He said him and my mom had their doubts but I was ultimately cut in the end because "girls who have experienced both prefer circumcised". Somehow that was the most upsetting part of the reasoning. It makes me want nothing to do with him ever again.

Circumcision, or the ritual genital mutilation of children, is a crime against nature. No other animal is so cruel that they genitally mutilate their own offspring.

I’m not much of a spiritual or religious person, yet I would not be surprised if I discovered that demonic entities were feeding on the trauma caused by rituals mutilation.

Sometimes I wonder if global warming is a curse that the Earth has coughed up in order to cleanse itself of the abomination of desolation, of the mutilating and idiotic species that has invited so many dark entities to our planet.

The most violent act of resistance I can do is foreskin restoration, because it’s a cleansing ritual that gradually purifies me of the entities/egregores that feed on trauma, although at a glacial pace.

Years ago I wrote down garbled apocrypha that I heard in my head while high. While it’s possibly just nonsense, sometimes I’ll read it and find interpretations that are strangely relevant and disturbing. No true religion would have an accepting or neutral view of child mutilation, so in some strange way I trust this garbled apocrypha more than any “sacred scripture” drivel.

One reading of what I wrote is that a section contrasts two worlds in a cosmic war of good and evil: an alien world that resisted evil and our own world which lost the battle. This reading is even darker than the “Gaia cleansing itself” hypothesis but it’s another possibility I’ve considered. It’s the possibility that genital mutilation is the abomination of desolation, a horror that manifests when evil entities have already hijacked a species and made enough of them into hosts for the entities that it can destroy all life on that planet by using them to heat it to the point of sterilizing all life from the surface of their planet. Perhaps Venus was once a planet like Earth that was eliminated of life in a similar manner.

In second interpretation, forced genital mutilation is a symptom that the disease has become terminal, like a metastatic cancer.

On the other hand, according to the first and more optimistic interpretation, global warming is a fever through which the Earth (Gaia) cleanses itself of disease (humans). Thoughts?

Do you know the feeling that the person I am now is not really me?
It feels as though the life I would have lived if I had not undergone the surgery was the real life I was supposed to live. I feel a sense of longing for a life I never got to live. It’s so fucking contradictory.
My thoughts keep returning to the past, and in those thoughts, I keep saying that I cannot accept my present fate, living a life in which I constantly put my present self on trial.
So I decided to live without thinking about anything.

I've been doing a LOT of thinking the past few days...

What exactly is the foreskin? It's nothing more than the active mobile component of the penis' shaft. It's not its own entity and certainly isn't deserving of its own title. The penis is made of two primary sections: the glans and the shaft. There is no such thing as a foreskin. It's just part of the shaft. Foreskin IS the shaft. It's all once part. One seamless piece. Does the way I am explaining this make sense?

Let me back up... Firstly, it's not just "skin". It's specialized mobile shaft tissue essential for not only protecting the glans from the outside world, but increasing sexual sensation for the male (aiding sexual intercourse and impregnation). The entire idea of a foreskin and the word itself is a psychological operation with intent to make us believe it is its own thing when in reality its just the mobile section of the shaft. Even the word foreskin itself significantly reduces the impact of this section of the penis by reducing it to nothing more than rudimentary skin which it is NOT. It is NOT just "skin". When a male is "circumcised", they aren't removing the "foreskin", they are simply flaying his shaft. The language we are continuing to use is all by design to keep us losing this war and its working to our enemies' benefit.

There is no dotted line showing where to mutilate, and no two "circumcisions" are the same which further adds merit to my claim. However in theory you can remove the glans and shaft in their entirety and it would look the same across every person done to, but no two "circumcisions" look the same or are the same. Every male genital mutilation is unique in its appearance, function, sensitivity loss, etc.

The psyop doesn't end with the concept of a foreskin either. The entire narrative and dialogue around this critical issue has been crafted strategically by those that desire to exploit our suffering and cause us immense harm. We need to dramatically change the way we approach this issue. We need to hit the hard reset button and start from literal scratch because we are operating under the information, dialogue, and language provided to us by the enemy. We need to wake the fuck up.

Foreskin is not real. Circumcision is not a real medical procedure and never will be under any circumstance. For the clowns that want to claim phimosis or cancer or whatever else bullshit you regurgitate like the good cattle you are as an instance of it being required, we can agree that the mutilation of the penis' shaft may serve as a fix for these issues, but that does NOT make it a medical procedure. You're literally just being flayed. It's as simple as that.

The idea of consent being the primary concern with MGM is so fucking wildly wrong and such a shit position to attack from. In a scenario in which I was left unmutilated, I would have never, I repeat, NEVER voluntarily opted to have my penis mutilated. No, our issue is not consent. The issue is removing the ability for someone to reach their full human potential. The issue is someone wanting to control my sexuality. The issue is someone profiting from my suffering. Because I am mutilated, I can, by definition, never reach my full potential. I'm not trying to spread nihilism, but its the fucking truth. We delude ourselves with copes like restoration and foregen and dumb little court "wins" and fancy "research" but its all just bullshit. All of it. We operate under our enemy's rules and it needs to end. Thats how we win.

To summarize, all of us en masse need to shift our argument so drastically if we are to see any change in our lifetime. Nothing is working and it's because we are abiding by the rules, language, and narrative that has been set forth by the mutilators themselves. It's fucking bananas that I seem to be the ONLY person who has this deep understanding of this issue. Everything we are collectively doing is just blatantly wrong and laughably ineffective.

We need to reject the following:

• The word and notion of a "foreskin"
• The words and idea of being "circumcised" and "uncircumcised"
• The idea of "circumcision" being a medical procedure plus the word itself
• The word and concept of being "intact" (aka being NORMAL) + rejecting the terms "intactivism" and "intactivist" (but not the idea)
• Foreskin restoration/regeneration (I didn't tackle this issue in this post but both those words are shit descriptors and don't actually reflect what this process entails)
• The idea that consent is the issue
• The idea that we aren't entitled to real justice

We need to reject EVERYTHING our enemies have fed us.

We need to embrace being loud, relentless, and cut throat. For fuck sakes our penises were mutilated and here we are using the language of our enemies, infighting, and tone policing our own community. It's wild and it keeps me up at night. The enemies are winning and its because we abide by THEIR rules, THEIR language, and THEIR narrative.

Why?

P.S. Yes I'm fully aware that my forum circumcised.com is in direct conflict with what I've outlined in this post and it makes me look like a hypocrite. Firstly, I've come to these ideas rather recently months after the forum was created, and secondly, while I would love to operate under an alternative name that better aligns with my goals, either none are currently available or their owners are asking for $25K+ so I went with what I thought was best at the time and what I thought could enter the cultural zeitgeist the fastest. I'm planning on renaming the forum and doing a major overhaul when I've saved enough money to do so.

In the meantime, it's the best I could muster.

Anyone else like this? I hate the feeling of sadness and deep grief, frustration I feel. I know my life would have been so different. Having that skin would've been so life changing, I know it would have felt very very good and fun. No matter what happens to intact men, they always have all their pleasure and joy with them, through their life. I could still live another 60 years never experiencing what I was born with. I know that to restore is the best way, I do that, even if I really dislike it.

I feel shame and sadness, because I was completely cursed. My father is the one responsible for this, he took it all away, he ruined my sexual and psychological life when he did this. He ruined parts of me that will never come back. He made the deliberate decision to cut off parts of me. What's my foreskin got to do with him? If he was jealous, it isn't my issue. I have grown to hate the bastard, he has ruined my life, not just because of this, but this is the big reason. Where I am, the health service doesn't do circumcision. You have to request it, clinic shopping, and take your son there. My dad was happy to pay out of pocket for it. It's amazing how determined he was, driving very far with me to have it done to me.

My mum did try and stop it happening, she tells me after all these years. But she said he was a very nasty person and threatened to kidnap and take me away to his home country, along with taking her daughter away and her bank cards. He is quite a successful person, if you don't mind me sharing, very rich, owns a very nice place and vehicles, but an absolute bastard. A pathetic man

Hope he reads any of my posts and realises how heartbroken I am, although it makes no difference. He's not even a good or proper Muslim, eating pork, drinking beer... but yeah sure do something that doesn't affect you at all, just sacrifice me instead. Men around me are simply natural. There's an air of indifference to circumcision because it's just not a issue men have to think about here, in a large quantity of men. There was zero chance for me and others here to be intact, which is extremely unfair in the 21st century society. Who knows what I could have been, with all my penis, none of the adversity circumcision brings. I would have been a different person. My life would have been much, much better. Unfortunately my father took it all away. I lost relationship opportunities because of circumcision- i lost the chance to properly love and feel connection on a primal level. This can never be undone to a big extent. It is a crushing feeling. I'm completely heartbroken.

I’ve never been closer to it than I am rn I hate being here in this body, it’s becoming too much for me to handle and i just want to be free of it. It torture ms me every single day I just don’t know how much more of it I can take

This isn’t the usual type of post here, but I think it’s important to talk about. If you weren’t aware, the old Reddit layout is now inaccessible without an account, which means they’ll phase it out eventually. The new Reddit layout is, imo, complete garbage and it would suck enough to make many of us leave. The issue is that I can’t think of any other discussion forum about this topic besides bulletin, which hardly has any traffic and is strictly about restoration.

I couldn’t sleep after our conversation and I have been doing some additional reading about how circumcision affects young men and their parents. Again, I’m so sorry for the decision that we made to circumcise you without your consent as a baby. I’m sorry that it hurt you my little boy when it didn’t have to I didn’t know what I know now and . I’d give anything to have that decision again so that I could change what we did. all I ever wanted to do was protect you and care for you and my heart‘s broken for how this is affecting you in your life as an adult. Being a parent is a hard thing to do because you are making decisions from your heart and your mind and sometimes you don’t make the right decision that’s not an excuse. It’s just the way it is trying to raise a child and doing the best you can. I am on your side and I’m here for you. It breaks my heart to see you suffer and I think it would be a good idea for you to talk to a therapist for additional support.  Love you 

Mom

There’s no hope i will be deformed forever, and I will never stay recycle that I am in unless I die honestly I hope is soon

Please comment and help her out!

I’m from a non-circumcising country. What really fucks me up is that I had to find out about my circumcision by being humiliated on a Boy Scout camp. I was about 7-9years old.

One boy looked at my penis when I was peeing and then told EVERYONE that I was circumcised. I was then made fun of. I wasn’t really aware of circumcision before then. I only knew about it through an episode of South Park but I always thought… that’s not me me, I’m not Jewish.

It’s fucked up! Don’t parents think if they’re going to have a kids genitals altered they should AT THE VERY LEAST tell them?!?! Was I supposed to just walk through this world not knowing my penis didn’t look like everyone else’s?

FUCK.YOU.MUM.&.DAD!!!!

They’re all disgusting

I need someone to tell me how to deal with this. I've only been "in the know" for about 4 months now and its eating away at my sanity. Ive already started "restoration" because its something I can do. I know it won't be the same and it takes years, but its something I guess.

I've seen posts here from people that have been dealing with these thoughts for 10+ years, and that just seems impossible to me. I can't deal with this. I was a completely innocent, helpless, and healthy baby boy and they cut me for no reason. Literally no reason at all other than "its just what is done".

Now I have to live the rest of my life with my genitals being this way? Its such bullshit and it makes me so fucking angry. Seriously, what am I supposed to do? Go to therapy so someone who doesnt understand can gaslight me into being OK with it? "Forgive" my retarded and ignorant parents for cutting their son's genitals for literally no reason? Take SSRI's forever to numb myself to these thoughts and not care?

NOBODY, not the doctors, not my parents, gave it any thought. They didn't stop for one second to think "What if he doesn't want this?". You figure out later in life what was done to you against your will and don't like it? Too fucking bad, nothing you can do about it!

I'm seriously looking for help here. I need a way to deal with this.

It was a plastibell. I finally decided to ask my Mom about what method was used.
She didn't have the answer, but she did have a baby calendar of my first year of life.

4 days after my birth I received a "Circumcision checkup" and again 2 days later. Pus was forming on my wound.
And then a note 10 days after my birth "Circumcision ring fell off"

Boom. Plastibell.

I finally know.
My heart hurts. The rest of the calendar is full of so many loving things, first words, kisses, steps.

But it was documented, clear as day, like it was the most normal thing in the world:
"Device that removes half my son's penile tissue check-up"
"Infection from removing half my son's penile skin?"
"Device that removed half my son's penile tissue fell off"

It's a stain on an almost idealic childhood.

It's surreal. It breaks my heart how little common sense people have. How little my own parents have.

Why don't I have a frenulum?
Why are there four weird "hole scars" where the frenular delta should be?
Why me?

She questioned it before I was born, why I was going to lose half my skin, she even went to the library to read up on circumcision, and found very little. If I was born just a little bit later, with the internet. I would have been saved.

But instead she asked her brothers and my father.
They are golems, cattle in a true sense of the word.
They "Had no problem with it" and so they thought I should have it as well.
No empathy, no thought, no questioning.
I don't talk to my Uncles, I haven't in years. I hope they rot. Idiots.

My Father is very autistic I've come to learn, I pity him more than anything. I'm just glad I didn't inherit it, maybe I have.

My Mother is like most women and just went along with what was popular.

I just feel so empty. My heart hurts.
This is real. I am actually a male on Earth where 37% of Men will never get to experience sex or masturbation as its meant to be, and I lucked out and I'm one of them.

There are men out there casually experiencing pleasure I will never be capable of.
My scarline is the most sensitive part of my penis, it's only more proof of what was truly robbed off of me.
Tied off. Cut off. Rotted off. Necrosised off.

Never to be enjoyed, snuffed out at days old.
It's insane. It's evil. It's not fair.
Stuck with glans so dry they have deep vertical cracks in the tissue, that will never heal or fill.
When the should have been as smooth as the inside of my cheek.

Things designed to be internal 99% of the time forced to be external 100% of the time. IDIOTS.

Mutilated, and called routine.
I hate this so fucking much, I'm so fucking sad.
All that's left of me is envy and pain.

Not having to worry about any discomfort while drying off or putting on clothes
Not needing lubrication
Not being pinched
Not having a burn victim filleted looking dick
Being able to hold at the top not the bottom
Easily being able to catch ejaculation without making a mess
The first time i masturbated after i was genuinely shocked by how little i felt and was mad ( fully uninfluenced into thinking it would feel worse btw)
I have forgotten how it feels and will never know again..

I hate as a joke like it did really fuck with me what happened? It just appears something I like or someone I like mixed joke about it., like I got hit back to back this week with creators, using it as a joke and whenever it happens it just it hurts. I’m on a fucking mental breakdown and shaking as I’m writing this and I just I hate this I can’t take this anymore i just this shit was done to me. I hate that I can’t escape it. I can’t even fucking watch entertainment without being shoved in my face fucking hate this.

In anti-circumcision spaces, the framing almost exclusively activism, it's literally in the name "IntACTIVISM". The exact same is true is traditional MRA spaces. It's also literally in the name, men's rights ACTIVISTS.

For some reason, men's issues tend to center exclusively around activism. And this isn't the case at all for other social justice issues, both in name and behavior. Feminism isn't an activist framework, neither is anti-racism. And activism as a framework for progress, which is enforced only for men's issues, is a failed-victim negative framework.

Activism requires the activist to self-sacrifice, to take on a burden, to martyr himself. Activism asks something FROM it's participants. Activism focuses OUTWARD, how do we "convince" the outsiders?

Social Justice gives something TO it's participants. Justice focuses INWARD, how do we support our victims? It empowers them, gives them space, validates them.  

These goals are often in-conflict, they don't work together. For example, the average activist might say something like "don't say anything too extreme, you might scare people away". This is a common sentiment in Intactivism. 

But if we look through the lens of any other issue, it's absurd. Would anti-racists says "don't say anything too extreme, you might scare the racists away". Of course not. It's absurd. It's victim negative and requires victims to dumb down their message to appease enemies. Social Justice Movements would never do this, they'd empower their victim group not silence them.  

Only in Intactivism and for men's issues do we silence victims and dumb down our message to appease our enemies. That's the failing of Activism as a framework. It stands in the way of justice. And it stands in the way of grief. Victims have been through enough, why do we ask things from them instead of give things to them?

The rape survivor woman isn't tasked with becoming an anti-rape advocate. She doesn't go post about her suffering on a rape survivor sub just to be told "go advocate for policies that reduce rape, making a difference will make you feel better". Its absurd. She would be supported, and if the feminist movement got involved with her at all, it would be to empower her. To tell her that her voice matters. To tell her its not her fault and that it was systemic oppression. The validate her distrust of the world and of men. To blame the oppressor class, at the expense of the oppressors and to her benefit. But for circumcision, we tell victims to suck it up and contribute to activism because it will "make them feel better". Something is ass-backwards about how we operate.

it was like heavy anxiety that the part is gone forever.that i am not going to get it back. it sents chill down my body. When i ejaculate i miss my forreskin yes i did it for medical reason. But i think it was the most stupid decision i take. I had some religious obsessions as well. That also influenced me to opt for circumcision where some removal of frenlum is only required.. shitt i lost it and i will never get it. now everyone insie my family tease me for acting like a needy person. I had suicidal ideations from time to time. I really think about going back to use of nicotiine. Basically what ia m having is panic attacks followeed by ejaculation. where i get chills when realising the fact tht i cant have a complete orgasm ever in my life. i feel crazy and breathless, i hate this world for influencing me to do this. and it was my decision so i cant blame it on anybody. i came to a level that i cant go through life without therapy.. even therapy sucks because i know i need to pay them ... i am completely ruined forever

I can’t even express how I feel here without someone trying to tell me how to feel about being violated like this. It’s painful and it’s just proves that no one really gives a fuck, especially intact guys why are they even allowed in the first place I don’t get it seeing the tag is enough to send me into a spiral but add on reactions like this. It’s just infinitely worse and these people are so common with their reactions to this. It’s horrific.

Does anyone know of a subreddit for victims of genital surgeries performed during childhood? I’m not just referring to circumcision, but to any such surgery, whether for men or women. It leaves a lasting trauma, regardless of gender.

I know I don't.