r/SipsTea 4h ago

Chugging tea Not wrong!

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20.0k Upvotes

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17

u/SnooDoggos5226 3h ago

Not dead, but I’m assuming severe dementia or loss of cognitive function that would render him unable to perform.

17

u/Left-Mechanic6697 3h ago

I believe he’s alive, but only technically. My guess is he’s a vegetable hooked up to life support until they’ve stalled enough. Then they’ll pull the plug and let him die.

If he were as able-bodied as those doctored PR photos make him look, a quick press conference, or a zoom call with the governor would quickly put the matter to rest. But they aren’t doing that and it speaks volumes.

2

u/Just_A_Mad_Scientist 3h ago

Mitch McConnel rn

2

u/Unlikely-Key-234 1h ago

Personally I think he's awake, but his brain is toast to the point that he can't form a sentence. If he were in a vegetative state hooked up to machines then that would mean the photo they released was fake, which no reputable organization is claiming, and in my opinion would have been a wildly unnecessary risk for them to take. Not saying it's above them to fake a photo, but I just don't think the risk vs reward calculus was there for something so likely to blow up in their faces.

0

u/SnooDoggos5226 2h ago

I’m guessing that, for National security reasons, they can’t allow him to speak to anyone without similar clearance and authorization because they don’t know what he’ll say and can’t trust him to maintain protocol.

2

u/Beard_o_Bees 2h ago

'Hey Mitch, give us one beep for everything's great, and two beeps if not.

<beep>

See, he's in perfect health! Just a routine, preventative intubation!

Oh, his GCS score is 3, which is the best you can get!

2

u/SnooDoggos5226 1h ago

I’m guessing they’re afraid he’ll say something like “Bin Laden is alive and living in Podunk Arkansas” and now the press needs to investigate and it turns out it’s a Taliban spy living there who just got outted