Basically the title. I sat at the back of the bus once when she started also using the same bus rather than relying on Ubers all the time (I told her to get a monthly buspass instead). And for some reason I get overly competitive over very mundane things only.

So that day I wonder, "could I beat her if I got off the bus early?" Dumb thought, I know. But I got off the bus a whole stop earlier than normal and began my walk. The bus drove past me and everything but I just wanted to win this one-sided battle against her.

Speed walked like I NEVER did before. I was gonna solo her in this mental race of mine without her even knowing.

She was on her phone too but i figured it was fair cuz I gave her a headstart, yknow? Better players must give themselves slight handicaps if they wanna fight with equity.

I mean, she is a lady in her mid-thirties tbf. How much more merciful could I get...?

I obviously won that day. And every morning I do the same shit now. I started getting off two stops earlier instead just to be the goat I am.

I lost only one day out of the 4 months I've been doing this. She has no clue. No clue she's getting beat DAILY. I smile and say mornings to her, and she's clueless. She thinks I'm the kind youngest worker of the daycare. She has no idea the secrets I hide.

Sorry this is cringe as hell but I still gloat over it every morning. My smartwatch praises me, I get an ego boost before an entire day of being an awkward fuck, and she gets a nice smile in the morning. Win/win ig.

i'm a fully grown adult and every now and then i'll grab one of those little yogurt flavored milk drinks from the grocery store.

i know they're marketed toward kids and they're sitting right next to all the cartoon characters, but i genuinely like them. every single time i buy one i feel like someone is judging me even though nobody probably cares.

i've reached the point where i don't even try to hide it anymore. if i'm craving one, i'm buying it.

How embarrassing for me lmao.

Clever marketing strikes again!

Today I confidently kept pushing a door at a coffee shop.

I even pushed harder because I thought it was stuck.

A guy walked up behind me, quietly pulled the door open, smiled, and said, "It happens."

I've never wanted to disappear so badly.

I always eat my food in order of least favorite to most favorite so the last bite is the best. What is your strange unwritten rule?

This week I used black cocoa powder for the first time (the kind of cocoa that is used in Oreos to make them their dark color).

I made chocolate cake.

Black cocoa cake batter is the most melena-looking substance I've ever seen. I was shook. Can I tell anyone this? hell no! especially not the people i'm serving it to. no one wants to hear that their cake looks like stool with blood in it.

BUT IT REALLY DOES.

Now it's off my chest.

I got into an elevator with one other person. It was completely silent.

Trying to be friendly, I smiled and said, "Have a great day!"

They smiled back and replied, "You too."

Then I realized... we were both going to the same office floor and had to walk together for the next two minutes in complete silence.

Neither of us said another word.

That awkward walk somehow felt longer than the elevator ride.

Sooo Im.a 36yo f. I watched the cartoon Lili and Stitch when it first came out and was young loved it.

I feel.like at 36 im.more of a kid now internally. I watch all the shows from growing up and anything with like clothes for Rugrats. CATDog. Ed, edd, and eddie

Ah real.monsters. and so on.

So just wondered if people my age are the same? Or are yall grown ups? Lol

I walked into a clothing store carrying a coffee.

I moved aside because I thought someone was standing in front of me.

I even smiled and said, "Thanks."

A few seconds later I realized it was a mannequin.

The worst part?

Someone actually saw the whole thing and tried really hard not to laugh.

I'm still recovering from the embarrassment.

I received a video call from an unknown number and thought it was my cousin.

I answered with, "Finally! You're late!"

Everyone on the screen went completely silent.

Then an older woman smiled and said, "I think you've joined the wrong family."

I apologized, wished them a great day, and left immediately.

I still wonder if they still talk about that random guy who crashed their family call.

It isn't. Not even close. But he only makes it on special occasions because he thinks i love it. Can you just imagine every holidaysss! After all these years, i think i'm too deep into the lie to back out now. Or maybe I just truly love my husband? 😄

I grew up with older brothers and we all were competitive with one another, loved each other, but were definitely gonna compete and fight.

Anyway, so me and middle bro are hanging with our kids, his son and my son are exactly a year apart (soon to be 3 and soon to be 2). His son pushed mine really hard and he flew and fell down. He made a little cry, but then got up went over and pushed him back really hard. My dad pulled my son away, but when he let him go my son went back for two more hits.

I’m secretly proud he didn’t get walked over and to see he’s not a passive kid, even with someone older (although they are close to the same size).

That said, I’ve never seen him push one of his little buddies and he definitely got told about it not being nice to hit. And they were fine laughing with and hugging each other later. But as someone who used to fight with her brother, had a proud mom moment that my next generation still isn’t taking any shit. 🔥

Last year’s November I got into watching these mini dramas, a VERY common theme was people forgetting who the things actually belong to.

What I thought was this is something just in the drama but they definitely are not.

Now let me explain how I though

Last year in April my brother borrowed my Sony Wh-1000XM4, I was cool with it since I mostly used my Sennhesier HD600 usually.

Now I have taken back my Sony, since my brother should have returned in almost a year and half but he refused to do it

Infact he keeps asking me daily for headphones, which is weird to ask from a minor…

Luckily my mom and dad are on my side.

I think about this every so often because to sleep I NEED a stuff animal (all of mine have names) to sleep. Now I’m not obsessed with them or anything but it does feel like I have some sort of connection with them. Would you be put off if you knew someone that names their stuff animals/sleeps with one every night like a little kid lol? I’m just curious.

I know this is probably very popular but I love my own farts. Specially how they smell. I mean it’s like heroin entering my veins the amount of dopamine I get from the smell of my farts. And I WILL smell it. If i’m outside, I will run with the wind to catch up to it. In bed, i’m in the covers immediately. Standing up? I’m flipping a 180. If you don’t like your own farts, I deeply feel sorry for you because it’s my safe place.

I had a lot of issues with anger back then and I still don’t remember why I did that

Back in class, I was so hungry that I was joking about wanting to eat my chair. I was talking to my crush and mentioned how hungry I was.

He just smiled, gave me one of his biscuits, and went back to what he was doing.

It wasn't some dramatic romantic moment. He was just being kind.

The funny thing is that years later, I barely remember what I ate that day, but I still remember that biscuit.

The chair also remembers. It owes him its life.

I can’t stand seeing people chew food. They way they open their mouths to stuff the food in, like in the food ads, and the moment of the jaws to chew makes me literally gag. I don’t understand how people find food ads appealing. The sound people make when eating is even worse. I hate it when people say the sound, hmmmm hmmmm yummy, I find it revolting. Like in the movies when there is an eating scene I have to look away or put it on mute. problem is, most of the movies have eating scenes and most of the time the conversation is importance to the plot. I don’t watch movies or shows with proper chewing gum in them. The sound of the spoons hitting the dish gets on my nerves and makes me angry. YET, I love cooking and I make the best dishes you can eat. Best soups, steak, fish or any chicken dish. I love to entertain too Ace share food with my fries and family. And I watch a lot of cooking shows but I have to skip the testing parts and directly go to the results. Oh did I say, I’m a virgo?

So I have a really weird confession to make as a 33M. I have rare periods of loneliness that hit me, but I’m much better than I used to be about dealing with it.

I will sometimes look up old clips of Steve and Terri Irwin, and just marvel in awe at their love and passion for one another and their love for the environment and the animals they protect. It’s silly, the wholesomeness of it really keeps me grounded. It makes me think that with enough work on myself and toward my own goals I could end up in a similar situation.

Just the way the talked to and looked each other with such enthusiasm, it just made the world feel a little better.

And then… my own loneliness dissipates. I feel alright, but silly that it helps me refocus lol

My younger brother and I are polar opposites. He's a star football player. I was the president of the theater club. He spends his time throwing around a ball, I spend my time singing and dancing.

Except, he also kind of spends his time singing. When no one's around. And he's pretty decent at it. Like weirdly good, for someone with zero experience. I may or may not have begged him a couple of times to audition for the school musical because a) male talent is few and far between, and b) I'd just love to do a show with my little brother.

I'll catch him singing along to his playlist when he's working out or putting the dishes away. But he immediately clams up when he notices someone's in the room with him. He refuses to sing in the car even when the rest of my family is singing their lungs out.

The one place my brother does sing freely is in the shower. He'll put on his playlist and just belt it out. I don't know why, maybe it's a "if they can't see me, they can't hear me" mentality? Idk.

My bedroom is right below the upstairs bathroom. I can hear him crystal clear from there. I just love hearing him sing. And I'd love to sing with him, because I get to sing with my friends all the time, and that kind of love language just doesn't translate to my nonchalant tough-guy athlete brother I guess.

So I take what I can get, and I sing along with him to whatever he's singing. And it's just become a routine. It's my favorite part of the day. But I know that if I ever tell him that I like hearing him sing in the shower, he'll be embarrassed and stop. So I guess that's my secret to keep for now. I sing with my brother every night and he has no idea.

I've been plucking my nose and brow hairs by my bedroom window where the light is good and sprinkling them into the wind.

But rather than disperse my hairs, the wind or air pressure or whatever has been delivering these hairs through the window of my downstairs neighbour.

I didn't know any of this until I got a letter through the door that threatened to get the council involved.

The letter contained several annotated CSI-style close ups of my nose hair, referred to as 'trimmings', on my neighbour's window sill, looking like a threadbare carpet.

Maybe they had noticed the hair a while ago and had been building up a case.

Maybe they thought they thought the 'trimmings' were pubes.

Maybe I should go down there and clarify.

*TL;DR*: Downstairs neighbour threatened to get council involved after my nose hairs crossed their threshold.

When I was in secondary school, around 4th year so like 9th grade, my mum had forced me to take afterschool maths tutoring. I didn't know where the class for it was and two boys in my class were talking about maths tutoring.

So, like any normal person, I followed them. They walked into an empty class to talk to a teacher and I just assumed the club wasn't on yet so I stood in the doorway and nodded along to the conversation.

Someone said a joke and I audibly laughed, the teacher looked at me and said, 'im sorry, can I help you', I actually froze, like my face went red and I managed out the words, 'are you the maths tutor', she gave me a weird look and pointed me in the right direction. It was so awkward.

The cherry on top was the fact that I hardly spoke to them boys, I knew their names and that's about it, when I was walking with them and they spoke one word to me, I actually thought we had become besties, I can't cope.