that was in 2024. i have cptsd and struggle with my mental health a lot. i usually leave my house once or twice every 2-3 months if i can help it. the longest i stayed inside was 3 years, and i showered less than 10 times during that.

i really, really struggle, and since i live alone i get away with being disgusting. but i took a shower last night, and when i do manage to wash myself i do it thoroughly, it only took me 20 minutes (i make it a much bigger deal in my head) i scrubbed every inch of myself with a hand towel and soap multiple times. i love feeling clean! it's so relieving, but i dread knowing how i'll start feeling gross 4-5 days from now.

but how do i do it regularly? my birthday was on the 3rd, and when i got home i stayed and slept in the same clothes until last night when i showered. i don't even change or use wipes in intimate areas. i just have no motivation, and i only shower the night before i know i need to be somewhere, then the cycle repeats. are there any tricks to make it a fun experience? not something to dread? the process is so daunting. sorry i'm kind of going on. i just want some advice that could make my experience easier. thanks guys

My husband was neglected as a kid. I mean like his parents didn't even brush his teeth or teach him how to properly bathe and he was bullied most of his childhood and early teens. We've been together since high school and me and my parents taught him a lot. We've been living together for year and a half now. He follows the basics of hygiene but I don't think that's enough. I'm trying to explain to him that little habits matter more than deep cleaning and he calls me a clean freak.
For example: when he finishes showering, he never wipes down the shower doors from soap residue, which leads to either me going in after him or the reside builds up until it's deep clean day (which we have every Saturday). And little things like this too: he never cleans his PC table after eating there, leaves used cups and plates all over the house. Don't even get me started on sitting on our clean sheets with his work clothes on...... His logic is that 'it all gets cleaned on Saturday anyway'.

I love him and this is not me slandering him. He had a hard childhood and I get that, he has improved a lot since we first met but still says that I'm too much of a clean freak. Am I though? I always thought daily cleaning habits that take less than 10 seconds are normal. He doesn't think so.

My question is: how do I help him grow into these habits?

My partners feet always smell, so do his shoes

He is incredibly clean and hygienic, he has a huge range of cologne/deodorant, he showers and changes his socks every day, we are at a loss

He’s ashamed of it and I want to find a way to help him

Edit: everyone is mentioned fungus on the feet so I will add it here, he cleans his feet thoroughly every day, there is no fungus, no athletes foot, no verrucas, etc

Every skincare expert swears that applying body lotion while your skin is still slightly damp locks in ten times more hydration. I’ve been trying to force myself to do this, but the physical sensation is so frustrating. The lotion just slips around on top of the water droplets, turning into a white, streaky mess that takes forever to rub in. By the time I finally massage it into my skin, my clothes are sticking to me, and I just feel damp rather than moisturized. Is there an actual technique to this, or is "damp skin moisturization" way more annoying than people let on?

I used to buy everything in heavy, sweet fragrances—vanilla body wash, coconut deodorant, fruity body lotions. But recently I switched to entirely unscented, sensitive-skin products, and my body routine feels so much cleaner. Now, instead of stepping out of the shower in a cloud of artificial perfume that clashes with my actual perfume, I just smell like... nothing. It made me realize how much we associate "cleanliness" with heavy artificial scents rather than actual neutral freshness. Has anyone else made the full switch to unscented hygiene products?

I had a debate with a friend about shower routines, and they casually admitted they never actually reach down to scrub their feet with soap—they just assume the soapy water running down their legs during the shower does the job. To me, that sounds crazy because your feet spend all day trapped in socks and shoes sweating, but they swear the soap-and-water runoff is more than enough to keep them clean. Are people actually lathering up their feet every single day, or is gravity doing most of the work for most people?

Skincare trends keep preaching that everyone needs to oil-cleanse first to break down sunscreen and oil, followed by a water-based cleanser to actually wash the skin. I don't wear heavy makeup, just daily SPF and moisturizer, but whenever I try double cleansing, my skin feels completely stripped, dry, and irritated. It makes me wonder if this two-step hygiene routine is actually necessary for everyday skin, or if a single gentle cleanser is plenty for people who aren't wearing full glam every day?

Hello everyone,

I’ve (25 F) been getting very annoyed with the scent of my underwear specifically. Anything from underwear to cute lil shorts carry a normal vaginal scent. But it never leaves when I wash my clothes.

Same with tops like bras or T-shirts, but with my deodorant stains and slightly musky scent.

I’ve used gentle detergents, arm and hammer detergents, tried adding a little bleach sometimes, tried adding the powdery arm and hammer stuff. Even tried white vinegar but every time it comes out smelling like I didn’t even wash it🫤

Anyone have advice for me?😂 I don’t let my clothes sit too long, especially underwear.

Edit: I forgot to say I have used baking soda as well!

Hi this might be a bit embarassing but I have a lot of trouble brushing my teeth on a regular basis. Luckily I don't have a lot of dental problems but I would like to improve my habits. Do yall think brushing my teeth in the shower would help since I'm already cleaning other stuff?

I realized I've somehow made it into adulthood without ever knowing the "right" answer to this. Do most people use a separate towel just for their face, or do you dry your face with the same towel you used after your shower?

I've done both over the years and never really thought much about it until recently. Now I'm curious if I'm the odd one out.

is it normal that people go 7+ days without showering? asking about someone in my life who can go that long and it bothers me. i shower everyday or every other day depending on what i have going on, which is normal?

I’m sure there are gonna be people in the comments that will be rude, I’ve been reading through this sub for a couple of weeks now, so I’m prepared for those comments, but I really do hope that some people here will be able to offer some sort of thoughtful input or advice.

My son is 25, I’ve got four sons and one daughter total. My three oldest sons rent a really nice house together about 10 minutes away from me. The house gets a little dusty and might need mopping or counters wiped down every once in a while but overall they have nice furniture and keep the house in good working order. It looks very clean and usually looks nothing like a typical bachelor pad. All three of them do a great job with it.

Regarding hygiene, four out of my five kids have excellent hygiene. They shower every day, they wear clean clothing, they keep up with their laundry, etc.

My daughter had a little stretch when she was like 15 or 16 when her hygiene slipped, but she was going through massive depression, and when we addressed the depression, the hygiene issues were fixed inadvertently along with it, and she’s incredibly clean and hygienic now at the age of 21.

So I understand that mental health can impact this stuff, I totally get it. I also get that neurodivergence can impact it massively. I’m neurodivergent myself.

But I am encountering a level of hygiene issues that I just can’t seem to make an impact on with my oldest son. Mind you hygiene was one of the main reasons that I left my ex. My oldest son‘s (and all of my kids for that matter) dad. He wasn’t like that when I met him, but as time went on his hygiene got worse and worse, and combined with a lot of other behaviors that also deteriorated, I wound up leaving him after years of feeling like I had to parent my own husband.

Unfortunately, my oldest son seems to have picked up on these bad habits. It’s so frustrating. This is such a sweet, talented and genuinely good looking kid. As his mom, it breaks my heart because I know how offputting bad hygiene is to people. He’s already very introverted and I know going out into the world smelling like BO is only going to keep him isolated. I’ve had conversations ranging from incredibly subtle, to very positive and motivating, to empathic, explaining my own struggles with executive function, and things only seem to work for a couple of days.

Maybe a week or two maximum. We’ve tried him on different medication’s, but he’s never really found one that was a good fit for his ADHD. Stimulants suppressed his appetite so much that he was straight up forgetting to eat, even if we were setting alarms.

I tried habit stacking with him. We bought a cute little refrigerator to put in his room and put his favorite brand of coffee drink in it. And I said OK let’s habit stack, let’s turn this into something positive. Took him to the store and had him pick out a whole bunch of grooming products that he really liked. And then I added in a really nice combination hair and body product which I know isn’t necessarily perfect, but I figured on days where he doesn’t have any motivation, he’s not overstimulated by too many things to pick from and has a backup option that is super simple. And I was like, all right let’s make this self-care that you deserve, not something that you have to do. I explained to him why it was so important to me. I said I love you and you deserve to have friends and to be treated well by people, but if I’m being honest with you, hygiene issues are going to impact the way that you received out in the world and he understood and agreed. I told him, “You can wake up, you can use the restroom, take your shower, and then come relax in your room with one of your favorite coffee drinks and just chill a little bit before work.” Again these conversations only work for a couple of days or maximum a couple of weeks and then the habits come back and the intense BO comes back.

He works in demolition and junk removal for my current husband‘s business. My three oldest sons work for the business. Mind you my current husband is the cleanest blue-collar worker on earth I swear. Very well groomed, goes to the barber every two weeks, showers once or twice a day. Works out, washes his laundry like two or three times after each job to get it super clean. So do his brothers. They love the job, they all get along great, but my son will literally come home from work after working in the Arizona sun, sweating, in his work clothes, and just exist in the house that way until bedtime. He’s even laid down in bed in his work clothes to sleep in them.

It bothers his brothers, because they live with him and have to ride in the work truck with him. They were patient for a while, but they’ve been very point-blank with him. Like you are impacting our workday, you need to shower. Even if it gets through to him, even if he starts showering regularly like I said it drops off after a week or so. Or he will shower and then literally forget to put on deodorant before work so the shower is a moot point by the end of the day.

He’ll get a little bit quiet or defensive, but for the most part, he’s actually surprisingly receptive to the conversations and then when I check in with him after the good habits drop off a couple of weeks later, he just is so down and defeated, and maybe a little defensive. And it’s just like we have to start the cycle of trying to motivate him all over again. If he lived on his own and didn’t work for the business, I’d be like you know what you’re a grown-up, deal with the consequences of your actions. But it’s impacting my two other kids who live with him and work with him, it’s causing him to remain incredibly socially isolated, and I know he’s actually deeply depressed about it.

He is on an antidepressant that he believes helps a little, but he said for some reason he just struggles so bad with the hygiene. Also, I just wanna clarify, he does have ADHD and it really impacts his executive function, but he is very low support needs. This kid is very functional in the rest of his life. He has a pet snake that has this gorgeous, huge enclosure, he’s researched every aspect of it, spent hundreds of dollars getting the humidity in the environment perfect. It’s one of the healthiest looking snakes I’ve ever seen. He’s a talented artist. He’s just very witty and like I said even on the surface he’s a great looking kid. We just cannot get this hygiene issue sorted out. And when I tell you, BO, just to clarify, this isn’t a hint, this is like it stings your eyes when you have to be in close proximity to him. There’s no sort of medical issue going on, it’s literally just a refusal or inability to keep up with normal hygienic standards or even basic hygienic standards.

My wife admitted a while ago that she occasionally wears my boxer briefs around the house because she says theyre more comfortable than a lot of her sleep shorts. At first I thought it was funny... until I realized half the time I couldn't find a clean pair because they were somehow ending up in her drawer. Lol

Now when I buy new underwear, i almost feel like i have to buy extra because i know a few pairs are eventually going to become "hers."

anyone else's spouse quietly claim part of their wardrobe like this?

i’m not sure if this is the right sub for this, but my cleaner comes to my house once a week and she’s a smoker.

i’ve never actually seen her smoking, but whenever she cleans the living room, she closes the hallway door and then i can smell cigarette smoke. she opens the windows, which are huge, so the air circulates and the smell doesn’t really linger.

i don’t mind it that much, but it does bother me a little, especially because she does it secretly.

i don’t smoke cigarettes, but i do smoke weed, and as the owner of the house, i choose to use a carbon filter that doesn’t leave any smell. so i feel weird about her deciding on her own to smoke inside, you know?

i feel like she should ask me whether it’s okay or not. other people who have worked in my house always went outside to smoke on the patio.

How often do you clean or disinfect your phone? And what do you usually use to clean it?

So I've always hung my towel up after a shower and used it maybe 2 or 3 times before washing it. My roommate from last year thought that was gross and said she washes hers after every single use, which seemed like overkill to me. But now I'm second guessing myself.

I shower every day and I feel like if I'm clean when I get out, the towel shouldn't be that dirty right? But then I started thinking about how it just sits there damp in the bathroom and now I'm wondering if that's actually kinda nasty. I don't want to do laundry constantly but I also don't want to be drying off with something that's growing bacteria or whatever.

How often do you guys wash your towels? Is there like a standard that makes sense or does it just depend on your setup? My bathroom doesn't have great ventilation so maybe that changes things. I dunno, I just want to make sure I'm not being disgusting without realizing it.

I keep a bottle of hand sanitizer attached to my bag for when I’m out running errands, but using it always leaves me feeling conflicted. Sure, it kills the bacteria, but it doesn't actually remove anything. The dirt, subtle grime, or stickiness is still technically on your hands, just now mixed with evaporated alcohol. Am I the only one who feels like hand sanitizer is just an emergency temporary fix that makes you crave a sink with real soap and running water even more?

Hi everyone. I’m genuinely curious on how many people use a different razor for pubic hair vs the rest of ur body.

I’m F and i personally have a 5 blade razor that I will use for my pubic hair then a 3 blade for my armpits and legs. I change the heads of my razors probably after a week or two depending on how much I am shaving.

I feel like a lot of people use the same razor all over.

So i’m just wondering:

How often do you change your razor?

Do you use the same razor all over?

Are you a body wash, bar soap or no soap type of person?

Just want to see what y'all think of my routine:

So first, I try to shower every other day, though sometimes I get lazy and skip a day (I admit I need to work on being more consistent)

When I do shower, I shampoo, then wash my body in this order: Face, torso, arms, legs, private area, feet, and then my ass. Sometimes I'll wash my body twice. And then lastly, I shampoo my hair one more time. I don't really use conditioner that often cause I don't really need it.

I also try to shave my whole body every 2-3 weeks, though sometimes it ends up being more like 1-2 weeks.

Tired? Shower. Bored? Shower. Overwhelmed? Shower. Just got home? Shower. Going out? Shower. Relieved? Shower. Stressed? Shower. Waking up? Shower. Going to bed? Shower. Back from work/school? Shower. Sad? Shower. Sick? Shower. Then rest.

I love a shower. Its my favourite thing to do for self care. I hope i get to design my perfect shower one day. One with curved dark stone walls, dim lights, eucalyptus branches, and no one to share it with.

Hi, I have a question about my oral hygiene.

I brushed my teeth yesterday morning, but then I didn't brush them again until this morning. Today, even after brushing, I still have bad breath. Is that normal, or could it be a sign of an oral hygiene problem or something else? (I dont often brush m'y teeth and forget frequently bcs im in home late)

So I shower every day and I always use a fresh towel afterward. My roommate thinks its wasteful and says most people use the same towel for like a week or more. I just cant wrap my head around it because even though you're clean when you dry off, the towel still gets damp and sits there until the next day.

I know logically you're supposed to be clean after a shower but something about using a towel that's been hanging there for days feels off to me. Maybe I'm overthinking it but I also worry about it getting that musty smell or bacteria building up in the fabric.

Does anyone have a good system for this? Like how many times do you actually use a towel before washing it? And do you hang it in a specific way so it dries faster? I feel like I'm the only person who goes through towels this fast and now I'm second-guessing myself.

I try to stay as clean as I’m able, but admittedly, I’m lazy at times. I’d like to first point out that I’m prone to sweating.

I try to shower every day, if not, every other day at least.
It only takes a few hours after a shower for me to start smelling.
I take thorough showers. I shampoo twice, massaging my scalp. Add conditioner to my ends. I use a microfiber hair towel that I keep it in for like 10 minutes maybe? I don’t always use a blow dryer, but it’s not different anyhow. My hair is still greasy after like 4 hours.
I also have the sud scrubber, so I’m not (at least I think, as I wash it off and clean it every week) holding onto any bacteria from like.. a loofah. I often go over with my body wash twice because I have a strong scent. I also get in between the more private places, and my feet.
I lotion immediately after a shower, as well as deodorant.
If it helps:
I use Native. Shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. (Vanilla) as well as Tree Hut’s sugar scrub (also Vanilla).
Also AMAB, if that matters.

But yeah. After a few hours, my hair looks wet and greasy, I start to smell weird, and it’s like nothing I use is really strong enough for me to not have any type of odor. I don’t even have to be doing anything exhausting.
I get that it probably means that what I currently use isn’t working for me, but idk. I used to use generic products and that worked for my hair at one point, but doesn’t anymore.
(I didn’t start growing out my hair until the pandemic, so it worked for my short hair but not long) like dove, head & shoulders, etc.. I haven’t really used anything that could be considered better than Native considering financial struggle.

As for my lifestyle, I’ve always been abnormally hot. Even more so now since I started taking medicated with a side effect of rising temperature. I’m a little overweight, but it’s something I’ve been working on.. kind of. But I also wouldn’t think my weight alone would contribute that much to a strong scent.