When your OCD is so severe and the theme is so egodystonic and you spend years where your consciousness is marinated in and only in obsession and compulsion and avoidance against your will and then learning to completely disregard a thought - my brain can't hold a thread of thoughts the way it used to. I had to manually to teach it to disengage in a way that now it defaults to out of over-coping. This is a part of it. The body-wide response at all times to nonstop ocd and the torture I'm convinced have physically scarred parts of my brain and damaged it to the point I feel like it must be early onset dementia if I wasn't so young.

This is my biggest mental compulsion right now. It’s causing me to stay inside the house. I finally went out for drinks with a date Saturday and ever since then I’ve been bed ridden with the fear I was recorded and now I’m on the internet somewhere. Its been over a year of this persistent thought. It’s fueled by the things I have done while drinking. Alcohol is the only thing that gives me relief from my thoughts but then it is far far worse after. I also take Xanax to help with the anxiety and the combination obviously leads to memory loss which causes me to torture myself with scenarios. I’m rambling at this point but I feel like going through this cycle over and over has made me feel so defeated. Im in therapy and have been off and on meds throughout the years. I have an appointment today for an IOP type of treatment plan I hope this will be all over soon

this is a question about ocd because i show ocd symptoms, that’s why i’m here but it’ll be personal

TW for animal cruelty and violence in general

i’m not gonna go into detail but as a kid i have had problems with hurting people, animals and myself. i would never now and i believe i developed enough empathy. however sometimes i still get the urge to hurt things. it feels like what i was doing as a kid didn't heal properly and that i still have the potential to do those things again. i know i would never but i’m scared of losing control. when i'm trying to look at those specific animals without being bothered, it feels like i'm trying to pretend to think like how other people do about those things. it makes me feel like an outsider

so with my history of doing those things, whenever i have violent thoughts now i can’t tell if they’re intrusive thoughts or a sign of something else. does anyone know how to tell those things apart?

these are all already hard to admit so please don’t judge me for it. i’m in the process of getting help for all this but i just needed to ask this

i (19f) feel like i've been battling this spiral for months now with very few glimpses of hope. at this point i've stopped expecting it all together. my ocd has made me withdraw socially since middle school and i haven't been able to recover since. i spent my teen years majorly depressed and missed out on so many "normal" life experiences to the point where i feel like im starting from the ground up when my life has barely started. i've been in and out of therapy for years and i feel like my medication is only a temporary solution.

i've put in the work, i've tried to be mindful, but each day is turning into a blur and its making me miserable.

my question is, how do you cope with it? i want to love myself and lead a fufilling life but my brain is my worst enemy. how can some of you find love and meaningful friendships without letting this tear you apart from the inside anymore?

Other than the tricyclic Clomipramine, everyone seems to be on SSRI's (fluoxetine, sertraline, paroxetine, escitalopram...).

Question is, if a doctor couldn't prescribe SSRI's for whatever reason (side effects, bipolar patient, etc...), is there any medicine that can treat OCD very effectively?

Whether it be an antipsychotic (Abilify, Rexulti, Vraylat, Olanzapine, Haloperidol...), a mood stabilizer (Lammotrigine, lithium, Valproate) or an SNRI like Venlafaxine or Duloxetine...isn't really there that can be as effective as SSRI's for OCD?

I’m afraid of my HR rising outside in the summer, heat stroke, heat exhaustion. For my children I’m fearful of it being way too hot on them outside. Went outside for hours this week and it was nerve racking as hell but I did it. Really hot day but I did it!

Hi! I just started Fluvoxamine (Luvox) a week ago at 25mg and I’m really hopeful it helps. I’m unsure if it’s placebo effect but I have been sleeping better already and a bit more patient with my 6 year old and not thinking myself in circles as much.

I’m just wondering if anyone experienced acne on this medication and/or any skin changes. I also have hormonal conditions (Pcos and endometriosis) so I’m trying to pinpoint what symptom goes with what lol and just the past week my skin has broken out quite a bit and is dry (but I’m also in an endo flair and hoping that’s not also caused from the medication)

I will say I have been extremely sick to my stomach since starting it and hoping I’ll adjust more within the next week or so? I was told 25mg once a day for 4 weeks then 25mg twice a day

i could really use some tips/advice on how to stop googling things. i have reminders that go off daily that just says hey don’t look anything up you’re fine but it doesn’t really work anymore. it also sucks a lot too because i genuinely enjoy learning about diseases and stuff like that but i know i shouldn’t look things up :( anything would be appreciated!

First ever reddit post, bare with me here.

I’ve had intrusive thoughts and have been browsing reddit for years about hobbies, somehow I’ve never thought to look up mental illnesses to find other people who experience stuff similar to what I do, my themes have revolved mostly over harming closes ones, and I’m sitting here crying because I’m not alone.

I feel like an imposter since I just have a generalized anxiety disorder diagnosis but I’m currently waiting for further therapy for intrusive thoughts. Still wanted to thank all the kind and brave souls who post their story here.

I feel like learning about ocd has made me put together so many dots about why I acted certain ways. I don’t think my ocd was as bad when I was younger but I think I’ve had it at least to some degree for a very long time.

I’m current hyper fixated on themes related to religion, end times, and aliens. I’m in a constant state of thinking about my “beliefs”. Monitoring things for signs of end times. You name it. It’s truly miserable and I’m finding it difficult to find help.

I have noticed myself falling back into this spiral of dissociation. I’m not sure if I’m having major life changes moving, going back to school and what not.

I moved back into my old house where my ocd originally began and now i just feel weird. If that makes sense. I constantly wake up and feel confused and out of it like I’m just here.

Does anyone ever experience this with new change

i’ll have the stupidest obsessions, and they make me feel so awful. i wish my brain worked like a normal person, like somebody who wasn’t plagued with constant intrusive thoughts.

am i just supposed to live with this for my whole life? how do i deal with a brain like this? i feel like there is nobody that understands. my family gets angry at me when i have to do compulsions, i can’t tell a single soul about my intrusive thoughts because i can’t even say them out loud. i don’t even want to think them into existence. i never even use reddit anymore but yeah little vent because ive had the most stressful obsession the past few days