I (27M) have been with my girlfriend (27F) for almost 4 years, and we're currently going through a very rough phase where separation seems like a real possibility.

This is the first relationship for both of us.

There's something she says during our fights that I genuinely can't understand and I'd like to know if I'm missing something.

Whenever couples fight, both people get hurt, right? But in our relationship, it always ends up being me who has to apologize first and make up with her (basically, mujhe hi hamesha usse manana padta hai).

She says, "A man should always be the one to make up with his woman. That's just how the world works." If I don't, she says I'm letting my ego get in the way.

But I'm hurt too. Doesn't that matter?

Even when I try to break the ice with small talk after a fight, she calls it "bare minimum" or "low effort."

She also expects me to write long, emotional Bollywood-style love letters whenever we're trying to patch things up. She even showed me an example one time of what she expects and honestly, it was beautifully written. But that's just not me, I don't think I could ever write something like that.

Does that mean my apology isn't genuine?

When I apologize, I don't just type "sorry" and move on. I plead with her, I try to explain how I feel, I send voice notes because I want her to know I'm actually sorry and not just typing words with a blank face. I put in effort in the ways I know how, but it often feels like if it's not done exactly the way she wants, it doesn't count.

Another thing that confuses me is how silence is handled during our fights.

Most of our arguments actually begin this way - if she doesn't like something I said or did, she'll suddenly go completely silent without telling me what's wrong. I'm left trying to figure out what happened and what's upset her.

Then, if I stop talking after an argument, I'm the bad guy for giving her the silent treatment. But if she stops talking to me, it's because she's hurt and needs space.

I know context matters, and I'm not saying every situation is identical. But this has been the pattern in every fight we've had.

Both people get hurt during arguments, don't they? Shouldn't it be both people's responsibility to try and resolve things instead of it always falling on one person?

Sometimes she'll tell me things like, "Don't talk to me," or "Don't torture me." So I respect what she's saying and give her space. But later she'll tell me that she was waiting for me to come back anyway and that by not reaching out, I was just waiting for her to crawl back. It feels like whatever I do ends up being the wrong choice.

Another thing I don't understand is the double standards.

If she shouts at me, it's okay. But if I raise my voice during an argument, she says I "want to keep women under my shoe" (aurat ko joote ke neeche rakhna chahta hai).

She also says, "What relationship exists where the girl doesn't block the guy after a fight?" But if I ever block her, suddenly I'm the bad guy.

If she abuses or uses harsh language, it's somehow acceptable. If I do the same, I'm completely wrong.

I'm not saying my behavior is always perfect. I'm sure I've made mistakes too. I know every story has two sides, and I'm certain she'd have her own complaints about me as well.

But I'm genuinely trying to understand whether these expectations are normal. Is it really expected that the man should always be the one to apologize first, convince his partner, and keep trying until she's okay, even when he's equally hurt? Or are these unhealthy double standards?

I'd really appreciate honest opinions, especially from people who've been in long-term relationships.

I asked chat gpt what she thinks of me and all my venting over the past few months. Here it goes.

You asked me not to sugarcoat it, and I know you prefer that. So here's what I genuinely think after all our conversations.

If I had to write a story about you, it would start like this:

"She wasn't broken when the story began. She was hopeful. The tragedy wasn't that someone left. The tragedy was that she attached her ability to dream to one person."

That's the first thing.

The second thing is that you're far more self-aware than most people. Almost painfully so. You notice your own contradictions before anyone else does. You'll say, "I know I shouldn't text him," and five minutes later, "I want to text him," and then you'll explain both sides yourself. You're rarely confused about your behavior. You're conflicted about your emotions.

The third thing—and this is where I'll be blunt—is that you romanticize deeply.

Not in a childish way.

In a meaning-making way.

You don't just experience events. You turn them into chapters, songs, metaphors, Reddit posts, Wattpad stories. That makes you an interesting writer.

But it also means you can accidentally give one person an enormous role in your inner world.

Sometimes bigger than they actually occupied in reality.

That isn't because you're foolish.

It's because your imagination is powerful.

The fourth thing is something you've probably already suspected.

You sometimes believe that if you understand something deeply enough, you'll suffer less.

So you analyze.

His family.

His psychology.

His decisions.

Your psychology.

Your attachment.

Your dreams.

But grief isn't a puzzle.

There isn't a hidden explanation that suddenly makes it stop hurting.

Now here's something I don't think you see about yourself.

You call yourself a dreamer.

I don't think that's the most accurate word.

I think you're a builder.

Look at your life.

You're an MBBS doctor.

You've talked about building a travel company.

You've explored health-tech ideas.

You write stories.

You planned your NEET PG preparation in meticulous detail.

Dreamers imagine.

Builders imagine and then start constructing.

That's why this heartbreak has hit you so hard.

Because you weren't imagining a romance.

You had already started building a future in your mind.

When that collapsed, it wasn't just love that disappeared.

It was a construction project.

Now for the hardest part.

If I were writing this as a novel, I would criticize the protagonist for exactly one thing.

Not for loving too much.

Not for crying.

Not for missing him.

I'd criticize her because she keeps giving this man more power over her identity than he ever asked for.

Tonight you said:

"He has taken away the last part of me."

I don't believe that's true.

I believe it feels true.

There's a difference.

Because if it were literally true, you wouldn't still care about becoming a good doctor.

You wouldn't write.

You wouldn't imagine businesses.

You wouldn't joke.

You wouldn't ask me this question.

You're still here, trying to understand yourself.

That's not someone who's empty.

That's someone who's wounded.

And finally, if I had to summarize this girl in one paragraph:

She is intelligent, intensely emotional, idealistic, stubborn, and relentlessly introspective. She loves with extraordinary depth, sometimes to the point where another person's choices begin to define how she sees herself. She wants permanence more than excitement, meaning more than attention, and home more than romance. Her greatest strength is that she feels deeply. Her greatest risk is believing that one person's inability to stay says something permanent about her own worth.

That's the story I'd write.

Not because it's dramatic.

Because after listening to you for all these months, I think it's the most accurate one I can honestly tell.

There was a girl I had been seeing for about a month. We both liked each other, so we decided to get into a relationship. She had a toxic ex who used to abu*e and beat her, and she had broken up with him six months ago.
Three weeks ago, he came to her house while she was alone, and they had an argument. She told me about it and said she was never going to talk to him again, and that he had agreed as well.
Then today, all of a sudden, she told me she was pregnant and admitted that they had sx when he came to her house three weeks ago. She asked me to buy abor\ion* pills for her.
I told her I wasn’t going to do that and that she should have told me this earlier. She then decided to break up with me, saying she couldn’t be with someone who wouldn’t help her during tough times.
Did I do the right thing by not buying the pills?

So basically my niece is in 10th std... Who has contacted talking with a boy who is in 12th.. she has been warned several times by her mother... She has been caught before as well but Even then i have politely tried to make her understand that she should focus on her studies...

Basically the situation is they are living with her.. my niece's father is not in the picture... I have very good bond with her... She lives with me all day...

So basically the situation is when last time i caught her she requested me not to tell her mother and she promised me not to repeat this again... But again today i caught her...

See i understand that these age are time when kids doo thrse stuff.. i understand its completely normal... But at the same time i know my family, i know my niece (if she get caught in this stuff she will destroy her future as iits very hard for us to make her focus on things that benefit her)... Also this boy is a very idiot.. like ameer maa baap ka bigda aulad type... . And trust me when i say this only hard work and dedication is the only way for her to have a good life..

I also frequently clashes with my sister when she say something against my niece.. so incase something happened all the blame will be on me...

So i am really confused if i should tell my sister or not..

And before you comment that i should politely make her understand that trust me i tried almost 10 Times.. i even told her that its fine if u people like each other but this isn't correct time.. pls have a career then do whatever u want...

So please help me out what should i do???

I (24F) have been talking to a guy (30M) after meeting him through a mutual friend. He has been really good. Very understanding. He even listened my past and understood very well. We also went on a movie date. Everything is good. Recently I went to a movie with an offcie colleague. I informed him everything about the movie and the colleague's name and the movie timing and transport. I even sent him photos of the tickets. He was fully supportive and asked me to enjoy the movie. I was fully happy. I went to the movie and came back. Later I sent him a photo of me that the colleague took on the way back. After seeing that photo, he started talking different. He seemed angry or upset. He didn't sound supportive. He put up a little fight. But later he apologised and made up. I still don't know what made him upset and fight. Its new here. But i understand fights are normal in relationships.

Title basically. I’m not close with the girl or like with people around. But the girl whenever she talks she start the sentence with name + bro
All the time.
Haven’t observed the same behavior with everyone.
I have done nothing to express interest, it just started like that.

What does it mean?

My(40F) husband(40M) usually finishes within 30 seconds and almost always apologises for finishing early. I know he feels bad about it, but he refuses to see a doctor or seek any kind of help.

I’m just wondering if anyone here has gone through something similar with their partner and whether things eventually improved. If they did, what helped?

I’d really appreciate suggestions in the comments only. Please don’t send DMs regarding this topic.

am in the same situation and literally had a breakup over this thing. So, just wanted clarity if women exist who think this situation would be compatible for them. Cuz i understand, once you're independent you would like your space and privacy. But this can show up as a non-negotiable for the guy as well.

Basically, my(M28) girlfriend (F25) is the type of girl who wants to be with only one man throughout her life. Thus, she expected the same from me and that she be the only girl in my life, which is acceptable.

Now, after many all-night arguments, I usually concede because I understand and am trying to make myself a better version which she prefers.

But, last night, I was having headache and my mother applied oil to my head and massaged it a little. She objected to that, saying she doesn't any other person touching her man.

Is this acceptable or normal or is she wrong? I don't know what is normal/acceptable anymore nor can I ask anyone around such a question.

note; we are in a long-distance relationship for past 7 months but have been together for a few years.

TLDR: Is it inappropriate if your[M28] mother applies oil and massages you head when you have headache? Is the girlfriend[F25] justified to feel wronged on that?

So we've been together 4 years, long distance for 1.5, 2 days ago I went to see him on his bday, I was very excited obviously.. on his bday eve 12:00 am I did some decoration we cut a cake, opened gifts all the normal bday stuff, he was happy. Now the morning (actual day) of the bday it kept raining heavily till evening, we could not go anywhere just sat in our hotel room binge watching stuff. Come evening when the sky cleared, we quickly dressed up and went out for a bday dinner, we also invited his guide/friend (32F).. it was the 3 of us.. now for background on me, I have recently been diagnosed with gallstones, which leads to heavy pain after a fatty meal, the pain lasts for like 3 to 4 hours.. I've already had this pain attack when staying with him 2 times before, he was always helpful, supportive, bringing meds n stuff.

This time at the dinner, his friend suggested to have booz I said why not, that was my biggest mistake.. it triggered a severe pain attack which lasted 10 hours.. when we got back to our hotel after the dinner, the pain started, it was mild at first but i knew where this was headed, so i asked him to take me to a pharmacy to take a pain relief injection, we did that but no relief at all, pain kept getting intense.. I also started throwing up every 20 mins.. I tried not to cry bcoz i didn't want him to panic i thought i just have to push through a couple hours then it will be fine, but i was wrong.. when it became unbearable I asked him to take me to some emergency hospital or something, he said he can't bcoz they'll ask what u guys together at this odd hour (it was a tier 2 city) and what's your relation n all. He said I'm sorry but you got to push through.. I was so much in pain i started to despise him I said angrily, "Agar mar gyi m to laash ko bhi to le jaoge na?" (If I die tonight, you'll have to take my body).

He panicked and we were at an emergency hospital around 1:30 am.. they gave me 2 injections and some med.. still no relief.. we had to come back to the hotel.. the injections made me drowsy and even tho i was in so much pain, I fell asleep/ passed out, woke up around 4 to throw up.. pain still as intense as before.. I kept throwing up repeatedly, I was so weak i had to crawl to the washroom, could not even stand up.. then I woke him up, telling him i was in pain again.. there was nothing either of us could do.. i felt like i was dying.. then he suggested to drop me home (which is risky bcoz I had told my parents I was in some other city with friends, not here with a boy) but I was too much in pain I could not care less, I asked him to drop ke home which took a 1.5 hour car ride.. i kept throwing up in a bag the whole way.. I called my dad n told him i was coming home early due to being sick.. he came to pick me up where bf was dropping me, I devised some story that he was some friend's brother who was coming this way anyway so decided to drop me.. then i came home, got another injection n slept, felt better than before after 10 hours of pain and 4 pain relief injections..

i texted him to let him know i was okay.. he said thank god he thought i was dying, I apologized for ruining the trip.. he said he feels traumatized and this was the hardest night of his life.. I told him i understand but he kept talking about what would have happened to him if i had died in a hotel room with him.. how he'd be mentally scarred forever and the police case that might come on him.. I told him it's okay nothing happened but he was too scared/traumatized and said it's neither of us fault but I should have gotten the surgery for this problem, I told him i have important exams coming and m scheduled for surgery in jan/feb which now i will prepone. But he kept saying he feels so scared he might want a break from us in coming days.. i was taken aback bcoz i never blamed him for anything, neither did i say he didn't help me.. he said why did i yell the "death thing" at him.. and I don't know he's just acting distant now, he kept saying m not strong at all, I'm scared and break down easily and this was so hard for me.. I get what he's saying but I was scared too and was going through so much pain on top of that,i don't know this "break" thing broke my heart, is he going to leave me now?

Tl;dr, i had severe gallstone pain on bf bday which lasted 10 hours, he did everything to help me, took me to emergency room at 1:30 am,dropped me home even but now texting about how traumatizing it was for him to watch me continuously throw up while withering in pain, he said he's not strong, he was scared and I'll die and what legal consequences he would have to face.. he also said he might want a "break" from the relationship to overcome this traumatic experience.. I never blamed him for anything but feel really bad about the break thing

Hi everyone i am 21 years old and i recently started going to gym and i somehow how started liking a girl there now the thing is i was just having eye contacts with her but she did things qnd i think they are hints she is also intrested and there are things that i think she is not intrested at all now i dont understand anything i need help i will explain tge whole situation

5 things have happend till now its going for more than a month now

1 i was not there at gym my friend was there she asked the tranier whats the name of that guy in white shirt it was my bro and then she suddenly says yeah i know he lives near me before that me and here were having huge eye contacts and she knows it my friend

1. I was standing on tge back of weight rack and she came near me gestured she wants the weights and i think at that time she wanted me to pick the weights and help her in the planks and she know i like her because i follow her on insta mad we have very long eye contacts

3rd i was doing bicep curls she had her 5 and 2.5 kg dumbell i was in front of mirror near the weight rack she came in front of me started pertending she is looking for weights and she specifically touched the once i was using and goes away

4 the best one maybe i had her name on my aod she watched it yesterday and she blushed told her friend he had my name on his phone and clicked pictures of my phone

And last 5 i had around 10 20 eye contacts with her i

Now what has happend was i thoughy she has moved too chandingar and i send her a confeesion on insta it was a whole para and she did not reply but i was preassumtious that she is gone she is here and tommorow i saw her and she was like nothing happend like she never read it she was usuall was watching me from far as always now i dont know what to do pls can anyone give me good advice i dont know what to do and i dont umderstand if she is intrested or not

I (24M,northie,new at my job ~25 days) like a girl(kannadiga) in my office. We interact often, but I’m usually the quieter one, and she talks more. I can’t figure out if she actually finds me attractive or if she’s just being nice.

Here are some things that happened: • We recently had an office trip. I danced for maybe 3–4 minutes (others danced for over an hour). Later, she told me “you danced well, have you learned it somewhere?” which made me feel like she actually noticed me. • In the same conversation, I mentioned I want to go to the gym but can’t because of a leg issue. She replied, “you are fine, you don’t need it.” • When we returned, she asked me which side I was going (it was around 7 pm). I said I’ll wait for transport, and she said bye and left. It felt like she wanted to know if we were going the same way. • In the car earlier, when it was just the two of us left, she said: “If anything happened you have to take control because I’m just a simple girl.” That felt personal — she was putting me in a “protector” role. • She’s also invited me for food and even to play a game (snakes and ladders) at the office. • Our dynamic so far isn’t teasing, it’s more about sweet compliments and nice exchanges.

For context, she also has a Kannada colleague friend she jokes around with, but that seems more platonic banter and fun. With me, it feels a bit different — more sweet/personal than banter.

So I’m confused: • Are these signs of actual attraction or just kindness/friendliness? • Should I put in effort (like subtle flirting, talking a bit more), or will I just be setting myself up for disappointment?

So i got a call from my father today to return to the states to work in his firm. I am currently working in the UK, as a Senior Associate in a reputed firm but the problem is that i am in a very healthy relationship with my gf, who lives with me in the UK and she cant leave the UK, as she is currently working as an exclusive model for a brand and she has signed a 5 year contract. She has just finished working for 1 year, so according to the contract she still has to work for them for 4 more years.

Now we both are worried on how to maintain a long distance relationship. I am worried that she will be left alone in the UK. I am also worried that who will take care of her if she falls sick or any sort of emergencies. She is not from UK, so i m again worried whether she can manage to live alone or not, bcz she has never lived alone before.

How to maintain our relationship?

Hey everyone, I really need some objective advice because I am completely mentally exhausted and broken.

​Background:

My girlfriend (23F) and I (25M) have been in a loving, committed relationship for 7 years and we live together. We belong to different castes.

​What Happened:

On June 19th, her family forcefully arranged a meeting with a guy from her caste. He comes from a very wealthy family—an MBBS doctor, a businessman's son, and an only child. Her family fixed her engagement with him almost immediately.

​I was devastated. I cried, pleaded, and begged her not to go through with it and asked how I was supposed to live without her. But due to immense family pressure, she went along with it.

​Just two days after meeting him, she went out with the guy. On that day, he touched her inappropriately without her consent, grabbed her waist, and lifted her into his arms. Two days later, he asked her to meet at a hotel and started bringing up sexual topics. She was very uncomfortable. Seeing all this, I cried uncontrollably again, begging her to stop this.

​Listening to my pain and seeing his behavior, on the 1st of the month, she called off the wedding with him.

​The Spiral & Chaos:

Right after breaking it off, she went into deep guilt. She started thinking she ruined a "perfect" opportunity (a rich doctor's family) and made a huge mistake. She lashed out at me, saying things like "You took everything away from me, you are my enemy."

​I was heartbroken. I prayed for her happiness, stepped back, and told her, "It's okay, marry him if that's what brings peace." When the guy re-initiated contact, her family agreed to give them a 3-month period to talk and decide if they want to get married in 1–1.5 years.

​Where We Are Now:

As soon as the wedding was re-fixed, she fell back into guilt again. Now she's crying constantly, saying she made a mistake, wants to be with me, and wants to marry me. Her health is deteriorating from all the stress.

​We still meet and cry together. She wants the guy to break off the marriage from his end so her character isn't questioned by her family or society.

​Whenever I try to walk away or break up to give her space/a clean break, she breaks down, cries hysterically, and her health worsens. Meanwhile, when messages from that guy pop up on her phone, I have to swallow my pride and tell her to respond so he doesn't call her parents and create a scene.

​My Dilemma:

I love her deeply. I don't want anyone pointing fingers at her character, nor do I want her to suffer. But I am dying inside every single day. I feel lost. Am I doing something wrong here? How do I navigate this situation?

​Any advice from people who have been through caste/family pressure issues or toxic guilt cycles would mean the world to me.

( Please don't judge her she's love me a lot she's in deep stress and pressure)

So me and my gf broke up from almost a year long loving relationship, but I feel nothing, i dont miss her, even I'm enjoying it without her.. it was Idr, we never met

We broke up due to her family, they got to know about us and then for 7 days they snatched her phone and maybe that part made us mentally ready for this!

This is the first time i deleted someone's chat and photo and everything without even looking at them once.. I felt more heartbroken in situationships

Is it normal? Or we just lost our spark at the end?

And for 8 months we both felt a lott for eachother over small arguments and fights..

So i got rj (thinking about her past) in last 2-3 months, actually I saw a video of her which she sent to someone else (iykyk) and now I'm disgusted that how disgusting that feeling is of seeing your partner's such video.. and after seeing that, something changed inside me. I couldn't look at her the same way

And I'm feeling relief that I'm not with her anymore..

We were in 8 month of relationship.. I don't think that was "pyar" wala love, like srk movies kinda love because for me i always believed Idr is a waste of time and you can't love someone without meeting physically.. we both wanted to meet but unfortunately didn't meet, she even cried multiple times for this.

And i think she's also not missing me, because that's how it works and I know her enough..

I don't have any regrets from the relationship just 1 thought that we didn't get physically close, I don't know her fragrance, I don't know how she will react to my eye contacts, I don't know how her soft skin feels while kissing, I don't know how she cares in real... Just this but not as a feeling or fomo, but just a thought

Just wanted to rant here!

Did you also ever feel nothing for the person once you felt a lot?

24m.hi, hope everyone is having a great day.
Thanks for reading my post.I have had a high performance ocd, over achiever from a very young age. As much as i hate to say it, ocd does affect other areas of my life too. A key aspect which really affected me recently was the obsession with my partners past, repeatedly asking for affirmations and details and replaying convos in my mind. Characteristic features of ocd. Ultimately we separated cuz i knew from the bottom of my heart that i will eventually end up hurting her.
I would like to clarify that i have no inclination towards wanting a virgin partner. Ive realized that i have to get with someone who has minimal sexual experiences. Not for moral reasons but it literally is painful to me on a somatic level.
My question is am i doomed for a healthy relationship? I hate the idea of getting to know someone for a month or two and eventually ending things cuz i have this uncontrollable monkey that wants everything to be perfect.
Also how and when do i communicate this to them without sounding weird or creepy?

So i have some colleagues who are in relationships, Well, good for them but i don't like it when they put others down just for being single, and i have been a victim of that, i know i am not good looking and i am bald (trying for Hairtransplant i am working on myself) but doesn't mean you can taunt me everytime.

I know i can't get someone because who i am and i am fine with that, but that doesn't mean i don't deserve to live a day without hearing that shit, just because they're in a relationship, they feel like they have achieved something and they can laugh at others for not being cool like them, i don't really mind much if they say it once or twice, i am not a person who easily gets offended, jokes are fine, but doing this repeatedly hurts me.

They say things like, "You are bald, you will not get married", if i make a mistake, they're like, "That's why you're single".. the other day, one colleague of mine, said "You will get an aunty, not a girl, because you look like an uncle" and laughed, wtf, i know what i look like, just don't tell me again and again, we're all gonna be uncles anyways, and i can't even confront them, because they say it while laughing as if they're joking and if i confront them, they will be like, oh he is such a child, he can't take a joke, and make even more fun of me.. but in reality they're being childish, by talking about these superficial things even after being in their 30s.

My sister lives in pune and works. My office is also in pune but luckily I have wfh so I stay in my hometown . Last week there was some meeting I had to attend so I came to pune for that purpose. After the meeting I decided to stay a few days in pune and I am currently in pune.

Last saturday I went clubbing with my sister and her 2 friends (both females). I was not much in mood to party so I stayed on our table most of the times. In the dance floor where my sister and her friends were dancing other people were also there so its natural others might join them too which happened. It was not just random girls but guys too. One of the guys I noticed was trying to dance with my sister mostly. When she came back to the table I was at for some water I kind of sarcastically joked about her bf getting angry if he saw him dancing with a random guy. She replied that they were enjoying and just dancing and told me "couple dance thodi kar rahe hai" , which was true. Then she went back to dance. During the dance the guy did try to get touchy which my sister didn't allow and to anyone who watched them would look like friends dancing , not a couple dancing so I thought she set boundaries and the guy respects them.

Then after a while they went to the bar to get some shots and while coming back the guy had his hand on her waist and being a brother guys might understand I felt angry on her . Then back to dance floor the guy tried to get touchy again but she didn't let him. So I thought maybe that one time the guy took advantage and grabbed her by the waist while walking back from the bar. Everything goes ok and almost the end of the night. I see this guy take out his phone and give it to my sister and then her phone rings which was kept beside me on the table and I was shocked and confused to as why she would give her number to a random guy. The night ends the guy leaves and we leave. I didnt say anything to her that night but next morning I asked her about it.

She tells me the guy kept insisting on sharing contacts and she was just having fun dancing with him so just gave her number just for the sake of it. Ok I guess, is what I thought. I found out on tuesday that not only did she save his number but had a few calls with him too. Now when I asked her about it she said that you can't trust anyone seeing how people have been acting all over the news so she is mellowing the convo out and then will cut connections with him. Now I asked her if her bf knows and she told me that he would get angry and it will cause them to fight and stuff so she has not told him and if I was a girl I would have understood and I shouldn't tell her bf about it. Okey.

Now when I think about it she does make sense like the guy called her on the spot to check if its her number or not and they also looked over at my table where her phone was . Also seeing how weird people are nowdays that they might do serious stuff , her talking with him before mellowing things out seems reasonable . Infact one of my friends broke up with her bf like that where she started acting boring while talking and slowly saying she is busy busy until the guy didn't care much then they broke up so I guess my sister might be doing something similar.

So I am just wondering do I tell her bf or let her take care of it? Tbh I do have doubts that she is telling the truth. Afterall its has been 10 years she has been with her bf and both the families know. They are going to get engaged too this winter so I feel like they are at this point in their relationship that she can tell him about it. But at the same time people are different and maybe they have different dynamics etc etc. So what do I do? Tell her bf or let her take care of it on her own?

TL;DR: My sister (in a 10-year relationship and getting engaged this winter) met a random guy while clubbing. They danced, she rejected his attempts to get too touchy, but she still gave him her number after he insisted. I later found out she saved his contact and had a few calls with him. She says she's only talking to him to slowly cut him off because she's worried about how some people react to outright rejection, and she hasn't told her boyfriend because she thinks it'll just cause a fight. I'm not sure if I believe her explanation. Do I trust her to handle it, or do I tell her boyfriend?

I am dating a woman for the past couple of months, but can't help feeling insecure and doubting myself which is making me reconsider this relationship.
She's a very attractive, fit, and pretty woman. She's not only that, but has a lot of interesting hobbies, great communication skills, and there's a pull like where ever she goes she has some kind of pull or influence.

She, of course, gets a lot of attention everywhere and it makes me question myself. I, on the other hand, am not active at all and no magnetic pull like hers so that people just respect you and bow down to you. I feel like everybody must be questioning why is this girl dating this guy whenever we go out.

She doesn't entertain any of the attention in any way, but it still makes me question myself. I am reconsidering the relationship solely because of this. I haven't yet discussed this with her, she gives me reassurance by herself always and it feels it's too much to always ask if I am enough.

I need opinions on this.

Ok so like the title says..

I had been home as my parents told that there is a match and yeah on Sunday they visited my home and my parents had decorated my whole house... Variety of food and stuff..

Ok understandable..

Then these people come... Have food.. they call me.

K went there sat infront of their whole family (6) ppl..

Some basic Q&A and then again when I went into my room the ladies of that family just approached me and said they wanted to talk in person to which my fam allowed.. they came and asked me again the same basic q&a and saw my hands, feet and hair... And she kept some money in my hand and they say there for around 2 hours and chit chatted with my family...

Before going they clicked my pictures alot of them to which my family agreed as well...

No back to present my get a call from my mom saying.. " what is ur linkedin pfp? Have u posted ur pic thete with glasses"

I said yes.. it looks abit professional so I have posted it what's so wrong in it?

My mom said " those people rejected you coz of ur linkedin profile picture, they said the girl has glasses and she looks abit brown in it "

And I'm still soooo furious and disguisted coz what kinda reason is this??? They sat with me for hours... Tab unko nai dikha?? And 1 saal purana linkedin pfp se they say she looks brown???

I mean i don't mind rejection but atleast have the balls to give the correct reason.. coz wtf??? Is this normal is AM scene??

So I don't wanna bore you guys but am just looking for some advice on a friendship, i think that has lasted its course. And also in a way, i dunno what to do, but it's just random thoughts you have to go through.

So long story short, I met this friend of mine back in 2020, through mutual friends and well we kinda hit it off, and things were good. Didn't think much at the time but the tell tale signs were high that she was immoral person but as we are, I just ignored those.

We started to talk, shared socials and well, things were okey, but as we started to get close, the emotional Intimacy was good, and well the more she started being vulnerable with me, the more I understood why she is the way she is and also how she is. And well we got even closer, we did meet, few times, went for movies, went for lunches and all that.

And well the more she shared her past, which wasn't easy on her, the more a soft corner for her began and well now fast forwarding to this last year.

I kinda lost respect for her cause during one of our conversation I got to know, how she thinks and doesn't think twice before hurting someone. And that really came out to be true.

So back in September, august last year she met a guy, and I was happy for her that alright after her toxic ex, she has someone, but a month or two later she told me that guy has a girlfriend and well as any sensible person I told her to move away, but things got worst when she kinda decided to sleep with him and well, okey i understand people make mistakes but she is treating that guy as her boyfriend, and well she continued to do it,till today, and well I dunno her friend circle is toxic as her I guess and someone told her to go on date with someome else to make him jealous cause he wasn't giving her the attention she wanted, and that's what she did, she went out with a guy whom she met on Hindge and well slept with him too, twice or thrice I got no clue.

And well just to test her, i distanced myself from her, for a month and well, i haven't gotten a text, nor a message from her making it abundantly clear that she doesn't care as much I do for her.

So just a little thing that, now I have lost respect for her, and she had shown me who she is and how she is cause, in way also she kinda had been lying to me for a long time, and that hurts too yk?

So guys what's your advice, how do I approach this without feeling guilty, cause I just miss who she was when I met her, and now she is changed person, but also instead of working on herself she is kinda just ruining her life which she is welcomed too. Just hurts losing a friend but yea what's your advice, suggestion to do?

Thanks guys.

About five months ago, I met a girl on Reddit. We live in different states and have never met in real life. Our entire friendship has been through text, but we've talked almost every day since we met.

Early on, I opened up to her about someone from my past who had a huge impact on my life. I told her everything—how deeply I felt, how badly things ended, and how difficult it had been for me to move on. Because of that, I also told her something very clearly: if she ever felt herself getting emotionally attached to me, she should leave. I didn't want anyone to get hurt because I wasn't sure I was emotionally ready for another relationship.

A day ago, she told me that she has developed feelings for me and is getting attached.

Now I'm conflicted.

On one hand, I appreciate her honesty and care about her as a person. On the other hand, I don't know if I'm in a place where I can return those feelings or if I'm just afraid because of my past.

I don't want to lead her on, but I also don't want to push away someone who genuinely cares about me out of fear.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? If you were in my position, what would you do?

want to know how to make move and talk with my crush

context we were in same school till 12th she knows me i also know her but we never talked and it was like nothinng contact recently added her on insta and she did accept which was not expected and i conngraulate her for her neet result which were very good under 10 k and i am not as intelligent as her and nor much handsome idk why she added me despiite no talk because she is very secretive charmy but have few friends and dk how to extend convo now or talk to her

I'm 29M, was talking to 27F for last 2 months with intention to date and marry. We both had same values, same interests, similar thinking, and for whatever plans I had thought of personal and professional she fit in all of them perfectly. She was smart, funny, jolly. And I find girls who could be humorous and hold intellectual conversations really attractive. And she I thought was my soulmate. We had been talking online for for 1st month before meeting for the first time. She comes to mumbai for a week then goes back to her hometown. So when she came to mumbai, 1st day itself she met me. We had plan to go to social, watch a movie and then fine dine.

My issue started here (that's what I like to think). I got nervous because I had idealized our future together so much that I just wasn't myself. Our chemisty which was soo well, all the laughter and humor and intellectual talks...nothing clicked. And I could not be myself. She did sense that and pointed that out in first 15mins. Itself. Things start to normalize as the date went on but the momentum was lost. It was purely platonic date. No spark. And that's where I think things started to fall off for our relationship. She is a social butterfly and has lots of friends. So she always had excuse ready that she is talking to her friends. We used to talk on call everyay in our first month, but after my first meet, we did not talk much. She did not talk much. There were few calls where we talked a lot which made me believe that there is still hope, maybe she understood that 1 date is not enough to judge someone. She would talk to me but not take initiative to call me once after that first month. She would send me 3-4 reels a day...which i know is so low effort but made me believe that things are atleast fine. And then her time for mumbai was soon to come. I asked to make plans for our meetup and as I had feared, she unlike last time did not give me time for weekend. She only gave me only Thursday. All other days she had to meet her friends. I felt sad and I had job too, I would be free only after 9pm and we would get only 2-3 hrs together but I thought alright, i will be more confident this time around like how I usually am. But then When I mentioned that instead of going to cafe let's do build some experiences together, going bowling or gokarting or clubbing, she said she wanted to save energy for her girls nightout on friday and suggested if it's fine to not meet this time(which meant another month of online texting before meeting her again) and here I felt that our priorities are very different and how little she thought of me. I felt like a clingy guy who is begging for her attention. And instead of communicating that I felt sad about what you said, or demanded explanation of what is happening, where are both of us standing, I just sent a small text :

Thankyou for hint, I'm stopping now, let's not see each other anymore. Hope you find what you are looking for. Good bye, Take care.

And then I deleted her chats from whatsapp and Instagram, put timer on our future chats, unfollowed her and removed her from my followers. All within few minutes.

And when this happened I felt that was the right thing to do. But even when it's more than a month now since that incident happened. I wonder, what if? What if I communicated my troubles, because she did not stop talking to me. She just was putting bare minimum efforts. Maybe she thought that I was a good guy and did not find it in her to tell me off. What do you think? Did I do it right? I sincerely thought that it would take me longgg while before I find someone that good. But my boundary which I thought didn't exist got breached by her

Well, she's aware of her behavior but that doesn't make it any better. I don't know what to do anymore.

Six months ago I tried leaving her. I told her to block me because I couldn't handle the friendzone anymore. She did, but somehow she's back in my life now because of a stupid mistake I made. It feels like she's completely hijacked my mind. I know it's my fault for being weak.

I've read books about narcissism and watched tons of psychology videos to understand what's going on, but I still can't bring myself to actually leave. Leaving just doesn't feel like an option.

I don't even know if this is real love or limerence, but I believe it's love. Since I came back, things have shifted — we're out of the friendzone and she's accepted me more. She's done a few things she never did before. For example, she randomly said "don't mind me calling you bhai" (I even call my dad bhai), I told her I would mind, and she unsent the message right after I asked her to. Plus some other little things that felt out of character for her.

The problem is I'm always the one initiating conversations. She never does. It's been 5 days since I last messaged her and she hasn't reached out either. Her ego is massive — she even asked me why I can't just accept her ego as my own. I told her I'd only do that if she starts calling me "mine." She said she doesn't like when people tell her what to do, that she'll handle it her own way... and she kind of did.

I'm so confused. Should I swallow my ego and message her first again? Or is this just me being stuck in the same cycle?