Intersections of Trauma & Addiction

I quit doing heroin two and a half years ago but I kept smoking crack and doing meth. A year ago today I quit and I haven’t done anything but smoke weed since then. I go to a 12 step program, but this is the first time I’ve gotten any time when not living in sober living or something. I have a great life and I’m very grateful to have survived everything

Hey guys we all get addicted to something at some point in our lives. It can be anything like bad eating habits, watching corn, theft, cheating, alcohol, social media addiction, sugar addiction, gambling, doomscrolling, smoking.

What were you addicted to and how did you get over it?

Would love to hear your answers in the comments!

One of the more fun courses my treatment center held involved sharing music that resonated with recovery. I was looking to see if there's any more songs that would fit the theme. I find it's cathartic to listen to when I'm feeling low instead of turning to past behaviors like I would have done before.

Thinking more A Team, less Semi-Charmed Life

I feel pathetic. I've been a full blown addict since 14-15. I've used the point off and on for 7 years. Never got stuck on it. I had a three year break due to courts. This time around.. I'm stuck on it. Like I don't want to sit around and smoke all day till I get high but then hypocritically I'll sit there and stab myself until I can get high... I know it makes no since. N my arms look fucked up.. n my poor partner .. fuck. It kills him. He says what anyone would..

Half of addiction is the action

I can’t even tell you how many rock bottoms that I have had or how many times I should have just automatically never touch or even look at alcohol again… and this has been ongoing since high school. I have only been able to get sober the 2 times I got pregnant. for some reason, I can never just do it for myself. Maybe that’s because of how it makes me feel and that I’m trying to mask my demons but I know I need a healthy outlet… I have struggled with alcohol, weed, and xanax. Please let me know any tips/tricks/advice because I could really use it right now.

I (17f) have been struggling with a porn addiction since I was 12 years old, and I am currently 17, turning 18 this year.

It began when my friends introduced me to hentai. Over time, I gradually became more curious and started watching real porn. Initially, I stuck to simple, vanilla content with a man and a woman, which felt satisfying.

However, that soon stopped being enough, and I progressed to rougher videos involving tying and gagging women. For a period, that was what aroused me most. Eventually, things escalated further to rape porn, where I began imagining myself in those situations.

This has changed how I behave in everyday life—I find myself craving more physical attention from others. At the same time, I have been spending significantly more time at home because I have developed body dysmorphia, constantly comparing myself to the women I see in those videos, causing me to eat less. Staying at home has also caused me to discover a few..new habits, which I really want to stop.

I am scared that this will affect my life drastically the older I grow, and I am even more scared that I might do something very bad.

My 15-year-old sister is a meth addict. I don't know how to help her anymore.
I'm posting here because I'm completely lost and hoping someone who has been through something similar can offer advice.
My little sister is 15 years old and has been addicted to meth for roughly the last two months. There was a period of about two weeks where she told us she was sober, but looking back, I'm not even sure if that was true.
We recently found out that she's no longer just smoking meth—she's injecting it now, which has terrified our whole family.
The hardest part is that our parents have basically given up on her. They don't want her living with them and have made it clear they don't want the responsibility. Because of that, my siblings and I have all taken turns trying to care for her and keep her safe, but we're all young adults with our own lives, and we're completely out of our depth.
At the moment, she's living in unsafe environments with people who are also involved in drugs. We know she's not safe, but she refuses to come home or stay somewhere stable.
We had rehab organised for her, and we genuinely thought it was our best chance of helping her. At the last minute, she refused to go, and because she didn't consent, there wasn't anything we could do.
She was also placed in a youth refuge for a while, but she was recently removed by police after vandalising the property. Since then, things have only gotten worse.
We've tried getting help through DCJ, but we've essentially been told that because she's almost 16, they'll "work on her when she's of an age for independence." From what we've been told, the plan is for her to eventually live independently, but I can't understand how anyone expects that to help a 15-year-old who is addicted to meth.
I feel like we've exhausted every option we know of. We're terrified that if things continue the way they are, she's going to end up seriously hurt or worse.
I'm not looking for judgment. I'm looking for advice from people who've experienced meth addiction themselves, had a sibling or child go through it, or work in this area.
Is there anything else we can do when she refuses treatment?
How do you support someone who doesn't want help?
Are there services or approaches we might not have considered?
Has anyone been in a similar situation where a young person eventually turned things around?
I love my sister so much, and I don't want to give up on her, even though it feels like every service around us already has.
Any advice would mean a lot. Thank you for reading.

so the above question. the longest I’ve been sober was 6 months, I’m at around 2 right now and almost slipped about 9 times. had a sneak once so I guess not. I really am trying it’s just super difficult and u have all this other shit going on. how did you stop? how did you make your life worth being in so you stop checking out and using. how did things get changed around because right now things have slowly improved over time but I am still struggling a lot. I’m trying to make things better. and life worth enjoying. I’ve never gone to rehab but debated it many times. but I have so much good going for me starting in the fall and I don’t want to interrupt that either, despite how much I’m struggling. so what the fuck do I do. what helped you because I’m trying to fight a brick wall right now and it’s clearly not working.

One of my closest friends has changed a lot over the past year and our group doesn’t know how to help anymore.

He used to never use drugs when we went out. But he slowly started partying every weekend, then using more drugs, and now we’ve learned he’s using GHB regularly.

What worries us the most is that he’s told us about multiple occasions where he collapsed, was unconscious for hours, and woke up completely alone because the people he was with had left him behind. We don’t know these friends very well, but they’re the group that introduced him to sex parties, which he now attends frequently.

Recently, one of our friends spoke to him about it. He admitted that he has a problem, but that it’s a problem that makes him feel good.

We barely recognize him anymore. He disappears for weeks, rarely replies to messages, doesn’t call anyone back…

I’m living abroad, so I can’t be physically present, but I keep wondering whether I should send him a message just to let him know I’m here if he ever wants to talk. I don’t want him to feel judged, confronted, or like we’re trying to control his life. I genuinely just miss my friend and I’m scared that one day we’ll get a call saying something terrible has happened.

For anyone who’s been through addiction themselves or had a loved one in a similar situation:

Is there anything friends can actually do?
Should we keep reaching out even if he barely responds?
Is there a way to express concern without pushing him away?
At what point do you stop waiting for someone to ask for help?

I’d really appreciate any advice or experiences 🤍

My sister-in-law is in an absolute pit of an 18 month ketamine addiction. She's been really struggling with it non-stop for the last 6 months. She's been hospitalised and needed surgery after a fall while high, and then crashed her car high, wrote it off, and may be charged with possession as well as drug driving. Unfortunately, none of this has yet got to the stage where she can admit she needs help. She has kept it secret from her friends and work, and in any therapy/counselling sessions has only told them that she's depressed and has a bit of a drug problem. To put it in context, for the last 6 weeks she's probably been high 80% of the days, usually starting by 10am, often taking upwards of 4 grams at a time, sometimes more than 6. I took her to an NA meeting but she wouldn't go back, and I realised after that she drove us there high, which I can't try and do again.

My in-laws are now completely desolate, and are looking to try and take out a loan to get her into a private rehab facility, which they absolutely cannot afford to do. What are the other options here? She's clearly basically suicidal, she's probably got a BMI of under 15, and she's unable to get clean as it is, and she won't go to NA meetings. I know that no-one can make you get clean, it's something you have to do for yourself, but at this stage she's going to let her parents pay for rehab that probably won't work just because she won't be honest about other options, so please can someone let me know what help is actually available to someone in this scenario? Everything online is so vague.

Hi there, sorry not trying to make this a whole sob story and trying to write this in the most lucid, straightforward way that I can.

I’m a 33 year old man, battling cocaine addiction for years. Over the past three or so years it’s got very bad, sniffing most days, usually alone.

Much of my cocaine use revolves around sex; I have a lot of casual sex with people I meet on hook up apps. If I can’t find anyone I’ll usually spend the night watching porn. It has led to me often using crystal meth and using viagra so often I struggle to get an erection without it.

The cocaine habit has cost me my job, a lot of friendships, and I am in a serious amount of debt. Any money I get goes up my nose, even if I know that I desperately need it for rent and food.

The longest I’ve ever been without cocaine, since my early 20s, is probably a couple of weeks. I usually sniff about 4 days a week, the other days I am recovering. When I’m in work I usually sniff at work.

It’s been about two years of me openly admitting I am an addict. Some friends have tried to help but eventually given up because I wouldn’t change.

My addiction worries my mum to death so I have to downplay how bad it is.

I have tried everything, from cocaine anonymous meetings, deleting numbers, cutting off friend groups, taking up hobbies, asking dealers to block me.

I live in London, and cocaine is very accessible, even if I have deleted my contact list.

I’m unemployed and burning through the only money I have left. I have sought help through the NHS better lives, which is the only drug support network available for free. I would love to go to rehab but I don’t have the money.

I have been through all the cycles of guilt, shame, etc (I’m sure you’re familiar!)

I’m very scared, but also really exhausted. I hate this and am truly doing everything in my power to stop. I really don’t know where else to turn so thought I would write this!

I guess I’m hoping someone writes something that just hits me and changes my entire outlook, which I appreciate is a very tall ask lol.

I've been battling my addiction with meth for over 3 years and a half now. I've had multiple relapses, the last one scarred me the most. I was almost a year clean back then and the date I would've gotten my milestone was also my great grandma's birthday. She was very dear to me, and when I relapsed a couple days before, I felt so guilty.

My milestone might not be the same, but she's the reason I got sober. I'd want her to be proud of who I became and when I look back at pictures from when I was in active addiction, I'm proud of my path.

I'm one year sober from meth, I'd lie if I said that I haven't thought about it since, but it's not worth going back. For the first time in my life I see a somewhat future for myself, I'll hold onto that, onto how much I progressed and how I can keep progressing.

(Note: seeing my hair grow so much has some kind of meaning for me. Each time I shaved it I was high, it's never been that long in over 3 years.)

I'm asking for some advice here. drinking has taken half a year from me but I've been sober since the start of this summer. it's really a damn good feeling going to sleep knowing i didn't drink that day and not waking up hungover.

i had my reasons to quit. drinking became a hobby to me. it made me feel like crap when i didn't drink and i was never proud of it when i did. i feel bad for making my parents and my closest friends see me like that. it didn't really make me that miserable but i stopped before it got the chance to do it. i just decided this isn't the road i want to go down on.

and yet i still think about drinking. sometimes all i want to do is abandon all my sober thoughts and just enjoy myself. it used to be fun before the sickness and the regret. and all my reasons could be set aside if i think about it as an occasional activity. or even if i know it won't be only occasional. i feel the urge to go back to how i used to be, drinking whenever i felt like it. i plan my future in a way that'll leave space for drinking. i plan on how I'll let myself go after some time of sobriety. there's something in me telling me that sobriety doesn't have to be for life. and i don't know how to break free of these thoughts.

Just sharing to motivate all the members here. I used to consume porn at least 2x per day, it destroyed my relationships, goals and even my work. I was only able to change when I blocked ALL my triggers, literally all. Also, started to practice more sports. Keep going guys, we will win!

Hello, I don’t even know if this will make it onto the feed or if anyone will see this, but I really need help understanding addiction.
I’m currently talking to a guy who is addicted to pills, and I’m trying to understand what addiction is actually like from the perspective of people who have experienced it or loved someone who has.

One thing I’m wondering is whether people on pills remember things they say and do. For example, when someone is drunk they might say or do things they later regret or don’t even remember. Is it similar with Xanax or oxy, or is it different?

From what I know, he’ll take 1 mg of Xanax, then a couple of hours later take another 1 mg, sometimes pass out, and later use oxy by snorting it. I know mixing those drugs can be dangerous, and it has me worried.

Should I be concerned about getting into a relationship with someone whose drug use looks like this? Is it possible for someone using pills this way to maintain a healthy relationship and a stable life, or does addiction usually make that very difficult?

I’m not asking because I want strangers to tell me whether to leave him. I’m trying to understand what addiction is actually like so I can make informed decisions and have realistic expectations.

If you’ve struggled with pill addiction yourself or have been in a relationship with someone who did, I’d really appreciate hearing what it was like. What do you wish someone in my position knew?

I'm just so over everything. I'm exhausted, depressed, and pregnant with this guy's child. No matter what I do, I just can't seem to leave the father of my child for good because he always comes back or manipulates me into taking him back.

Every time I leave and go no contact, he lies or tries to make me worry so that I'll talk to him again. For example, he left his antibiotics at my place. I went no contact, and he said he desperately needed them, so I sent one message back saying, "Mailbox." A month later, they're still there.

He'll tell me he isn't in a good headspace, and then I feel guilty, so I let him back in. It's just the same bullshit every time. He has cheated on me in the past, is in active addiction ( Iclies, and talks to other women behind my back.

He keeps talking to this girl. She also uses drugs. I'm completely clean, by the way. However, I have told him over and over to stop talking to her because I already have massive trust issues from his previous behaviour. They video call, call, text almost every day, and send messages to each other like, "I miss you." He also told me that he bashed her boyfriend the other night because her boyfriend hit her in front of him.

I just paid for a holiday away, and he has slept for the majority of the time. Last night we had a fight because he thought I was asleep, so he grabbed his phone and went outside. I thought that was odd, so I went to the back door and overheard him talking to the girl on the phone. He said, "So, are you going to come see me on my birthday this weekend?" I quickly opened the door, and he hung up the phone.

I broke down, told him I was done, and he simply said, "No, we're not." He then said he would never let me have another boyfriend for the rest of my life and that I was stuck with him for good. I am unable to have any guy friends, or even stand next to a guy with out being yelled out. One of our mutual guy friends gave me a gift and I got yelled out, called names and then he tried to put his hands around my neck before pulling them quickly back and headbutting me instead. All for not showing him my phone after he called me names.

Is fentanyl a problem around the world or is the just the United States?

Hi everyone. I'm hoping to hear from people who have been in a similar situation, whether as a family member or someone who has personally struggled with meth addiction.

My brother is 28 and has struggled with meth addiction for several years. He had two years of sobriety, but relapsed in late 2023 and has been using heavily for most of the last 2.5–3 years. He is currently experiencing meth-induced psychosis. He's been in and out of the ER, detoxes, and mental health facilities, but he never stays anywhere long enough to get meaningful treatment. As soon as he's discharged, he goes right back to using.

My dad and I are considering pursuing involuntary commitment here in North Carolina. We've been researching the process, but before we move forward, we'd really like to hear from people who have experience with it. Our biggest fear is that every time he goes back to meth, he's putting himself at greater risk for permanent brain damage and making it harder for his brain to recover.

For family members:

• Did involuntary commitment help your loved one?
• Were they able to stay in treatment long enough to improve?
• Did it make a lasting difference, or did they go right back to using?
• Is there anything you wish you had known before pursuing it?

For those who have personally struggled with meth addiction or meth-induced psychosis:

• Looking back, would involuntary treatment have helped you?
• If not, what finally led you to accept help or get sober?
• Is there anything you wish your family had understood while you were in active addiction?

Thank you so much.

Hey guys, i’m working on trying to get off 7oh currently. i’ve been using 7oh for probably over a year i recently cut my usage from 200mg to 112mg in one go.

i just picked up some subs through quick md today i’ve got 14 8mg films. my problem is they want me to take 8mg 2 daily and then eventually go to a monthly plan which i dont want to do. that sounds like ill be trading one dependency for another.

how can i make these films last and get through the 7oh withdrawls with out building a dependency on subs??

has anyone done this before? i’m not looking for a totally painless recovery i just don’t want to hate living and i need to go to work.

I’m not looking for a seemless pain free recovery but i want to manage symptoms as best as possible so that i can go to work and not be up all night..

23 yr old daughter relapsed on fent on Saturday and attempted suicide.

She’s on 72 hour hold and scheduled to be discharged tomorrow. She refuses to go to residential, dual residential or inpatient. She knows she can’t come back to the house after she broke the agreement and used.

She attended residential for 25 days, on subs, attended IOP the last 2 weeks living at home. IOP discharged her because of the suicide attempt.

Boundaries:
The rule was, no fent use (attend IOP) or if relapses, back to residential.

She relapsed & when I hold her were packing her suitcase to leave to a residential, she attempted suicide by slashing her wrist badly.

I need to be prepared if she shows up tomorrow just thinking she can go back in her room & refuse to leave. On top of the fent addiction, I’m terrified that she’ll attempt suicide again. I’ve removed all knives from the house.

I was trying to avoid her hitting “rock bottom” and kicking her out. As much as I wish IOP was enough so she could live at home while attending IOP Monday-Friday it’s not.

I’ll help her find residential treatment but she can’t stay at the house until she’s actively sober.

Does kicking them out or giving the ultimatum of residential or streets make a person want to get help?

This is all new to me and doing this alone.
I appreciate any advice to help. Thank you

Hello voilà 3 jours que j'ai pas pris de C ça peut paraitre rien pour la plupart des gens mais pour moi c'est un grand pas..

En fait mon ex le père de ma fille que je suis bien obligée de côtoyer tout le temps s'est mis à brasser ce qui bien évidemment ne m'aide pas du tout..

Mais y'a quelques jours je me suis dis que j'en avais vraiment marre de lui filer tout mon pognon pour ça et en plus il me taxe sans arrêt pour que je paye pour les activités qu'il veut faire avec notre fille car soit disant il n'a pas de sous..

Exemple c'était la vogue et il a fait appeler ma fille pour je lui donne des tunes pour qu'elle puisse faire des manèges...

Il m'envoie aussi souvent des messages pour me dire qu'il vient de récup..etc

Bref voilà c'est mon déclic pour stopper tout ça j'ai vraiment plus envie d'être cette personne...

Et faut bien qu'il ai quelq'un qui assure pour les enfants donc je suis déterminée à continuer sur cette voie. 💪

J'espère tenir longtemps au pire je ferai un update si jamais je craque mais je pense vraiment encore fais un grand pas.

Force à toutes les personnes qui luttent comme moi , c'est dur, courage

I tought that I saw everything but things are getting worse.

Nearly a month ago i started to use cocaine daily , i wanted to get rid of it maybe using some more potent stuff and stay sober for a couple of days.

Recently i found an acetone washed speed and thought that was what I was searching.
I was wrong and it litteraly changed my addiction to it.
With coke was always a regret even the start because with it I was drinking too and had serious comedowns, with speed no its totally different.

I wake up tired but can go to a morning walk then go to gym and come home and have a good breakfast, but after that I start to use speed. All the tirediness go and i can have good time focusing and do thing, i redose a lot and j the evening i take diazepam and in a couple of hours i can sleep.
This is going for more than a week daily and i started to increase the dose and feel tirediness in my heart but still can’t stop it.

I can deal with a lot of things but this is another level for me and i dont know how to stop.
I tried to go to NA before for cocaine but cant feel good there.

After years i really recognise 100% that im destructing my body but its more hard than coke.