I'm serious. You look at doctor's offices, cop phootage, how people act on the internet, how your coworkers act at every job you've been to, how every roomate you've had acts, how your family acts, how people act in school classrooms, how every customer acts at work, people putting graffiti, people on the street late at night, every story throughout history, duels to the death over nothing.... is humanity largely comprised of like batshit insane people? is it like 30%~?
Edit:
Last night I was listening to a story about losing your mind. It was so symetrical. So fulfilling. So perfect. Every setup had a payoff, and everything, every beat, every detail of the story, was integral to the web. It was my favorite story, because the writing itself, the structure of it, was so beautiful. So I started telling my partner who was listening to the story with me. It reminded me, and i said as much, of principles of design. The colors, contrasting, fighting, clashing, flowing, going together, smooth, sharp. The groups of small things with a gap, and groups of big things. Bubbles in cartoons, ceramic animal figures being laid out to an invisible specification in my dad's back yard. Patterns on a fursona. There is a form. An underlying principle. Something all of this points to. a perfection, a beauty, a payoff to every question. I saw this when i was on mushrooms. I saw the payoff. It was god. And she loves us.
My partner said "you're crazy." i said "what?" and she said "you are completely insane. You never make any sense." I think she's right.
Insanity is so prolific because its so tempting. Insanity is packing everything up and tying the loose ends together with an erroneous narrative you make up yourself, or endlessly pursuing something to tie to the ends when your way of putting together the puzzle pieces doesn't complete the puzzle, or just being content leaving one side unfinished in favor of having as many pieces put together as possible. That's why genius is so close to madness. Or maybe i'm just making things up to satisfy my need for the world to be simple. again right now.
I've decided to stop using screens, and doing other things that make me feel less grounded. Focus on reading, playing music, and interacting with other people. It helps me.
Thank you for your comments.