My husband (30M) and I (31F) booked a venue for our baby shower in late September (due November). For context, I’m Hispanic and he’s white (Italian), and this is our first big party because we eloped and didn’t want a big wedding. For our elopement we did a small intimate gathering with a total 14 people including ourselves. My side of the family (the ones not invited) were butthurt because they weren’t invited. They saw my sister and my 2 best friend’s stories and automatically assumed we threw a party. So, now we decided to actually do a bigger party for the baby shower.

The venue fee $3,500 (we’re in NJ btw) cover chairs, coolers, ice, buffet and bar area. So no food or servers or decorations included. We’re looking at a total of $10k with food, decoration and no alcoholic drinks.

I called my mom after we left a deposit and let her know we booked the venue and our date is set. When I told her the price she told me I was ridiculous and that it was too expensive. My sister then called me later in the day to say the same and I told her it’s non refundable, so to not comment. My mom and sister are on the other line asking me all these questions about the time, saying that 6pm -11pm time is too early, that we should start at 7pm and stay till midnight bc we’re Hispanic and we like to party. They also think not having alcohol is whack. (We could extend for another hour for $500, which we’re assuming we’d likely do). While on this call, I noticed my sister was active in the spreadsheet I shared with my guest list. I forgot I added a new tab tallying up the total costs of food, decor, everything. So I know they were snooping when they called us. I removed her access immediately but I’m sure they saw how much we were planning on paying for everything.

Another point I should mention is that my husband is 3 years sober now. I’m not a big drinker (never really been), so I’m ok with the no alcohol. I know there’s a huge stereotype for Hispanics drinking and being reckless, and well I do have some family like that. I wanted to avoid that because it’s a baby shower with families. I know my side of the family will complain, so I’m very conflicted. My husband says we can pay for a bartender and let them bring drinks (the place is BYOB), but I hate that I’m in this position where my family makes us feel bad for spending so much money on this party and then trying to tell us to change around the time because “Hispanics are always late” and “we like to drink”. However, his side of the family is punctual and they probably won’t be staying that late, while my family is the type to party all night.

I do want to have games with alcoholic drinks but that’s about it for the guests. I personally don’t like staying up too late and I’ll be super pregnant, I doubt I’ll want to stay up hosting either.

I started crying and my husband says let’s take the $1k loss on the deposit for this venue, pick a cheaper spot that’s closer, includes food or some other service.

I don’t know what to do. This is so stressful at this point. I don’t even want to do a baby shower anymore. It’s not fun. I don’t want added stress because I’m 24 weeks pregnant. Any advice is welcome.

I’m working on thank you notes for my baby shower. There is one friend who I’m not sure I should include in my list of recipients.

Context: I had considered this friend one of my closer in-town friends—she was one of the first people I shared my pregnancy with—and was ecstatic when she was one of the first to RSVP yes to our couple’s baby shower. The invites were sent well in advance to make sure guests were likely free and had plenty of time to make arrangements. Well, a week before the shower, this one friend texts me to say that her plans changed and she would be out of town and unable to come after all. I was really surprised and disappointed. She didn’t give any details to explain or justify the sudden change in plans and I can’t help but assume that she just decided she’d rather go on a weekend trip than honor her commitment to my shower. It made me feel so small and unimportant and like I had misjudged our friendship. I showed up for her when she had her baby shower and gave her a thoughtful gift. in the end, not only did she bail on my shower, but she didn’t send a gift either. It‘s normal for people who can’t attend an event to not send a gift, though many still do, but I have to assume she was initially planning to bring a gift before deciding not to come.

Anyway, about a week or two after the shower she texted me that she wanted to meet up and give me a small gift. I’ll admit I was still pretty hurt and not too keen on getting together but decided to suck it up and meet up. It was fine, we had lunch and she gave me a cute little stuffed animal. In fact, it was the same one I had gifted her. I had gifted her the stuffy as a little extra detail on top of several items from her registry. She said they loved the one I gave them so much that she wanted me to have one too. It was impossible for her to know this, but it was also the third of the same exact stuffy I had gotten as a gift.

I feel like she thinks she’s off the hook and fulfilled her friendly obligation, but I truly feel like the effort was an afterthought. Maybe I’m too sensitive, but I was hurt.

Anyway, do I still owe this friend a thank you note? I thanked her in person obviously when she gave me the gift, but do I owe her more than that? Am I being too sensitive?

Hi everyone! I'm currently pregnant with a baby girl. My husband and I are planning on doing a baby shower since the last kid for either of us was years ago and neither of us has any baby stuff anymore, plus the more important part to me, I want to celebrate our baby with our family. I truly couldn't care less about gifts. Just know some people feel weird about having baby showers for consecutive kids.

Anyways, we have a pretty specific theme in mind. Barbie in the Twelve Dancing Princesses. And while I know ballet is a much simpler theme, that movie means A TON to me, so we're really trying to do the Twelve Dancing Princesses theme.

I have very vague ideas but because it's so specific Pinterest doesn't have very many ideas that aren't a birthday party or just Barbie themed, which isn't what I'm going for.

If anyone has any ideas, please send them my way! I'd very much appreciate it!

Hola, vivo en lima-Perú un mi baby shower será en un mes, acá se acostumbra a contratar una animadora en el baby shower pero en verdad no me gustaría contratar animadora ya que no me gusta mucho, yo haré un brunch a las 10:30 am hasta las 2:pm aprox., creen que es necesario una animadora o tienen ideas de un par de actividades sencillas que se puedan realizar sin necesidad de tener a una persona encargada de animar?

My family loves classic cars and they are having their first son. I really wanted to gift them something classic car related. Even a fun arrangement. Any suggestions? Perhaps some ideas you have personally seen ?

Hi everyone!

I am 28 weeks pregnant today and normally wear a 40N bra. I am struggling to find a dress to wear to my baby shower in September. I live in the Midwest, Illinois, to be specific. It will still be quite warm. While my baby shower is indoors, I do not do well in the heat; I never have.

I have found a few cute dresses on Bloomchic that I know would fit; however, they are what I would wear in the cooler months. I do not like the typical neckline and sleeve style they usually reserve for us plus-sized women.

Does anyone have any other ideas of where I can look? I have looked on Amazon and Shein, and I am not finding much that I like. I do not want to spend more than $75, but I will go a little over if I absolutely have to. I am also considering a nice top that will show off my belly and some bottoms. I originally had a black top that was sheer in the belly area and a skirt but it did not quite cover my breasts.

I like things sparkly and am having a boy! My baby shower is Harry Potter themed.⚡️

All ideas are appreciated, thank you!

Hi everyone! I’m looking at Loveys /security blankets for a newborn/baby gift and I really have my heart set on one of those crochet / amigurumi ones, but I can’t decide between these two types. Both feature a crochet animal head & arms, with either a crochet blanket body (first pic - Option 1) or a muslin/cotton body (second pic - Option 2).

I love that style because it feels more heirloom and like a keepsake. Can y’all please help me decide? Which would you prefer? Many thanks!

Hey everyone,

I am planning a baby shower for my sister and am looking for guidance on addressing the invites (sending in the mail)

My sister is a Doctor and many of her invitees are her friends from residency. Most are female but she has several males in the group included as well. My sister has specifically requested nothing overly formal - no “Mr & Mrs”

However my question is about the Dr. titles. What are your recommendation on the envelopes? Families/souses and kids are invited to the shower so the invite would be to the Family.

Is “Dr. Johnson & Family” appropriate? Should it be “Dr. Jane Johnson & Family” instead? Is the Dr. too formal, or is it rude not to include that title? (Some of her friends’ spouses are also physicians as well, so I feel like first name helpful but worry that’s too formal?) She doesn’t know all of the spouses as well (some, but not all) so I wasn’t sure if they should just be “The Johnson Family” - is that better?

Thanks for your input!

I just have to share this for a good laugh and to see if anyone else experienced this.

I have had three dreams now where I am at my baby shower and everyone is gifting me….

- clothes (we have no clothes on the registry since his first year wardrobe is already entirely hand me downs from church friends)

- ugly, cheap choking, hazard toys (like dice / DnD accessories, Lego sets for teenagers )

- weird things that weren’t on the registry that are not for babies (in my dream it’s my husbands friends bringing DnD costume Jewelry or his family giving the baby bath bombs or cheap scented lotions, kitchen stuff that we already have?!)

- no diapers / wipes / cash / gift cards / nothing we actually need

it’s weird I know 😂

im definitely having some baby shower anxiety but not around gifts, more around gathering my dysfunctional family together.

anyone else have these reoccurring nightmares?!

Delete if not allowed. Hi all.... so I will admit im horrible iv been super procrastinating. And my boyfriends sister in laws baby shower is tomorrow. I have NO IDEA what the heck to get her. Their amazon list is wiped. But I really wanna get something for baby but also something that mom just needs. I have never had a baby personally so I have no idea what to get her. Taking all advice. Id like to stay under $50 - $75 for a gift. (P.S I dont have to get diapers at all because the men are doing a diapers themed party in the basement while us girls do all the baby shower stuff upstairs.) Lol

Single mom of two, expecting baby #3. 💛

I’m currently unemployed and doing my best to get by while I look for work. If anyone would like to help, here’s my baby registry. Every bit of support is appreciated.

https://www.amazon.com/baby-reg/sierra-h-november-2026-houston/1HUC560ZCPBPB

The shower is an afternoon tea at a quaint little middle of nowhere village Pub.

She is not finding out the gender of her baby! (I know mine is a boy).

Feel like I cant wear white/nude/pink/blue? Should i hide the bump with something floaty (its pretty big)? Are patterns with blue/pink ok?

Would most mums to be care??

Suggestions?
Thanks.

I’m scheduled to have a C section on July 31st. This will be my second child and I feel like I’m going to have to go with the flow of things (son will be turning 3 a couple weeks after baby is born). With that being said, there are several events coming up that I can’t miss. My sister’s wedding on Sept 5, her bridal shower a couple weeks before, and my son’s birthday the week before. For my son’s birthday and sister’s bridal shower, we decided to host. That way, we can have the baby at home and it’s more comfortable for me. The wedding will be 1.5 hours away and we’d have to stay at a hotel. I think it’ll be okay because I have family to help me but I’m just really worried it’s going to be chaotic. And I’m also worried about exposing a newborn to illnesses. We won’t have anyone other than me, my husband and our parents interact with the baby. But I just am curious to see if anyone had similar experiences.

Hi all, pregnant and recently laid off from my job. Which means we’re trying to prep for baby on a very tight budget. And baby shower planning has started.

Questions here:
Anyone ever hosted a budget baby shower at a brewery? What did you pay for? (1st round only, food only?)

Anyone also decide to forgo a baby shower but still formally share a registry? I’m thinking like pregnancy announcement with registry. Obviously being on a budget we need as much support as we can get. But curious how this would be received.

Thanks!

Am I being old fashioned? I was invited to a baby shower and the mother to be did not open her presents. We walked in and were seated at a table, served a very nice lunch at a very nice restaurant. She walked around to greet everyone and then it was over! Is opening shower gifts not something young women do anymore?

First time parent here, I’ll be due on October and we’re planning to do baby shower around August or September.
How does baby shower works?
My mother in law wants to do it with her family, more on just family. And I have friends who wants to do it for me as well.
Religion conflicts, my MIL is devoted Catholic and me and my husband are not( different religion actually)
And my friends who wants to do it is same religion as me, and I just don’t want them to feel awkward when one person wants to do this, and that , that’s gonna make each other uncomfortable.
My MIL wants to do it in the restaurant (she owns a taco shop)
And my friends wants to do it in a clubhouse.

What am I supposed to do? I don’t want to hurt anybody’s feelings.
Or am I just overthinking?