r/WorkReform • u/zzill6 đ¤ Join A Union • 1d ago
đ¸ Raise Our Wages Here's a lesson about Capitalism.
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u/JeffSilverwilt 1d ago
Don't forget you also own her housing. Get your rent.
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u/UltimateGammer 1d ago
She ain't living off air either, she best pay up for those 3 meals a day.
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u/Status_Tiger_6210 2h ago
And as long as she's paying you for her rent and food and other necessities, you might as well pay her in company scrip instead of cash just to keep things simple.
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u/thinkB4WeSpeak đˇ Good Union Jobs For All 1d ago
Keep her in a debt trap so she's always working and can't find another job or unionize
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u/inspectoroverthemine 23h ago
Careful though- she knows where you sleep, and probably gets a piece of the estate.
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u/hansn 1d ago
For reference, 52/2=26. So 26:1 (or arguably, 10:1). The typical CEO to employee pay for major US companies is 281:1.
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u/Durpulous 23h ago
Wow the ROI on this lemonade stand is terrible and I think I see why. The employee is making $2 which is way above her market value.
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u/DestinTheLion 1d ago
Thatâs not entirely fair, sheâs a small business owner. Â So 26:1 sounds about right.
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u/wearing_moist_socks 1d ago
Uh, she made 2 bucks!
Well on her way to being a trillionaire!
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u/dweet 1d ago
Itâs obvious that any of her financial woes are all because of immigration.
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u/SilverTraveler âď¸ Prison For Union Busters 1d ago
She should probably pull herself up by her bootstraps
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u/juanonymouss 1d ago
If she only stopped buying fancy gumballs and whirly toys she wouldnât be struggling financially
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u/MonkeySling 1d ago
Now she only has to make another 5 to afford the rent for the house she lives in.
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u/MortaleWombat 17h ago
If my math is correct, it should only take a trillion or so more days. Not bad
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u/Langstarr 1d ago
The episode "The Block is Hot" from The Boondocks does a fairly fantastic job of describing exactly this
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u/Loud-Ad-2280 âď¸ Tax The Billionaires 1d ago
The âriskâ they took is that if they fail theyâll have to get a job instead of exploiting people⌠The Horror!!!!
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u/UltimateGammer 1d ago
Follow up: daughter formed a union and threatened to report daddy to CPS for child labour unless the $52 is given back.
Daddy folded like the spineless sack of shit he is.
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u/NoHorseNoMustache 1d ago
If it's in the US: Daughter formed a union and threatened to report daddy to CPS, daddy fired daughter and brought in scabs who will work for a dollar a day. Daddy HATES unions and will fold the whole company before giving into those low class laborers. Daddy then puts apology note on lemonade stand about how the business is closed because nobody wants to work these days.
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u/Roudyno âď¸ Tax The Billionaires 1d ago
Daddy also hired the Pinkerton Detective Agency to infiltrate their union and destroy it from within. the amount of money spent doing this is far greater than the amount it would have cost to just pay the daughter a fair wage.
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u/NoHorseNoMustache 1d ago
But paying a fair wage isn't fair to daddy, he took the risk!
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u/Sunstorm84 17h ago
What would the shareholders think of the increased permanent liability?
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u/NoHorseNoMustache 17h ago
Not to mention the hit they'd take on dividends!
Look I'm beginning to think this whole 'lemonade stand' concept is a liability. Let's pivot and sell the whole thing to private equity!
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u/QuestionabIeAdvice 12h ago
Daddy divorced her mother, closed down the family, and opened a new family in a different town.
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u/ReindeerCreepy6502 1d ago
Daughter attempted to form a union so Dad paid the older brother to "convince" her that it was not in her best interest, thus keeping almost all of the $52.
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u/StFuzzySlippers 1d ago
*Daddy shutdown the lemonade stand before the vote could go take place. Then he put daughter in the street after she couldn't afford to pay rent.
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u/aybeeayseeaybeebee 1d ago
Daddy should have hired Pinkertons to deal with his daughter's labor revolution.
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u/ConflictExtreme1540 4h ago
Dad stopped paying for her free healthcare, food, Shelter, and security as a result. Daughter: shocked Pikachu face
If anything, this is a great way of explaining why socialism. He provides everything to her "for free" but any money she earns has to go to the state (the dad who provides everything for free)
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u/Mr-Snarky 1d ago
Heâs the investor who literally did nothing that could even be considered âlaborâ. Shit, or even considered âworkingâ.
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u/Wash_zoe_mal 1d ago
My landlord just raised the rent.
I feel this and it pisses me off
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u/Massive-Employee-696 1d ago
Text your landlord that you've just had a gunsafe installed, the MF won't do it again đ
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u/devilmaskrascal 1d ago
She made $2. How can she complain when she didn't put any capital forward?
Plus she gets to inherit your lemonade empire when you die so
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u/appoplecticskeptic 23h ago
Youâre assuming there will be anything left to inherit. A father that would do this likely leaves just about nothing behind. Now that heâs normalized the rich exploiting the poor it would be wrong to give her lots of money. She would be a terror to behold after this lesson. Better not to give her much. She may hate you for it but at least she wonât become another capitalist leach.
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u/NoHorseNoMustache 1d ago
If she would have priced her lemonade correctly she could have had as much as $5 more in profit!
Invisible hand, baby!
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u/Technical-Sky-5765 1d ago
Tomorrow Walter is going to replace his daughter with an AI agent that wonât require feeding or a college fund
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u/AnimaLepton 1d ago
Are people here legitimately missing the joke?
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u/appoplecticskeptic 23h ago
What joke? Itâs an honest lesson. Thatâs how capitalism exploits workers. Better to learn the truth while youâre still young so you can bolster your expectations than go into the workforce eager to please and get exploited far worse and potentially for far longer before learning the lesson the hard way as a young adult.
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u/Durpulous 23h ago
I think the joke is that it's an inversion of the typical conservative "I taught my kids about communism by stealing their cake" type posts. Can still ring true and also be a joke.
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u/AnimaLepton 19h ago
Yep, exactly what the other comment is mentioning. It''s clearly parodying a particular kind 'antisocialism' post where someone posts about taking Halloween candy from their kid or whatever to show them the 'dangers of socialism.' But then a bunch of comments on this are talking about how this is going to traumatize the daughter, or how she's going to go no contact with him in the future or whatever, which is what I mean by people taking it seriously/ignoring that it's pretty clearly a joke.
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u/rumpworm 23h ago
There is no lesson here. The little girl never agreed to any of this. Investors aren't parents who you love and trust. They don't just set up a business for you give you a job and take your money only to announce the terms and conditions afterward.
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u/appoplecticskeptic 22h ago edited 22h ago
> The little girl never agreed to any of this
Yeah thatâs called being a kid. Parents sign you up to learn lessons whether you want to or not.
>They donât just ⌠only to announce the terms and conditions afterwards.
Officially no, they donât hold all the terms until the end however Iâm fairly sure there are some investors out there who befriend you, make you think they are on the up and up and after youâre getting along well say theyâll get you a job under them. âCome by my office later and Iâll have it drawn upâ. Then when you get there they hand you a lengthy contract that you in no way have time to read, while pressuring you to sign it and acting like if you stop to read it first then you donât trust them and that hurts because âarenât we friends?â. Lots of people get conned into signing contracts they havenât read with tricks like this. Donât act like that never happens. In fact Iâd wager the majority of contracts were barely read if at all because you have to consider the growing number of things that have a EULA attached. I know for sure almost nobody reads those.
Another version of the scamming you into bad contract is that they promise to print you off a copy but never do or else they take months to get around to it and they make changes to it in the meantime. If you bring up a supposed discrepancy they claim you must be remembering it wrong. There are lots of white color criminals in late stage capitalism. They are everywhere there is money.
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u/fungi_at_parties 1d ago
He acts like these costs were external, but he set the prices specifically to steal all the wages instead of deciding to split the money with her.
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u/newbie527 đˇ Good Union Jobs For All 1d ago
âThis is how I taught my little girl to be a socialist.â
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u/Dexter2100 1d ago
Imagine making only 26 times less than the CEO. Iâd have more money than Iâd know what to do with at that ratio.
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u/iliya193 1d ago
Man, PragerU made an absolutely horrendous video about the idea of the investors and owners taking the biggest risks and thus reaping the biggest rewards. Toward the end, they encouraged viewers to tell food service workers to be grateful and that the owners took the biggest risks so the workers should be happy with their wages.
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u/Arrow156 1d ago
Fuck their risk, what about the risk we put ourselves through to meet their insane greed? They could lose some money, while we will lose time, sanity, and very our jobs though dealing with their unfeasible bullshit. The only real risk they'll ever have to deal with is walking in public without an armed bodyguard.
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u/prince-pauper âď¸ Tax The Billionaires 1d ago
He said âLet me be the person you remember as the source of all your trauma, young one.â
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u/wtfiwon 1d ago
"Exploitation begins at home." - Unwritten Rule of Acquisition
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u/Ordoferrum 1d ago
Actually it's rule #110.
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u/wtfiwon 1d ago
There is no #110.
https://memory-alpha.fandom.com/wiki/Rules_of_Acquisition#Official_rules
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u/Ordoferrum 1d ago
You are totally correct. I was sure it was a numbered rule and presumed chatgpt would get it right when I asked what rule it was. Unfortunately it got the rule number from a fan script when I double checked it's source... I've got to stop asking chatgpt arbitrary questions without checking it's sources.
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u/Shutupfanboy đŤ AFT Member 1d ago
You should have then invested the money in SpaceX and told her you needed some more t.
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u/TheMaStif 1d ago
Don't forget to also insist that this is the only viable way, and all other ways of dealing with things will destroy the world
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u/Lowerfuzzball 1d ago
And then she took my bitch-ass to court because she didn't agree to these exorbitant, exploitative terms. She also won't talk to me anymore??
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u/vprasad1 1d ago
Isn't this a copy paste of an old Ken what's his name Linked In Lunatics spoof account?
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u/ThanosSnapsSlimJims 1d ago
So... teaching her that working means keeping two out of all the money you make?
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u/Apathetic_Villainess 4h ago
Pretty much. No matter how much profit you bring in, you only get a set amount. So if she makes $62 the next day, she still only gets to keep the $2.
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u/ALiarNamedAlex 1d ago
This is a âhaha yeah capitalism is bad momentâ which I donât disagree with, but if this was real or recreated elsewhere for real then you should also take the time to math out what to price your product so you still make a profit, and also how to negotiate with shitty investors lining to screw you over⌠aka the dad
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u/zoeykailyn 1d ago
Can we start replacing their key with that new neofent coming out of China yet?
Cartels around the world we'd probably thank you for doing a public service
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u/smilysmilysmooch 1d ago
And the business folded because there was no money left over for overhead meaning the business would have to fold as they didnt have enough money to employ people. Seems like a short sighted move by a greedy investor who invested in a business that couldn't stay open past 1 day.
They own the entire expenditure chain of the business. The business folds, nobody purchases the lemonade, the lawn is vacant. Just seems short sighted imo.
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u/AppropriateSea5746 23h ago
In communism I just call her a petite bourgeoisie and give her earnings to the state.
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u/AppropriateSea5746 23h ago
This metaphor makes no sense. Soif I'm paying for literally everything including my employees housing and the employee just has to use their basic motor skills to sell lemonade I don't get the majority of the profit? Obviously it's different with my kid but not with a random employee lol
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u/zph0eniz 23h ago
Mmm i feel like capitalism still ultimately needs people to work for the rich, so i think the inaccuracy is giving just enough to do the work, but barely
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u/ivysmorgue 22h ago
there was a boondocks episode with this concept. jazmine sets up a lemonade stand, a fat white rich businessman buys her stand and brand and promises a pony for her. then, he takes pretty much all of her money for said âponyâ while she works and works and works and sees none of the profits.
when tom (her dad) and jazmine wanna stop, the fat fuck basically tells her âwell your pony is gonna die if you stop!â
that is capitalism.
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u/SolusIgtheist 22h ago edited 22h ago
It sounds like you didn't educate her properly. You're only supposed to get a cut of profits post-expenses. 20/54 is roughly 37% (which is extremely high to begin with, possible fraud/gouging case there), but you're supposed to take that out of the 22 remaining after expenses, which is roughly $8. So she should have made $14 instead of $2, which would put her earnings over yours so your explanation doesn't even make sense. Frankly, she should be able to sue you for the difference. If you had educated her properly she would know this.
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u/FridayDreams 22h ago
If he'a charging rent for the lawn, table, and supplies, then it doesn't seem like he's invested any capital into the business so he wouldn't be entitled to take a portion of the profits.
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u/Accomplished-Staff-9 21h ago
Probably fake, and terrible parenting if true. Thatâs how you end up in a home by yourself when you need her most!
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u/Mysterious-Drummer74 17h ago
The amount of people here unable to tell a clear joke is slightly concerning.
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u/Itchy_Psychology3300 11h ago
Vast majority of jobs can be learned. Employees can run a business too, without owners, executives, or senior managers.
ESOPs operate AND are successful too.
Investors are just parasites who want money off the labor of others. Then theyâll hold that leverage until the end of time âwell I invested early in the company, I deserve all I put in a million times back, multiplied by infinityâ. It never stops.
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u/djinnisequoia 3h ago
Then the next day you insisted as major shareholder that she simply wave 1 lemon over plain water and call that lemonade, so you can keep the $12 for supplies. (the single lemon is paid for by raising her prices)
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u/KlatuuBarradaNicto 3h ago
You forgot the â and you should just be grateful for the opportunityâ part.
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u/BadBrains16 1d ago
I suspect a low contact relationship with this âinvestorâ when his daughter is an adult.
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[deleted]
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u/longagofaraway 1d ago
If you told me this was an anti-capitalist post, I'd believe you.
because it is
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u/Alarming-Philosophy 17h ago
Thatâs not a lesson on capitalism thatâs a lesson on arbitrary power.
Thatâs like saying:
I set up a lemonade stand to teach my daughter about communism.
She spent all day making lemonade and earned $54.
At dinner I took all of the money.
Your brother wanted a new video game.
Your sister wanted concert tickets.
Mom wanted a spa day.
I gave them all the money because they said they needed it more than you.
When my daughter asked why she didnât get to keep what she earned, I explained that in our family, resources are distributed according to need, not who produced them.
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u/ConflictExtreme1540 4h ago
Lol at how incredibly stupid this is. He gives her free shelter, food, education, and security. Then tells her to go work for him for free. Sounds more like socialism or communism to me....
Nothing about what he described is how capitalism works....
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u/vegasEd1313 1d ago
I had a similar experience. My daughter set up a lemonade stand and made $60. I took $50 and gave it to the neighborhood kids who just sat home all day and watched tv. Why should my daughter have $60 when other kids have nothing. When she cried, I explained Democratic Socialism.
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u/PrettyBoyDude 1d ago
Hilarious that even in your demonization(and incorrect presentation) of democratic socialism, the little girl is still better off by a 5x magnitude than the girl experiencing the actual exploitation of capitalism, well done!
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u/vegasEd1313 23h ago
She would have actually made $70 but kids kept coming by to steal lemonade and the cops wouldnât do anything because her ancestors probably exploited themâŚohâŚand another thingâŚshe isnât better off because she paid $15 for supplies and was going to close down her stand but the neighborhood protested why is the only lemonade stand in the area closing.
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u/Metaclueless 1d ago
The premise is fuxked. âWalterâ set up a lemonade stand. Not his daughter. His daughter âworkedâ the lemonade stand and should be paid an hourly wage. Plus commission.
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u/Loud-Ad-2280 âď¸ Tax The Billionaires 1d ago
Sheâs an independent contractor so no wages or commission, welcome to capitalism
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u/rept7 1d ago
Nah, it's actually even more accurate. The mom isn't threatening the dad if he doesn't treat their daughter better, there isn't another family on the block hosting a competing lemonade stand, and the daughter isn't teaming up with her siblings to overthrow their father. This is literally just pure unregulated capitalism.
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u/felis_scipio 1d ago
So if investors canât profit from risking their money to fund a new business, where does the money come from to start new businesses?
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u/FickleStomach0 1d ago
Anyone who tries to promote communism/socialism is a psyop- the history is absolutely clear that capitalism has been the greatest concept in human history in terms of freedom and progression as a society.
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u/Professional-Box4153 1d ago
You didn't negotiate any of these terms prior to sending her out to work. If it was TRUE Capitalism, she could sue you for exploitative practices, lost wages, and pain and suffering. She'll probably still lose since she can't afford a decent lawyer, but even a pro bono one is going to drag you through the dirt long enough that you'll lose money in the long run.
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u/monkeyinnamonkeysuit 1d ago
TRUE capitalism would say that it was also on her to negotiate her terms. Protection from explotative practices and lost wages is very much capitalism restrained with bare minimum worker protections.
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u/Independent-Bug-9352 18h ago
That means you now require a judicial system, rule of law; which means laws must exist; which means someone must create those laws ("wages"? "Pain and suffering"?) in an impartial fashion. Which means now you need regulation.
He's teaching her Anarcho-Capitalism or Laissez-Faire capitalism, which never fucking work.
So yes, true capitalism will fail without a Democracy that is above the markets in hierarchy.
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u/Mudfry 1d ago
Wrong. The owner takes the biggest risk.
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u/JimJimmery 1d ago
Investors have ownership.
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u/Mudfry 1d ago
Ownership is not being the owner.
The majority of investors arenât 100% invested into a single business like the owner would be.
Owners and employees take the most risk followed investors 3rd.
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u/JimJimmery 8h ago
Ownership is 100% being at least part owner. If you start a business then want to raise money to be able to sustain or expand, investors are going to want ownership whether public or private.
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u/quietsauce 1d ago
Love that "took the risk" argument. The risk is being a worker.