I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately and I wonder if anyone else feels the same.
Years ago if you wanted something you actually had to want it. You’d drive to the mall, walk through the store, hope they had your size or color, wait in line, pull out your wallet, count your cash or swipe your card, then drive all the way home with it....
Now I can be laying in bed at 11:30 at night, see something on TikTok, tap Buy Now, use Face ID, and it’s done in maybe 10 seconds. I don’t even have to know my card number anymore because every app already has it saved.
It feels like every little bit of friction that used to make you stop and think has slowly disappeared.
I’m not saying shopping is bad because obviously we all have things we need to buy. I just wonder if removing all those tiny pauses has made it way easier to buy things we never would’ve bought before.

Lmao. Last weekend i needed some party supplies, so i went into that popular craft store that everyone knows (not the one run by the religious zealot, the other one)---- and I'm gobbsmacked by all the Summerween garbage. Like we lost the plot. This trend was for Halloween lovers who wanted a reason to use their CURRENT decorations more than once a year (similar to the Xmas in July folks). Why am i seeing skeletons eating ice cream and ghosts in suitsuits sipping drinks out of pineapples?

And not two seconds ago Reddit showcased an ad for a "Black Friday sale in July".
Like are we okay as a society?

This is my first time posting on here. I recently got myself into almost two thousand dollars of consumer debt over the past couple weeks and I've never been on a bigger binge or shopping spree before. My $200 purchase last night of scrapbook supplies was definitely an oh crap moment. It genuinely felt like a hangover or that morning after eating a whole bag of hot cheetos and that waddling over to the toilet to deal with the consequences of a $7 bag of red40. Has anyone going on a spree before and then scrambled to sell or donate their possessions to try and makeup for the loss? I've never considered myself a shopping addict until recently, but it's one of those few things that makes me happy as a solo parent ​during deployment season. Not to mentioned I get huge feelings of missing out if I don't buy stuff. A lot of the things I got are vintage so if I don't buy them right away I lose my chance at something I really like or items that sell out quickly, and sometimes don't get restocked. I'm not really sure how to navigate this constant fomo and loneliness.

I have a recovering shopping addiction. I've been doing much much better. I never got myself into so much trouble that I've spent tens of thousands of dollars of credit card debt, but I've spent enough that I have plenty of clothing that I don't need. Particularly lounging clothing. I love certain yoga and athleisure brands, and honestly I'm a huge homebody so I have tons of outfit options to choose from. I really don't go out that much so I honestly don't really buy nice pants or skirts or jeans all that often anymore after covid. I wear scrubs at work and then I come home and immediately change into pajamas or lounge clothing.. I have so much that I honestly don't even wear all the sweaters and sweatpants that I have.

I know I should probably just donate some of the nicer quality ones since they'll be more likely to be used or I can put up some free stuff on OfferUp, but it's so hard to just Purge the closet. I can definitely Purge it based on the way I wear the clothing and what I haven't worn so I think the things that I just don't really use I'm comfortable getting rid of but it's definitely hurts. What do you guys do to get over this type of feeling of guilt that I spent money on it not too long ago or am now just getting rid of it or the dreaded what if I need it? Thanks for any advice

Hi everyone! I’m dealing with an intense case of non buyers remorse. I’ve been wedding guest dress shopping and I had a silk Staud dress worth $700 I was eyeing on eBay listed for only $20 (albeit stained and snagged, but certainly cleanable/repairable with dry cleaning). Just as I was about to purchase, it was bought by someone else. It’s now been a few days and I’m dealing with some intense regret and am obsessively checking other websites for the dress. I can’t stop thinking about how I should’ve bought it, it would’ve been perfect, and how I won’t find another of that exact dress for that price. Does anyone have any advice for how to get out of this spiral? TIA!

Have started getting back into art. Got a mixed media pad, erasable colored pencils, soft pastels, a set of sketching pencils, and charcoal. Have almost started going down the rabbit hole of getting more supplies to recreate Van Gogh-like art, but resisted today. I went to the library and got some books that will hopefully teach me to more skillfully use that I have instead of buying more things.

Sounds childish to post about it but I’m kinda proud of myself not gonna lie.

I am making this post to hold myself accountable. I was doing well on not spending for a while, but then my anxiety got bad for a bit and I went on a shopping bender. I am really trying to be better. I've deleted all shopping apps from my phone, and removed card info from my apps. I am beginning to compile a wishlist of more expensive, quality items that I want and will get lots of use out of. I am so tired of buying cheap shit just to buy it, instead of really thinking through high quality items. I am going to try and have as many no/low spend days as possible, while saving up for these items:

- digital camera

- flat top griddle pan for my bbq (cooking is my fav hobby and i will get so much use of this)

- vanilla sex perfume by tom ford

This subreddit has been such a great help for me. Words of encouragement would be great! Hang in there my friends

I (30F) recently called the sites customer service and asked them to send me a document showing how much money I’ve spent since I created my account about 10 years ago.

The answer was a little over $30,000.

That’s really really bad.

That’s our budget for our entire wedding that we’re planing.

I’ve tried methods in the past like deleting the app and my payment methods so it’s more work when I want to buy something. I even downloaded a parental control thing on my phone and computers to block me from going to the website. But after just a few days, I always find a way around it. Even if I delete my whole account, I’ll just easily make a new one.

Since cold turkey isn’t working, I have a new plan.

I asked my fiancé if he would be willing to take full control of my account so that I have to discuss it with him anytime I want to order something.

He’ll change the password and not tell me what it is and we’ll change all account recovery methods to his phone number, email, Authenticator app, etc.

We agreed on at least 3 months of this to break my bad habit.

Wish me luck guys.

I am a 27 y/o (m) and am tired of running in circles with my addiction. It has driven me several thousands of dollars into debt and it has caused serious damage to my relationships with my wife.

Due to my upbringing I wasn’t really taught any habit building strategies and didn’t figure some things out till I was out of the house.

One of the things I haven’t been able to get a grip on is money. It’s usually the small things like a thing or two from the vending machine or a drink at the gas station. Unfortunately I have severe anxiety and major depressive disorder. It’s relatively managed, but not entirely. Due to big situations (not related to this problem just some big changes happening) I have been more prone lately. My anxiety attacks range from chest pain to full on not remembering what I do during them. These are also the times of my greatest weakness. I will buy things I want with a bigger price tag. Concert tix, video games, and the worst of all micro transactions in said games.

It’s exhausting having to explain that I yet again messed up to my wife. She does so much to help and I just throw it away in favor of stupid crap every time.

I am in therapy but does anyone have any suggestions on how to remove myself from the things that help facilitate the spending when I am in such an aggravated state?

I‘m 32 and have just recently realised that my own shopping addiction came directly from my parents while I have admitted that I have a problem and trying to overcome it but my parents are adamant that Im just acting poor and need to live a little. They think that me not constantly buying stuff is me depriving myself of a good comfortable luxurious life.. they are not rich nor poor maybe a step above poor. Every conversation with them about this topic turns into a big argument, I just don’t know how to make them understand and overcome this.. they have had troubled life so I get that shopping gives them instant dopamine hits to feel good and get through the day but our house has sooooo much stuff.. there is not enough room to breathe even though we have a big house but its full of stuff everywhere..my dad has 3 cars one for each type of occasion which is excessive and my mom buys multiple of everything, multiples of clothes, bags, shoes, utensils, literally everything. They worked so hard for this money and seeing them waste it like this feels painful to watch

So I have 4 amazing kiddos. They're literally the neatest kids out there. In just realizing my own shopping addiction a month-ish almost ago, I'm realizing that they may have picked up some of this via osmosis/proximity.

They've had allowances and for the most part, they spend them. All except for my youngest, who is like a dragon and hordes wealth. Any time we've been in a financially dicey situation, he's offered to help, and we've always told him no and to hold onto it for something he really wants. So he's been really good about just not spending it. My kiddo just barely older than him also hoards his money thankfully, but mostly because he forgets he has it.

My eldest two though, they tend to spend it. My second oldest spends all of his on whatever food he wants or a video game. My eldest will just splurge on his brothers because he likes seeing them happy and has no idea what to spend it on for himself. His behavior is the closest to mine, because a lot of what's gotten me into this is spending thousands of dollars on them, my husband, and our roommate for birthdays and stuff because I love seeing them happy.

My eldest two are getting jobs soon (16M,17M) and I'm realizing...I don't actually know how to teach them to be financially responsible Beyond just imparting to stay away from Klarna/Affirm, pay your bills before you spend money on anything else...I don't know what to teach them or what resources are out there to help for teenagers learning fiscal responsibility for the first time.

They've never had to really see the effects of my shopping addiction because I've always made sure that what I've screwed up is "within budget". So we've never had utilities cut off, and there's always food on the table. There's just literally nothing for anything else. And when an "anything else" pops up, it's always been covered with Klarna, Affirm, or me asking a friend if they need any website or art work done, or selling a possession of mine like an old cosplay I used to do contests in.

TL;DR: How do I teach my kiddos to be fiscally responsible when it's something I was never taught myself?

Hoping this reaches the right crowd!! I love to online shop and recently discovered my local shelters’ wishlists. I know I don’t need anything more, however, I absolutely still have the online shopping thrill. Thought maybe this could help others by posting the suggestion.

Recently I’ve been obsessed with buying concert tickets. Some of them aren’t bands that I listen to but I just enjoy looking forward to them and when they are over I just want that bit of dopamine. I buy them I guess because I keep thinking “this will be an amazing memory” or “this might be their last concert” or just random excuses to buy them. I’ve lost money that I could spend on college and yeah, money does come back.. but my buying is just getting too excessive.

20/F. For context, I'm diagnosed with Bipolar 2 and when I have depressive episodes, I start binge spending on amazon shopping as a coping mechanism. What safeguards can I put into place to avoid spending my paychecks?

I grew up poor. When I was little, I remember a classmate laughed at the shirt I was wearing cause it was worn out. That memory stayed. Some kids made me feel less just because we were not well off in life. Now I'm 30 and have hoarded and have an addiction to thrift shopping. I have poor money management, I hate myself so much. Just wanted to vent out. This is my first week of trying to control my finances. I'm addicted to clothes, shoes, bed covers, any sort of fabric. A lot of wasted money. This sucks. Can anyone relate? I have no savings because of my shopping addiction.

i’m a student (19yo) with a shopping addiction and i ended up racking up some debt on klarna and clearpay, maybe about £200. some transactions are literally me owing them like £8, but one is £120

what will they actually do? i am genuinely broke to shit i have no job until september and no real way of paying this back

i know it’s such a tiny amount but all my money has to go towards paying for university and i genuinely have none spare i regret it sm

Hi all. I'm a 56F, housebound with chronic illnesses, and I appear to have a shopping addiction - specifically, for buying books and DVDs which reflect my various interests. I've had it for years, but up until recently it's been sort of manageable. Over the last few months I have been buying loads of Hallmark books and films. I just can't seem to resist the urge to buy things and have gone quite mad. There are currently many Hallmark books released onto the market second hand, and often only one available, which is hard to resist. Like a lot of shoppers, I find the high wears off once I get the item and it tends to just sit on the shelf. I am absolutely not proud of this behaviour.

Please don't say "Just go to the library & borrow your books!" People often come out with that one, but the hit is absolutely not the same, plus I can't get to the library easily. Also, I can't read books on a screen - it has to be a physical book.

I have tried to share this in a FB support group and got made fun of for buying "out of date media", which is totally not the point! I guess I'm old-fashioned lol.

I'm trying to understand what might have happened to trigger this particularly bad bout. There's obviously an element of depression about my situation. Plus, I have family problems. My mother appears to be undergoing cognitive decline and she can also be very emotionally abusive. I can't really share anything with her as she will use it against me later, unfortunately, and can be extremely judgemental. I have learned to grey rock like a champ, sadly. Asking Mum for support would be a risky move on my part.

One of my illnesses is Crohn's disease which has been very bad over the last few years, and has kept me indoors. I had to have an emergency colectomy a few months ago and I'm still recovering. I guess books and DVDs are an escape in one sense. Plus, they aren't going to leave me or let me down, are they? They are company in a rather lonely life.

Another possibility is the steroids I'm currently on - they can apparently make you feel a bit "high". Maybe that's expressing itself in an increase in spending? I wouldn't say I was manic in any other way - I don't have the energy tbh!

Whatever, I must stop. I just can't believe the amount I've bought over the last few months. I am trying to watch the DVDs I've already bought and haven't got around to. Ditto the books. I am trying to develop other interests which aren't too strenuous, such as writing poetry and knitting.

Well, it's good to get this out, as I can't really tell anyone in real life. Thanks for reading!

i’ve been working since i was 18 and i have failed to keep ONE paycheck fully without spending ANYTHING. I’m genuinely tired of this. I want to change this and learn how to budget and manage my money so that I won’t always be the short end of the stick. unfortunately, I feel like my mother especially, wants to constantly use me for money because she knows I got this spending addiction and unhealthy ways of spending money from her, and I think she’s using that to target me and have her give her money when she can’t be responsible for her own financial problems and issues she put on herself.

I really don’t wanna end up like my mom. My brothers are the complete opposite — knowing how to save money while being able to afford the things they like to buy. I wish I was like them, but my brothers are more mentally stable unlike myself, who struggles with huge anxiety and major depression to the point that spending money is not something i only do as an addiction.

My mom encouraged me to set up a credit union and so far, I haven’t touched it at all. I guess that’s something, right? But she still ridicules me, and it gets to the point where i’m afraid to tell her how much money I have. A part of me feels like I shouldn’t tell her how much money I have or wanting to give her money at all so it could help me at least save something, but in the end I know this is up to me to handle my money.

If anyone has any advice, I would really appreciate it! I have not saved much in my bank account and I’m starting to question why am I even working if I can’t save any money?

I struggled for years, because I kept buying things while fully convinced that, if I couldn't find a place or meaning to it, I'd just re-sell it online. This was even before vinted was born, and most of my transactions went through eBay.

I finally learned how utterly false such an idea is. You have to spend hours of your life taking pictures and videos of things working, answering to every single question from the buyer, put up with their difficult haggling schemes.

And if, AND ONLY IF, you are finally able to sell an item (and some of my items have sat on eBay for years) you'll have to find a good box for it, package it properly (sometimes even investing in bubble wrap, for fragile items), get acquainted with shipping options, drive to the nearest collect centre.

And I can confidently say this was somewhat worth only for items which were highly sought after and expensive. Spending days of my life to get rid of a handful of items topping 20-25 euros felt miserable. It's phisically and emotionally draining.

TLDR: your money is lost the moment you buy things.

I HAVE TO STOP!! 😭😭😭😭

I have gained a substantial amount of weight the past 1-2 years, due to a combination of factors (medication, aging, hormones, going back to WFH).

I got into the habit of online shopping to deal with negative emotions in the pandemic like so many did. i started to curtail my shopping then my clothes no longer fit. I now have enough clothes to wear based on my lifestyle and honestly bc I wfh I don’t really dress up much anyway.

anyway, I have found that allowing myself to shop for necessary clothes has reopened the floodgates. I find myself browsing and buying things I immediately regret.

basically… help? how do I get myself to a better place again? has anyone been in this situation where they changed sizes and it kicked up their addiction? have you successfully stopped it?

How were you able to explain to them that they need to think about it? Given that they are entering a new, exciting, confusing time in their lives and everything is new, flashy, attractive, seemingly necessary because others have it or role models in their lives are influencing them to buy it?

So, I am wondering about a rule that I set to myself like: don't buy into the urge immediately. Wait 24, 48 hours... I manage to wait, sometimes 10 days, 20 days, and the urge is there like an "unfinished business". Saying this because I am currently fighting to not buy something I definitely don't need, but it keeps coming to my mind. How do you deal with it?