I would say probably a psychotic disorder such as schizophrenia or schizoaffective, and then id say things such as OCD, Severe PD, DID, and eating disorders

TW: suicidal thoughts

It was so bad that I would randomly punch myself in the head whenever the suicidal thoughts hit and I was underweight. I never really thought I would get better or that those thoughts would ever go away because I'd been living like that for most of my teenage years.

Now that I'm 20, I'm still not where I want to be, but I'm feeling so so so much better mentally. I don't overthink everything anymore, and I don't constantly have suicidal thoughts whenever I'm alone or isolating myself from other people.

To anyone who's struggling right now don't let the darkness fool you into thinking you can't get better. Trust me I thought the exact same thing. But now I'm doing so much better mentally, and I finally feel at peace in a way I never thought I could. It feels like I've finally found myself again.

Please don't give up and be kind to yourself no matter what.

I end up screaming full force just about every day . "PLEASE GOD KILL ME!" "MAKE IT STOP!!!" "KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME KILL ME"

Anybody else ?

i am extremely disabled from my mental illness. basically do nothing all day just sleep and exist. my parents said they are going to force me into a nursing home permanently. i am in my 20s, this is not how i expected life to be. feeling hopeless. what do i do

I feel like I'm just doing my best to make it through the next day.. but the constant criticism and judgment that I receive makes it all the more unbearable

Im stuck in the bathroom since like 2 hours cause it feels like there so a monster outside the door that will tear me to shreds if I step outside or even make too much Noice. I know it isn't real, I know its down and Im overreacting, but it still feels like something is waiting for me outside thats going to kill me or something Idk I just dont know what to do. Its the middle of the night, I have stuff to do tomorrow, I need to get out but I can't ger myself to move. I have been trying to distract myself with youtube or finding someone online to distract myself enough to get through it enough to just run up to my room and maybe finally start getting to sleep but it is t working. It usually takes a while, but it feels like Ive been here for hours and it isn't working. I am legit just crying i. The bathroom. I am not hallucinating, I am not hearing anything, it just feels like something is out there. (I have a pretty overactive imagination, and can pretty often imagine something just beyond the corner or behind a door, but it usually isn't this bad. I just wanna get up and go to sleep, but I still can't get myself to move. If anyone has any tips or anything, is appreciated it. I am scared of even crying to loudly rn, it feels like whatever outside will hear.

My cat is outside scratching at the door right now so Im trying to focus on my cat, but it feels like the constant scratching and meowing is making it worse. He knows Im in here, and petting him usually makes it better but I can't even get myself over to the door, much less open it. I do t even know if this is the right subreddit, I just feels so stressed right now, I dont even know if I will be able to go to sleep once I get to my room, I know nothing is out there but my brain still doesn't let me believe it, I am just so scared and I do t i ow what to do

Sorry if this was completely undecupheravle I just wanted to find something to distract myself with, it feels like its helping a little bit Im still so scared and its never been this bad

But still if anyone has any tips I would appreciate it so so much. I do t even know if this is the right flair. Sorry if it is not.

Update: My mom ended up getting me out of it by knocking on the door and such. I have managed to get to my room and feel a lot better now, but still feel bad for waking my parents up since they have work tomorrow. Thanks to anyone who took the time to read at all, any tips o. How to prevent future panoc-attacks (or whatever you should call it) are still highly appreciated.

It's driving me nuts. Every little thing someone says I remember forever.

My friend gets slightly louder because we have a misunderstanding, I feel like crap. I mess up something minor, I feel like crap. Something goes wrong, I feel like crap.

I feel like such a pussy.

Recently my dad bought cookies for us both and jokingly says "leave some for me". I didn't eat a single cookie from that package because I felt so hurt and greedy for nothing. It's ridiculous. He even offered me the last cookie and I said no.

I wish I could just stop.

This post is really gonna make me look bad. But like genuinely how do you stop being an asshole? I have BPD and im supposed to be taking Latuda to help with my mood swings. Havnt been on it since my son was born on May 18th though. Im 18 and a single mom. Still talk to his dad we had a long conversation the other day about how we were gonna fix our relationship and everything then he spend the next day calling me a hoe and blowing up my phone accusing me of shit while I was at work. I kept my cool and thought I could look past that and went forward with the whole us fixing our shit. Nope. He came iver today. I was looking forward to it and everything. I bought him his favorite gummies and everything so I know i was excited before. But then when he got here we kinda just got freaky and then about an hour later he went outside to get food his mom doordashed him (even though I had told him I planned on making food for everyone for dinner) and I kinda js locked him out. Ignored his calls and knocking pleading to get back in until he left. Then i just told him I didnt want to be anything with him. Didn't want him loving up on me and he was just a fuck to me. Part of that is true. I dont think i really have feelings for him anymore. Im just attached to him. How to just stop? Why am I such an asshole?

Hi everyone, I recently filed a Short Term Disability claim with my workplace due to depression and anxiety, and I have my phone interview with a case worker coming up. I am absolutely terrified about going through the phone interview, because I'm super worried about accidentally saying anything that could get my disability leave claim denied.

Has anyone gone through this process before? What kind of questions will they ask and any advice on how to best answer them so your claim isn't denied?

Additionally, I'm thinking of asking my psychologist to write a letter outlining my symptoms and limitations on my job functions. The idea is that in the case I did mess up in the interview, maybe my psychologist's letter can balance it out. Would this be a good move, or unnecessary?

Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you

Wonder your perspective

I just honestly need to talk to anyone...

So iv been dealing with being really tired for the past few months, at first i thought it was my vita d lvls cos. After my first blood result in March it was 6 ng but now its back up to 80+ and im still feeling tired/look tired.

Now my doctor told me that im mentally exhausted cos im tired,get annoyed very quick,feeling a bit down/depressed/nothing interests me anymore.

My doctor also said it's cos of my lifestyle

Ill admit my lifestyle is pretty bad,i work nights and when i come home at 7am i eat something then just watch YouTube till like 10/11 am go to bed and wake up at 8,shower and get ready for work..don't do ant sports or rately leave my house other then for work or grocceries.

Now is there anything that i can do that Will help me feel less tired?

I am planning to get back to the gym next week

i’ve been really going through it. and i’ve been taking 10 to 12 benedryls every night hoping it eventually takes me. my heart has been hurting and i fell when i was on it and hit my head so bad. the side affects are horrible but im hoping it eventually takes me. even off it i feel completely fried. but i feel like i deserve this. tonight im planning on taking an entire bottle that i got. i’m so done

I would like to share something very personal here.

At the beginning of the year, I had a carotid artery dissection. Since then, my life has completely changed. I live with a very sensitive nervous system, I am autistic and have ADHD—things that have always shaped me, but have become even more intense through this experience.

After the dissection, I started having anxiety attacks. The fear of dying suddenly became real and tangible. Things that once felt normal began to feel unsafe. I even had to give up my dream: sport Ju-Jutsu. It was a big part of my identity, and letting it go was painful.

But at the same time, it was exactly this that led me to art.

My art is more than just expression—it speaks for me when words fail. It always exists in the tension between life and death, between decay and beauty. That is exactly how the name came to be: Candy Decay.

Sweetness and decay. Life and impermanence. Hope and fear.

Art helps me heal, even though I know it is a long journey. It gives my feelings space without needing to explain them. It is my outlet, my support, and sometimes even my courage.

Maybe someone will recognize themselves in this. Maybe it will help someone feel a little less alone.

Don’t want him. Just want to be loved. And now it doesn’t even feel like my friend anymore. Like shes always otp with him and talking about him. Its like not even her own person anymore but also I’m insecure because she probably got loved by being skinny.

Ever since I was a little kid I’ve had this burning feeling in my chest of wanting to hurt. It’s this innate want to hurt everyone around me even though they’ve done nothing to me. I have a want to have a downward spiral and idk why. I think part of me wants to see how low I can sink my mental health. I did something shitty yesterday. A content creator I like was involved with some drama and I posted about it on a Reddit and he got upset about it on his stream. I knew the harassment he was getting and shouldn’t have called attention to it but I did and I didn’t even notice it was a shitty thing to do until I was told it was. I have an obsession with blood also, idk why but I love it. I’m not trying to sound edgy. I just feel like I’m losing it. I would never act on these thoughts, I just don’t understand why I have them. Sometimes I’ll be so lost in my head and thinking of stabbing people constantly and I’ll have a moment of clarity where I realize how messed up I am. I’ve been hurt a lot too I guess but I’m probably not the best person either, idk

I will be going throigh a rough period, im scared, jm really scsred. I dont wsnt to fscr this, but i have to and i just need smmeone to tell me im going to be okay, i just want to believe in myself, please.

I’m a 17 year old (18 in less than a month) and I feel like I have no purpose in life and no business being a part of anyone’s.
I really don’t feel like I’ve impacted anyone for the better and I have yet to be convinced that I can invoke a genuine positive reaction or feeling out of anyone whether it be a family member a friend or a lover.
I’m so lonely especially give the fact that I moved to a foreign country in my teens and failed time and time again to find my place there even after a few years of living and somewhat adapting in that country.
My friend circle gets smaller and smaller by the year and I can barely open up to anyone except for one person who I’m eternally thankful and grateful for.
But despite seeking help and closure in someone these issues persist and only worsen with time
I have a fear of being abandoned or forgotten and I feel threatened by the two constantly and it this feeling of worry arises mainly when I start uncontrollably overthinking despite how much I try to convince myself that what I’m feeling or my response to stimuli is nothing but an overreaction but the feelings linger and I feel so fucking guilty about it because I only end up making matters worse for other people and as a result making matters way worse for myself.
I blame myself for every friend I ever lost and for every promise made to me that I somehow caused to be broken.
I really dislike myself and don’t feel like I deserve all the little victories I achieve or experience in life.
I try taking out this ever growing feeling on myself and as much as it helps me take out my stress and anger towards myself ultimately on myself.
I’m truly alone on this and have been told that I’m the only person that can actually help myself
I tried countless times trying to convince myself that it’s okay or whatever I’m going through will be over soon.
I get proven wrong every single damn time.
I seek for acceptance when I can’t even accept myself.
How can I find love when I myself don’t feel deserving of it?
How can a feeling be reciprocated when the person that invokes the feeling originally doesn’t know when or how to stop?
How can I stop hating myself when I feel like the hate I get is deserved?
I’m posting this here and for the first time on a public platform in hopes of finding some sort of help or guidance as a last resort so please feel free to share your experiences if you share any of these feelings and if you managed to overcome these feelings please tell me how I can too.