r/okbuddycinephile 7h ago

A historically accurate adaptation of 'The Odyssey'

Post image
4.4k Upvotes

2.0k comments sorted by

View all comments

692

u/Garthmetro 7h ago

Fascinated to see the historically accurate giant man eating Cyclops. Or witches. Or sea monsters

203

u/Odd-Homework-3582 6h ago

As long as they’re played by WASPs it is accurate

61

u/absolutely_not_spock 6h ago

Sydney will play the sirens…

37

u/oofty_goofty_ cape kino make me🤑🤑🤑 5h ago

Fully nude, with extra jiggle physics added.

There will also be scenes about how women need to be more modest and stop being whores

10

u/Wild-Lychee-3312 4h ago

I will only accept this if everyone is fully nude. Everyone. The entire cast.

Also I demand extra jiggle physics added for Scylla and Charybdis.

3

u/eukomos 2h ago

That's fine, because the Sirens in the actual Odyssey have the heads of women and the bodies of birds, so we can have all the naked birds on screen we like and not even have to spend money on jiggle physics.

2

u/vshredd 2h ago

Alright I'm listening.

2

u/MarzipanHausboot 5h ago

Have you seen Apocalypto? Your accusation is backwards. Gibson didnt cast a single WASP. Nolan casts from a San Francisco Busstop.

2

u/HourNo7028 5h ago

Yes, none of those hairy Mediterranean types! /s

1

u/Financial-Leader3475 2h ago

Please cast all the Mediterranean types for The Odyssey. Unironically.

2

u/Apprehensive-Roll909 6h ago

by what ?

25

u/EvilAbacus 6h ago

WASP stands for White, Anglo-Saxon Protestant.

2

u/Apprehensive-Roll909 6h ago

bro there's an acronym for that lol, the more you know

12

u/Ok_Conclusion_6324 Uwe Boll 6h ago

C. R. A. C. K. E. R.

8

u/Culinaryboner 6h ago

Funny it’s not known. When I was a kid it came up every political election. Every president was a WASP except Kennedy

4

u/Brave_Lengthiness_72 5h ago

It used to be very important in American society, in the late 19th century and early 20th. There were WASP societies, and anti immigrant sentiment was largely based around the idea of keeping the US as WASP as possible.

3

u/EvilAbacus 6h ago

It's who the really white consider actually white

2

u/SuckingOnChileanDogs 5h ago

It is an incredibly common acronym

1

u/ozaffer 6h ago

It's pretty common, learned about it from early family guy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IJ6DzuNeG8

1

u/curiousorange76 3h ago

Whitehouse Accomodating Sexual Predator

1

u/johnnyhandbags 5h ago

That worked for Braveheart

1

u/snakebight 5h ago

Wet Ass Spussy?

1

u/liccman 1h ago

I mean Nolan’s one is played by WASPs 😭

49

u/Famous-Midnight-5634 6h ago

Not that hard to pull off for the cyclops. Though I doubt he'd reprise the role

4

u/wethepeople1977 3h ago

Funny that there was no screaming about historical accuracy when this came out.

2

u/messick 1h ago

The Cohens made it clear they had never even read The Odyssey. They used what they thought the Odyssey was about and used that as the structure.

Also, straight white dudes were still enough on top that they didn't have to go looking for things to get mad about because the world hadn't yet showed them their mediocracy.

1

u/Famous-Midnight-5634 2h ago

uj/ is it? It’s so far removed, stylistically, with no trappings of historically-accurate context, that there couldn’t be any confusion that it was an homage/reinterpretation. Then again, if it was released now, maybe we would see some idiotic pushback.

3

u/PoetMaterial3519 4h ago

Such a good film!!

3

u/BigD_277 3h ago

Best adaptation so far! Homer is listed as first writer on IMDb.

14

u/BoardsofCanada3 6h ago

All played by Musk, who's tweaking his flabby rits off on ket

10

u/Jetsam5 DonCheadleAMA 6h ago

Honestly my biggest problem with the Nolan Odyssey was how grounded the monsters were. The cyclops never spoke, Scylla was barely seen, and the sirens weren't seen at all.

I honestly can't imagine what a "historically accurate" version would look like

3

u/SuckingOnChileanDogs 5h ago

Yes he did, that's the point, and yes they were.

7

u/Jetsam5 DonCheadleAMA 5h ago edited 5h ago

Yeah I know that's the point. I understand it was intentional, I dislike the intentional choices they made.

I'm not under the impression they just accidentally cut all that from the film

3

u/GFYAD 2h ago

Your other two points were still factually wrong though.

The cyclops did speak and the sirens were shown. Both happened briefly but were still there.

3

u/toyification_girl 5h ago

I mean all jokes aside Mel Gibson does produce and direct some bangers of movies. He would do a good job if he was passionate about it. I think it would cost a lot more than 100 million though lol

8

u/Candid_Ninja_5658 5h ago

-3

u/UncoolSlicedBread 3h ago

Ah, good ole Whataboutism.

4

u/sippingonginnjews 3h ago

That’s not what that word means friend

-2

u/UncoolSlicedBread 3h ago

It is, it’s an exaggeration whataboutism.

2

u/givenupbee 4h ago

Hisotrically accurate mitological story. You cannot make this shit up.

2

u/Numeno230n 3h ago

It will literally be a guy taking a boat trip home, with some family drama.

4

u/waves_away 6h ago

Source accurate?

2

u/Garthmetro 6h ago

Let’s not mince our words here. Racially accurate is what you meant to say

6

u/the_sneaky_one123 5h ago

Racially accurate but all white anglo-saxons. No Greek people at all lol.

3

u/sippingonginnjews 4h ago

Mel Gibson made Apocalypto

2

u/loricomments 4h ago

What does that even mean?

1

u/UncoolSlicedBread 3h ago

Nolan created his interpretation of the source. I hope this helps.

3

u/paradox-preacher 5h ago

Btw. If it's mythology about certain timeframe in history. They you portray that accurately... It's not like, "loch ness" is a monster, ok now let's do a movie about the myth of a monster sighting in a certain time, but portray everything about that time wrong...

2

u/GuterJudas 6h ago

Right?
Same with egyptian mythology, who cares if a single thing in there looks egyptian.
Might also shoot it in germany, the climate is way better than all this stupid sand and heat.
Also Pyramids are just buildings, can just take a church instead.

4

u/cheeze2005 6h ago

You’re not gonna believe this but they shoot movies based on all sorts of places from California 

-2

u/GuterJudas 5h ago

You don‘t say!!! Do they even like…. alter the filmed stuff with computereffects????

1

u/Financial-Leader3475 6h ago

We need WASPs playing Egyptians and Greeks. That’s the only way!

2

u/Garthmetro 6h ago

It’s a movie. Not a history lesson. It’s for entertainment. If movies are where you intend to learn history, you will come up very short.

3

u/Financial-Leader3475 6h ago

Sydney Sweeney playing Pocahontas next!

1

u/_The2ndComing 3h ago

Wild to use Pocahontas as a rebuttal when her most famous media depiction is a total white washing story to begin with.

1

u/Financial-Leader3475 2h ago

So is Nolan’s Odyssey

4

u/LizLemonOfTroy 5h ago

People do get their impressions of history from film and television. That's why medievalists have spent decades pushing back against the myth that medieval peasants ate dung all day and never bathed. And it's not like the thousands of people who see The Odyssey are all going to go diving into history textbooks or the original text afterwards to correct any misperceptions.

It's silly to just say it's entertainment and therefore cannot be criticised for historical accuracy. There's no reason why something cannot be entertaining and accurate simultaneously.

Braveheart is a fun film but it's a fucking abysmal depiction of Scottish history and I'll go to my grave making fun of that.

0

u/VincentClement1 4h ago

When you get past the generic description of a past event, documented or reported history is largely subjective. Historically accurate from which point of view?

2

u/LizLemonOfTroy 4h ago

Of course, that's what historiography is for - to compare and debate based on available evidence.

But just because we don't have unanimous agreement on every aspect of a period of history doesn't mean you shouldn't even try, even based on the majority view.

We don't even have 100% agreement on all aspects of the Second World War, but you'd probably still notice if the Americans were driving Tesla Cybertrucks on Omaha Beach.

1

u/cheeze2005 3h ago

What’s the cybertruck in this analogy?

1

u/Financial-Leader3475 2h ago

White anglo-saxons playing Ancient Greeks.

1

u/VincentClement1 5h ago

I mean, even documentaries are entertainment.

1

u/GuterJudas 4h ago

EXACTLY.
And what are the best ingredients for an authentic and believable story?

1

u/Garthmetro 4h ago

White actors?

1

u/GuterJudas 4h ago

I thought of little people but that‘s also cool.

2

u/Adventurous_Sun3512 4h ago

That part is the mythology. You're old enough to understand the difference between the mythological parts vs historical parts.

1

u/eukomos 2h ago

What exact parts of the Odyssey do you think are historical, and what's your evidence for that? I think the best we've got are some bronze age palace foundation remnants at Sparta, which we could imagine are the setting for the scenes of Telemachus visiting Helen and Menelaus.

1

u/lynypixie 6h ago

Speaking Ancient Greek.

2

u/sippingonginnjews 4h ago

They speak Aramaic in Passion and Mayan in Apocalypto so idk why Greek would be difficult to pull off

1

u/Repulsive_Barnacle92 6h ago

with no subtitles, as god intended it

1

u/Notsurehowtoreact 4h ago

I'm fascinated to see them pull off all these "painstakingly accurate" depictions with only a $100m budget. 

We don't even have to talk about mythical creatures, you're gonna make period accurate ships, armor, weapons, and shit and you don't think that's gonna be incredibly expensive?

1

u/Ok_Astronomer_8667 4h ago

Athena can be historically accurate if she’s a white woman im attracted to

1

u/theFamooos 4h ago

He will do a historically accurate Harry Potter next

1

u/Wonderful_Tip_5577 4h ago

I’m actually not opposed to them creating a “historically accurate” odessy, as long as Zach galifanakis plays the lead. 

1

u/puppyenemy 4h ago

I dont like this argument because a work of fiction can be very historically grounded but still have fantasy. Like Robert Eggers' films, where he creates accurate outfits down to the very threads, and everything that is blurry in the background has to be period accurate too, but they're still about witches, or mermaids, or something (I don't know, I don't watch movies). I would very much be down with a period accurate Beowulf for example (if I'd ever watch a movie).

1

u/striderspin123 4h ago

it is the same when people have fantasy tv shows and then point out something that has no logic and people like you come out to say it is a fantasy show.

logic still exists even in world with magic.

1

u/SinisterCheese 4h ago

You silly... Historically accurate means that they are blue eyed and blond haired vikings who speak American English, have dehydrated bodies to show off their gymbro muscles and only eat meat, and don't do anything that isn't manly and hetero... like show emotions other than blind rage and patriotism.

1

u/SoggyPerformer7602 4h ago

Don't forget the swans.

1

u/cwningen95 Cats 3h ago

I hope they include Helen's mum banging a swan then laying an egg

1

u/Warm-Professional494 3h ago

Are they going to have there little sex boy with them? Having homosexual between men and boy relationships was 100% with Greeks at this time.

1

u/ManofManyHills 2h ago

The Laestrygonians are apparently based on an ancient norwegian people that occupied Sicily.

So just get Erling Haaland, Hafthor Bjornsen and a bunch of other viking looking mofos and call it good.

1

u/phak0h 6h ago

Was Zeus and Ganymede in the Odyssey?

1

u/WintersDoomsday 6h ago

What do you mean? Are you also telling me the Bible isn't real either now?