I'm now realizing just how absolutely screwed I actually am being in this relationship and allowing him to enter my world too deep and way too quickly. He had it in his head that he steps in and is immediately the MAN of the house - wanting to be the one handling certain things at home to help me get a job so we can begin building together.
Well, he paroled in later November and began working in December at Taco Bell..
He never got his GED over those 17.years nor.did.he pick up a trade..
He's totally dependent on my vehicle i-f I expect him to make moves and get to work I really have no choice.
Upon moving in I was promised he'd split the bills and hed be giving me 150.a week so I can get some clothing and go tanning and get my nails done.
Now, none of that is happening
He's not contributing - paid 3 bills total so far.
He ONLY has 2 bills to save for and pay yet it's me who paid it after it got turned off!!.
He's messing up my personal bills and my credit score because come to find out he's extremely irresponsible and does not know what the hell he's doing.
He thought they're working 27 hours a week which is fine. My parents have not been shy about lending US money and it's like he stands there with his hand out having no problem feeling no bad feelings about borrowing from them.
He's a home mechanic and promised me that he would do the upkeep and the fixing on my car that it needed. But, he's managed to do is put mileage on it that is already triple of what I was putting on it per year in the matter of 6 months
Everything that he does do that's the right thing is because I bitch or pushed him to do it and explain to why it should be done. He expects to be treated like a man and literally behaves like a toddler what I'm trying to communicate with him and it becomes a screaming match.
Mind fucking gaslighting and confusing me the ways that affect me mentally being around him and making me for sure I need to get away which is where the problem lies.
He is a stalker for sure. He's not going to go without a fight. I'm going to probably have to have him removed and he's not even supposed to be living here or I can live just the roof over my head.
Haven't even had money to go get my haircut and it has just been going out for 6 months.
I'm literally drowning every single day as it continues and it seems like there's no end insight except for me exiting the relationship.
What I haven't mentioned so far is the bigger problem and that is him and his anger issues. I grew up being around. An angry man who slammed things around and I was afraid of. Since being in prison and seeing the things that he saw and being treated how he was time and time again for 17 years it has changed him of course.
What that said I didn't sign up for this! Can we talk on the phone for almost 2 years straight and it never came out then it really just started a couple months ago. He can't handle the smallest of tests, if I asked him to repeat what he said he will flip the fuck out like it's a huge deal and I'm really bothering him or I'm stupid and he gets angry about everything.
Refusing to reward negative behavior I ended up on inviting him on a family vacation for the summer. There's no way I'm bringing him there's no way rewarding him he's going to sit home and think about the crap he doing and work while I'm gone and hopefully pay some bills or get parts for my car.
I won't even write in it at this point because we don't feel safe and it makes my anxiety go through the roof.
May is your hair is that I feel completely stuck. I do fear him when he is in heart broken mode or angry mode. I do fear what he's capable of I know what he's capable of because I know it's past in fall and I feel like I'm in a huge mess and I don't see a way out of it myself so I'm reaching out all day maybe somebody else has better ideas.