My baby started crawling on her hands and knees yesterday, and she will be 12 months old in a week. I was FaceTiming our friend and my daughter decided she wanted something on the other side of the room so she got on her hands and knees and crawled over. It was awesome, and it reminded me how impatient I was before this.

3 months ago I was panicking, putting toys in front of her, researching how to get a baby to crawl, googling the age when most babies do it, holding her abdomen up while she yells at me because she just doesn’t wanna do it. I felt so sad. Typical FTM.

I kept seeing people whose babies crawled when they were 6, 7, 8 months old and I just thought she was never gonna do it. The pediatrician said it was fine, but I had seen videos and articles about the benefits of hands and knees crawling despite it not being a milestone, and I just really wanted her to.
Then she started army crawling at 10 months and I kind of accepted that as what she would do until she learned how to walk and I was okay with it. I started to forget about it and (get this) let her develop at her own pace! And then she just randomly did it!

I wanted to share this to remind all the first time moms (or second or third or whatever) that indeed, babies do develop at their own pace and there’s no real tricks you can do to make it happen faster and honestly, you don’t have to! I’m happy that I wasn’t rushing her these last couple of months because I was gonna make myself and her miserable.

My MIL is careless when it comes to most aspects of baby/child safety, many examples come to mind, like when she tried to feed my then six month old spicy noodles, freely handing her choking hazards, attempting to put her on her stomach for sleep with a bunch of blankets. All those things are bad enough, but my main concern that I just cannot understand with her is car seat safety.

TW: infant death

MIL’s first child died in a car accident at two months old, he had been sitting on MIL’s lap in the passenger seat. Granted, it was the mid 80s, where I’m sure that wasn’t all too uncommon. I can only imagine how utterly heart breaking and traumatising it must have been for her, which is why I cannot understand how she continues to be completely reckless when it comes to the importance of car seats for children. She has proudly boasted several times that she never had her kids in car seats when they were young and that she’d even breastfeed my husband as a baby while driving. He was born in 2000 so there’s not really the excuse of ignorance at that point, car seats were very well established and required by law then.

I have told her many times that I do not agree with this and when it comes to my child (19 months old) she needs to be in a rear facing car seat, fully buckled, every time she is in a moving car. MIL will try fight me on the fact that it needs to be rear-facing, saying that it “doesn’t make a difference”, and the few times we have been in the car with her she actively encourages me to take my daughter out of her seat every time she’s crying or wants out and calls me mean for refusing to do it.

Needless to say, she is not allowed unsupervised time with our daughter, and especially not allowed to drive her anywhere. She pouts about it, but how could I ever trust her? I just couldn’t, simple as that. She has openly told me that she will defy my wishes and rules if I’m not around, so I know 100% that she wouldn’t listen to a thing I’d ask of her.

It’s really sad that she refuses to change her ways, even after what happened with her baby, but I could never forgive myself if something happened to my child under her care.

That's basically it. Social media is SO insane these days and I have half a dozen people I know actively trying to become "momfluencers". No shade to their choices, I'm just tired of comparing myself to others. So this is just a reminder that if you're feeling down on yourself about ANYTHING re your own child, give yourself permission to mute the accounts that trigger that nasty inner voice. You're a good mom. You're doing a good job. Your baby is not broken just because you don't tote them around to every event/pool party/fun summer thing. Comparison is the thief of joy mamas. That's all :)

So I had my baby in June and I already knew from my first she was going to be super dramatic but to be this dramatic is just hilarious. I have a goat and a gas machine lol. If she’s mad she farts, if you don’t pick her up fast enough she farts, we’ve learned her judgment face is soon to be accompanied by a fart, when we bathe her she farts, she just farts. It’s not your typical gassy fart either, she actually seems content otherwise, she just shows her disapproval by farting lol. It honestly singlehanded makes all the not so great moments worth it.

My baby had very dark, nearly black eyes when he was born. Now at 10 weeks, they're a medium blue. I doubt his eyes will stay blue, as both me and his dad have dark brown eyes. Did anyone have their baby's eyes do this and they ended up brown?

Little girl is 6mo and just.. dang. She dwarfs the other babies around her, even ones several months older. Mom is average. Dad is average. Grandmas are petite (5’0”) and grandpas are tall (6’3”).

Baby was born 80th for length, 75th for weight, and 99th for head circumference. She settled into 96th for length, 50th for weight, and 96th for head circumference from around 2mo. It was looking like she would slow down around 4mo when her length dropped to 70th for a couple months.. then she bounced right back to 96th at 6mo. The only mercy is that she mostly fits into clothes for her age, she just graduates a couple weeks early on onesies.

Did your big babies slow down? What age? Her doctor gasped at her length during our last appt and showed concern until I pointed out she had returned to her old percentile (though she plans to watch her anyway). I’m wondering if I’ve just birthed an Amazonian goddess at this point.

Edit: Haha, seems like I just have a tall girl on my hands! My little titaness is awake from her nap, but I’ll read any new comments later. Thank you so much everyone! Much love to our big babies!

Was there anything that you eventually learned you should have been doing for your babies, or almost didn't do, because you didn't know you were supposed to do it? For example, I almost missed the fact that I needed to clean my son's mouth every day from birth. I used to assume I didn't need to worry about that until he had teeth.

I've also made minor mistakes with his milk, such as serving a bottle for too long and I only just thought to buy a reflective cover for his car seat after complaining for ages that I felt guilty about putting him into a hot car seat. (I also bought a sunshade for the window.)

Now here I am holding my sleeping baby and wondering what I could be doing better that I don't even know about. So what things did you miss/almost missed for a while? I'm not looking for a pep talk, as none of us are perfect. Just a chance to learn from other's lessons learned. 😊

EDIT: Just a reminder — this post is meant to collect the small lessons parents found helpful. Saying something ‘isn’t a mistake’ might seem harmless, but it can make people feel silly for contributing. I'd like to hear what people wish they knew going into parenting, regardless of whether other people agree if it was a mistake or not.

My husband is the youngest of three siblings—a surprise baby born when his mother was 45 and his father was 50. We’ve been married for nearly four years and recently had our first child. This is the first grandchild for both of our families.

We live five minutes from my parents, whom we are very close with; my mother watches the baby while I work. We attend church with my parents weekly as well as have supper with them throughout the week. My in-laws, on the other hand, live across the country. Before the baby was born, we typically saw them about once every six months. Since the birth, they have visited monthly, staying with other local family members.

My mother-in-law (MIL) has always been kind to me, though not necessarily warm. She never made much effort to build a relationship with me outside of being her son’s wife. In fact, throughout our four years of marriage, I was never invited to her home state or introduced to her extended family—until I was heavily pregnant with their first grandchild. During my third trimester, we flew out for a baby shower MIL organized with her side of the family. My doctor cleared me to fly, but it was -25°F and miserable. While everyone was polite, I couldn't shake the feeling that I hadn't truly been accepted into the family until I became pregnant.

Our baby was born healthy, but due to minor complications, he spent his first few days in the NICU. He was discharged on a Sunday, and MIL flew in from across the country to visit by Tuesday. Although it felt overbearing of me, I simply asked that she shower and change clothes after traveling before visiting us; she obliged. Two days later, my father-in-law (FIL) and sister-in-law (SIL) arrived as well, and I made the same request, which they also honored.

That visit quickly became tense. My husband put immense pressure on me to let his parents act as "grandparents." As a new, hormonal postpartum mom healing from a delivery tear and struggling to navigate breastfeeding with a house full of near-strangers, I felt overwhelmed and uncomfortable. Rather than supporting me, my husband was playing Mario Kart with his sister, leaving me to act as a host—brewing coffee and catering to my father-in-law. I still hold a lot of resentment toward my husband for how that visit played out. After the fact, I was informed by my husband that I’d come off as “unwelcoming” to his family and he asked me to try harder next time.

By MIL’s third visit, things seemed to improve. It was just her this time, and we spent a full day together with the baby. She opened up to me, sharing that her own parents were uninvolved with her children and that her in-laws had passed away before her kids were born. I realized she had never experienced having grandparents around, let alone being a grandparent or a mother-in-law herself. It was a genuine heart-to-heart, and when she left that evening, I felt like we were finally on the same page.

The following morning, I was supposed to work. After being up all night with the baby, I was completely exhausted and told my husband at 6:00 AM that I couldn't go in. He was understanding. However, while I was getting our day started, he got on the phone with MIL—who began sobbing because I was staying home, ruining her plans to have a day alone with her son and grandson.

Immediately, my husband’s demeanor toward me turned cold and standoffish. He asked if I had plans to leave the house. I explained I was exhausted, planned to nap, and promised to stay out of their way. Over the phone, he offered to take MIL and the baby to the zoo. I immediately stepped in and said, "No, you will not." The zoo was a milestone experience I had been eagerly waiting to share together as a family alongside our close friends—not to mention how unfair it felt to exclude my parents, who help raise our baby daily, in favor of an out-of-town guest.
My husband hung up, claiming it was just the first idea that popped into his head. I went upstairs to sleep after asking him to wake me when the baby was hungry so I could nurse. Around 12:30 PM, he woke me up saying the baby refused his bottle and was still hungry. When I walked downstairs, the baby was in MIL’s lap; as soon as he saw me, his face lit up. I took him, he calmed down immediately, and he began nursing.

MIL immediately looked dejected. She got up, put on her shoes, and announced she was going for a walk. My husband joined her with the dog. When they returned, I handed the baby back to MIL and went upstairs to take a bath and clean for three hours—trying to give her the space she wanted, despite how hard it was to be separated from my baby.

At dinner, my husband invited MIL to ride in my car without asking me first. Exhausted and stressed, I ordered a glass of wine at the restaurant just to cope. Afterward, MIL insisted on taking pictures of the three of us; she took a dozen photos, but when I asked her to send them to me, she only sent a single one.

The next afternoon, my father-in-law called my husband to "educate" him on the risks of postpartum depression and anxiety, reporting that MIL was deeply upset by how "unwelcoming" I had been.

My husband then asked me if scheduling more frequent visits would help the situation. I told him absolutely not. He of course was offended by how fast I retorted that.

I want my son to have a relationship with his paternal grandparents, but at what point does it cost me my own mental health? Or possibly my marriage?

I need some advice, personal stories or what would you do’s.

I am 37+3 days. My baby is measuring very large. Especially her abdomen measuring above the 99th percentile. Every single growth scan since week 26 has shown rapid weight gain.

I am considered high risk due to my age (just turned 35, first time mom) and I have gestational diabetes which I am on very high insulin dosages for.

I am schedule for an induction at 39 weeks. Baby is estimated to be almost 10 lbs by then.

She was measuring 8lbs 15oz yesterday at 37weeks+2

I am looking at pros and cons of both a planned c-section and to try to have a vaginal birth. I am worried about an emergency c-section situation, injury to baby and vaginal trauma.

Side note, we also had to have amniocentesis and fetal
Blood transfusion because baby had anemia.

What would you do?

My son was born with a lot of hair that grew into beautiful curls! Since it's summer time I decided to cut it because he was getting a little sweaty under all his hair. We told the stylist just a trim and she gave him a full on haircut! The stylist cut off all his curls and he doesn't look like a baby anymore. I feel like I took away his babyhood after cutting his hair. I know all of this sounds silly because it's "just hair" but does anyone with this experience know if infant hair grows back fast?

Hi all! I’m a FTM and I’ve been reading a lot about “matrescence” in the context of what’s happening to me biologically, socially, spiritually, etc., and I wonder if you have come across any articles or books that can holistically explain what’s happening to me? I see a lot of articles explaining the science, but not so much the others, so any recommendations would be greatly appreciated!

I'm due with our first in December and due to the nature of my partners industry (live theater) we are having to make some of our decisions now to work around show schedules.

I have 16-18wks of leave through the state (depending on vaginal vs C-section), but won't be going back to work after, so will just be using it all at once.

My partner has at least 12wks through the state, so that's what we're counting on until we have a more final idea of their work leave later in the year. They are union and have tons of protections, so their job would only have more leave, not less.

Our current sort of plan is for them to take at least 1 month right off the bat, with the potential for 2 if it's feeling dicey. However, we'd really love to save the last 4 weeks for the summer when baby is ~6mo old and a) they usually have some dead time anyway, and b) we could drive up to see family and stay for a couple weeks.

I'm a nanny of 12 years and have worked with very new babies, so I know what the newborn care bit is like, but not the postpartum part.

Based on your experiences, will I first off, want the 3 months of help right off the bat? And secondly, is it way too overzealous to believe we could manage a 7hr road trip with a 7mo old baby? We can stop overnight to split it into two ~4 hour days.

have any of y’all experienced a pretty dramatic change in your cycle after giving birth ??

my period was never super regular or reliable, it’s a little more regular now though. each PP period has been pretty different from the last, but definitely different than pre-baby.

i’m just wondering if changes are generally normal or if i should be concerned !

I love my baby so much, but im not looking to have anymore surprises. I’m terrible at remembering to take medication so the pill is not an option for me. I’m getting an IUD placed tomorrow and i’m honestly terrified. My 6 week pelvic exam was rough. I still have tears that are healing and the pressure from just her finger was really painful, so i’m a little concerned about an entire speculum. She told me it’s super easy for most people and i should only experience minor cramping. Mind you, she also told me a cervical check would just feel like minor cramping but i damn near saw the gates of heaven for every single one. If you got an IUD shortly after having a baby, how was it? TIA!

We've had a wild ride with my now-3 month old (postpartum pre-e, she had a scary hospitalization herself, moved across the country when she was 8 weeks old) so we are deciding to celebrate her with a Sip and See! We didn't have a shower for her since we lived in another part of the country so this will be the first gathering for her.

It's a few weeks away so gathering decor and activity ideas. Theme is Cafe Bebe and will have coffee bar, cafe pastries, etc.

Wondering if anyone did any activities they loved or had something special there? We did a shower for my first and had some traditional baby shower games but since this daughter is already here I'm looking for other ideas!

We just got approved for a new apartment we’re super super excited about(no stairs in/out, not a complex, a garage!!!). But it just set in that we will be moving across town with a 6 month old lol.

To make it better he just started rolling over and will be getting more mobile v v soon. My in-laws are in town and I’m sure will be able to watch him and we have a pack n play. Any advice is much appreciated!!!

For context, husband now works from 3:30pm to 2:30am. I’m a SAHM to our 13 month old and a
9 year old. The baby sleeps through the night in their own room, still breastfeeding during the day.

How did you make it work in the newborn stages with a work schedule like this? What would be the best way so we both aren’t running on fumes? We didn’t have this type of schedule with our 2nd so it was easy for us to figure out a routine.

I'm 35 weeks pregnant and have a 2 YO. It's just my husband and I, so I have zero help while he's at work.

These past few weeks have been particularly difficult and I've just been so damn mad and I feel like I'm being so mean to my daughter. I haven't yelled at her or anything, but I've been really snippy. She'll start fussing/crying over something (i.e., eating a banana in bed) and instead of calmly explaining why we don't do x, y, z etc. like I usually would, I just get really frustrated and just tell her to quit it with a raised voice.

I feel bad because that's not the type of parent I want to be. I don't know what to do. I'm already on an antidepressant and anti-anxiety medication.

I'm tired, hungry, dehydrated. There's still 45 million things to do before this baby comes. My daughter is going through some sort of sleep regression because nap and bedtime are now 1+ hour screaming events. She doesn't listen to me. Potty training is hell. Everything keeps breaking (AC, water leakage, engine light, fucking ants getting in for some reason even though it's clean?????).

Just needed to vent.

My baby will be 4 months next week, but I’m not introducing purées until 6 months. Every time I think of it, I get overwhelmed. Lol.
1) My baby is getting so grown and I feel like I just birthed him.😭
2) I just don’t know what the heck to make him.
Ive essentially prepared for everything except making purées. I do own a ninja baby food processor. I wish I had done more research because I didn’t know they made steamers and processors combined.
Anyway, I just need help with finding recipes and where to look to learn more about this stuff. I want to make sure I’m incorporating enough iron into his diet.
Anyone have recommendations? I have a high chair and different food utensils, freezer molds in my Amazon cart. I just need guidance on where to get info and recipes.

I hate hearing “oh well wait till they start crawling, walking, talking, etc” when I say I’m excited about something my baby is doing. I was talking to my husbands grandma about how happy I was about his cooing sounds and she was like “you say that now but wait till he starts talking” and the smile just dropped off my face because why did you have to turn this negative. Why do people feel the need to do this. I’m genuinely excited for him to do all those things and be able to watch him grow. I’m even excited for the emotional puberty stage. If you didn’t like being a parent just say that but there’s no need to try to bring an excited parent down. I know it’s hard but that doesn’t mean I’m not looking forward to it. My job for 5 years before I had my kiddo was in home care for kids with developmental disabilities so I definitely know what I’m getting myself into by having my own kid. And the people saying this to me know that so I don’t know why they say it like I have no idea what’s ahead. Anybody else deal with this?

For reference, LO is a little older than 7 months. She started daycare at a larger daycare center at 3.5 months old. I love our center and have no complaints!

Somehow we managed to keep our December baby illness-free for the first 14 weeks of her life. I got the RSV and flu shot while pregnant, and others in her life got relevant vaccines, as well.

But she started daycare on a Monday at the end of March and got sneezy/sick 2 days later. She. Has. Literally. Been. Sick. Since. The. Beginning. Of. April!!!! It is now almost August!

Like literally no break. I took her to the doctor a few times and they checked her ears and everything and said they were just "rolling" daycare colds and she is fine. She has had a few days where she seems a little better (but still snotty/sneezy) and then it'll go back to more intense cold. The other day she seemed worse than usual, so I took her in and they said she had adenovirus in her throat, but again no ear infection and she is fine. They told us to continue what we're doing: Increasing hydration (breastmilk), snot sucking, saline drops, humidifier, have her in the bathroom when you have steamy showers, Tylenol if she seems extra fussy.

I was prepared for her to be sick some. But not literally constantly for almost 5 months! I know it's the whole "first year of daycare" thing but I didn't know that meant every moment! I was hoping she would get even a week or so break from being sick, but no such luck and now that it's almost August, we're almost coming up on Fall/Winter colds again :(

She is still so happy, pleasant, eats well, has good diapers, playful, ahead on her milestones, super active, great sleeper (minus the nighttime coughing), so she does not seem miserable.

Again, I was prepared for sick, and my husband and I have miraculously not gotten sick. But I'm asking this because the other kids in her class don't seem to be sick like this!? Is she going to be one of those kids who's sick all the time as an adult (for reference and *knock on wood*, my husband and I almost never get sick)?

I wouldn't be so worried if other kids in her class were also sick like this, but they're not?! Pediatrician says she's fine and it's normal. She also said to prepare for it to get worse as she gets to be toddler age, so that's fun! But to my other daycare parents, what was your experience?

Hi all! I had my baby 4 months ago via c section. I have been experiencing on & off gallbladder pain every now and then but it subsides. The past 3/4 days I have had gallbladder pain causing shoulder blade pain and lower back pain. While I was pregnant I felt this pain in my right rib but found out my baby’s head was there so chopped it up to that being the reasoning. Now I’m wondering if that wasn’t the case. Has anyone experienced gallbladder issues postpartum? At around 3am last night I was pretty sure I needed to go to the hospital as the pain was so bad while lying down. I obviously have a 4 month old to take care of so running to the hospital isn’t really an option unless it’s a dire need. I have scheduled a GI appt in 5 days. This is just causing me a whole bunch of anxiety since really the main treatment is surgery. I can’t leave my baby. I’m also breastfeeding on top of all this. I have been barely eating so that I don’t cause even worse pain and that’s not helping anything. Any advice is helpful. Thanks in advance 🤍

This is a bit embarrassing but I am 3years pp. Ever since giving birth I have been unable to jump without peeing myself a little bit. I thought in the first 2 years it might clear up as it took a while for my body to recover but it’s just gotten worse over time. I’m only in my early 20’s and have only had 1 kid, I’ve spoken to my mum about it and she said she only had problems after having 4 and being in her late 30s. I’ve been getting into exercise a lot more in the past 2 months so this issue has only become more and more apparent. I’ve tried kegels, yoga, Pilates etc. but nothing has really helped. Has anyone else had this issue? I’m a bit too embarrassed to see a dr since all my other issues pp were chalked up to “anxiety” and the last thing I want is another dr telling me I’m making things up