When I first moved to Philly two years ago I came from a very suburban area where you always helped your neighbor, always held doors, said hello etc. Which meant after I moved here I was the bleeding heart forking out every spare dollar and quarter to homeless people on the 10-minute walk to the station on my morning commute. My first acquaintance here was a homeless guy living behind my building who I still check on these days. In my early transplant days I ran to hold doors or would guiltily and diligently stop and listen to the vest wearing Planned Parenthood or Greenpeace petiton workers because I felt bad for outright ignoring them.
I am a millennial woman raised in the societal upbringing of "be polite, be kind, be accommodating." Its exhausting. I grew tired and I grew harder in this city.
However, today, today people just need to leave me alone and mind their fucking business.
Walking into Trader Joe's this evening and these vested dude said something about "Ma'am do you care about gun violence?" I do but I'm depressed, using my last couple bucks for food before payday next week and not in the mood for a 15 minute canned spiel and hassle to try to get $25 dollars from me. So I kept quiet, head down and went inside. Upon exit the same guy says, "You don't want to talk to me, you should at least smile." And as I kept walking his vested buddy, "Yeah, thats okay, sure just ignore him."
Fuck both of you.
This was also hot off a nosey-ass, confrontation in a public restroom earlier where a woman stopped me on exit and said, "You work at a hospital?" (Nope, my job has absolutely nothing to do with Healthcare just weirdly requires us to wear scrubs for uniform), "Because that was the least thorough hand washing I've ever seen."
Fuck her too. I use soap, sing happy birthday and dry thoroughly and I sure as shit wasn't elbows deep rummaging in my asshole in the bathroom stall.
And yesterday, some "young bull" on his bike sped towards me in the bike lane, popped a wheely and faked like he was crashing his front tire into my head before pulling away at the last second.
Idk what kind of cuntjuice has been put the water in this fuckass city lately but I'm somewhat happy to move out to the suburbs next month for a little while. People have lost their humanity (myself included), their empathy and their ability to mind their own fucking business.