r/PanicAttack • u/KittyComic3 • 23m ago
Panic is ruining my life
I just need to vent and tell my story. I’m so fed up dealing with panic attacks and anxiety.
I’ve been dealing with this since I was a teenager. Bad panic attacks, to the point I would call 911. Things calmed down a bit by the time I turned 18. Then when I was pregnant at 19, all hell broke loose and my anxiety/panic attacks escalated. I guess due to hormones and being pregnant. After I delivered, things slowly calmed down. I recall being panic attack free for about 10-12 years. I always have anxiety and am a very anxious person, but the actual panic attacks were not happening and I felt I had it under control and I could talk myself down if I felt one coming.
Then last year, almost exactly a year ago, everything changed. In May 2025 I had my tubes removed and an endometrial ablation. Everything was fine until July 2025 when I began experiencing palpitations. They just started one day and continued daily afterward. These palpitations triggered worsening anxiety and eventually the panic attacks returned with a vengeance. I figure the surgery caused more hormone issues, which in turn has worsened my anxiety and triggered the panic attacks again.
August 2025 I had the worst panic attack of my life that lasted over an hour. I made my husband drive me to the ER, which usually calms me down, but while there I continued to experience the panic attack. I struggled for months. The panic attacks created phobias, I was scared to leave the house, I didn’t want my husband to leave, he became my safe person and I always wanted him near or I’d panic. He couldn’t even go for an hour appointment without me freaking out. I would constantly worry about doing things or going places out of fear of having a panic attack.
I eventually got a bunch of tests completed (echo, ECG, halter, stress test) all came back normal, my palpitations were benign PVC and my heart was healthy. By about March 2026 the palpitations had seemingly disappeared. And my anxiety/panic attacks slowly were getting better. I still had difficulty going out or doing things, but it was slowly getting easier.
Fast forward to now. I found a lump in my neck that has been confirmed as a nodule on my thyroid. I have hypochondria and finding this out has significantly increased my anxiety and made things so much worse. I can feel myself regressing and everything all the progress I made seems like it’s gone.
Today I had to abruptly leave an appointment early because I had a full blown panic attack and felt trapped. I just wanted to go home. Now I’m scared to even go back to this appointment out of fear of having another panic attack. I hate that I’m like this. Panic disorder is the worst
Thank you for reading…