I'm sure you're just like me. Brimming with good stories from ranger school and surrounded by peers that can't stand to hear another one. So go ahead, regale me with your tales.
So there I was, deep in the shit in the Darby recycle barracks. Day 3 of random details had left us bored and unenthused. Even with 3 meals a day we still felt like we were starving from the three weeks prior, and wouldn't you know it, they kept our lunch MREs in the janitors closet INSIDE our barracks.
We were one locked door away from a caloric surplus. So I and a friend did what any of you would do: got every paperclip and old credit card we could source and tried to jimmy the lock. We drew a small crowd of hungry recycles, desperate to see us succeed. It took 20 minutes of finesse but we actually got the door open. Before us was easily 100 boxes of MREs. It was perfect. We could crack a few boxes and bury the trash among the pile, it wouldn't be discovered for at least a month and they'd have no proof it was us.
Until our barracks manager shows up, the only one of us to have done 2 Darby's and was waiting for his third shot. He flips out, convinced we'd get caught, and threatens to tattle if we don't shut the door immediately. Defeated by the enemy within, we shut the door.
Side story- We would also steal ice cream from the DFAC on our way out every day. When presented with the problem of disposing of the evidence, someone had the excellent idea of smashing a hole in the drywall, where we all stuffed our ice cream sandwich wrappers, and just taped over it. Somehow, nobody ever noticed that the ice cream freezer went from full to empty in 72 hours.
So we re-insert into our second Darby, or in our friend's case, his third, and things are going much better for me this time. We get into our second FTX and our friend is doing not good. He gets his second look, an actions-on PSG look, and he is drowning. In the midst of hitting our objective, with casualties piling, he turns to me (his RTO), and just says "I'm done." Walks to the road, takes his helmet off, and sits down. Quits on the spot.
So not only did he prevent us from having a few extra meals during our recycle period, he went through all the trouble of 3 Darby's just to quit at the 11th hour. I don't remember your name, but if you're reading this, I hope you got bullied when you got home without a tab