Hello everyone,

I'm in a situation I didn't expect and I'm not sure how to handle it.

A few days ago, a coworker and I were talking about salary raises and the cost of living and I didn't really see a reason to hide it, so I told them. They shared their salary too, and we realized there's a pretty big difference even though we do almost the same job. 

I didn't think much of it at the time. I wasn't trying to cause problems or encourage anyone to complain so I just answered honestly.
Well, word got around the office.

now my manager called me into their office and said HR wants to meet with me. They didn't say anything but they did mention that talking about pay can "cause problems" in the workplace.
Now I'm stressed because I honestly wasn't trying to start drama or get anyone upset. It was just a conversation between coworkers.
I've read that employees can discuss their salaries, but I don't know if that's true everywhere or how I should handle the meeting with HR.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did you handle the HR conversation, and is there anything I should or shouldn't say during the meeting?

Thanks in advance

Thought I’d share this wee story. For a long time, I thought the only way to get ahead was to outwork everyone. Work late, take on everything, never say no. It worked for getting recognized as a dependable worker, but it also trapped me there. People saw me as the person who pulls the plow, not the person who steers it.
Things only shifted when I stopped treating my job like a solo performance and started focusing on how I actually interacted with the people around me. That meant I actually had to work a bit less and spend more time chatting and messaging people, ironically.

Hard work still mattered, you can't fake competence, but grinding in silence was not getting me the big win. CEOs have vision and inspire. I decided to shift from “employee” to “leader” and broaden my relationships across the whole company. Added benefit, I understood the total org better. I could identify opportunities, and instead of staying in my lane, I could provide some thoughts on broader challenges which needed solving.

So, here we have a few things that changed:

- I stopped trying to solve every problem myself. Instead, I started giving the team the space and support to solve things on their own and yet identifying a challenge and getting corporate buyin to tackle it.

- I stopped wearing "busy" as a badge of honor. Nobody cares how many hours you worked; they care about what actually got accomplished. Even better when I or “we” solved a problem I highlighted.

- I started building real relationships across other departments instead of just staying in my own lane. Huge. Something needs done? I reach across the organisation. People generally were exited to help solve issues.

That shift in how I showed up every day completely changed how leadership perceived me. Over a few years, it moved me from an individual contributor to VP of my department . I suspect I’ll be running the company in the not too distant future when leadership retires.

If you feel like you're working yourself into the ground but going nowhere, take a look at how you're dealing with people. Being great at your job gets you noticed, but lifting up the people around you to solve issues is what actually moves you up. People want to matter and if you can build up those around you, every one is better off. I’d say, you don’t even need to stab anyone in the back, but ya, watch out for those about to. They’ll get weeded out eventually though.

Not looking for generic advice.Just curious about the habit,skill,or mindset that made the biggest difference for you.

Hi,

I (23F) ended up crying on a Teams call in front of my associate today and I’m so embarrassed.

I’ve been finding the job (consulting) extremely difficult. I’ve been working 12 hour days and skipping lunch recently (which I know is what you get with this job, so can’t really complain, but I just feel so drained and exhausted).

I keep making silly mistakes and I just constantly don’t understand the work. I feel stressed out all the time and I just hate every minute. I keep catastrophising e.g. if people don’t respond to my messages or if I’m not invited to a call - I must be doing an awful job but I already feel like I’m on the verge of collapse, I just don’t know what to do. Can’t understand why they hired me, anyone in my coworkers’ position would prefer another analyst and overall I just feel like I’m a massive drain on my teams.

Today was particularly bad. My direct associate was extremely busy so I said I’d try and pick up the work. Well, long story short, I did such a shit job that I might as well just not have turned up in the first place. Spent hours doing a shit piece of analysis which no one looked at anyway, fucked it all up and have almost nothing to show for it. And it’s only going to get worse tomorrow. I feel like I can’t complain because I’m the most junior person - I’ve got the relatively easiest work, but still can’t fucking do it, it’s pathetic.

I basically ended up crying on a Teams call. Probably the most embarrassing moment I’ve ever had at work. He was very nice about it, but I feel absolutely awful. I don’t know how jt feels to have a junior person almost sobbing at you but probably not great. I feel like I’m just going to be seen as a stupid little girl who can’t control her own emotions, coming off as really unprofessional and giving a worse impression than I already have.

How common is this sort of thing? And what can I do to try and make it better? I feel like I’m in such a bad place that I can’t think logically about it.

I’m worried they’ll kick me out the project or just stop giving me opportunities, because why on earth would they want to work with me. Any advice appreciated, the more honest the better, because I need to sort this out. Thank you!

I've been stuck in my own head for weeks, and I honestly don't know what the right thing to do is.

There's a girl I've fallen deeply in love with. We became friends, and from the very beginning I felt like there was something special between us. Maybe I misread things, maybe I didn't - I genuinely don't know. Sometimes I feel like she might like me too, and other times I convince myself that she's simply a kind person who treats everyone well.

The hardest part is living in that uncertainty.

Every little thing makes me overthink. She recently posted some song lyrics on her story that said something like, "the world was on fire, and no one could save me but you." My first thought was, "I wish I were that person." Then another thought hit me: "What if she's talking about someone else?" I know they're just lyrics, but when you care about someone this much, your mind starts filling in the blanks.

Her birthday is in about two weeks.

I've already picked out a gift - an aesthetic notepad set with stickers, washi tape, and a handwritten birthday card. I want the birthday card to be exactly what it should be: wishing her a happy birthday and letting her know how much I appreciate her as a person.

But I had another idea.

I thought about writing a second letter - a letter where I finally tell her how I feel. Instead of giving it directly, I thought about hiding it somewhere inside the gift with a small note on the envelope saying something like:

Part of me thinks it's romantic because there's no pressure to read it immediately.

Another part of me worries that it would unintentionally make her birthday about my feelings instead of hers, and that's the last thing I want. I want her birthday to be about celebrating her, not creating an emotional obligation.

The truth is, I'm scared.

I'm scared that I've mistaken friendship for something more.

I'm scared that she deserves someone better than me.

I'm scared that if I tell her how I feel, I'll lose someone who has become incredibly important to me.

At the same time, keeping these feelings inside is becoming harder every day.

So I'm asking for honest advice.

If you were in her position, how would you feel about finding a hidden letter like that? Would it feel thoughtful and romantic, or would it feel like too much?

I'd especially appreciate hearing from people who have either confessed their feelings this way or received a confession in a similar way. I don't want to make a decision based only on what I want -I want to think about how it would make her feel too.

I recently (9 months ago) joined a new company coming from one previously where I was a senior analyst and had been for a while. The company is great, hence my eagerness to join it, but the only position they were offering at the time was an analyst level - they recognised in the interview I was overqualified for it and said I could take the senior analyst role in 6 months when the senior analyst left (he was on a contract). I took the job on that basis (my mistake).

Fast forward to today and they didn’t even interview me for the senior analyst role and gave it to someone younger and more junior to me.

This is also bearing in mind I scored a perfect review in my annual review (it’s scored and I overachieved in every category) and have been nominated for numerous internal awards at our annual gala for high performance.

I don’t know what to do now as the senior analyst role won’t come available for a while (until the new person leaves) and I only just started in this role…

The process:

1. Find the relevant hiring & leadership contacts behind any job you are applying.
2. Get their work email.
3. Write a personalized job application(cover letter) from scratch with ur resume, send it.
4. Follow up in 2 days if i dont hear a reply
5. Repeat everything for the next job.

It requires manual effort, but it will sure land you to more replies & interview calls.

also there a are few tools which automate the above process in just a click behind any Linkedin job, will save you from manual drain you can also use them.

Hey everyone, looking for some advice from people who’ve navigated sensitive salary and management conversations before.

Up until recently, I was in a role that was technically at the same band/level as a manager in terms of scope, but I didn't have direct reports. A little while ago, I officially stepped into a Manager role. This brought on direct management of a team of 6, along with all the standard people leadership responsibilities—one-on-ones, performance reviews, admin, and general HR overhead with my same previous responsibilities.
The issue:
When this transition was discussed, I was explicitly promised a double-digit percentage salary increase to reflect the new people management responsibilities and expanded scope.
Fast forward to the actual offer/adjustment: the promised double-digit increase never materialized. Instead, I've taken on a significantly heavier workload and the added stress of managing a team for essentially the same pay I was making before.
Where I'm at right now:
Naturally, this situation has completely demotivated me. I feel like the goalposts were moved after I took on the extra responsibility.
I have a 1-on-1 coming up with my manager, and I really want to address this head-on. My main question is: How candid and honest can I actually be about how demotivated this has made me?
Is expressing genuine demotivation professional, or does it sound too emotional/ultimatum-adjacent in a corporate setting? How can I frame the conversation so that I make my point crystal clear without damaging my relationship with my manager or coming across as unproductive?
TL;DR: Moved into a manager role leading a team of 6. Was promised a double-digit bump in pay, but didn't get it. I want to tell my boss how demotivated this has made me, but I'm unsure of the best way to frame the conversation professionally. Any advice or scripts would be appreciated!

I noticed things going south in april like minor budget pauses, manager going quiet about the next appraisal cycle etc. Everyone around me said i was being paranoid. Maybe I was but i decided if i was right, i wasn't going to start from zero on day one.

So for 3 months, my 2nd job has been my jobhunt: fixed my resume properly for the first time in 6 years. rebuilt my linkedin profile. Reconnected with old coworkers before i needed anything from them, just compliments on what they’ve been sharing. Started interviewing casually in june, saved upto 4 months of living expenses.

Yesterday morning: "your role has been impacted."

And the strangest thing happened. and i was not scared - i read the email twice, shut the laptop, and went for a walk because i already had two final rounds scheduled this week and a recruiter waiting on my availability for a third.

i'm not posting this to humblebrag. its that anything can happen anytime. if you see telltale signs, start prepping.

bye, peace out.

I’m one of the few in the company with a fully remote position, that type of job is rare in my industry, but the company has had several bad years. No raises, many rounds of layoffs and recently acquired by a private equity.

I’m feeling burnt out and frankly more and more resentful because the responsibilities keep increasing but my salary and job title remains the same. I recently started looking for a job and received an offer letter with a 30% salary jump and what looks to be a good company on paper.. the downside… fully in office with the possibility of becoming hybrid pending performance. Commute is anything from 30 minutes to an hour worst case scenario.

I don’t know what to do. I have kids that are school age and a little 2 year old and it breaks my heart that I will not be as available as I am now.

What would you do?

I’m a qualified early childhood teacher who’s completely burnt out after years in the field. I love kids but the job has drained me physically and emotionally, and I’m ready to move into something desk-based. I don’t have any formal study option available to me right now (personal/visa reasons mean uni isn’t on the table for a few years), but I’m planning to go back to study down the track once that’s sorted. In the meantime, I’m open to doing a certification or course to build skills. I don’t have any prior desk-based work experience. A bit about me: I’m quite introverted, so I’d really struggle in a customer-facing role, and I also don’t want anything physical or labour intensive, so desk-based is really the goal. I know everyone says do what you enjoy but honestly, I genuinely don’t know what that is yet. All I know for sure is that I can’t keep doing work that’s this physically or emotionally draining. Ideally I want something with genuine room to grow. I’m not looking to stay entry-level forever, I want a path where my pay and responsibility can increase over time. Has anyone made a switch like this, from an unrelated field into an office job with no prior experience and no formal quals yet? What actually worked for you? Would appreciate any real advice, even if it’s not what I want to hear. I’m based in regional in NSW.

Hi! I currently work at a daycare full time. It’s not my dream job, but I have consistent pay, weekends off, and a consistent schedule with full benefits. I recently went to an interview for an internet sales associate at a local used car dealership. I’ll make a base pay (same as I make now) and then have an opportunity for commission. I got the job on the spot and was really excited. Then I learned someone I know worked there not too long ago and said management among other things were horrible. After that, I started doing some research and now I’m not really sure if it’s a good idea.

Is working at a used car dealership worth it? I know they can be shady. This place also doesn’t have any corporate presence. Just need some advice as to what my next move should be.

I am currently halfway through my BHSA. I started reading online about how other students/job candidates viewed the degree as a waste of time.

I work for one of the biggest hospital systems in my state and they are paying for part of my school, I am hoping for an internal transfer.

I have been a pharmacy technician for 15 years, I am nationally certified. I also have a certificate on medication history and billing reimbursement from the Pharmacy Technician Certification board.

I would love to work in the ER or help with behavioral/mental health or transplant services. Anyone have any opinions or insight?

Hello ! So I don't know if this is the good place to ask this but I am looking for advices because I am struggling at my work place and I need to decide what to do..

For context I moved last year to follow my partner so I had to leave my job in HR. The compagny wasn't the best but I had a great team and so I really enjoyed my job.

I left last June and had a hard time to find a new job until end of September so I had to use alot of my savings.

At the end of September, I found a assistant HR position which seemed interesting as remplacement for a lady who was pregnant. It is a short term contract that has been renewed 2 times since then and that ends August 30th.

The compagny has great ideas but the social climat is terrible... so terrible that in March my manager (head HR) left and is still not back. She apparently is in burnout...

I heard from the President who talked with her that she is not feeling well and doesn't want to come back.

So when my manager left I took on most of her work without a change in paychecks or status (the hardest being making paychecks) and now am working with a new manager that has even less experience in HR then me. She is also the daughter of the compagny owner. She is honnestly a terrible manager that doesn't control her anger issues. The decisions made everyday are horrible and when i tell her qbout it she doesn't care so my work seems pointless.

She also doesn't respect my work at all. I told her I had deadline for paychecks and she doesn't take it in consideration, she ask me to do things as if I'm her secretary, things she could do herself and would take her 0,5 seconds.

I finally told her I needed someone with more experience in HR to be there because we have many complicated subjects on the table but the answer is that they don't wanna hire a new HR director.

The next step is she want to keep me in the compagny because apparently my work is "great". But I honnestly don't know if I want to start a long term contract with them..

I really need a job because my partner is a student and I need to pay bills but I can't handle the stress. I feel super depressed as well and am honnestly exhausted.

Am also super scared that the grass isn't greener elsewhere..

So I technically have 3 choices :

- finish my short term contract and hope she wont tell unemployment that I refused a long term one so I can get unemployment until I find a new job.

- accept the contract and just continue working there, hoping things will change as she promised (easier paychecks, automatisation...)

- accept the contract but look for another job secretly.

What would you do ?

Sorry if my English isn't the best and thank you to whoever will read this !

Your instincts are extremely valuable. Keep them sharp. Companies go under, or merge, or shift focus. In a flash, a division is cut, or a formerly core group is closed. There are always cracks in the foundation and you are wise to envision a likely outcome.

I've just retired, but during the 50+ years I worked, I remained observant, read a lot, and learned from the older workers.

Same thing for changing careers when your current one may be wiped away or become menial. I've had 3 true professions, used one to build onto and transition to another, etc.

This might sound backwards but hear me out. I picked up freelance design clients about two years ago just to pad my income and stay sharp on projects I actually cared about. It worked. The money was good, the creative control was great, and I was building a portfolio that my day job would never let me build.

But now I'm interviewing for senior roles and something feels off. I can tell interviewers get uncomfortable when I mention the freelance work. One hiring manager basically asked me point blank whether I could commit to a single employer or if I'd always have one foot out the door. I didn't expect that question and fumbled it.

The weird part is the freelance work made me better at everything they claim to want. Managing client relationships, hitting deadlines without someone chasing me, owning outcomes start to finish. But some companies read it as a loyalty red flag rather than a competency signal.

I'm not sure whether to downplay it on my resume or lean into it and just accept that certain cultures won't be a fit. What I don't want is to quietly erase work I'm proud of just to seem more palatable in interviews.

Has anyone navigated this successfully, or did you eventually just go fully freelance because the full time path stopped making sense?

Hi, I am currently digital nomading for a half of a year but a few weeks ago I lost my remote job. Had no success of finding another remote job for last months. I have an offer in one of the nearest countries but the thing is this will be an office job 5/2 with tight schedule. So it means no more DN.

I understand that maybe it is okay to take this job as a temporary solution. But also I feel like I betrait myself because DNing and traveling are the only things that make me feel less depressed lol. I dreamed about this so many years and I feel like if I don't do this now then I completely lost my life time (I am in my early 30s).

I have some savings so basically I can live without a job for years but from finance perspective I feel that it is no good to just live on savings.

So tired of thinking about this last weeks. Through all my career (10+ years) I went to an office just for a couple of weeks and completely understand this is not me. Otherwise, working abroad in a big tech company might be an interesting experience but this fact doesn't motivate me at all.

So guys, what do you advice for me?

Hey everyone,

I could really use some outside perspective from people who've run a business or been in a similar spot, because I feel like I'm standing at a crossroads right now.

I'm a police officer in Greece. The job gives me a certain kind of security, sure, but financially it just barely gets me by. The salary covers a decent life, nothing more. And honestly, what worries me isn't even the present — it's the future. I see coworkers juggling second and third jobs just to make ends meet, and I don't want to end up like that once I have a family. I want to actually be able to give them a comfortable life, not just survive month to month.

A while back I got injured and I'll need surgery soon. Weirdly enough, the sick leave ended up giving me time to get involved in our family shop — furniture, beds, mattresses — that used to belong to my father. We reopened it, and it's running again. The problem is it's in a small town, so the market is pretty limited. Right now it basically brings in the equivalent of one extra salary a month, which is nice, don't get me wrong, but I can't really see it growing into something big if it's only relying on local customers.

So now I'm stuck weighing a bunch of different paths, and honestly I don't know which one makes the most sense:

Keep growing the shop the way it is now. Invest more into it — maybe even start manufacturing beds myself instead of just reselling. Start a completely different brand or business on the side. Or learn a trade — electrician, plumber, refrigeration tech — just to have a second, more reliable income stream.

My goal isn't just to bump up my income a little. I want to build something over the next few years that can actually generate real money, and ideally get to a point where I'm not constantly trading my time for cash. I'm not scared of grinding — if I have to work 12, 15 hour days for a few years to get there, I'll do it. What matters to me is building something that actually has long-term potential, not just busywork.

At the same time, I really don't want to make the wrong move — pour time and money into something that never had a real shot to begin with.

So if you were in my shoes, what would you do?

Would you double down on the existing shop? Move into actually producing your own products instead of reselling? Start something completely new from scratch? Or play it safer and pick up a trade on the side while staying in the police force?

I'd genuinely appreciate hearing from people who've built something from zero or have real experience in business.

Ijust hada horribe 2 minutes interview im so heartbroken cuz this was the final stage and i really wanted this job i know im not getting it. This is a bad sign right? think they cut it dhort cuz i was so nervous and i was stuttering a lot

Hi everyone, i completed my mandatory internship in January 2026 and was free to do anything up until july, i was supposed to enroll for degree this July 2026 but i have other better career opportunities that people get once in a lifetime, im considered to pass all stages but yet to receive an offer letter (it will take time since they do it in batches, according to previous candidates), so they can call me up for briefing and the commencement of this program anytime (within 3-6 months).

So if i were to enrol for my degree now while waiting for the letter would be a waste because i'll have to pay for my tuition fee by the end of july 2026 and eventually exit from my degree, so i deferred my degree to next february 2027 (the only next intake available) as its my only next best action so i can buy time while waiting for the offer letter.

So now, it appears like im taking a gap year. Which i did not foresee at all

so i clearly have too much time on my hands, and i did some travelling from jan-june, i dont want to waste the second half of my year. I have so much ideas and things that i want to try/do/experience.

but i live in a controlled narcissistic manipulative household, going out feels like a big thing and i have to get approval from my dad to do anything, i have drivers license but im not too confident driving by myself, i feel so trapped at home and it hurts to see myself wasting every time and opportunities i have. The idea of me going to work is not really favoured by my dad, i know i can insist and just do it, but it will take alot of energy and arguments and emotional draining sessions for this. Its so suffocating and stressful to live here. It feels like i cant do anything or accomplish anything for as long as im still in this house. But again, my dad is possessive and wants me to use my time by taking online courses at home (which i already did some but i want to go out and experience life)

I feel so stuck, ive been applying for internships and part time jobs but none have gotten back to me. Need some advice, where do i go about from here.

Hi everyone,

I'm a fresher working as a Software Engineer, and I'm struggling to understand whether what I'm experiencing is normal or if I should seriously consider leaving.

Some of the things I've experienced are:

• Very tight deadlines, with work assigned late in the day and an expectation to finish it the same day, often extending late into the night.
• Threats that if tasks aren't completed on time, I could lose my job.
• A workplace culture where people sometimes make disrespectful or unprofessional comments.
• I don't feel like there's much mentorship or technical guidance from senior developers.
• The office facilities are poor (for example, hygiene and restroom maintenance are not good), and the office is located in a basement, which makes the environment uncomfortable.
• As a woman, I sometimes feel uncomfortable with the way female employees are spoken to or treated. There are situations that make me feel the workplace isn't as professional or respectful as it should be.

I've tried focusing only on my work, but I'm finding it difficult to decide whether this is something I should tolerate as part of my first job or whether these are genuine red flags.

For people with more experience:

• Is this common in the IT industry?
• Would you stay and complete a year, or start preparing for a switch while continuing to work?

I'd really appreciate honest advice.

I have been working in environmental consulting for several years. I have been trusted with and continue to request more responsibilities as I move up in my career. Recently, I was assigned to lead a field program in a more challenging field setting. The work itself was within my experience, but the setting and logistics were more unfamiliar than previous projects I’ve done. I communicated to my manager that I was feeling overwhelmed and hoped for additional support. I've always had a good relationship with my manager, so I felt okay in being honest about how I was feeling.

I was able to complete my portion of the field program, but I was asked to extend and take over a colleague's shift. I declined because I was genuinely fatigued after and did not feel I could continue performing at my best. I have historically been very flexible with fieldwork, so recognizing and communicating that I was at my limit was difficult. Afterwards, my manager provided formal feedback that they had concerns about my ability to independently lead field programs. They also raised concerns about my willingness to support the team because I declined to extend my field shift.

What has been difficult is that I feel like one situation is now defining my abilities. I have never received formal feedback like this, and it has really shaken my confidence. I take a lot of pride in my work, so I’m questioning whether I can/should continue not only at this company, but in environmental consulting as a whole.

* Have other successful biologists received feedback like this? * Is this a sign that consulting/remote fieldwork may not be the right fit for me? * How do you know when to adapt and grow versus when to pursue a different type of environmental career?

I’d really appreciate perspectives from people who have been through similar moments in their careers.