Main Nagpur ke ek middle-class family se hoon. Hamare ghar mein hamesha ek hi sapna tha achhi padhai karo, achhi job lo, aur family ki zimmedari sambhalo. Jab mera Mumbai ke college mein admission hua, mere parents ko laga ki unka sapna sach hone laga hai. Unhone mujh par bharosa kiya, aur maine bhi socha ki main unki har umeed poori karunga.
Lekin college ki journey utni aasaan nahi thi. Academics mein main utna strong nahi tha aur dheere-dheere mere 5 KT (backlogs) ho gaye. Placement season aaya, lekin mujhe campus placement nahi mili.
Us din laga tha ki shayad sab khatam ho gaya hai. Lekin maine haar nahi maani. Maine khud companies mein apply karna shuru kiya. Kai rejections ke baad mujhe Delhi mein ek Business Development Executive ki job mil gayi ₹35,000 per month. Sabse surprising baat yeh thi ki company ne meri academic backlogs ke baare mein verification nahi kiya. Mujhe laga, "Bas, ab zindagi track par aa jayegi."
Main Delhi shift ho gaya. Training khatam hui aur asli kaam shuru hua. Lekin BDE role meri expectation se bahut alag tha. Roz ke targets, constant pressure, aur hectic routine. Maine apni taraf se poori koshish ki, lekin main targets achieve nahi kar paaya. Sirf ek mahine baad mujhe job se nikal diya gaya.
Jab main ghar wapas gaya, to sirf main hi nahi, mere parents bhi toot gaye the. Unhone mujhe kuch nahi kaha, bas itna bola, " Government exam ki taiyari karo. Wahi tumhare liye sahi rahega."
Maine unki baat maan li. Pichhle ek mahine se main roz 9–10 ghante padh raha hoon. Pehli baar lag raha tha ki main apni life ko dobara bana sakta hoon.
Phir ek aur twist aaya.
College se mail aaya ki meri bachi hui KT exams July aur August mein hongi. Mujhe Mumbai wapas aana pada. Lekin is baar maine ghar walon ko sach nahi bataya. Maine unse kaha ki mujhe Mumbai mein job mil gayi hai aur joining ke liye wapas jaana zaroori hai.
Mere parents bahut khush ho gaye. Unhe laga ki unka beta phir se apne pairon par khada ho raha hai. Shayad bahut dino baad maine unke chehre par itni khushi dekhi thi. Lekin woh khushi dekhkar mere andar ek alag hi bojh aa gaya.
Haqeeqat yeh thi ki main job ke liye nahi, apni KT exams dene Mumbai aaya tha.
Ab unhe lagta hai ki main Mumbai mein job kar raha hoon. Kuch hi dino mein woh mujhse paise ki umeed bhi karenge, kyunki unhe yakeen hai ki meri salary aani shuru ho gayi hogi. Aur yahin se meri sabse badi tension shuru hoti hai.
Ek taraf government exam ki preparation hai, jiske liye main poori mehnat kar raha hoon. Doosri taraf meri KT exams hain, jinhe clear kiye bina degree complete nahi hogi. Aur teesri taraf ghar walon ka bharosa hai, jise todne se main sabse zyada darta hoon.
Kabhi-kabhi raat ko bas ek hi sawal dimag mein ghoomta rehta hai...
Main kya karun?
Kya main unhe sab sach bata doon? Ya pehle KT clear karun, government exam ki taiyari continue rakhoon aur kisi tarah ek job dhoondh kar unki umeedon par khara utarne ki koshish karun?