A New York Minute - How Cats: The Jellicle Ball Helped Me Conquer My Fear
If you had told me five years ago that I would make a literal day trip to New York City by myself just to see a production of Cats (a musical in which I used to despise), I would have laughed in your face. Let’s go over all the things that led me to this moment.
I grew up poor. We didn’t take vacations or go visit big cities. Going to Nashville on field trips was the extent of my city experience. My first flight was in college (when I got to go to Europe for the first time with the TN Tech Chorale). I was the definition of a country boy who didn’t get out much. But I LOVED Broadway. I used to dream of going to New York to see some of the shows and actors I admired from cast albums and Youtube bootlegs. It wasn’t until 2018 when I finally got to go to New York for the first time (thanks again to Craig Zamer and the Tech choirs). New York theater was everything I could’ve imagined. My first Broadway show was Hello, Dolly starring Bernadette Peters. BERNADETTE PETERS, the star of one of my favorite shows of all time (Into the Woods), was performing live in front of me. That first trip to New York was incredible, and I lived so many of my poor country kid theater dreams.
My mom always wanted me to follow my dreams and do what makes me happy. She used to talk about all the places she wanted to visit - places she would see on tv. She wanted me to do the things she couldn’t do, financially and physically. If it was up to her, I would be a professional performer right now. She was my absolute biggest fan.
Fear has always kept me away from doing things. The fear of failure, the fear of not having enough money, the fear of being inadequate. When my mom died, I started getting this feeling that I needed to really live life more. We never know when our time will come. I want no regrets when I die.
In October 2025, my best friend and favorite travel partner, Whitney, asked me if I wanted to go to New York with her for fall break. I originally said no, but the more I thought about it, the more I could hear my mother’s words in my ear telling me to go. I had the money. That trip was a week of pure bliss. It made me much more comfortable with the city as a whole. We immediately started planning our trip for next fall break.
The one show I HAD to see? Cats: the Jellicle Ball. Fast forward to last Monday. I was sitting at TN Arts Academy when Whitney sent me a text saying that the Jellicle Ball was closing August 8th, months before we were going to see it. My heart sank. I needed to see this show. Throughout the week at TN Arts Academy we had industry professionals speak to us every day. Every day, I was more inspired by them.They spoke about the transformative power of the arts and how we only have one life to live, so take the chances. I could FEEL my mother’s presence telling me to go see Cats before it closes. My schedule is PACKED until August 8th, and I had one day I could see it. I started searching for flights and tickets and realized that I could make a day trip on a Wednesday, see the matinee, and make it back the same day without missing anything at home. I had the money. I had the time. The issue? I’ve never travelled alone, I’ve never ridden the subway, and I was absolutely terrified. Even so, I bought the tickets. The details would come later. In the week leading up to my whirlwind trip, I watched so many videos about riding the New York City subway that I felt like I was Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat herself. I was prepared. I was excited but still terrified.
I parked my car at a parking spot close to the airport. I got to my gate fine. The flight to LaGuardia was smooth. Thanks to my extensive research, I got from my gate to the bus just fine. I got onto the subway easily to quickly realize I was going the wrong direction. I didn’t panic, I just got off at the next stop and turned around. I was proud of myself for figuring that out. Ha. Once I arrived in Times Square I started getting more comfortable. I knew my way around this area since Whitney and I walk everywhere when we go. I had a lovely lunch, shopped around some, and got in line for the show.
It was life changing.
Cats: the Jellicle Ball opened on Broadway in spring of 2026. It reinvented the story of Cats by placing it in the modern day Ballroom scene. The website for the musical says
“Ballroom refers not to the waltz or tangos but to a culture whose origins trace back to 1960’s Harlem. Not to be confused with drag pageants or drag balls but deriving from them, Black and Latinx trans drag queens began to build a space for themselves due to the discrimination faced in white-run drag pageants. Founded by trans women of color, Ballroom has evolved since its conception but has continuously held true to its roots of providing space to celebrate the marginalized, prioritize community, and redefine family.”
So it’s Cats, but they aren’t actually cats. My problem with Cats as a musical was that it had no purpose or storyline. By setting it in the Ballroom, there was a purpose. Each “cat” is competing for the grand prize by presenting a set of different categories (Vogue, face, realness, runway, etc). Old Deuteronomy is not just an old cat, but now the head judge (a highly respected elder in the Ballroom scene). Munkostrap is now the MC of the ball. Griddlebones is now the DJ. Gus the theater cat is now an elderly founding pioneer of the culture (played by actual Ballroom pioneer Junior LaBeija). Grizabella is now a washed up homeless trans woman who used to bring home trophies in her youth. Jennyanydots and MaCavity now serve as Haus Mothers for the younger “cats”. Sillibub, the youngest “cat” is now a young trans girl coming into her own as she’s welcomed into the scene. The other characters are part of the competition as well, each serving as competitors in the Ball.
I have NEVER witnessed anything like this in a theater. It was two and a half hours of unapologetic black and brown queer JOY. It honored our history while celebrating our present. In a political environment where queer people are often told to hide themselves, the Jellicle Ball encouraged them. The show was inventive. It was interactive. It was colorful. It was GAYYYY. Cats: The Jellicle Ball was 60 years of queer history put on a stage to the tune of a reinvisioned Andrew Lloyd Weber score. I got to see theater LEGEND Andre DeSheilds be completely himself as an 80 year old black gay man. Chastity Moore’s rendition of “Memory” made me sob. Her ascension into the Heavyside Lair at the end felt like a victory for the entire trans community. I got to see this gorgeous cast perform their absolute TAILS off (pun intended) as a full audience celebrated them for their talents in a world that is actively trying to strip them of their rights.
When the show ended, I rode that high for the rest of the night. I ate dinner, shopped around some more, and rode the subway and bus back to LaGuardia. The flight was easy, and I was back in my own bed shortly after midnight. I couldn’t stop smiling when I got home. I had actually done it.
Cats: The Jellicle Ball wasn’t just a show I went to New York to see, it was a full on pilgrimage. It was the culmination of 32 years of learning who I am. It was confirmation that I can do the scary things. Going to New York for ONE DAY just to see gay Cats was not on my list of things I would ever do, but it was exactly what I needed. It was affirming.
And my mom would’ve LOVED that I did it.