I just feel like we’re falling behind. All our friends are either OAD or have a perfect 2 year gap between all their kids. It took us 22 months to conceive #1, and we have MFI but subfertility (some sperm). I feel like my poor husband has been on every supplement/ Mucinex/ diet under the sun, it’s not lifestyle related. I guess we’re going to move on to IUI and I’m just exhausted.

Hey guys. Sorry - I know a bit self-centred to have 2 posts in one week.

After spotting on dpo12 I had a very unexpected BFP at dpo13. Still spotting very mildly. Dpo15 has rolled around and of course I’m now barely positive.

I’m sat here waiting on a blood bHCG but I am pretty sure I’m about to find out I’ve had a chemical pregnancy. I’ve had one of these before, before I had my daughter. And of course I’m on holiday, for maximum miserable-factor.

This is my 10th cycle of trying and I am so frustrated this is the end result. There’s no justice!

Anyway - just searching for positive success stories after a chemical pregnancy. Thanks all xxx

Just to update the b-HCG came back so low as to be negative - so definitely a CP. Down with this sort of thing!

I’ve been TTC since April, I know it’s not that long but this cycle i felt really confident at the start. I just felt like I’m pregnant in the TWW - I experienced some symptoms such as sore breasts, tiredness etc but as AF comes closer my confidence has dropped massively! Has anyone else experienced this? I’m not sure if i’m preparing myself for bad news or my body just knows.

One of my friends children told her there is a baby in someone’s belly which she is taking as a good sign for me but i’m really not sure.

I don’t want to add pressure to the situation worrying about timescales and upcoming events and trying to plan around that because that’s not how life goes but this rollercoaster is crazy and I just hope for my BFP

My first pregnancy I got pregnant on the first try. I kind of assumed that would happen again, but I just got my period so obviously it didn’t.

Any success stories of getting pregnant 2nd or 3rd month of TTC?

I know I shouldn’t complain about it not happening right away, I’m just feeling more down than I expected to today.

I just learned of the 4th (!!!) friend who's pregnant and due this year while I have lost not one but two pregnancies since last November.

this particular friend has a child the same age as my son and with them both turning 4 in a few days, I was already so vulnerable with the age gap and everything because we've been trying for a year now and the losses have been so traumatic, especially the last one 3 weeks ago at 15 weeks... and then 💥 here's another woman who just gets to be pregnant happily with her healthy baby just like she planned while I want to break down and cry because she seems to get everything I wanted and I am being punished by having to see it all unfold.

I know this is incredibly bitter and selfish of me. I don't want to be this person. but I also really really really just wanted my baby. either the one that would have been due in June or the one due in December. why did I have to lose them both when others get to keep theirs? I feel like I'm trying to climb this huge mountain because there's the most precious thing waiting for me at the top but every time I get ready, the mountain moves away 100 miles from me 💔💔💔

Looking for insight on irregular cycles!

I have a 9 month old baby.
It is currently late July and I stopped breastfeeding in late February of this year and have only had 1 natural cycle since (1 week after completing weaning). I have been on 2 rounds of 10 days of Provera to induce bleeds since. My second cycle on Provera was way closer to how my cycles were pre pregnancy and my withdrawal bleed started the day after my last Provera dose.

We are wanting to get pregnant again soon.

Anyone with similar experience?

Have you had success on letrozole?

All of my lab work/hormone panel came back normal!

Hello! I had a question about bbt changes over time. Did anyone notice a shift in their overall bbt patterns over time?

A couple of years ago when I was tracking, used to average 97.3-97.6 in my follicular phase and 97.99-98.40 in my luteal phase.

Now I’m usually averaging 96.70-97.20 in my luteal and 97.40-97.90.

Anyone else notice a change like this? Or does anyone have insights on if my new normal is too low? Thanks!

We have been trying for a few months which I know isn’t long but my husband wasn't on meds with our first two babies so I never really thought about how it could affect our ability to conceive.

He is taking hydrocodone for a chronic pain condition that we're waiting on a surgery to improve his quality of life. It's not much, only one pill per day so 10mg. Has anyone conceived and delivered a healthy baby with a husband on this med? A quick Google search shows that hydrocodone "significantly" impacts male fertility which has me concerned, although it suggests that maybe that's for men taking multiple pills per day?

A weekly dedicated space for members who have been trying for another for 12 or more months, experiencing infertility. Talk of treatment, testing/diagnosis, or tough feelings are welcome here. While this is a safe space to vent, please consider how other long haulers in different circumstances may feel about your words.

This thread is primarily for current long-haulers to connect with, vent to, and support each other. We ask that anyone else (including TFA grads and those whose current round of TTC has been less than 12 months) participate only to answer questions where your personal experience is relevant - for example, if someone asks about the side effects of a fertility treatment you have tried. For more general support, sympathy, and finger-crossing, in this thread, if you have not currently been trying for at least 12 months, please stick to a quiet upvote.

This thread is not meant to limit discussion only to this thread. Discussion of long haul issues is always welcome in the Daily Chat.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Yesterday, some guests came to our home. They have a very cute 6-month-old baby. God bless her.
She was sleeping on my 6-year-old son’s bed, and seeing her sleep there brought out all his emotions. He became adamant about keeping her and making her our little baby. When the guests finally left, he just kept crying and saying that he doesn’t have a baby while all his friends do, and that God never listens to him.
So my question is: during such situations, what do you tell your child to make them feel better? Because saying, “We’ll get one soon,” clearly didn’t work for us.

This morning I had noticed some spotting, which is VERY unusual for me at this dpo. I believe I am 5dpo but there's a chance I am 6dpo and I normally have a 14 day Luteal phase and dont have ovulation spotting. Could this be implantation bleeding? Or a sign of hormonal imbalance?

Hi all,

Just a whinge really. Coming to the end of my 10th failed cycle and I am feeling so drained, tired and depressed. I know it’s lucky that no problems have been picked up so far but the reality is that it’s just totally maddening. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!

I know in myself there is something clearly wrong. We are starting IVF in September and I just can’t believe it’s come to this. In the meantime I am *surrounded* by friends, acquaintances etc getting pregnant at the drop of a hat. IT’S NOT FAIR! I’ve done nothing to deserve this etc etc etc. In fact I’m killing myself over here, between OPKs, supplements, pessaries, blood tests, ultrasounds, acupuncture & therapy sessions…

Anyway just a scream into the void really. I’m sure lots of you can empathise & understand xx

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

My husband and I just started trying for our second.

I fully didn't expect it to happen after one cycle like it did with our first, but when my period was late, I was shocked, and now I've had 4 negative tests and my period is NINE days late. The only time I have ever been more than 2 days late was with my first.

It feels like my body is taunting me.

I really wanted to avoid a winter postpartum and have a baby in the spring, but now it feels like everything is going to be thrown off because I don't know when to check for ovulation.

I have no idea why I'm suddenly thrown off my normal cycle, and now I don't know if I want my period to come or just enjoy a month without it.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Hi friends, I could use some advice as I am super confused. I used OPKs to track ovulation this cycle and got my first positive on CD 12. The test was still positive the next day, CD 13. Did BD both of those days and hopefully got O-1 plus O day. This was a little early for me, as usually I get the first positive OPK around CD 13 or 14 and then my period will begin about 13-14 days later (27/28 day cycles). This time around a period would have been expected at CD 25 or 26... But now it's CD 27 and still nothing. I tested this morning (FMU was an invalid result so tested again next time I went to the bathroom) and got a BFN. I know ovulation day can vary a lot but I thought the luteal phase between ovulation and menstruation was supposed to be more consistent? Is it possible the OPKs were incorrect or my math is off somehow?

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Note: Discussion of BFPs / ongoing pregnancies is allowed and encouraged in this thread!

A dedicated space for TFA grads to check in and keep their TFA friends updated on their journey to #2+!

If you're looking for more discussion, please head over to the gradsofTFA subreddit as well. It's a private subreddit so you can send a modmail using desktop or you can directly message moderators DreamsofCheesecake or youcango-now to be added.

Officially back to trying! We had our son in April of 2025, he was conceived after 4/5mo of trying. As of this week we have officially tried for our first cycle. So much anxiety around doing this again - but I’m excited for the end product 😂

Here’s to #2 in 2027 🤞🏼

We conceived our first very quickly, but we’ve since been diagnosed with male factor infertility and had to move to IVF in hope of another.

Our first child is my only pregnancy, no losses, so I was kind of naively thinking that since I’ve been pregnant before once we sorted the sperm issue… boom, pregnant.

Today we found out that our first embryo transfer failed. It was a high grade, euploid embryo, everything leading up to the transfer looked good…. So now I’m spiralling. After years of nothing but negative tests I really thought we had moved on from being stuck there.

We’re fortunate that we have more embryos to try so we can give it another go, but I’m just hoping to hear from anyone else who ended up doing ivf for a second (or more) child- how many transfers did it take?

Edit:

Thank you everyone. It’s not been the birthday I hoped for (yep, really didn’t think through the timing of possible bad news from this FET)

I’ve mainly been in the main IVF sub but I’ll give the IVF positivity sub a try. I always feel a bit awkward in some of the infertility spaces because obviously there are lots of people trying to have their first child and we’re very lucky to have our daughter, but it’s hard not being able (so far) to have the family we want.

Also, a unique quirk of secondary infertility is that I have lots of friends and acquaintances through being pregnant/ a parent who are all people who were able to conceive their first child, and now have all gone on to have one (or even two!) more in the time we’ve been trying. There was a time where it felt like every week I’d see someone I knew from baby classes etc either heavily pregnant or with their new baby and it was just gut wrenching.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

​I know for sure that I want to expand our family, and I've decided I'm ready to start trying for another baby...already started in fact 😅 but as the reality sets in, a lot of normal anxieties are creeping up.

​I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by a few things:

​The age gap/energy levels: My 1.5-year-old is a beautiful handful, and the thought of navigating the toddler stage with a newborn makes me anxious.

​Physical readiness: I'm not quite where I want to feel physically in terms of strength and energy before heading into another pregnancy.

​Balancing acts: I homeschool my oldest (8 y/o), and trying to envision how to manage daily lessons, a toddler, and a newborn feels like a massive puzzle.

​Pregnancy anxiety: My first pregnancy and birth experience were wonderful, but because of that, I find myself worrying that the next one might be completely different.

​Part of me is saying, "Just wait for a 'better' time when life is calmer and you feel physically stronger." But the more realistic part of me knows there is no such thing as the perfect time—there will always be a project, a transition, or a reason to hesitate.

​For those who jumped into the transition from two to three kids (or managed a similar age gap while homeschooling/working), how did you quiet the anxieties and make the leap? I'd love some reassurance or practical encouragement!