your
    self and you'll do fine.

..but what If you know yourself?
Your skiddish mannerisms, your persistant
hesitation, your constant uncertainty...

Like the pins of a Voodoo doll.
  was confusion and immediate
disinterest, all I had to offer?!

!?What was it?!
    Where was it??

ǝɔuǝpᴉɟuoƆ
You Never Loved a women for herself,
only for her gifts and what she
has to offer...

Confidence... It hurts,
doesn't it? Knowing you've adopted the
mindset of a Cold-hearted machine,
never to feel worth
or the warmth of true compassion
because your too preoccupied Performing,
not looking Bad, Giving people something to
judge...

confidence.
You worry too much. Your insecurities are
deafening! It never helped making others
understand.

Confidence!!!!
within the span of twenty-three minutes, you
could flush it all away–
her wanting to know you! flirt with you! be
with you!..

Negligence.
O' how I rejected the sorrow,
but I've grown too comfortable here
and now
I call this place home

 


comment 1
comment 2


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Feedback Please shapeshifter

3 Upvotes

i’m no stranger to the engine roar

that scores my bolting thoughts.

my hands wringing in my lap,

too damp to grip my seat,

i can only stare ahead.

the scenery, distant and blear

it pulls me into a trance

and when it floods my peripheral,

i’ve crossed the line of no return.

i befriend the flora and fauna

the solar might, the crops’ order

how people eat and work and play

i project my life into theirs,

a shapeshifter stumbling upon kin

i am one with this territory

i am a citizen of this town

the steering wheel jolts away

forsaking my precious town!

the scenery morphs into another

my vision blurs, my sight shifting

into another distant and blear view

i find myself alien again

the whirling engine deafening my thoughts,

i can only stare ahead.

-

this is my first poem in 4 years, so i'm aware it's not that great. that being said, don't hesitate to give me some feedback, it'd really help me out :D

-

1 / 2


r/OCPoetry 23m ago

Feedback Please Grief poem - all comments welcome!

Upvotes

The sentence that

The sentence that hits a nerve.

The sentence that makes your heart drop.

The sentence that reminds you.

The sentence that makes your brain stop.

The sentence that feels purposeful.

The sentence that you know was an accident.

The sentence that you wonder whether they realised that hurt.

The sentence that still remains prominent.

The sentence that couldn't be helped.

The sentence that could have been avoided.

The sentence that takes you back to a past moment.

The sentence that makes you feel disappointed.

The sentence that makes you angry.

The sentence that makes you want to scream.

The sentence that makes you want to cry.

The sentence that makes you wish this was all a dream.

The sentence that makes you wonder if this will ever hurt less?

The sentence that confirms you are powerless.

-------

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/F6o0dkqEHm

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/bWtlwLoJ74


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Feedback Please Punchline Chirp

2 Upvotes

I want to make you belly laugh
but my Punchline flew away
That damn bird stole my riddle
now he headlines on Broadway

He flies across the stage spinning emotion
Casting it out in a wide net
Capturing the dumbfounded
making us belly laugh

His one bird act just doubled
Pulled himself out of a hat
Now there's two birds chirping
Witty, jesting com-pun-ions

It flipped and flopped skipping to the top
brimming with the springtime
Birding into mammal
Horsing clippity clop

One final act for the night
Unstable steeds merge back together
What do you call a slipper that has
two eyes, eight legs, one tail
and can outrun your very thought?

Written in collaboration with my good friend the duke.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3f5mx/comment/oz4uq07/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3hu9x/comment/oz4oefr/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Feedback Please Self-Harm

2 Upvotes

Love is self-harm.

You cut yourself.
You torment yourself.
You agonise yourself.
You cut people.
You cut your desires.
You keep on cutting.

Until one day,
there is nothing left to cut.

Then you realise
you cut your friends,
their plans,
your own self,
your own interests.

For whom?

Did I ever tell you…

Love is self-harm.

Not because it asks you to bleed,
but because it convinces you
that bleeding is another way of loving.

You don’t notice the wounds
until everyone else has left
and you’re the only one
still holding the knife.

Love is self-harm.

By the time you put the knife down,
there is nothing left
that remembers
who you were
before you started cutting.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/QolYiuTqOJ

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/93ui9c6E2m


r/OCPoetry 6h ago

Feedback Please A sleepless dream

3 Upvotes

I still sleep with my feet angled
To the middle of the bed
In hopes to feel yours

And when I’m half asleep
Half living
Half hearted beating
I swear I felt them!

But with every sunlight comes
A Dark reminder-
It’s just a dream
A sleepless dream
Forever desired
Internally incomplete

A real, damm dream
The kind you can never forget
A story to tell your kids.
Please, tell your kids
Of a dream that now, will forever
Be
Just a dream

Held captive in a mind’s deepest corner
Prying to get out
Forced to stay within
Waiting to be again
Like a ghost fighting to breathe
Without the lungs he was given

Until that day comes
I sit here

And just keep

———————————

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/3pCKt5DHgo

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/WQOdYoxr99


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Poetry Contest Burried Alive

2 Upvotes

One of the hardest funerals a person will ever attend is the burial of someone who is still alive.

We bury them deep within our hearts not the person as they truly are, but the image of them that once existed in our minds, an image slain by the harsh realities of human nature. We imagined someone full of innocence, only for that innocence to be wounded by the faults committed by their own hands.

God sends us lessons through our trials with others. And as much as I would love to preserve the image of that innocent person within my heart, perhaps it is better to set it free like a dove disappearing into a cloudy skyand never look back.

Perhaps, in Heaven, I will meet the person I once believed I knew: not the worldly version shaped and scarred by this life, but the person who lived within my mind and accompanied me for a time.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/Hq9OnCpepD

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/nj5ugqwG9c


r/OCPoetry 2h ago

Feedback Please idk

1 Upvotes

consciousness is a ship

im sailing through the waters of celine's night

port is head

in the slow dive

under massive attack, with my spying eye

i enter pool of thoughts

at the same time

watching

like

f"{interpol}ation"

yield: dont be scared don't be shy

#come on in waters fine

stripped to the steeple

i rip me off myself

to belittle dose of me

it doesn't have to be lethal

everything is a gray area

til it's something that hurt ya

crawling on a gray band of lithosphere

overcooked under death rays of sun

try to out

run -

gra(y)ve

all eyes on me

all lies on me

and no one lies on me

so i lie down myself

in a system of a down

as i lay dying

lie myself

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/DfJbca9kzl

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/fwAgbsxSD5


r/OCPoetry 10h ago

Feedback Please Return to reality

3 Upvotes

Sometimes I sit in the corners of my mind,
It’s not really a choice…
But neither am I looking to be found.

For the dust has settled,
And the light is low,
This peace that follows,
Is all I want to know.

A wallless room,
No noise, no time,
A place that doesn’t exist,
A place that’s all mine.

It almost feels safe…
Comforting and real,
But this world has no patience,
For things that aren’t fuelled.

So I wiggle my toes,
And name the things I can see,
I return to reality,
And I hope the stillness waits for me.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1um5rtw/an_old_man_pleasures_himself/ 

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v31jli/my_mother_is_an_oak_tree/


r/OCPoetry 2h ago

Feedback Please Where the leaf fell

1 Upvotes

I was wandering

in search of my own existence.

Exhausted, I rested

beneath the quiet shade of a tree.

Then suddenly

the restless scratching of a pen

pulled my attention away.

Just a thought..

What kind of life must it be,

the one touched by that pen

etching, upon the canvas of emptiness,

a shadow into being?

And then

it was thrown away,

onto a heap of grass…

an unfinished story,

yet destined to remain eternal.

An existence that exists

but carries no purpose.

In that moment,

a thought surrounded me

My eyes began to follow

the journey of a leaf

falling from that very tree.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/6KsHGAgtw7

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/NyytGlpt5u


r/OCPoetry 10h ago

Feedback Please Beauty

3 Upvotes

The fragrant flowers push through the sidewalk

Sun reflecting on still water of a lake

The rainbow shimmer of oil mixed with water

A single glistening tear, on a lonely cheek

.

The purr of a kitten lying in your lap

Trees blowing in the cool breeze

The cool spray of the ocean on your face

The deep copper red of dried blood

.

A master tinkling on the piano

The smell of bread baked with love

The dry taste of your favorite wine

Remembering a life of beauty.

.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/QqT6uyI5RA

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/763GDARDlF


r/OCPoetry 3h ago

Feedback Please unknowable

1 Upvotes

I lose myself in relationships written backwards, the final period placed before the story has even begun.
I try to recreate what I knew twelve months ago, an opening hindered by a different language, a trust built on nothing, and therefore built on everything.
Eyes of extraordinary gentleness, a gentleness I pushed away with fierce resistance, so accustomed was I to the roughness of a life gone off course. You were the most loving; perhaps you will become the most loved. Because your bruised heart loved a heart that had gone numb.
The way we expressed ourselves was not always beautiful, yet an absolute sincerity seeped through the tears I let fall on that warm summer day in that apartment. I let you glimpse what lay beneath the shell, the weak, sensitive man, and you embraced him tenderly, never once judging him.
You were home.
You were a stranger who felt achingly familiar.
A soothing tenderness offered by a heart burning with bitterness. I will not remember your words; I will remember those eyes, irrationally mine.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/Z8HeNekmsu

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/ftaENSWzpU


r/OCPoetry 11h ago

Feedback Please The clouds

4 Upvotes

To be like you.
To look like you.
To be amongst you
To have that freedom
To have that love that can only be seen from afar
To be so white that my feelings are visible
To become your shade, if only for a moment.
To hold the sun away from you.
To give you one quiet moment beneath me.
To always have to wonder, where did we go?
Perhaps we are somewhere amongst those clouds.
So high up we could’ve never made it
at least not together.
when it rains our worlds unite
I always hated the rain
But the rain is the only way my soul can reach you.
And that’s why I always hated it.
But perhaps we are somewhere
Amongst those clouds.

feedback
Feedback


r/OCPoetry 4h ago

Feedback Please Will I Wave

1 Upvotes

Will I Wave

Crossing the street I used to live on

My head down

Hey! If I look up, I will see myself

Driving my old sixty-eight Merc’

I will hear the rumble

I will smell the gas

Will I wave?

Strangely –

I

do

not

see

it

Disappointed,

I reach the other side.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3olkj/comment/oz4slhc/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1v3le9w/comment/oz4rhav/?context=3&utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button


r/OCPoetry 8h ago

Feedback Please You you you

2 Upvotes

Your insides are so red

Your dangling form so blue

I'll keep your heart so close

It'll be just me and you

I've heard it tastes metallic

But i find you so sweet

How will He have your heart?

Now that i stole your beat

You make my mouth so salty

Can I sip you to cleanse

My heart jumps as it coats my tongue

Weaving strings, cold and dense

My first ever poem so i know i would've managed to fuck up in a plethora of ways 💔💔🥀, any feedback and reviews will be duely appreciated

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/NquN8M1gGc

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/9CZ200Rumz


r/OCPoetry 5h ago

Just Sharing Lost

1 Upvotes

Scream until my lungs get sore
Scream until I’m not there anymore.
Where can I store this pent-up hate?
When will this seething rage dissipate?
Burning my throat with a kissing caress,
Fiery liquid, make me feel less.
Sweet numbness soothes the ache,
My chaotic thoughts now a frozen lake.
But when that glacier starts to thaw,
Pain returns and I can’t take it anymore.
A perpetual painful cycle of suppression,
Tell me, am I doomed to this depression?
I miss the sun kissing my face,
But its rays can’t penetrate this vengeful place.
So deep, so dark, so hollow and alone,
Do I need repentance, to beg and atone?
Or am I frail and weak, pathetic?
I’m so lost, blinded, searching for an exit.
So bottle after bottle I consume,
Maybe I like it here, I’ll close my eyes to the doom.
And I’ll smile and feel the sharp kiss of frost,
I don’t want to be found, I will forever be
Lost.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/JQjd1lNJ3b

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/aIpNrqrL5n


r/OCPoetry 8h ago

Feedback Please Call the Cops

2 Upvotes

We share a Spartan imagination

The birds and I

We wake up and dream

Is that not what fairytales are?

Who knew insects feast on Snickers bar remains

Or that pigeons gobble on those insects lips

Oh Romeo oh Romeo wherefore art thou?

Pity rhyming couplets have been binned

More sinned against than sinning

You’ll have to call the cops

To clean away the pigeons underfoot

They have a squad for that

Amicus briefly / not exactly friends

Avian crowds have been seen over Mount Rushmore

The presidents blink / they know it’s not rain

And blink again

They haven’t moved in unison for years

The rock is too fragile

Completion is an unfinished story

That’s what fairytales are

Colin Greer is the author of a new book of poetry, If But My Gaze Could Heal.

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