By his name.

But I don’t like shrimp so I will get a chicken sandwich.

and we lose the internet

He said nothing.

He died from being brutally ripped apart by wind gusts.

There was once a man born with two dicks. Upon becoming an adult he realized that he only really needs one of them, and thought to himself: hey maybe I can sell my other dick for profit to someone who needs it.

The man wanders down the street and starts asking people around.

- “Hey sir, do you need a dick?”

- “Nah bro thanks, I already got one.”

He approaches a second guy and asks:

- “Hey man would you like to buy a dick?”

- “Nah man one dick is enough for me.”

At the end of the day the guy was convinced that no one was going to buy his extra dick. However, he spots a dude walking down the road on the other side, and decides to try his luck one last time.

- “Hey bro I have an extra dick, would you like to buy one?”

- “Oh my yes! Hell yes! Finally someone came along! Sir, kind sir, I was born dickless, and all my life I’ve been searching for someone with an extra dick that I can buy.”

- “Well I’ll be glad to sell it to you sir.”

- “That’s great! But would you mind if I can take a look at it first, just to be sure?”

- “Of course you can! There you go.”

The man unzips and shows him his extra dick.

The other guy, somewhat disappointed, raises his eyebrows slightly and says:

- “Um… why didn’t you tell me you were Asian?”

do you think we’d get clothes?

The poor photographer developed leukemia after just a few days, leading to his death two weeks later.

The spider died just minutes after the incident, it turned out its organs were already failing when it bit the photographer.

The scientists warned that exposure to radioactive substances is never a good thing, and it always ends in fatality.

It neither wears a tie.

Looking for some funny jokes don’t care how dark or funny they can be anything 😂

To do the washing up

Well, you first need to find out their last name. Then you add Doctor before that. So for example, if their last name was Smith you would call then Doctor Smith.

To eat the chicken.

Even more stupid and unfunny: why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the raccoon.

It can be hindi or english

You only need one if you plan on walking away to dive again

Two friends go on a hunting trip every year. Leave their wives and cell phones at home, just two bros in the wilderness, having a good time. A classic tradition, been doing it for over forty years.

This year they head out into the forest, set up camp, enjoy a night drinking by the fire, have a good long sleep.

In the morning, they go out hunting for moose. The forest is quiet, their luck seems to be bad, so they decide to split up.

After a while, one of them hears some rustling in the bushes, and he sees his friend come out calling "Don't shoot! I'm not a moose!". The first guy lifts his rifle real slow, aims carefully, and BLAM shoots his friend right in the neck.

He runs over to find his friend bleeding out and writhing around on the floor. He leans down and puts his arm around his friend, who, with his dying breath, asks, "Why? Why did you shoot me? I said I wasn't a moose". The shooter slaps himself on the forehead and says "Oh! I thought you said you *were* a moose!"