Hey everyone! I wanted to share an update since I’ve been following along and tracking everything for my first IUI.
Today was the big day, and everything went smoothly! Here’s how our numbers shook out for this cycle:

Sperm Count: We ended up with a 30 million post-wash count, which felt like a massive relief and a huge green light.

Follicles: At my CD10 check, I had three 15 mm follicles growing, and my clinic was really happy with how everything progressed.

The Procedure: Everything went well today, and my doctor even mentioned I had a great amount of cervical mucus, which is always nice reassurance that the timing and hormonal environment are right where they need to be.

Now comes the hardest part—the two-week wait! Sending so much baby dust to anyone else currently in their TWW or getting ready for their procedure.

How did you all keep yourselves sane during the two-week wait? Any favorite distractions?

I hope this is allowed...so sorry if it isn't plz feel free to remove.

ISO EST (tab)

Boston, MA

My wife and I have found a known donor and are feeling a little lost on the next steps! Before going down the path of hiring a lawyer, therapist, etc. we need to make sure his is fertile.

At what point do my wife and I need to start seeing a fertility specialist? Does it matter where he gets his fertility tests done (like should we just book directly at a labcorp)?
When would genetic testing come into play?

Assuming there are no issues medically, we plan to freeze his sperm for some time before TTC at a fertility clinic.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you! There’s so much to know and it can feel so overwhelming at first ❤️

Me and my partner are trying for our second baby. Our first baby we got really lucky and my wife listened to her body and we got pregnant first try. This go around she was using ovulation strips and the first try didn’t work so we ordered her a initio. This is her first month using the initio and we’re trying again with two straws. It looks like right now she’s in high fertility but not yet peak. When would be the best time to use the two straws?

I'm researching sperm preservation options for someone in SoCal before they start estrogen, and Give Legacy seems the most affordable. I've seen good reviews as well as some bad ones.

Does anyone have any experience with them? Are they worth it?

Edit: Meant to spell it as cryopreservation

My partner and I have been trying for two and a half years (unmedicated IUIs and IVIs). 2 chemical pregnancies and 2 ectopic pregnancies later we decided to try IVF only to be told by Kaiser that I exceed the BMI limit. It’s just WILD because any other method of conception would actively put me at high risk of another ectopic.

Does anyone have any experience successfully pushing back against these fatphobic policies?

We still have options (including my partners uterus- they are willing but not excited) and we are also at the tail end of getting approved as foster parents (not the same bc reunification is generally the goal, not long term parenthood.)

I’m running out of steam, y’all.

EDIT

I almost took this post down because of how shitty and mostly unhelpful a lot of these responses have been. Leaving up to offer information in case someone in the future needs it.

1. With a history of ectopic pregnancy, the risk of a recurrence is substantially higher without IVF. I have about a 25% chance of a recurrence with my history of 2 ectopic pregnancies (no tubal surgery). Using IVF would lower my risk of ectopic pregnancy to 2% (6.2% with a history of tubal surgeries). Most ectopic pregnancies happen in the tubes and with IVF, the tubes are circumnavigated, so it is much safer. IVF does not inherently increase the risk of ectopic, the increased risk you hear about has more to do with the reasons people seek out IVF (age, difficulty conceiving, etc.)

2. Have you heard that BMI is bogus? And that BMI alone is not a good predictor of surgical risk or health in general?

3. Have yall ever heard of informed consent?!?! Anytime you access healthcare you take on the risk of a complication. Im shocked that I have to say this here but people should be allowed to take reasonable risks with informed consent if they so choose. People should have access to reproductive health autonomy. WTF why am I saying that to so many y’all?? People should not be denied the dignity of choice based on size.

I appreciate those of you who showed up with compassion and those who offered your relevant experiences and insight. My fertility journey has been painfully hard and anyone who offered a kind or helpful word, I appreciate you.

Hello! My wife and I are hoping to start the IUI or IVF process in late 2027 or early 2028. Is it too soon for us to go to the fertility clinic for a consultation and to see what first steps might be for us? Or is checking in with my gynecologist enough for now?

Thank you!!!💓

My partner and I are a same-sex couple hoping to grow our family. We had originally really wanted to use a known donor and looked at several different options, but they all fell through for different reasons. Eventually we decided to use a sperm bank instead.

We spent a huge amount of time researching donors across multiple sperm banks, looking at profiles, reading through medical histories, and trying to make the most informed choice possible.

Because of our own personal and family histories, there were a few things we specifically wanted to avoid. We both have diagnosed ADHD and my partner has hearing loss in her family, so we made sure to choose a donor who did not report ADHD or hearing loss.

After a lot of research, we finally chose a donor and ordered two vials (over $5000). The vials arrived at our clinic, and the money came out of our account. The very next day (literally ONE day after the vials arrived) we were told there had been a medical update - that the donor has diagnosed ADHD AND hearing loss.

We got in touch with our fertility clinic immediately to ask whether the vials could be returned or exchanged, but we have not heard back yet.

We both live happy, successful, and fulfilling lives with ADHD. But we understand firsthand that living with ADHD can come with real challenges and felt that, where we had a choice, it was fair to try not to increase that likelihood. We also fully understand that genetics are complicated and that there are no guarantees.

Wondering if anyone has dealt with something similar? Were you able to get a refund or exchange the vials after receiving a significant medical update?

Looking for advice! My wife (32) and I (33) were all set to try IUI #3 in two weeks after switching to a new clinic and taking a few months break. We shipped the sperm earlier this month and are feeling ready to try again.

But now, I received some news at work that made my job feel less secure, so I’m applying to new companies.

We’re trying to decide if we should skip this cycle or stop trying to get pregnant until I get a new job. Or even wait a few months to get settled into something new since I’m the one carrying.

Have any of you all started a new job pregnant or gotten pregnant early on in the job? Would love to hear some of your experiences!

My wife (36F) and I (36F) had our first IUI on July 12 using donor sperm (she’s the one who had the procedure). She was on letrozole only—no trigger shot.

Our clinic scheduled her beta blood test for July 30, which feels kind of late to us. By then she’d likely already have gotten her period (around July 27–28) if it didn’t work.

We’re trying to decide whether to take a home pregnancy test before the blood test. Since there was no trigger shot, I’m assuming we don’t have to worry about a false positive from medication, but my wife is still nervous about getting a false positive or an unclear result and is leaning toward waiting for the blood test. I’d rather test at home first, but she’s open to talking it through.

For those who didn’t use a trigger shot, did you test before your beta? If so, what day did you test, and did you find it helpful or did it just create more anxiety? Would you recommend waiting, or testing at home first?

One thing I hear over and over is how isolating parenting can feel when you don’t know many families like your own. I’d love to hear your experiences. What actually helped you feel connected?

Was it another family?
An online group?
A local event?
School?
Something completely unexpected?

I’d love to hear your stories because I think they might help someone else reading this too 🥰

IUI, IVF, egg freezing, embryo freezing, sperm freezing, donor sperm, legal paperwork, etc… I’m curious where you’re at!

For me, 6 rounds of ER- currently on the 6th. US$66K 🤯

includes 4 rounds of fertilisation, 3 vials of donor sperm, testing of 9 embryos, consult, supplements, drugs like Omni (tip: get from Costco, don’t pay for it again!!)

“Outcome”

30 eggs frozen - won’t fertilise yet as it’s more expensive to do that than a full round at a cheaper clinic…

4 day 3 embryos frozen - froze due to poor results in a previous round, doc suggested to keep them frozen first as I’m doing another round

4 euploids.

No transfer or pregnancy or live birth yet.

Not sure about this coming round yet, still in the process. Hoping for another 4-6 euploids and I’m done banking it for hopes of 2 kids!

Has anyone rented a dry shipping container to transport frozen sperm from one clinic to another? What was your experience like? The courier services are so expensive. We'd just need to bring it from the clinic where our donor lives to the clinic where we're doing IVF in another city. It's a three hour drive.

My husband and I did our first IUI on July 13.
I had two mature follicles 24 and 25.
Now in the 2 week wait to test.
None of it feels real!
Aside from some cramps when I take my progesterone in the evening I feel exactly the same as ever. I know that’s normal but it’s so weird to think that I could be pregnant or not and there’s no signal my body is giving me?
Trying to occupy myself but the wait is driving me crazy!

The Los Angeles Times is reporting an article about the affordability of fertility treatment. We want to know: How are people who didn’t qualify for employer-sponsored insurance paying for IVF?

We are interested in hearing from women and couples about why you chose the financial and treatment path you did. Or are you delaying treatment or looking for a new job to qualify for insurance?

If you’d like to share your story, please email a couple sentences to [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]). Please describe your situation, including details about your diagnosis, family-building journey, insurance status and decision to pursue or delay treatment. Also, please let us know how you identify yourself (example: a 35-year-old Black woman).

You must be comfortable sharing your name and reside in the Los Angeles area (Los Angeles, Orange, Riverside, San Bernardino and Ventura counties). A reporter will reach out about next steps, which might include scheduling a phone interview. All information that is eventually included in the article will be fact-checked for accuracy before publication.

We look forward to hearing from you. Feel free to share this query with others and/or reply in this thread if you have any questions or concerns. Thank you.

This project is supported by the USC Annenberg Center for Health Journalism.

Myself (32f) and my partner (32f) did two rounds of unmedicated/no trigger shot IUI using frozen donor sperm. We went into it knowing the stats, but not really believing them because I am supposedly healthy (partner not interested in being pregnant). Therefore, we totally expected it to work. And my brain tends to function like that, I kind of block out the negative and focus on hope and optimism. We bought three straws so the plan in our head was try 3 times and then re-evaluate and I suppose we were thinking we could do it again 3rd time straight after the 2nd. However, I don't know if anyone else relates to our delusion because we never worked out a financial plan because we were so hopeful. The problem is now having revised our budget following 2nd failed IUI, we realise we won't be able to afford another until January at the earliest. Part of the reason for this is my sister's wedding (she's getting married in an extravagant five star venue) and my parents and sister have insisted that I stay with them in the main venue rather than staying in the cheaper nearby hotel with all the other guests. Well the cost of staying in this place for one night is basically the cost of that elusive 3rd IUI.... Neverminding my sister's wedding, this whole process has made me wonder about this whole IUI thing and whether to use the fertility drugs or to jump to natural cycle IVF? And of course it has also made me feel like maybe we will never have children because we can't afford to keep going endlessly... this is uncertainty is so cruel. I truly believe it is the most messed up game of lotto you can play

My wife and I did our first ICI attempt with one straw of MOT10 frozen sperm and it failed. We knew that was the likely outcome and it’s okay. Taking a month off before trying again, but I was wondering if it would be best to use two straws of the lower motility next time or one straw of higher motility? We know IVF has the highest odds and that will become our discussion if we end this year with no pregnancy, but for now we’re sticking with ICI.

My wife and I are about to do our first IUI this month, and I'm just looking for some advice, encouragement, or stories from others who've been through it.

We're a lesbian couple, and my wife will be carrying. She's 37 years old, and this cycle is an unmedicated IUI.

So far, everything has looked okay:

-She has an AMH of 16.3 and 18 follicles.
-She ovulates regularly every month.
-We've completed all the genetic testing
-chose a sperm donor with high MOT
-Her comprehensive screening, bloodwork, and everything else have come back normal.

The only potential concern is that her HSG suggested one fallopian tube might be blocked, but they couldn't say for certain. They don't think it's from damage, scarring, or any underlying condition. just that she may have been born that way.

She's also been doing everything she can to prepare: no alcohol, low caffeine, taking prenatal vitamins, vitamin D, and baby aspirin, eating a balanced, iron-rich diet, plus a Brazil nut and half a cup of pomegranate juice each day (we know some of that isn’t exactly science based lol but we’re trying!)

Our clinic has her testing for ovulation every morning, and she's currently on cycle day 12.

Lots of women close to me have struggled with fertility and miscarriages and I am anxious about my partner having to go through anything difficult. I hope it works out.

I know there's only so much we can control, but we're definitely feeling excited and anxious at the same time. I'd love to hear from anyone who had a similar situation, especially if you were around her age or had one suspected blocked tube. Any advice or words of encouragement or even tips like eating a Brazil nut would mean a lot.

Thanks so much ❤️